User:A mountain lion

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A Mountain Lion

Sensational news coverage

A mountain lion escaped from the Malton City Zoo on 13 June 2007 and began lurking around Malton in search of meals. During his first 78 days on the city streets, he killed and consumed 39 humans and 1 zombie. In addition, he infected 32 humans. Some of those infected were killed and eaten while others were mauled and left to find treatment for their wounds.

Beginning with his breakfast on 30 August 2007, the mountain lion's kills and maulings are being documented to the best of the ability of a team of field researchers. Those who fell victim to the ravenous puma before this date will not get memorialized here, but the mountain lion fondly remembers tearing at their flesh and thanks each one for the tasty meal.

Current Stats:

Humans Killed: 135

Humans Infected: 234

Zombies Killed: 1

Most Kills Per Day: 4

Trivia about the mountain lion

He wears a flak jacket! A dogooder hippy type concerned about animals caught in the crossfire managed to find a suitably-sized flak jacket and strapped it onto the mountain lion. The mountain lion attempted to thank her for her efforts with a friendly hug, but not knowing his own strength he tore her arms off. Making the best out of a bad situation, he ate her and thanked her again for the excellent meal.

He likes malls! The mountain lion spent several days hiding in Tompson Mall, eating from the food court's trash bins. He behaved himself and even received some veterinary care from some locals who found his hidden lair.

His most kills per day is 4! He'd like to top that soon!

100th Kill

Congratulations, Raynath! You provided the mountain lion with his 100th meal since his escape from the Zoo.

Kill Log

For kills recorded before 1 JAN 2022, see the ARCHIVES PAGE

20 OCT 2022 - While the military sometimes sends in soldiers to try to restore order in Malton, for some reason they keep sending in useless raw recruits like Lapskith. Stalking around Richmond Hills, the lion found this latest Private Genius simply sitting confused in the middle of Dodge Square. The lion mauled, infected, killed, ate, and pooped out Lapskith right on the square's central fountain.

11 OCT 2022 - She was a sk8tr girl, the lion said l8tr girl. Gabel was mauled, infected, died, and consumed. Her skateboard trucks weren't the only things clogged with gore after this vicious slaying. On the positive side, she found her long-lost sisters.... also sitting in the mountain lion's engorged stomach.

5 OCT 2022 - Ben Ellison fancies himself as a soldier, a skilled military scout, and defender of Malton. You should have scouted your comrades a bit better, Ben, for they stood by and watched as you got infected and killed by the mighty mountain lion.

29 SEPT 2022 - Another day, another idiot. This time, Malton newcomer Tony Blundetto was just sitting around on the street outside Caiger Mall. The lion easily infected and killed Tony.

18 SEPT 2022 - Yumi Tanaka seemed like a yummy treat. This fool seemingly thought that hiding in plain site in a mall fully populated and under the control of zombies was a good idea. Yumi's entrails now decorate the food court.

3 SEPT 2022 - Another member of this mysterious "Zerging Meat Puppets" gang, FckFaceMGEEE, decided to enter Holloms Auto Repair after the previous day's sacking. He died painfully.

2 SEPT 2022 - We observed the lion breaking into Holloms Auto Repair, Darvall, which was being defending by a sole human who appeared to be part of some gang or organization called the "Zerging Meat Puppets." We do not know what the gang's name means, but we do know that the lion quickly infected and took care of tassajararabbi, and then proceeded to ruin the building.

30 AUGUST 2022 - On this day, simpleton Videosto decided that laying about on a streetcorner outside Caiger was a good idea. He's now dead and infected courtesy of our mountain lion friend.

28 AUGUST 2022 - In a bloody battle, the lion took down Pelicane, with the final blow being a tasty, fatal infectious bite.

22 AUGUST 2022 - Still wandering around the buffet known as Caiger Mall, the lion killed, infected, and ate Jon Pyre

21 AUGUST 2022 - The horde's continued assault on Caiger saw the lion slay Benjamin Moore, leaving the hapless and incompetent mall defender painted in his own now-infectious blood and gore.

19 AUGUST 2022 - After a prolonged visit to its old zoo home, the mountain lion slinked its way over to Darvall and the box full of chocolates known as Caiger Mall. He made quick work of Oumouma and FckFaceMCGEE

26 JULY 2022 - Tracking the lion to Shuttlebank, we saw some idiot named Chet Mason attempt to combat revive the lion as it stalked do-gooders visiting a local revive point. While Chet managed to escape unscathed, the lion seemed amused by the attempt and a few seconds later killed, infected, and consumed the imbecilic Roger Demarko who had decided to camp in the open on the city streets.

26 JUNE 2022 - The mountain lion lives! Though I suppose we field biologists need to find a new verb to describe the activities of the undead residents and fauna of Malton. Receiving word that the mountain lion had emerged from its strangely long period of torpor, I tracked the beast to Wykewood. Soon, I spied it as it stalked the streets.

Finding a wonded and stunned WasabiTheCatIII on the streets in front of Adalbert General Hospital, the mountain lion quickly pounced, mauled, and then consumed his first documented victim in years.

Rejuvinated by his morning meal, the lion immediately entered the hospital lobby and started an appallingly long and bloody mauling of Foster Reed. Reed managed to parry some attacks, but eventually fell and was eaten by the voracious lion. Enjoy the new infection, Foster!

Maul Log

For maulings recorded before 1 JAN 2022, see the ARCHIVES PAGE

5 OCT 2022 - Caiger Mall's hapless defenders. Again. This time, repeat customer Wolldog1 along with a new customer, yet another useless Army private Cod Commando took their maulings, then slinked off to cry and attempt to fight their infections.

Late AUGUST through early SEPTEMBER - The hapless defenders of Caiger Mall got repeatedly thumped by the vicious mountain lion and other zeds feasting at the Caiger Buffet. The violence and destruction was so wanton and so rapid that the team of biologists was unable to document or keep track of the many maulings.

21 AUGUST 2022 - Jon Pyre, Benjamin Moore, FckFaceMGEEE, and Wolldog1 not only failed to defend their beloved shopping mall, but also failed to defend themselves. Enjoy the gaping wounds and infections, boys! Only human in that section of the mall, Krulthewarriorking, was man enough to attempt to defend himself and others. He received a proper thrashing and infection for his efforts.

19 AUGUST 2022 - The appropriately named FckFaceMGEEE took a nice mauling and received an infection for his failed efforts to "defend" Caiger Mall.

15 AUGUST 2022 - The haphazard defense (if it can be called that) of Caiger Mall took yet another blow as the lion woke up and quickly mauled and infected unshaven javaswiller, Kirkland Trader, Wolldog1, and Luke S.

8 AUGUST 2022 - Julie General Hospital in Kempsterbank - The lion nonchalantly walked right into the hospital lobby, mauled and infected JimBo3, Nathan High, and Roddy Winters, then strolled right out.

6 JUNE 2022 - Upham Auto Repair in Shearbank was the scene of a typically Maltonian wasted effort - Genracy was the latest hero who decided that attempting to revivify the lion would end in something other than disaster. Mildly amused, the lion got a nice infection and mauling to the edge of death's door for his efforts.

Chat with a Mountain Lion

Post comments and questions on the discussion page.

Support the Zoo

The mountain lion enjoyed his time at the Malton City Zoo and periodically returns to visit. He encourages other Maltonians, living or dead, human or animal or otherwise, to visit the zoo and abide by its friendly open arms policy.

He is very fond of The Malton Zookeepers and will not eat or attack them. (There was one mauling incident in July, but it was a mistake!)

Thinkingmonkey.jpg Friend Of The Zoo
The Thinking Monkey brings luck to friends of the Malton City Zoo!
Brainz.gif The Second Big Bash!
This User or Group is a member of The Second Big Bash, and will be coming to your neighborhood soon! Please have lots of fresh brains ready when they arrive with all their friends.