Diary of a certified loon

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Years after the so-called Malton incident ended cleaning crews found a series of journals by members of an unknown group of survivors that lived in Dartside. They chronical the stress and hardship that occurred during the disaster as well as the bitter fighting between survivor groups. The person that found the journals compiled them into a book and made millions while the original authors disappeared into obscurity and possibly death. Some would call this unfair.

To add a little flavor to Urban Dead stew, add a pinch of personal observation. Feel free to add an entry.

May 3rd. Bocaj Claw, Dear booky thing: As the days go on I feel the stress of tealessness. The constant zombies assaults have left my nerves frayed, although that might just be the caffiene withdrawel. The constant shooting of the human like figures of zombies would surely drive me insane if I had a car but lacking that I will just keep on killing them until I mysteriously learn how to aim my gun better or perhaps how to spray paint. Supplies are scarce and if it weren't for this HORRIBLE bleeding wound I would have nothing to write with. Oh well. I had better wrap this entry up. Its time for the nip over to the hospital. That and my wound has clotted again so I'm out of "ink."

May 3rd Angussporran, Dear dairy: This has been an important day for me. After spending a week at dead revive point, I finally realised nothing was happening. So I set out for abarrow monument, and when I got there up came this message "There are 9 dead bodies- you recognise one of them as Bocaj Claw." So I sank to my knees and screamed NOOOOOO! for a few hours and when i got up I realised I was human again. I headed for Beete Bank, and found it abandoned, all save for a mysteriuos player named errrr....I seem to have forgotten his name. But he was part of a group called Taureg (who I think wont try and kill us). I sent out for Marven Mall, which is currently abondoned and under neither zombie or human control, which is nice since I really hate crowds when I'm "shopping". Good luck to all and goodbyne!

I Came For Ze Tea --Madelena 15:14, 26 May 2006 (BST)

May 25th, night, NW Dartside - An office tower, by the looks of it. I'm almost knee-deep in memos.. someone has sprayed "Oddlots Irregulars- who wants jelly and icecream?" across the cracked marble wall of the lobby. Teasing bastards. So weary I can barely replace the rusting file cabinet against the jagged hole I've managed to pull myself through. Just look at these scrapes and glass splinters - only the thought of them breaking off in my flesh or getting infected keeps me awake enough to seal off the window again before the enterprising horde outside notices that weakness in the defenses.

They picked up my scent as I entered South Blythville and it's been a desperate shambling chase ever since, with one chilling hour spent crawling under a gauntlet of rotting hands as they literally beat the bushes for me in Pattison Park. Marven Mall seemed closed for business, entrances blocked by overturned cars and heaps of sometimes wriggling bodies. Good luck to those barricaded within. I wouldn't want to be them for all the kicky summer capri pants in Malton.

So tired, but with no one monitor the zeds outside I'm finding it hard to sleep more than a few minutes at a time. Alone in the dark again, after so many whimsical encounters with the survivor communities of Havercroft, Lerweill Heights, North Blythville. I hope it was worth leaving their friendly hearths for the chance of scoring a decent cup of tea in Dartside.


Another day, another disappointment -- --Bocaj Claw 03:48, 2 June 2006 (BST)

Another day in the Dartside suburb of Malton. I'm beginning to despair that we'll ever accomplish what we came here to do. The factories we sought to plunder are ransacked and more or less empty. The goods have been previously pilfered. If not for the shame of facing my subordinates back home and their questions of "Why did a trip to the supermarket take a year?" and "Will you validate my parking" I would return back to the domain that I'm familiar with. I probably would too, if I remembered where it was. I shouldn't have slept on the way to Malton.

I have begun to fill the gaps between shooting anything that moved slowly and sleeping by learning how to dance. My fellow survivors in the [CLASSIFIED] building are usually sleeping when I'm practicing so I've taken to dancing with the zombies outside. If Legend of Zelda has taught me one thing its that zombies are good at dancing. I even asked some zombie named Awakened Puppet or something like that to dance with me today but he just lay on the floor and twitched a little. Granted, I had shot him several times with a shotgun earlier but you would think he would at least put in the effort! Its okay though. I wasn't dancing too hot today either.

Luckily I found a handheld radio today that I thought would help with my dancing endeavors. Unfortunatly, the only music channel still transmitting is the 24 hour spanish music channel. I can only listen to "La Bamba" and "La Cucaracha" so many times before I have an urge to eat the radio! Or anything edible really. Maybe I should quit this dancing thing and take up drawing. I could draw a comic to cheer up my fellow non-deadbeats. Bah! What am I saying! I couldn't see myself as a cartoonist, even if the tiny me that sits on my shoulder tells me I can do it.

I think I've gone insane.

Sincerely, Napoleon Bonaparte.

Dear Mr. Diary

Urban Dead is denying my pc access, telling me the ip has accesed it too much. THIS IS A DOWNRIGHT LIE!! Ah well, I think I'll cope. My survivor has had a rough time, what with the invasions and getting killed and being tea deprived. Still, my new fire axe is VERY handy. I never knew zombies could be cut into bitesized chunks. I could make a new breakfast cereal... Anyways...good luck to you all etc etc.

Yours balndly, Angussporran

October 22 (Looks to be early in the morning),

Can't find the boss anywhere. wonder if he is doing alright. Oy, hey, picked up a bit better gunhandling skills and know how to use a radio better now. All the blasted zombies outside the hospital. Zoms just don't learn do they? Well, it's a good spot for FAKs and when powered by a generator I can do surgery there. Just running back and forth mostly from an abandoned train station and there. Hmm...

-dustman, EMT and zombie butt-kicker (I'm working on that part still).

Much later (that same day?),

The days are starting to blur together. Remind self to check for what day it is if it is on any of the radio stations. Healed someone who looked like they could use it inside the train station. Killed a zombie today. It may have been a straggler from a larger horde. Hmm, is this what being a zombie hunter feels like? I'll try saying it. "So this is what being a zombie hunter feels like" eh? No, don't feel anything. Perhaps I am just too new at it. Oh well, keep practicing, I guess.


The Day before Hallowe'en.

I have given up trying to liberate Spiccer Hills as it's really DULL compared to Dartside. Anyway it appears an attack from the deadly newly formed Big Bash group has put us from green to orange on the suburbs map (yes, I've done my UD homework).

There was plenty of action when I came back to Dartside! 1. I have taken up using firearms- hopefully getting a shotgun soon (more on that later). Feeling a bit like Dustman in his last post, to be honest! 2. Whilst gathering ammo in a police station came across a nasty zombie spy called Just David, who I killed and dumped outside. 3. Have left Dartside to go to Marven Mall, so I can get a shotgun. When I got there I realised I had forgot to buy the 'shopping' skill or whatever. Blast! Am now killing zombies outside the Mall till I get 100xp...

Yours hyperly, Angus sporran a.k.a. to Claw- Cheesecake

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