User:Amazing/SysOp Bid

Just a few random ideas I'm working on for my eventual SysOp promotion bid. This is a work in progress.

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1. Throw off spambots by editing login page to require a definition of "love".
2. Retroactively give self ability to edit login page.
3. Require retina scan on login.
4. Require voice recognition for the eyeless.
5. Get to the bottom of how eyeless people are finding the site, much less using it.
6. Deletion of all wiki content so we can "start fresh" and "get it right this time".
7. Ensure that the new UDWiki makes absolutely no mention of zombies.
8. Every wiki page made better with photograph of Amazing.
9. Universal healthcare.
10. Put a halt to the secret, widespread SysOp behavior of collecting personal data and using it to rent "Weekend and Bernie's" on VHS.
11. "Recent Changes" to simply read "Who fucking cares?"
12. Improperly indenting a reply will cause your brain to hemorrhage uncontrollably until you correct the error or the condition becomes fatal.
13. Change Kevan's userpage from "A transient formation of smaller particles." to one of the following...

    "A transient formation of discarded testicles."

    "A transient vagabond on a quest for justice."

    "A soiled collection of Playboy articles."

    "A sweet Transvestite from Transsexual, Transylvannia."

    "A series of tubes."

    "Farty McBritish."

    "DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK GRAAGHS"

14. Change "Play Urban Dead" link to "Be Subjected to Urban Dead".
15. Promote Katthew to "Secretery of Defenestration".
16. Promote Zod Rhombus to "Vice Beardo".
17. Promote Grim S to "Ambassador to Doucheland".
18. Find evidence against the notion that subconscious sexism is the reason Katthew is the only one listed as a "Secretary".
19. Extend UDWiki guidelines to cover the entirity of the internet.
20. If you find the Schmoo, you win a prize.
21. Change signature image size limit to 2000 x 1400, minimum.
22. New suggestion voting options - Keep, Kill, or Hell Rising has that.
23. Replace SysOp activity tracking with "Working hard, or hardly working?"
24. Give SysOp status to permabanned users.
25. Give permabans to all current SysOps.
26. Attract all the boys to the yard by employing some sort of device created specifically for shaking milk.
27. Add new feature beside "Watch this page", titled "Watch this page do it with another chick".
28. Block access to all outside the United States, including the server itself.
29. Settle Copyright issues once and for all by annhiliating the human race in a nuclear holocaust.