Citizens Living In Teamwork, Organization, Resourcefulness, Insanity, and Security

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ATTENTION!

CHEDDAR! WHERE ARE YOU?!? I MUST KNIFE YOU!

CHEDDAR! WE MISS YOU!

Kylestyle for Everything '10! Now with more everything!


ICH LIEBE DICH.


AAHV001100.jpg

L.O.L. Get it, it's a man in a boat! Roflcopters! (or also acceptable) LoLerskates!

No, i don't get it? What's happening? What is he doing? Does it involve a fish? OH GOD IT DOES!



Citizens Living In Teamwork, Organization, Resourcefulness, Insanity, and Security
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Abbreviation: C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S
Group Numbers: something like but not necessarily 3
Leadership: Irishmen and Plsck
Goals: Take back Malton by force
Recruitment Policy: Anyone we can fucking get, we got no standards, like a drunk chick
Contact: #clitoris on irc.nexuswar.net

Citizens Living In Teamwork, Organization, Resourcefulness, Insanity, and Security is a group that believes we have deluded ourselves into believing that long term defense of physical structures from large hordes is more important then survival. We are not advocating pacifism, but rather a new approach to how we expend lives in the face of the dead. On the whole survivors can stand to be a bit more frugal in combat operations.

Due to low numbers, C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S has become more of the abused very sexy love child of Irish and plscks, there is much stabbing, newspaper slapping, toolbox hitting, and CRing. It is a very good time though.





All Survivors Welcome

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We welcome any and all survivors and undead to join our fight against the undead hordes. See below for information on joining. We may be nuts as hell HECK, but we swear we know what we're doing! Taking back Malton by CENSORED brute CENSORED force!!!!!

Requirements:

(when reading this, picture a nicely dressed man in uniform saying it, with a grunt soldier that's been shoveling dirt for no reason, screaming the stuff in parenthesis at you and jumping and pointing at you!)

  • 1. Be willing to follow orders (bizarre and obscene orders! Mostly involving the combat revival of zombahs! As well as giving them headshot's in the street with beer bottles)
  • 2. Be able to coordinate on the IRCs or on a forum (It better be through the IRCs or we'll PK you in the street with beer bottles!)
  • 3. Follow our rules (our crazy entirely sober crack-pipe influenced rules!)
  • 4. Set your group name to "C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S" NOT "C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S." (please note the extra period in the wrong one)
  • 5. Embrace the hotdog pie.

Recruitment procedure is yet to be determined, though if you are interested, jump into the IRC channel, and wait for someone to come around. If the IRCs scare you, then hit up discussion page.

Security Policy and Recruitment

We are willing to accept survivors and undead from any walk of life or unlife, so long as you are willing to be in our group and our group alone. We do not care what groups your alts may be involved with, but sharing info

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This user is British.

is punishable by any means from newspaper slap to death followed by skull CENSORED, depending on the severity of the crime. And also, killing one of your own(us) will result in hell reigning down on you!

The Five Pillars

  • Teamwork - We work together to survive.
  • Organization - We are more organized than the undead hordes
  • Resourcefulness - We can headshot a zombie with a beer bottle in the street.
  • Insanity - We're crazy, that's why we'll headshot zombies with beer bottles.
  • Security - We keep our bonds in Safe Deposit boxes!

Ranks

Irishmen knows all!

We have offensive and Defensive stations and whatever station you qualify for you better fulfill your duty, otherwise we will assign you a new one, or kill lightly taunt (CENSORED you in your sleep) you.....

Staff

There is a small group which runs the IRCs and group itself. These are the staff members:

Stations

Dr. Redder is in charge of preaching to the masses and sanitizing the wiki of your profanity. Also, being shit POOP late.

Irishmen is in charge of the scouting, directing, and leading.

Plsck is Senior Tea Brewman, he is also in charge of the books and coordinating the knifing of Dr. Redder

Veronica Teartiff is damage control.

Current Suburb

C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S is currently taking Wray Heights back by force! ..... uh, MEASS MEDIA!

Redrum map!

Allies

Your Mu- NO.

SPEECH SECTION

And here for no reason at all is a portion of a random speech!

"Let him depart; his passport shall be made, And crowns for convoy put into his purse; We would not be headshot in that zambah's company That fears his fellowship to die with us. This day is call'd the feast of *********. He that outlives this day, and comes safe home, Will stand a tip-toe when this day is nam'd, And rouse him at the name of *********. He that shall live this day, and see old age, Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours, And say 'To-morrow is Saint *********.' Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars, And say 'These wounds I had on *********'s day.' Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot, But he'll remember, with advantages, What feats he did that day. Then shall our names," --Jea (though edited for our purposes, a little)

WELL DONE ASIV

Once upon a time, there was a Malton where zombah's ran free and did what they wanted. Where people listened when they complained about being CRed and Headshot in the streets. This was a terrible time in the history of malton! But now a new force has emerged to help deal with this blight of zombah wussfullness. This new force was by a wonderfull twist of fate to be called Citizens Living In Teamwork, Organization, Resourcefulness, Insanity, and Security! Or C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S for short! We the Clit, are all about screwing static defense, the overuse of Combat Revival in general, the Combat Revival of rotters in powered NT's, the headshotting of zombahs in the street with beer bottles, ski poles, hockey sticks, and the such, mass media, random hilarious propaganda, and the mass knifing of Dr. Redder (though never to death! Anyone who kills our doc will feel the wrath of the clit fall down upon them!) Though it may seem strange for a pro survivor group to embrace the constant knifing of a pro survivor, I assure you all, it is all in good fun, and thus the ready cache of random melee weapons for use against our wonderful Dr. SEXY PANTS! In any case the clit is a group that understands the workings of being in "the shit" for too long, we also have a very keen grasp on the functioning of the more organized zombah groups, and most importantly of all, we know how to have a damn crazy fun time when we need to! Also, all hail Irishmen! As he will lead us into the depths of the zombah hordes of Malton for all eternity! --plscks 07:14, 16 June 2009 (BST)

/Start speech

MY PANTS ARE ON FIRE! GIVE ME YOUR HAIR!!!

/end speech

--plscks 08:04, 14 July 2009 (BST)

OH GOD IT JUST MADE THE FIRE WORSE AND NOW YOU SMELL AWFUL TOO I DON'T EVEN WANT TO PUT YOU OUT NOW. GET AWAY FROM ME. -Rddr

And now for no rasin at all:

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Thank you, this message has been approved by plscks

Rules

I don't know what rules there are other than the aforementioned rules! You better watch out for this section though!

  • Knife Cheddar at least once.....every time you need healing!
  • Spray the wiki page tinyurl address at any building you sleep in. http://tinyurl.com/ckwv22
  • Accept any and all raping with a knife that my occur as humor and in good fun.
  • Use booze bottles and newspapers on zombahs whenever in a fight! And also the occasional axe or knife.

And most important:

  • Always have a good funny time of everything you do! Just as long as it is for the survivor cause!

Disclaimer

Any and all advise and comments made by this group is not to be taken seriously on a real life level.

Seriously, it's all in jest. I hope.

Back Story

Irishmen, Plsck, and Dr. Redder hunkering down in their first HQ. From left to right: Plsck, Irishmen, Dr. Redder

One day back in mid April 2009, Irishmen had a grand idea to start the survivor group of all survivor groups. Backed by his 12 page manifesto, he went on to banter his ideas all over the IRCs and interwebs! At first only the lone Plsck would opt to embrace his great ideas. After a few days a group name was decided on and an IRCs channel created, from there Dr. Redder agreed to join based on the fact that there would be a wiki page. Irishmen, Plsck, and Dr. Redder went on to voyage to the first suburb in need of help that they could find. It was there that they built a temporary home, moving home base every few days. Then somehow Irishmen managed to talk Veronica Teartiff into joining the defunct group. Together the four of them will take the suburb back into survivor hands, and will hopefully continue to grow C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S' numbers!

Early Successes

  • 05/10/2009 - Today, C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S had a triumphant victory over Batshit Insane! Our crazy willingness to sell out Reverend TINYBOY FONDLE scared them off into the nite from whence they came. They may have taken The Creek Building, but Plsck combat revived Jonx and wounded another in a valiant feat of super idiocy. He also forgot about Death scent, entirely. Also Irishmen gave them a new genny to chew on for a little while. In any case this victory will go deep into the anals of Cheddars butt! annals of C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S history!--plscks 22:30, 10 May 2009 (BST)
  • 07/05/09 (fuk u merikka) - I had a well tasty Pie for tea. - Rddr
  • 05/07/2009 - Perryn NT - Just because she got sick and tired of looking at the mess that was Perryn NT, Veronica Teartiff grabbed a generator, went to Perryn and within minutes had it fixed, powered and caded. She's under no illusions that they'll mess it up again. That's what they do. Plsck provided much need harassment of the waiting undead by lighting matches beneath their feet and then shooting them while they danced. He laughs so strangely when he does this. --JackAscii
  • 04/30/2009 - Blesley mall - We took it back with three survivors and Betty. Later, Reverend TINYBOY FONDLE cleaned up the mess we made thus securing the mall. After other survivors showed up, the mall was won. We only suffered a 40% casualty rate. As it turns out, the retardiness of Reverend TINYBOY FONDLE cost the survivors the mall.

Mortal Enemies

BASALT.

Batshit Insane!

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C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S has pledged support to the KyleStyle For Everything '09 Campaign, agreeing that Kyle should be given every conceivable responsibility in the game.


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Yet another proud supporter of the Malton Zombie Recycling Program

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