Malton Medical Staff/MMS Testimonial Archive I

MMS Testimonials Archive for 2007

Decisions

feel'nstiff is a member of Zombies a Go Go, a group who have been trying to eat the Staff for a long time, but it appears Ms. Morg has been having quite an effect on this particular group member:

• Morgueasm said "Hi there Feel'nstiff! How have you been enjoying...life?"
• Andrew Von Dirigible said "Should we just, you know, send him back to Zombie a Go Go?"
• feel'nstiff said "But Morgueasm, If I'm back in zombie land I'll have to break in to be w/you... to nibble ...Yes to nibble. Hmmm to just be in your presence or to await that moment of nibbling..,. AGHHH I can't decide."

but before he could decide, it all ended in tears and shotgun bullets

• Detective Valentine killed feel'nstiff.

Musical Interlude

Even in the midst of siege, the Staff and Fans enjoy a good sing song, holding hands and dancing around a warm, powered generator:

• Cloderic Marquis said " *Start singing* What do we like the most...? Yeah... I heard it in the crowd...La-La-La... Barricading! La-La-La! We use all sort of object like a vending machine... Na-Na-Na... Some broken door! Na-Na-Na...! But yeah!"
• Cloderic Marquis said "What do we do for a living...? Barricading and we all love barricading because it prevents zombies from chomping your head...! Na-Na-Na! *Makes a country solo with a banjo*"

Night Shift

Even the Head Administrator cannot stay awake for all hours and so has to call the Night Shift. But it seems the Staff get up to all sorts of mischief while he's asleep:

• Conrad Bergeshneider said "Hey! Who pinched my ass? Dang generators."
• Doctor567 said "Sorry, i thought you were Ms. Morg, its really hard to see with the lights out..."

Besides groping in the dark, we have occasional shouts from the Fans:

• Thomas Andrews said "Thanks 4 zonbies, also I'm obliged to give a shout out for the DEM (Link in my profile name) Though these MMS folks are goodfellows too."

Usually the more articulate and well-formed the request, the more desperate it is:

• 4 zonbies said "Could someone skilled in the fine art of making piles of junk in front of doors and windows please attend to the barricades? Alas I am able to stack only one small thing on top of another thing and so I am helpless to save us from the baddies."

Getting festive a little too early..?

• GoodAgs said "now 18 zeds outside and 22 bodies"
• OmegaOmnus said "and a partridge in a pear tree"

Ms. Morg is simply irresistible, even to the undead:

• A zombie brought down the last of the barricades.
• A zombie gestured at Morgueasm.
• A zombie gestured at itself.
• A zombie said "Harz an ma!! aaa!!!" ("Hearts on me!! aaa!!!" from when Ms. morg drew hearts on him)

After spending the night installing and refuelling generators, only to have them smashed minutes later, we finally decided to keep with the mood lighting:

• A zombie destroyed the generator.

Save Yourselves!

Though we promote courage and valour, when you wake up one morning to find a horde of 11 zombies hanging around in the building looking for someone to eat, bravery is one of the first things to go out the window:

• Doctor567 said "No zombies! Dont kill me please! I have a wife and 2 childen! Kill them!
• A zombie said "NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA BA MAAAAAAN!"

Tough Justice

Even PK'ers after shooting and killing us actually come back to us and apologise for their bad behaviour:

• Prepuce said "Hello MMS staff. I am happy to see you but the occaision is also embarassing for me. I am deeply ashamed of my beavior and the udeserved maltreatment I gave you. While I realize my humble apology cannot hope to compensate for my actions..."
• Prepuce said "I know that you are good people and of much stronger moral fabric than myself and I hope that you will find it in yourselves to forgive me."
• Prepuce said "While Jallus has taken revenge already, I understand that those of you whom bore the brunt of my insults persoanlly may wish to exact further vengance. I humbly await your reply."

Unfortunately for Prepuce, Ms. Morg's "stronger moral fabric" is made of less forgiving material than her PVC nurse's uniform:

• Morgueasm killed Prepuce. (2 hours and 55 minutes ago)
• Morgueasm said "there's your welcome for our hospitality,Prepuce."

Ready, Steady, COOK!

The MMS come up with an amazingly simple, yet flawless plan to solve the zombie troubles in Malton...

• becrj said "*Yawn* Now that was a nice nap, do I spy old coffee? And what's all this commotion about a kidney?"
• becrj said "Wow, look at all this artwork adorning our halls! It's like a miniature museum, maybe we could charge for membership and tours eventually..."
• Zombie Fetish said "Monde found a kidney in the fridge next to some beer. He asked if it was mine. I said no, but we use it to make kidney pie...ewwwww!"
• Imgonnadiesoon said "What exactly would we charge people to look at some dead animals? A kidney, perhaps?"
• Imgonnadiesoon said "I got it! We can use the kidneys to lure to zombies into the sewers, then we can have the gators deal with them."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Of course if the gators turned into zombies we could have a serious problem on our hands..."
• Zombie Fetish said "Do we just throw all the kidneys into the sewer? That would be weird...walking on kidneys."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Walking on kidneys? That gives me an idea. *Pulls out paper and pen and begins to draw*"
• Zombie Fetish said "If you were to fall into the sewer where there were a bunch of kidneys, it wouldnt really hurt. It would be like landing on a giant sponge cake."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "If we cover ourselves in kidneys the zombies will never be able to reach us. But that's a lot of kidneys. Anyone willing to donate?"
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Giant sponge cake? That would be perfect, zombies hate giant sponge cake! Your brilliant!"
• Zombie Fetish said "Would we tie the kidneys to ourselves? Because that be a problem. If they pull on the kidney they will drag us along with it. Unless the string snaps."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Forget my idea about kidney armor yours is much better! ; )"
• Zombie Fetish said "Me? Brilliant? Awww, thank you!"
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Strings? Who said anything about strings? My armor would be glued to us, after all thiers no reason to take it off, right?"
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Your quite welcome. It takes a true genius to find out the zombies true weakness."
• Zombie Fetish said "Now...we just need a bunch of sponge cakes and we can glue them together and create a GIANT one."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Yeah, I see where your going with this. I have a great recipe and I'm sure we could find some supplies around here somewhere..."
• Zombie Fetish said "Sounds good. What supplies do we need? Oh and if anyone wants to help us make a giant sponge cake, feel free to join in."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Yeah we are gonna need all the help we can get."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Let's see here first were gonna need a lot of ovens."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Cake pans, eggs, sugar, lemon juice, flour and grated lemon grind."
• Imgonnadiesoon said "Do you think the mall will have any of this?"
• Zombie Fetish said "Thats not too much...but it sounds yummalicious."

Centre Stage

The MMS are the most vocal group in Malton, out performing anyone that tries to make a dramatic entrance and steal the spotlight...

• Nellie Harmon said "*hands Bella to Zombie Fetish* i found her searching the ruins of Ethelberts."
• D4rkness said "Dead I am the dog, hound of hell you cry. Devil on your back, I can never die."
• D4rkness killed Kitsune Rikimaru.
• D4rkness destroyed the generator.

Zombie Fetish decides that obviously, the return of her beloved pet is much more important than a griefer running rampant in the building:

• Zombie Fetish said "*screams* BELA!!! Thank you SO much Nellie!! I really appreciate it. *Hugs Nellie and gives her an emergency Twinkie* Sorry I couldnt get you anything better, but I do owe you big time. *takes Bela and pets his soft black fur*"
• Nellie Harmon said "I am going after this guy for GKing" (4 hours and 45 minutes ago)
• D4rkness said "Dammit, don't interrupt my dramatic blather. I'm trying to sew seeds of chaos over here! Jeez, some people..."

Unfortunately, he didn't get to sow his seeds of chaos for very long:

• Hot Action Cop killed D4rkness.

Undead Romance

Someone must have revived feeln'stiff, so he went looking for Ms. Morg at St. Ethelbert's Hospital...

• feel'nstiff said "Well it's been fun nibbling on you guys but I must find orgueasm. O...E...I....U... It's nice to communicate w/more then aaaarrrgghhzzz. Yes! speech is sweet"
• feel'nstiff said "...well as you can see I'm a little rusty @ this. Morg.. MORG Mhhh Mhh m m . I think I got it now."

Unfortunately, she wasn't there, but that wasn't going to stop him. feel'nstiff went to Eligius and found her sleeping...

• feel'nstiff said "*sneaking in he glids on up to Morg and begins nibbling on her ear* Guess who? Sorry, I can't infect you this way, but @ least I smell better then the rotting flesh of a decomposing body. Morgueasm! Forever I'll long for you cause you drew hearts on me."
• feel'nstiff said "Your so tired... *He looks down at her as she sleeps* ... you look so peaceful... like a woman w/out a care. I know that's not true..."
• feel'nstiff said "*he kisses his fingers and gently puts them on her lips* Wish you were awake but I got to go. I'm on a hunt... I'll come back and... I'll come back. *he slips out the cades..leaving a rose by her head*"

We Talk A Lot!

• Sterile tramp said "Damn, you guys talk WAY to much, I gotta find a safe house before my computer crashes."

Twas' the Night Before Christmas

With a beautiful fir covered in twinkling red and white lights and snow drifting from the heavens, it could almost make you forget the zombie apocalypse..almost.

• allenj81 said "Twas' the Night Before Christmas, and all through the Hospital"
• allenj81 said "Not a sound was heard... Not even a grumble"
• allenj81 said "All were happy, filled with joy and cheer. There food, wine, friendship, and Beer"
• allenj81 said "But suddenly, Allen jumped up with a shout, Zombies inside, lets throw them all out!
• allenj81 said "Shotguns blasted, and pistols shot, and the zombies were slain without a thought.
• Imgonnadiesoon said "*Applaudes*"
• allenj81 said "The people were happy, the food wasn't crappy, and with Christmas lights bright..."
• allenj81 said "MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT!"