RRF/Malton Herald & Sun/Text/Text0606left
by Marina
While we've been out on our excursion, spring has come to our homeland, and everywhere you look you can see signs of new beginnings. Free of twisted human ideals of "cultivation," Ridleybank's natural flora and fauna are starting to make a comeback, and our home has never looked more beautiful! Now that we've weathered the harsh Malton winter together, it's time for us to discover the delights that spring has in store for us. Here are some suggestions for making the most of this spring:
When you were out touring Malton, you probably thought fondly of your home from time to time -- but when you returned, the reality might not have measured up to your daydreams. Sadly, many Ridleybank buildings are still plagued with leftover bits of barricades, remnants of past meals and incomprehensible graffiti. So throw open the windows and doors, because it's time for a good, thorough spring cleaning! If you're running low on cleaning supplies, check the warehouses or the storage closet in the Hollbrook motel for some leftovers. Get rid of the grime, and make your home inviting for passing survivors looking for shelter.
Round up your friends and plan a picnic! (Check the end of the article for a refreshing spring recipe.) Dufferin Park is always a favorite, but don't stop there. There are a few picnic tables set up outside Boniface Library and a nice garden outside Buttery Row School. And don't forget the wastelands! They used to be litter-filled eyesores, but now that they're free of human infestations, they're being reclaimed by nature and make excellent picnic destinations.
But don't feel like you're limited to Ridleybank -- make a day trip out of it! Consider hopping over to Whetcombe Park in Stanbury Village and bore the younger zombies with tales of the strike... go old-school with a picnic in one of Roachtown's three cemeteries... or delight the kids with a trip up to the zoo in Ketchelbank!
After your picnic, take a walk and bash down any barricades you see! It's a great way to work off a heavy meal, and it serves the further purpose of beautifying our city. Ridleybank and its surrounding suburbs have some of the finest examples of architecture in all of Malton, and many of our favorite buildings are works of art in and of themselves; they were not designed to have their marvelous doors and windows clogged up with trash! Let some light and air in, and appreciate them as they were meant to be seen.
As you take full advantage of spring in our beloved suburb, take a moment to think about those less fortunate than ourselves. For us, spring is a time for renewal, for trips with our brethren, for lazing outside in the sun... yet most survivors are still stuck behind the same old rotting, creaking barricades, entirely isolated from the fresh air and sunlight. When they do go outside, it's never just to take a refreshing walk or enjoy the scenery, but merely to get from one building to another -- and some survivors have even eliminated the need for that!
"While I was still clinging to that outdated idea of 'surviving,'" confessed one new RRF member, "I could go for weeks, if not months, without setting foot outside. Half a year of it made me so depressed that one day I just snapped and murdered everyone in my safehouse. Now I'm a zombie, I'm making up for lost time by sunbathing out on the top of Wootten Towers every day."
Such reports are neither surprising nor isolated, because not only is a deficiency in vitamin D harmful to physical health, but to mental health as well. "Studies so far have been inconclusive," noted a prominent zombie physician, "but there is some evidence that a lack of vitamin D exacerbates conditions such as depression and seasonal affective disorder, and continual sunlight deprivation may even shrink the brain." He went on to suggest that survivors compensate for this weakness by ingesting at least one tablespoon of cod liver oil per day, or spending at least two hours in direct sunlight, preferably after liberal application of his specially formulated herbal "suntan lotion."
So as you enjoy cracking open your next safehouse or come across a sleepy survivor, just remember to let them know what a huge favor you're doing them. You may even want to invite them to your next picnic!
Beyin Salatasi (Brain Salad)
Preparation time: 30 minutes
Serves eight
(Recipe source: http://www.geocities.com/ftcookery/reci ... latasi.htm)
This exotic, refreshing recipe comes all the way from our brethren in Turkey. Best of all, it's easy to make, even for those of us missing a finger or two. (Young zombies might want to ask their older brothers and sisters with Memories of Life for help removing the membranes.)
1 sprig of parsley
2 tomatoes
2 human brains
4 soup spoons olive oil
a few olives
the juice of one lemon
Soak the brains in cold, salted water for 20 minutes, then remove the membranes that cover them.
Place the brains in cold water to which vinegar and a little salt have been added. Boil for six minutes, counting from the time that small bubbles begin to appear. Let cool in the cooking water. Place the brains on a serving platter. Sprinkle with olive oil and lemon juice. Decorate with parsley and olives.
