Talk:Assault on Stupid Survivors

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hashissiin, you just made a whole bunch of enemies. --Luigi Galleani M(A)C | M(A)F 15:56, 7 June 2007 (BST)

Archived discussions can be found here.

Remember to always sign your messages,
by adding four tildes (~~~~) in the end of your message.



Please leave a link to your profile, your email address, and a brief signed (signature/timestamp) message if you are interested in becoming a member of ASS. If you don't wanna leave this information in a public place, you can E-mail it to us at If you wanna listen to some head-banging rock 'n roll while doing this, feel free. Any questions people thinking of joining have can be left here or E-mailed to us, with or without the info. Got all that? Excellent.

Example User

I've been playing with a character of mine on DvEM and then on the RRF, now he is a survivor and I would like to join the ASSault. My e-mail address is and my in-game profile is this one. Thanks for your time.--Example User 22:25, 30 September 2006 (BST)

New Requests

New requests at the top.


Well, my character NanoReeferAnachronos, would like to join ASS. I'm equally adept in both harman and zed combat, and I hate idiot n00bs (don't have a problem with newbs though) who ruin the game for survivors. I'd look forward to working with you to rid Malton of these idiots, and insulting them while doing it. You can reach me at --Anachronos 15:09, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

Old Requests

Old requests will be relocated here when we get bored of looking at them.

Suggestion for Entertainment

Logans_Run_Challenge Have a look, disseminate it among your members and free lancers... Conndrakamod T CFT 16:46, 17 August 2006 (BST)

Conndraka, kindly take your obnoxious spam elsewhere.--Thom Flask 04:51, 19 August 2006 (BST)


The Philosophe Knights were contacted by Thom Flask to consider future connections with Assault on Stupid Survivors. Seeing as our goals are similar, we see no reason why we should not work with your group. If you wish to coordinate an attack or war please register and contact us on our forum to make arrangments.

"Ignorance, the root and stem of every evil." -Plato Praise Knowledge Flogging Molly 16:36, 21 August 2006 (BST)

Alliance request

THE KleenARMY think that your group can be a great add help our cause :CONTROLING malton cityand we like your way of think so why not join? --Kcold 21:43, 5 October 2006 (BST)


A member of Assault on Stupid Survivors, Canderous Ordo, just killed a RAT operative sleeping alone in an unpowered bank (non-resource) building in Stanbury Village. While RAT is familiar with PKers, it does pain us to see a group stray from it's stated mandate, as this member clearly did in this unprovoked assault. It is something that we trust we will not see from this group again. Yosemite Sam 02:13, 22 August 2006 (BST)

While I'll leave the formal response (if any) to the current leader, I'll note that Canderous is currently going free-lance to pursue his own agenda. If you want to try to prevent future attacks on your members, you'd probably have more success if you approached him directly. --Jimbo Bob ASSU! 02:56, 22 August 2006 (BST)
Sonny has been AWOL for a while, free lancing. You could try asking him on his talk page. There is the possibility that this member of RAT is also on our kill list. I could check whether he is, and why he was put on there. –Xoid STFU! 09:49, 22 August 2006 (BST)

Old Membership Cleanup?

If you want, you can delete my old request for membership so you can free up some room on this page. Just a suggestion though, it's still entirely up to you. --Paradox319 00:07, 25 August 2006 (BST)

Nah. I'm an archivist. When it gets to be too much, I get around to it, or I just plain feel like it, I'll archive it. Until then, I couldn't be bothered. –Xoid STFU! 06:27, 25 August 2006 (BST)


This is sort of like nepotism, given that I founded the damn group, but what the hell:

Trophy.jpg ASS' Bob Award
For being the most popular group on the wiki.

Bob Hammero ModTACB! 23:52, 25 August 2006 (BST)

Is it bad that alot of the links come from our signatures? --A1C JerryASSPKASAT11:19, 27 August 2006 (BST)
No. –Bob Hammero ModB'cratTA 19:40, 27 August 2006 (BST)

How about another?

What the hell. I understand that nepotism is best in pairs.

Trophy.jpg ASS' Second Bob Award
For being the most active group on the wiki.

Bob Hammero ModTACB! 03:28, 26 August 2006 (BST)

The Red God's Proposition

We of the Disciples of Zeko admire your work in slaying the stupid of Malton. Our very own god once championed this very cause before he ascended into godhood by killing those he regarded as stupidly named or just annoying. We lend our support to your cause and have a favor of you to ask. The Whatmore building as you may or may not know is holy ground to us after the Valentine's Day Massacre took place, and unfortunatly this very building is currently in possession of the YRC and The Abandoned. We only ask for you to drop by every now and then and take a couple a couple of insignificant lives with you, and there's no need to declare it in our name. Wether or not you decide to do this we support your cause and hope you take many lives to come. In the eye's of Zeko murder is blessed, and every killing is a prayer in his name. Amen.

Nomination for ASSing

Dead VS Blue, due to the fact that they are zerging dipshits, and this post just proves their level of rampant stupidity. -- Flareblade77 (Unsigned, I know.)

THE STALLONES. Everyone is allowed to PK them at this point and not get on the list. - Tryce of Thunder 15:27, 30 September 2006 (BST)


I most certainly am not stupid, i have an I.Q. of 130... so there :P --DJSMITHCDF 16:11, 21 September 2006 (BST)

"i have I.Q. of 130" ...Ah, sweet irony. --Jimbo Bob ASSU! 05:07, 22 September 2006 (BST)
relax, i had been up for 10 minutes when I wrote that... --DJSMITHCDF 15:09, 24 September 2006 (BST)
Then don't wiki in a tired state. --CaptainM 20:09, 24 September 2006 (BST)
"i had been up for 10 minutes when I wrote that" And that? Anyway, I'm perfectly relaxed. I just find it amusing that you failed to apply a very basic rule of grammar while bragging about your intelligence. --Jimbo Bob ASSU! 03:53, 25 September 2006 (BST)
If you'll notice in the history, I corrected another grammatorical error I made, so atleast I tried to correct myself... --DJSMITHCDF 15:04, 25 September 2006 (BST)
Whups! Another slipup by the 130-genius. Dang! I guess my little old IQ of...167...doesn't account for much at all, then. Right? Cyberbob  Talk  15:08, 25 September 2006 (BST)
Cyberbob240, watch your comma use. DJSMITH, ignore the ASS because everyone in that organization are stupider than we are by taking upon intellegence generalizations. They PK scientists without realizing that scientists are supposed to be roleplaying the intellectual elite in this game. They PKed me even though I am not unintelligent in real life, so you are not alone. Also, the ASS Wiki mentions "unproductive idiots" when in fact the most productive are usually the so called "idiots," or has no one ever hear of the uneducated working class? So sorry for maundering on and on, but kudos to anyone who spots the two gramatical or usage errors in the text that I have just typed. --Wikidead *:)#< !% OCTOBER @))^ (PST) (DECIPHER THIS< IT"S EASY!)
You've rather more than two in there, "friend". And the most glaring of your errors are when you claim not to be stupid, and when you assume we care enough about you to do any more than give you the brush-off. --Jimbo Bob ASSU! 03:45, 17 October 2006 (BST)
Don't forget the pickup of my "mistake"! Cyberbob  Talk  07:36, 17 October 2006 (BST)
Jimbo Bob, "friend", tell me these extraneous grammatical "errors" you've picked up, and I'll tell you the errors you've just left behind in your comment (well, actually, you only have one error in your comment). However, you are correct in that there is an error in when I claimed not to be stupid, but it is certainly not a "glaring" error. I deliberately inserted it in there for irony purposes, andto see if anyone here is smart enough to pick it up (it is one of the two errors I referenced to: the usage error). Cyberbob240, you still have not found your comma error yet? I've also made another set of errors (hint:one of them a comma error) in this passage as a test for you ASS members to find (consider it a test). Sincerely, Max Leibniz, Ph.D (phony doctor) --Wikidead *:)#< !% OCTOBER @))^ (PST) Three more notes: First, what is your opinions on the PKing of scientists? Or do you all forget that scientists are roleplaying as intelligent people? Second, addressing to CyberBob240, in your hasty sarcasm that I "for[got] the pickup of [your] 'mistake,'" you've added an insult to your injury of standardized English. Third, to Jimbo Bob, if you was (hint: error alert) wonderin' (hint: usage alert), I use Websterian English, not UK Standard English, like the rest of this Wiki (hint: grammer and usage error alert). I put in the error alerts to help you spot some clues, not that you need any help, "friend."
Leibniz? I would like to tell you personally that I hate your notation style sir!--Gage 01:00, 18 October 2006 (BST)
Major Gage, what could you possibly hate about Leibniz notation? It's easy and fun to use! Well, I guess some people prefer the other notations (they confuse people less by avoiding some outdated concepts)... Anyhow, I am not Gottfried Leibniz himself (obviously), but actually a distant realtive. --Wikidead Too Tired to Date Entry Even If This Gives Others Reasons to Remove It (I'm trying to be funny, but I don't think its (hint: error alert!) working.)
O RLY? I know where you might have thought there was a mistake, but it isn't one. Commas are pretty flexible things, doncha know. Cyberbob  Talk  08:21, 18 October 2006 (BST)
Commas are not as flexible as you may think, "doncha know." "O RLY..." Maxie 01:18, 19 October 2006 (BST)

Enough. Here are six from your earlier edit:

  • "…ignore the ASS because…" — I could go either way with screaming "error!" on this one. We are both "an assault on stupid survivors" (the collective grouping of all groups fighting the ongoing war against stupid survivors) and "Assault on Stupid Survivors" (this group). You definitely could've worded it better. I'm not I not surprised you left an ambiguity in there. Trying to make us slip up, Wikidead? While I am giving you the benefit of the doubt on this one, common usage would dictate that "…ignore the ASS because…" is incorrect. Of course, you could've been trying to be punny.
  • "…organization are stupider…" — Should've been "is".
  • "…by taking upon intellegence generalizations." — Jesus Christ. You could not have worded that any more poorly, even if you tried to. I can only surmise you're attempting to give me an aneurysm trying to run that abortion through my head.
  • …ASS Wiki…" — Imbecile. It's not "the ASS Wiki", it's "ASS' wiki page", "ASS' page", "the ASS wiki page" or "the ASS page". Get. It. Right. For the record; it's "wiki" with a lowercase "w". The Urban Dead Wiki is a proper noun. Wikipedia is a proper noun. Wiki is not a proper noun and should not be capitalised without good reason.
  • "…or has no one ever hear of…" — Should've been "heard".
  • "…IT"S…" — Should've been "IT'S".

Here are a couple from your latter edit:

  • "…andto…" — In English, we usually put a space between words. Yes, I can nitpick too.
  • "…Bob, if you was wonderin'…" — Should've been "were".
  • "…its…" — Should've been "it's".
  • "…wonderin' (hint: usage alert)…" — Now that's not a grammatical error, fool. You are supposed to use an apostrophe in place of missing letters in a contraction.

How about some spelling errors, for good measure?

  • "gramatical" — Should've been grammatical.
  • "grammer" — Should've been grammar.

That conversion you asked for:

  • *:)#< !% OCTOBER @))^ (PST)8:03 15 OCTOBER 2006
Interestingly enough, your second post used the exact same "time" as the first one. Too lazy to post properly? Of course.

"…the most productive are usually the so called 'idiots,'…" — Uneducated does not mean "idiotic". Education is no substitute for experience; someone who has never been educated, but both intelligent and wise, is not "idiotic" by any stretch of the imagination.

  1. I seriously thought that even the dimmest players would've figured out that ASS is not about roleplaying, but it seems I've (yet again) thought too highly of Malton's survivors.
  2. He was deliberately using the comma to indicate a pause, numbnuts.
  3. There are a number of different opinions when it comes to which form of grammar is the most "correct". Some (maybe most) people prefer to include periods inside quotations (e.g., "correct". would be written "correct."). I strongly prefer the period outside of the quotation marks; I am not going to introduce punctuation into a quote just to satisfy the rest of the world. Honestly, that rule pisses me off. It's like "french spacing" versus regular spacing (more so, in fact); a pointless debate that will be won by non-traditionalists due to technical constraints. It's simply too much fuss to code around this common grammatical error; too many special circumstances to take into account. So this "error" is becoming increasingly ignored as computers become more prevalent. This is only one example of deliberate grammatical errors and there are plenty more where that came from. There are even more when different schools of thought conflict. Unless it's glaringly obvious, fuck off and stop wasting our time.

Xoid STFU! 11:42, 18 October 2006 (BST)

Xoid, you know nothing about Websterian English, do you? Nor (do not comment on the nor, I know it is wrong) do you understand humor, do you? I could write another whole paragraph arguing my point, but perhaps you would all hate me more for that and try to get me banned from the Wiki. Your improper attacks on me and your profanity ("fuck off and stop wasting our time") make me feel unwanted... Would you like me to leave you alone and give you some quiet time? If you would like me to continue with arguing (pointing our your errors and justifying mine), let me know. If not , go ahead and delete this whole conversation from the discussion page (no one will care, and this nightmare will end). By the way, you are too suspicious in thinking that I would deliberately insert grammatical errors and ambiguity to "make [you] slip up." However, I did deliberately put in the incorrect subject-verb agreement and tense errors as my "intentional errors." I used the term "intelligence generalizations" to allude to Freudian psychology (I have a reason). AS (intentional) for "ASS Wiki," I will capitalize Wiki because Websterian English does not forbid it. Then we get to the spelling and "andto" error; it is "okay" to make typos (either way, they are not grammatical). Can you say you've never made typos before? "Wonderin'" is not a grammatical error, but I never said it was a grammatical error; it is only a breach of convention. Why did I use "IT"S" instead of IT'S? Reflect on that and, if you are really as smart as you imply you are, you will figure it out. I congratulate you for noticing that I put the same date for two different entries; apparently, someone has too much time on his/her hands (I and you; oh no, another error). As for your remark about punctuation marks inside quotations, I agree with you, but I will "nitpick" your organization to my heart's content. Yes, education and idiot have no direct realtionship with each other, but perhaps the fact that I succeeded in making you admit that... No, I was not trying to fool you into "slipping up;" I was merely luckly that you fooled yourself. Oh look, I did write a paragraph... --Wikidead 01:18, 19 October 2006 (BST) I would also like to add that if you are not a roleplaying group, what justification do you have to PK people? Can you infer a person's intelligence merely from their character name and profile? How do you know if a person you are PKing is truly a "stupid survivor?" (Pointless as it may be to bring this up because your Wiki (fine, if you're not happy with me capitalizing Wiki, edit my text yourself!) states that one of goals of ASS is to use the "word" "ASS" as much as possible, but the name "stupid survivors" itself implies a roleplaying group.) Three final notes: DJSMITH did not hire me to annoy you, I did not write this in paragraph form to frustrate you, and if you cannot deal with "stupid people" in real life, then why are you still alive (tolerate others instead of stigmatizing "idiots" as "unworthy" of life as you may one day meet an elitist smarter than you are who is supercilious towards your "meager brain.") Sincerely, Your New Foe With a Happy Face =) (Once again, another note: this paragraph has just justified all of the errors you have mentioned except one, and, as long as you continue to attack me, you give me opportunities to laugh at your errors (I need a hobby).)

Perhaps I wasn't clear in my previous message, but what I meant to say is that I forfeit this grammar flame war. However, do not beam in your pyrrhic victory (I call it pyrrhic because we have gained nothing through this but lost valuable time and maturity), as you have not won a battle of wits but a battle of endurace and bureaucracy (yes, I know Xoid is a bureaucrat, so he's the only one allowed to do a victory dance, ha ha). The reason behind my giving up is that I am facing alone against three Urban Dead Wiki moderators. Moderators obviously have more time than I do and have the power to ban people (I can fight against one moderator, but considering that I have a history of falling into the displeasure of Wiki admins, I cannot fight against many). So, no hard feelings, okay? (Please don't shout sentance fragment.) Now if you truly believe you have just won a war of intelligence, I congratulate you; you, as not one person but a group, just defeated a sixteen-year-old (you have to admit that, for a child, I put up a good fight; please don't ask if I do or do not have a social life). I bid you a joyful dues ex machina (I've always wanted to use that phrase). --Wikidead 01:08, 20 October 2006 (BST) One last note: If you're wondering why I said I was "Max Leibniz, Ph.D," but now say I am a minor, I was kidding about the Ph.D (I wanted to make the phony doctor joke; yes, I know I have a terrible sense of humor). However, I am a relative of Leibniz, but only distant, so please don't chastize at me about how much you hate his notation (I'm only sixteen, so don't).

Honestly? If we're coming from different schools of thought on grammar, why am I going to fight on your terms when you're not only on our home turf but also in the minority? Illogical, at best. With the exception of the "IT"S" thing, the rest of your argument then falls flat. I had considered it a possibility that you were still "encoding" at that point, but I assumed you stopped when "(PST)" came up instead of "9PST0". As to your most recent edit? Pissing off an admin is rarely a smart idea on any site, but you've nothing to worry from me; this has alternated between mildly irritating to mildly enjoyable (a chance to flex the ol' gray matter). Apart from your name sharing a superficial resemblance to an adbot we dealt with a while back, I am indifferent to you. The only other comment I feel the need to make was on your "Moderators obviously have more time than I do…" quip; a hearty "no duh" to you; we wouldn't have the job if we did not have time to waste on it. Now this may or may not insult you, but you do remind me of myself. You've wasted time talking with "the big boys" in an ultimately unimportant philosophical exercise when you likely have more pressing concerns (like finishing your schooling). Who knows? You may end up an admin somewhere eventually. –Xoid STFU! 03:54, 21 October 2006 (BST)
Yes, I know I've wasted my time on something ultimately unimportant, that fighting a grammar war on off my "turf" was a bad idea, and that moderators would not have their jobs if they didn't have the time. However, if I hadn't wasted my time on this, I would have wasted my time on something else. I'm glad I had the chance to "flex [your] ol' gray matter," as often that is what I end up doing whenever I pick a "flame war" with someone. So, sorry for the waste of time, and, no, I do not find it insulting that I remind you of yourself (though perhaps slightly disturbing because I pride myself on being different). --Wikidead 16:59, 21 October 2006 (BST) P.S: Adbot? I might remind you of an adbot, but surely I am not an adbot (or any other computer program).
"Wikicade" and "Wikidead". Adbot is probably a misnomer, if it was an adbot it was smarter than most people I know. Trying to pass off an advertisement as a group? Brilliant. Since the bugger was both persistent and advertising its site the term adbot seemed to fit better than vandal. Your name showed up red-linked and on the recent changes log not long after it got banned (around the same time of day (s)he/it/whatever showed up as well) which is why you remind me of… uh, whatever it was. –Xoid STFU! 17:53, 21 October 2006 (BST)
Yeah, this is why we all heart you guys. =) –Faerin 01:46, 22 October 2006 (BST)
I see... --Wikidead 06:34, 22 October 2006 (BST)

Other PKer groups :D

Comboing forces is also picking a fight with crossman areaish survivors. Maybe an alliance could help us kill more retards? Get back to us at [1] —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Metro scout (talkcontribs) at an unknown time.

Recruitment Ad

Be advised your ad is about to expire and will be deleted by wedensday if the timestamp is not updated. Thank you. Conndrakamod T CFT 17:06, 25 September 2006 (BST)

Updated by Mr. Cyberbob.--Thari TжFedCom is BFI! 17:22, 25 September 2006 (BST)
Sure was. :D Cyberbob  Talk  17:24, 25 September 2006 (BST)

Cybele's Children Says Hello!

On behalf of all of the Children, I would like to extend a hearty hello. So hello from all 1 of us!  :) I hope that one day we may meet and work together... Either that, or you avoid taking me out. I'm just a simple psychiatrist trying to advance the presence of women in Malton.
It seems I have a lot of greeting to do, so I may talk to you all later. Until then, *nods her head* Torec T 20:19, 8 November 2006 (UTC)

Shacknews wants you!

Hey doodz. As you may know, Shacknews has decided to have one last hurrah at Giddings Mall. We could really use you guys there, doing your anti-materiel thing. Any help you can provide would be greatly appreciated. Leave a message on my talk page if you're interested. Thanks! --New Coldness 01:44, 12 December 2006 (UTC)

ASS not what it should be.

Normally I'm not for PKer groups (actually I despise them), but ASS seems to have a pretty sensible and extremely needed mission in this monument to community stupidity that is known as the internet. Reading the article I thought, "Hmm, well, these guys seem to actually have some common sense." However, looking at your "Enemies" page I discovered that about 100% of your future targets are people that have killed members of your group. I thought I would see something like: "Fucking Retard243- for spamming 'Penis boobs testicles' on important radio frequencies every chance he gets." or "StupidIdiot12- for constantly killing zombies in cemetaries for no reason at all and spraypianting 'Penis boobs testicles' over many revive point directions". Instead I see stuff like "RandomDude14- for killing Whoever(x2), one of our important members, for 'no reason at all'". That really pissed me off. Appaerntly this is just a group that does nothing but whine about people killing thier characters. Hell, I'd like to see a "BlahBlah45- just for the hell of it, he's so fucking stupid" entry than what I saw. Here's some advice: if you're going to call your group "Assault on Stupid Survivors", then make sure they're actually stupid instead of whining about people killing your characters. This is a game where people are killed. That's what happens. Deal with it.

Add that to your fucking list.

-One very pissed off Jordan Salafack

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