Illuminati

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The New World Order
Banner Illumniati.JPG


Coming Soon to a Massacre Near You!



Illuminati
Stack-em Up!
Leadership: Dictator
Motto: "It's only a game, but it's OUR game."
Goals: Well... NOT Taking Over The World!
Group Numbers: What group? We don't know what you're talking about.
Recruitment Policy: If you're one of us, you're one of us.
Contact: Find us in-game or send a PM to *The'Kitty on [1]or Duck on [2] or come talk to us on IRC here



Illuminati


We are the Illuminati.

We are a secret confederacy of Malton's enlightened, free-thinking bounty hunters. We are not the so-called "power behind the throne" nor are we shadowy influence-brokers comprised of representatives from many of Urban Dead's most elite player groups. We have absolutely no interest in either establishing or maintaining a New World Order. Under no circumstances are we now, nor have we ever been, even remotely inclined to exercise control over world affairs via our many unseen and unquestionably loyal non-existent agents.

Many conspiracy theorists mistakenly believe we are the masterminds behind events that will insidiously and inexorably lead to the progression of a new era in which no aspect of human existence is not managed by this exclusive circle of the power elite!!! *ahem* Let us assure you that these sorts of conspiratorial endeavors are the furthest things from our minds.

History


The movement was founded in 1776, in Snootsylvania (Bavaria) by a wealthy, self-important, little cheese lover regrettably named Kreps Trigger. Herr Trigger's group and its adherents were given the name "Illuminati" although they have also been called both The Order of Illuminati and The Bavarian Cream Illuminati in reference to the form of enlightenment that is required for advancement in the ranks and their love of delicate pastry treats, respectively. In 1777, Karl Theordor, ruler of Bavaria banned all secret societies, including the Illuminati. Following this, the Illuminati operated outside the law and in secret, bound eternally by an undying hatred of those toffee-nosed donkey lickers, the Freemasons and pledging unquestioning loyalty to their superiors. The ranks of the Illuminati are reported to have been divided into three main classes: the soft cheeses, the hard cheeses and the big cheese. The order's cheesy branches extended into most countries of the European continent and was rumored to have indoctrinated over 2,000 members over the years (most of whom have dropped dead from cholesterol related maladies or tragic Freemason hunting accidents.) Many influential intellectuals and progressive politicians were counted among its membership, including Don Giva Fuchs and Klaus Shotz, distinguished snack-loving men of philosophy and sportsmanship.




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