User:Alexander Karelin

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I - Alexander Karelin! I make MUCH ZOMBIE SMASH! Know that I, Alexander Karelin much like for PKer hunt. This - picture me, rocking shit of foolish man.

FEAR ME! I make much zombie smash with the TEAM ZOMBIE HARDCORE. KNOW THIS: I make kill your face if you cross the TZH.


Biography

Alexander Karelin lived for eons in the center of the earth, beating everyone up and taking everyone's money all the time. Then one day some one pointed at a guy standing next to Karelin and said something about a "sissy boy". Karelin, in a fit of rage grabbed the poor fool and suplexed him into the upper crust of the earth, shattering it. This killed all of the dinosaurs. Karelin,then burst forth, suplexing every large dinosaur he could find into the growing pile of dead suplexed dinosaurs that lay upon the crumpled heap of a man who probably never pointed at him anyway.

Karelin then wandered the shattered earth for eons, gradually decreasing in anger but never in strength. Deciding that the center of the earth was for stooges and lame-ohs Karelin stayed on the surface, and watched the rise of mankind, and later the rise of zombies. Finally, something that sucked hard enough that he felt good about thrashing whenever he wanted too... which was always.

Karelin spent his early days in Malton eating cement, and suplexing buildings into zombies, finding it much more fun than suplexing zombies into buildings, even though both are equally devastating to said zombie.

It is widely known that Alexander Karelin is the strongest being in the universe. He has many children by many beautiful wives. His children include: Thor, the Hulk, Ayers Rock, the Planet Venus and Duke Cage's left boot.

Illustrations below:

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The Dinosaurs were unavailable for comment, because they were all totally shit rocked. However, this dramatic reenactment is believed by most scientists to be an accurate representation of how it went down.

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Leader of TZH College of Suplex.

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