Club Hardyman

From The Urban Dead Wiki

Jump to: navigation, search


Club Hardyman
EHB, lights are on
Danger Updater MDUDC 17:48, 29 December 2018 (UTC)
Club Hardyman

Pescodside [93,16]

Ludwell Lane Fire Station the Keats Museum Wedmore Grove
Headland Street Fire Station Club Hardyman Featherstone Library
wasteland the Love Building wasteland

Basic Info:

  • Clubs are Dark buildings.
  • The usual internal description of a Club reads as follows:
    "…in the near-darkness of the main dancefloor."
  • When powered by a portable generator, the internal description changes to the following:
    "Coloured spotlights highlight an empty stage, and distorted music echoes over the speakers."
  • Clubs can be barricaded normally.

Club Hardyman.jpg


Club Hardyman is an abandoned disco club located in the suburb of Pescodside. Ali "Solid Gold Dancer" Giorgione opened the club in 1976 as an adult disco named "Adult Disco - No Children", for Malton's "disco fever" crazed locals. Unfortunately the disco club, or very possibly its name, did not inspire a popular turnout. With only a few customers visiting each week, and half of those patrons being lost people who only wanted directions to Treweeke Mall, the disco's future appeared to be doomed. By the summer of 1977, Ali's son, Sal "Super Fly" Giorgione, had convinced Ali to hand over the reigns and let a younger generation take a crack at the business. Sal quickly switched gears by hiring the now legendary Malton disc jockey Grandmaster G-G-Giga-mix and with his help intended to draw the more energetic young Hip Hop patrons to the club.

According to an interview with Sal in the Daily Malton the origin of the club's name was an interesting, if hard to understand, story in itself. Or as Sal put it, "So we had been lookin' for a name for about 3 months, and we were sittin' down watchin' some TV and my ma she saw an ad for those Hardyman TV Meals; and she was all like why dontcha name it Club Hardyman, 'cause damn they made some damn fine meals – and we were all like, nah get outta here. The next day we got up sayin' Club Hardyman sounded smokin' hot. So we got it from my mom, she named it." The mother in question turned out to be none other than Candy Suxxx, famous hooker who nowadays can be found wandering the streets outside Hooker Bank.

Post-"Malton Incident", the disco club does still see some action. From time to time young hip-hop survivors have been known to hook up a portable generator to power the dance floor's lights and music. While these nights are few and far between at least it shows that Sal's dream lives on long after he evacuated the city.

Barricade Policy

This building should be Extremely Heavily barricaded at all times. This is in accordance with the mutually agreed-upon Pescodside Barricade Plan set forth by local survivor groups and the Dulston Alliance, who routinely work together to monitor that the barricades for this building are at the aforementioned level. This building is meant to serve as a safehouse for Malton's veteran survivors.

Survivors who find the building's barricades below their assigned level are asked to assist in raising them back up in order to help ensure the safety of all the survivors staying inside the building. Any survivor found lowering the barricades may be directly "put to the question" by any member of the Dulston Alliance or a vigilante-minded survivor who catches the culprit in the act. If this happens the accused survivor must present a valid reason for their actions or be labeled a zombie spy/death cultist and be judged accordingly. So always be cautious lest you find yourself summarily executed for crimes against humanity.


If the disco is powered then survivors can expect to hear lots of Disco Era music. The most popular song demanded by patrons is none other than "Stayin Alive", the single release performed by "The Bee Gees" (1977). Survivors should not be surprised to walk into the club in time to hear...

Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm.
I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right, it's O.K.
And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand
The New York Times' effect on man.
Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Feel the city breakin'
And ev'rybody shakin'
And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive.
Stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha,
Stayin' alive...

Before very possibly turning around and leaving again.

Stret3.JPG Amusing Location
This location is on the list of Amusing Locations in Malton

Personal tools