User:Jon Pyre

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Hello, and welcome to my page! I'm a longtime reporter for Channel 4 News, perhaps you recognize me from my weekly investigative feature "I've Got You Now!". In the last video segment of "I've Got You Now!" I confronted a bunch of moaning vagrants with video evidence of their breaking and entering, assault, and cannabalism. When a wagged finger, even a raised eyebrow failed to shame them I pulled out my trusty shotgun "Pulitzer Betty". The rest is history.

Trident.jpg Channel 4 News Team Affiliate
This user or group entered Glorious Battle beside the Channel 4 News Team. There were horses and a man on fire and this user or group killed a guy with a trident. Afterward, we could barely lift our arms because we killed so many zombies. I don't know if you heard us counting. We killed over 1,000.

I've Got You Now! PKER LIST

HydraDefense.jpg Cut Off My Head, I Dare You!
This user or group supports the Hydra Defense in order to stamp out PKing in Malton.

While reporting in combat zones I personally spotted these fiends committing various murderous acts. Feel free to kill on sight and not revive. Add them to your contacts for easy spotting. Insulting their mothers is also appropriate. They deserve it for breaking genre (which they might not agree with but generally in zombie movies the roving murderous gangs can't just backflip into your dwelling)!

If you want to give me a reason to take you off this list please call my tip line at 1800-Reformed or leave a message on my talk page.

All People too Cowardly to List A PKer Group

Gay FedCom President (lists FedCom but is a PKer)
psychostress
SillyLiIlyPilIy
Suburban Ed (posing as Creedy Defense Force)

Creedy Guerilla Raiders

hewoman

Crimson Chardonnay (red rum knockoff)

Evillic

Cult of the Fallen God

Senister
Zephyer

Fazed

Big Hungry Joe

Flowers of Disease

Almighty Power
Bootsy Funk
Bruha
Chansama
Daisy Pusher
hibernaculum (group name not listed)
Kalenium
Karth Salvage
Pierre Crowe
Rob Kollick
Skilbey

Lebende Tote

voodoojuice

Lotus Kids

Strata

Maltonian Inquisition

Anthony Jackson
Fisu
Machos Nachos
will ingham

Murderer

Secruss (he asked me to add him to this list and I was happy to comply)

Murder for Hire

Deathlicious

Phil's Freaks

psychedelicphil

Philosophe Knights

Knightmoner

Sociopath Apostles

Rajko (erased group name to go undercover)
Young Bambi Killer
ZombiesAren'tDumb

The Brotherhood of the Reckoning

Owchies

The Shining Ones

Maxime

Undeadites

Creeping Crud

Zombie Inc.

Azog

Suggestions

I'm pretty active on the suggestions page and you can blame a few things on me (at least the basic idea and sometimes the whole thing):

  • Feeding Groan
  • Scent Death
  • Seeing Lit Buildings From Adjacent Blocks
  • Knives becoming better for newbies
  • Being able to see who killed a person or broke a generator
  • DNA Extractors giving you profile links
  • Bodies Getting Dumped One At A Time
  • Survivors Getting A Helpful Message The First Time They Die
  • Being able to tell if a Feeding Groan is from a group member
  • Radios
  • Radio Operation

and probably more!

Exclusive Interviews

More journalism than you can shake a stick at!

bullgod interview

I had the good fortune of encountering Feral Undead founder bullgod in the Malcolm NT in Whiitenside. He was in human form at the time so I figured it was a ripe opportunity to learn about his innovative zombie group. He was killed shortly after this interview and infected me but I got some quality reportage done before that point!

JP: bullgod! Wow, if you don't mind could I interview you for Chanel Four News Team! This story is just what I need for Mr. Burgandy to give me that promotion to understudy anchor!

BG: well iv actually given an interview to your station before, but that was another time. id be glad to shoot the breeze with you Jon.

JP: bullgod, what are you doing in human form in a Necrotech? Do you often spend time in human form? When you're a human do you play the human side or still serve the zombie cause?

BG: well it was another tragic case of combat revive, i suppose i could avoid it by getting rot, but i wouldn't want to miss out. ive spent some time in human form, alto this is the first in many months, and since my rise to fame its getting harder and harder to stay alive once revived. i am a fan of the dual nature policy, but my human nature happens to be a generator smashing occasional murderer so i don't think it makes much of a difference to the other humans.

JP: You run an interesting group, designed to give zombies without a group an umbrella organization that requires little commitment. How do you think your mission is going? What is your long term plan? What's a feral zombie's biggest obstacle?

BG: i think its going very well, and the game statistics seem to be backing me up to this point. i never really had a long term plan for the group, just to make information and assistance readily available to our members. i think the only real problem of being a feral is the fact that most of the work we do is on our own, we seldom use attack times and prefer to just log in when we feel like it. in some ways this hurts us as a group because we could be much more threatening than we are now, but that would mean losing the aspect that this is just a game, and we should just log in to have fun whenever it's convenient for us.

JP: How heavily do your coordinate or manage your group. You're the founder, but do you still retain power or are you a figurehead? How does your balance the paradox of being feral but following a leader?

BG: well i wont deny that people do listen to me, ive been playing for a while and usually know what's going on, but from the beginning the Feral Undead has been democratic. we pitch ideas around until we come up with one a majority of us like. you wouldn't believe how many are rejected. to put it simply they don't follow me, because im really just a feral like them. sometimes i can be found with them attacking a building like i am today and other days i may just wander off to god knows where.

JP: Is your group targeting Fort Perryn now or are you here mostly as an invidiual? If the latter what is your purpose?

BG: yes we are targeting the fort in a generally unorganized fashion. we have claimed ownership of Fort Feral we moved to whittenside so long ago, only the more recent changes make it more difficult to hold on to than it used to be, top that off with it now being full of small time trenchie paramilitary groups and that just makes things harder. luckily we are a patient bunch, we've taken the fort several times before and its only a matter of time before it falls again.

JP: What was your childhood like? What inspired you to found your group? Were you ever a member of any more traditional zombie organization?

BG: my early days as a youngling were hard, i didn't even see a human until my third week, but i did see the headshots they gave me. this was back before headshots were modified so they no longer rob you of your XP. it was only when i discovered the wiki that i found i was in the wrong area for killing and started to lurch my way down to ridleybank. on the way i learned a strike was forming to protest headshots and decided to Stanstock. to date the only groups i have been a member of were On Strike and the Feral Udead.

JP:What is your one biggest peeve about Urban Dead? What do you like most about it?

BG: oh i love so many things about this game just as it is now. im always a bit peeved about how hard it is for young zombies to level up, and of course ive never liked how there are more humans playing than there are zombies, it doesn't seem right. if new players just gave zombies a chance instead of rushing off to go be a gun wielding fireman they might see that its a lot more fun than it looks.

JP: What is your favorite food? Prepared cusine or living human? Any exciting developments you would like to announce? Please say anything you like.

BG: babies. tasty tasty babies. its like eating veal, the head even has a soft spot to make getting at the brain easier. and the bones are so small you can just chew them up. nothing waisted. as far as announcements its been known among my group for a long time that im working out of state right now and infact ive only been playing the game again for 2-3 weeks again after about a six month sabbatical, ive only been home trying to get a loan and sort out some tax stuff but when i get the money im going right back to the job site, likely for at least another month or two.

JP: Finally, George Bush - Great President or the Greatest President

BG: bush is my least favorite kind of human, violent with no brains.


Glorious Battle

I participated in both glorious Caiger Mall sieges, and in the somewhat less glorious third siege. If you were there the third time you might have heard me shouting "Don't hide in the mall you cowardly bastards! Up and attem! To the Herman Necrotech!" I woke up the next morning outside the Herman Building.

Investigative Journalism

I'm always looking for bright eyed associates to help with my documentaries. If you're interesting in teaming up and joining in on some nefarious (but still heroic) plans for making Malton a safer place leave a message on my contact page. Stick with me champ, I'll get you that emmy.

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