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I am le bored, so I play Urban Dead.


I am le addicted, so I have four characters. Bite them.

Ekashp Policeman, Member of The Uncyclopedian Forces
DerScout Member of The Hard Corps
DahSoldiah A Zombie-Solder! BARHAH!
AhhChuu A medic with an eternal cold.

If you happen to revive my zombie alt(s), don't be alarmed - I play as a human while I'm alive. If you kill one of my Survivor characters, you're getting black-listed, though. Expect a shotgun blast if you meet me on the street, buddy.


I do not PK, except against a known PKer. I know that this makes me a known PKer, but they killed an innocent. I'm just here to serve justice Judge Dredd-style. Similarly, I do not ZK except in retaliation to known ZKers, for the same reasons.

I do not GK, except in Non-Resource EHB Safehouses, which are graffiti'ed as being "Lights OFF!". I believe that having the lights turned on attracts zombies. As such, I have had to destroy a few generators, for the common good. I have never, and will never kill a generator in a resource building or building not marked as being "Lights OFF". That is being an asshole. Which I am not.

I tip cows. No, not those cows. Mrh? Cows. If you are going to just stand around and wait for a revive, you obviously have some extra AP floating around, and can afford to stand back up. Besides, while you're dead, why not take this opportunity to enjoy life as a zombie? I do everytime I die. Then somebody revives me, and I'm human again. Repeat ad infinitum. This means that I will use all of the syringes I can, if I'm going reviving. This also means I will use all of the ammo I have, if I'm going Cow Tipping. It's a fun sport, honest.

I do show restraint in my Cow Tipping, however. I do believe in Sacred Ground, and thus do not kill zeds at Cemetaries. Except those with brain-rot. They're fair game.

I like the Taste of BRA!NZ!!! I will play as a zombie if I'm dead, especially if it's against the best interests of humans. Deal with it. It's a zombie apocolypse, zeds have a right to un-death, too. Besides, have you ever tried brains? They're really rather good.

Please also note that all of these principles and ethics can be backed up with a valid Role-Playing explanation, so I'm not a complete fuckwit. I'm just too lazy to explain any more.


I at least try to follow the following policies, if I don't happen to be lying down or headshotted. Whereupon I get VERY ANGRY.

General Policies

Dual nature.JPG Dual Nature
This User or Group supports the Dual Nature Policy & believes that the citizens of Malton should embrace their two-fold nature.
Banana.gif Real Gamer is an Asshole
This user or group believes that Real Gamer is a n00b, a loser, an asshole, as well as a host of unspeakable things.

He deserves to die by being stuffed with bananas in his ass. Or worse...

Human Policies

Ubpicon1.gif Uniform Barricading Policy Supporter
This User or Group supports the Uniform Barricading Policy by actively maintaining barricades according to local plan or UBP standard.
Sgpicon1.gif Sacred Ground Policy Supporter
This user or group supports the Sacred Ground Policy and acknowledges that all Cemeteries in the city of Malton are considered Revivification Points.
Cowtipper.jpg Cow Tipper
This user is a Cow tipper and treats marked revive points as they would a cattle ranch. They particularly enjoy shooting zombie-cows with their buddies.
Rogers.jpg Mr. Rogers Style!
This user or group plays as Mr. Rogers would. They are non-violent as long as there is peace. Start something, however, and expect the wrath of Mr. Rogers and his whole neighborhood.

Zombie Policies

Ubpicon2.GIF Non-Barricading Policy
This user or group complies with the Non Barricading Policy, which states that all buildings shall be barricade-free, ruined, and un-lit.
Brainz.gif maarh harman bra!nz ahr har!!
This user or group is a fan of feasting on harman bra!nz, and wants more opened.
Gargoyle.jpg Profane Existence Policy Supporter
This User or Group supports the Profane Existence Policy & asserts that all Wastelands in the city of Malton are revive-free zombie zones.