Talk:The Malton Mirror/Archive

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SA Article Reader Reactions

I like how you whine about how SA is making the game challenging for you. If they're such a huge bunch of "retarded children", as you so eloquently put it, it should be no problem at all to defend against them. River tactics, right? A real zombie apocalypse would have zombies outnumbering survivors 80-20. The odds, as they stand now, are roughly 50-50, and that's the highest they've been in months. Plenty of room for you to make a stand, and plenty of survivors you can rally to your cause. This is, of course, assuming that you don't freak out and barricade everything up to EHB. Whoops, a little too late for that.

The zombies didn't whine when it cost them XP to be headshot. They didn't put up idiotic newspapers calling the more numerous survivors "retarded children" when they were outnumbered 4-1. They simply roamed around in the spirit of Barhah, eating everything they could. And they had fun doing it! A fun game, go figure! When the odds turn against you, when strategic nerfs make it harder to defend buildings, you don't adapt. You don't put together bands to better secure neighborhoods. You don't work on comprehensive strategies. You put up articles whining about how the game is so easily broken by legitimate recruiting drives, by legions of "dumb and hateful" enemies. If the only acceptable outcome for you is the status quo as of three months ago, you need to find a new place to RP. This is a zombie survival MMORPG. Go out there and survive. If you can't cut it, you deserve to get dragged out and munched on. Maybe then you'll have more time to write these articles. --Kingofallpie 23:36, 4 March 2008 (UTC)

I think he's a lost cause. He's been playing this thing for so long I think he's forgotten even its original intent. Even right now he's probably planning on how to recapture a certain 'suburb' instead of thinking about his group's survival. Those who can't adapt, fade into nothingness.--ScoobyDooDoobie 02:34, 5 March 2008 (UTC)

Your newspaper wreaks of yellow-journalism and partiality. I, for one, am canceling my subscription. Furthermore, Something Awful never does anything "for the lulz", as doing anything for that reason would get you banned in their community for being an idiot. I look forward to the day when I can once again read your paper without it having sacrificed its journalistic integrity. --ExtraNoise 16:21, 5 March 2008 (UTC)

[Uncontrolled Laughter] I'm sorry... too good... this article is not about Urban Dead's balance issues... it is about the group currently entering the scene... and SA is not a bunch of retarded children, just the excessively rude griefers... [snicker] that is an actual quote from the SL w-hats when ever they are asked... [lmao] --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 21:45, 14 March 2008 (UTC)

"[Uncontrolled Laughter][snicker][Uncontrolled Laughter][snicker]" And you wonder why everyone thinks you're a joke.--ScoobyDooDoobie 22:29, 14 March 2008 (UTC)
[GIANT LMAO] Wow... you finally realized it? Dude, this is a fictional newspaper covering a video game apocalypse a-la zombie... how is it not all one giant laugh fest? --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 12:27, 15 March 2008 (UTC)
Who's talking about your garbage paper? It's just us and you, useless. How's that cognitive dissonance treating you?--ScoobyDooDoobie 17:53, 15 March 2008 (UTC)
Rather bad... mostly because I'm having to deal with you guys mucking up my time ingame... You know what I had to do today? I actually did something productive! do you know how crappy that felt? I'm becoming a productive member of society because of you all... I don't think I can handle it man!!! I'm freaking out!!!!! aaaaaaahhhhh!!! my head is spinning... (So awesome XD | Btw: moving this to the talk page... getting too long...) --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 20:00, 16 March 2008 (UTC)

This is a brilliant piece of work. I believe I can actually taste your tears of despair as you vent your impotent rage toward us. Mmmmm, delicious! Is there perhaps an archives where one can browse past issues? I would love to see your report on the Desk Sgt. issue. --John Fraker 20:47, 16 March 2008 (UTC)

Impotent Rage? you guys really think I'm mad? you really think the guys in the DHPD are mad? dude... you've got it all wrong if you think thats the case... some of us are a little ticked we haven't gotten our suburb back; but for that first time in a long time the DHPD has an enemy that is worth the effort we put in... some enemy we can really struggle against and have to work to overcome... the DHPD will be around even after Urban Dead goes kaput; we could care less, we'll just move on to another game when UD is gone... as for me, I'm loving this, though I could do without the wikidrama; you guys just aren't willing to be cool, you try to make it personal... it is not going to happen guys... nobody in their right state of mind will get enraged by (mostly)anonymous text. Anyway; while I value the time you put in to respond to my article, this has been my final word on the matter; Have a nice life guys, see you in game and I assume you'll want final word to give me snappy comeback so fire away... --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 23:51, 16 March 2008 (UTC)
Your blind devotion to a failed group is truly touching. Do you really think your superpals will still hang out with you if UD goes down? I'm going to go with probably not on that. --Laughing Man 16:47, 17 March 2008 (UTC)
This guy's hilarious. The DHPD has had an enemy to fight against for years! You've failed to even hold on to ONE suburb, your own suburb, and now you're going on about how you finally have an enemy? You've failed for years at your stated purpose. The DHPD is not relevant. --Kingofallpie 16:04, 23 March 2008 (UTC)

The amount effort you put into your 'comebacks' is only shadowed by your desperation to be cool on a free browser game. Truly the territory that even the Warcraft fruitcakes don't dare enter. Good work on still being impotent after failing to take your suburb away from disorganized ferals. We aren't even there.--ScoobyDooDoobie 04:33, 17 March 2008 (UTC)

awesome... --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 06:41, 17 March 2008 (UTC)
More like owned. GG, We need more Overlords.--ScoobyDooDoobie 16:18, 17 March 2008 (UTC)

Extinction Accusation Discussion

"My Fellow DHPDers, Allies and Friends

It was bad enough that Survivors were Nerf-ed by the Majority of the updates over the last year...

It's Bad enough that Zeds have been immune to most of Kevan's anti-zerging measures while legitimate players operating out of universities have been pwned...

It's Bad enough that cheaters like Max can get away with Zerging their asses off while people like Me, DHG, Ron Burgundy and any other survivor leader that puts together good ops gets tagged as a Zerg...

Now, Extinction is using automated techniques and tactics to maintain control of NTs and other resource buildings...

I have purposefully been silent for a while because I just haven't had the heart to deal with this BULLSHIT with all the personal crap that has gone on in my life over the last 6 mos, but I have been playing... And I even orchestrated a number of people who had given up the game to come back to play for a bit to see if a difference could be made...

It is obvious the game has been broken by a number of enterprising individuals, and unless serious changes are made to the current Status quo, things are not going to get any better....


I, and anyone I can convince should cease and desist all activities ASAP.

I don't have any problem getting beat in a game fairly but there seems to be serious activities that have taken survivors off the same scale as Zombies some time ago... I f Kevan wants to save this game he's going to have to do some serious rework of the mechanics and stiffen the anti-zerg measures to stop manipulators like Max and his ilk from exploiting the system...

I remain in Service Conndraka Commissioner Emeritus"

This was the statement Issued by Conndraka this morning via radio. --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 20:55, 17 March 2007 (UTC)

Retrieved from ""

He isn't talking to Extinction because its BULLSHIT??? Your right this is bullshit!!! Its you trying to blame all this Bullshit on me!!! You can take your false accusations and shove them up your ass!!! The game is over, bla bla bla, you pull all this shit on my Team for bad press ??? "No i just want everyone to see the truth"... BULLSHIT... you have accusations, you have NO proff, you think using BOTs is my "plan" to take over Malton ?? Your 110% Wrong.--Brainz 11:20, 22 March 2007 (UTC)

You wouldn't be freaking out and overreacting like this unless you were trying to protect something... I'm going to find out what that is... even if it's not exactly what Conndraka says it is... and I'm pretty sure it is because i've talked this over with certain "parties" --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 17:51, 22 March 2007 (UTC)

Just because your slightly pissing me off im going to take your Nts out with my army of BOTs now...j/k.--Brainz 20:44, 22 March 2007 (UTC)