User:Sarah Silverman/Archive

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Where are you?

Hey what happened to you visiting the hospital? I'm starting to feel unloved. I'm waiting in the Mall for you

Kiss Kiss, Chill 03:12, 20 February 2008 (UTC)

Suggestions for my 100th Kill go under HERE

Name your target! Also, please give me a location, or if it's you, tell me where you'll be during a specific several-hour window of time.

Kiss kiss!

  1. Target Zombie. No comment (Location starts with a T).
  1. Me lol. real life stressed me out so I want to be undead for awhile. Ya know where I'll be.--Dragon fang 04:28, 5 January 2008 (UTC)

Thanks guys - I decided it's time to kill some bounty hunters instead. I didn't want to repeat on my 100th, either. I appreciate your interest!--Sarah Silverman 17:01, 7 January 2008 (UTC)

  • Congrats--Dragon fang 20:49, 7 January 2008 (UTC)
  • Yes, Congratulations on 100 kills! Here's to you committing 100's more! --Canker Sore|CK | GC | ZHU | MEM | 10:43, 10 January 2008 (GMT)

My starting-to-grow-repetitive conversation with Dragon Fang

Dragon Fang looks a little confused...

I find it odd that you guys say you don't use alts and stuff yet ya have a complete record of afew zed attacks on st alex when you guys aren't around. unless ya hired someone to bother us ya make it seem like ya zerg. not saying ya do, just how it looks. And heres hoping that strike won't last long. You guys need work too afterall.--Dragon fang 07:17, 9 November 2007 (UTC)

Dear Mr. Radio Repairman - again you really underestimate how many people - even outside the LNTVC - mock your group. Check the witness logs - you can get most of it there! Others share stuff with us all the time! Good samaritans heal us, revive us, saying "Keep up the good work!" "Give those idiots hell!" and things like that.

Seriously - as long as Rika is 6 moves SW in the Bank from Izumi in St. Alex, I'll entertain no more questions of zerging nonsense. Also FireACE, FireCHIEF and FireCHICK can all be found within 10 moves of each other regularly. SO honestly Radar O'Reilly - enough with the zerging nonsense if you want me to keep responding to you. How about you just stand there politely while we shoot you. I'll let you know if I need my radio fixed. --Sarah Silverman 12:42, 9 November 2007 (UTC)

LOL i've been called worse. And just to state, i've never belived ya zerg. it would show in your attacks. never meant trouble with my posts. and the main reason i fixed the radio was i was low on hp,infected and on my last ap. rather get the exp and use it for a zed skill then die from an infection. to be honest, while i do think you izumi and both groups are well doing people off game all the back and forth "they zerg, no they zerg" has worn my nerves out. i'll still be friends with them, i won't join you (no offence but i don't like pk'ing unless they really piss me off) but i'm dropping out of this mess. rather be friends and kill zeds then stand and be bored. again, srry if i said ya zerg. this little war is over for me. though if i see ya as a zed i will bite back. heres hoping me and you guys can make human to human peace.--Dragon fang 03:34, 11 November 2007 (UTC)

Just want to wish you a merry christmas Sarah.--Dragon fang 00:10, 14 December 2007 (UTC)

Izumi isn't going to be on the game for awhile right now do to alot of real life stuff, even if ya haven't killed her in awhile lol.--Dragon fang 20:52, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
Lies! Izumi is planning something sinister! +1 --  AHLGTG 21:33, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
O RLY? LIER! We must rebel against this panic monger! Not One Step Back, Comrades!-- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 21:37, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
Har! You side with mudkipz, traitor! Death for you!--  AHLGTG 21:39, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
Kay.... I'm late. What now?--SeventythreeTalk 22:04, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
What? Are you siding with Engel? --  AHLGTG 22:09, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
No, I was calling the guy who said Izumi is gone a liar. Duh! We is on teh same sidez!-- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 22:11, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
No you're not.--SeventythreeTalk 22:12, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
Yous is both trying to trick me! --  AHLGTG 22:52, 14 December 2007 (UTC)
You know what? Whatever. I really don't care right now. Sorry, but I'm out of here. I have work to do. :/ -- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 22:54, 14 December 2007 (UTC)

i'm in her group on the game. she is indeed gone. her body is outside st alex if ya want to keep tabs to see her idle out. and you should have used my talk page instead of spaming sarahs. ask around st alex in lockettside. everyone there heard her saying she was leaving for awhile. and izumi hasn't bugged the wiki in months. srry for this mess sarah.--Dragon fang 05:43, 15 December 2007 (UTC)

We wouldn't use your talk page for one reason, and one reason only. We're all compulsive spammers. We do it to have fun, and hope others have fun in the process. And I'm sure Sarah will enjoy seeing this little fight between us. :) -- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 05:55, 15 December 2007 (UTC)
The body must be fake! I see through your deceptions, Dragon fang!--  AHLGTG 17:05, 15 December 2007 (UTC)
Of course it's fake! No women would willingly wear bright red lipstick! Everyone knows it'd make themselves look like a clown!-- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 18:28, 15 December 2007 (UTC)

Well fuck the world then lol. I'm not her keeper--Dragon fang 04:15, 16 December 2007 (UTC)

Look at you guys go! Well, I'll certainly miss killing Zoomy if she is in fact gone for a bit. I wonder if Rika less than half a burb away will also time out? Sweet Hikari in Dulston? Time will tell. Besides, I'm actually hot for these Doctors McDreamy from Tikhon Medical who keep killing me. They've really got my attention much more than you all in Soap Opera hospital for the time being. What is it with you Florence Nightengale types and the hypocrisy? "We're hear to heal Malton.. and kill female comedians!" Well, turnabout and kiss kiss!--Sarah Silverman 21:26, 17 December 2007 (UTC)
Unfortunately, one of your cohorts stepped on a Cheesy Poof after killing two of our staff. Big, big trouble you are all in.--  AHLGTG 23:03, 17 December 2007 (UTC)
Wait, she stepped on a Poof, so you attack her? I stepped on a Poof. How come I don't get any punishment?!? I demand punishment!-- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 23:19, 17 December 2007 (UTC)
No Colbert did. Celebrity Poof murder is serious business. Regardless... your punishment will come soon and sudden (I planted a bomb in him, just don't tell him that, mmkay?) --  AHLGTG 23:26, 17 December 2007 (UTC)

Dare I ask where in him since he likes to stop by St Ales right now lol. BTW Sarah, idk when Izumi will be completely gone. I know shes not on anywhere close to how much she normally is but she stills comes on right now. And once again to you and Gnome and Angel merry x-mas--Dragon fang 02:57, 18 December 2007 (UTC)

And now he offends my religion with his insults? Blasphemy! You and your band of warriors shall feel my wrath!(Just kidding. Merry Christmas to you and everyone else too. And if someone doesn't celebrate Christmas, then substitute your holiday for it.)-- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 03:04, 18 December 2007 (UTC)

Oh now you're going to get it! --  AHLGTG 18:49, 18 December 2007 (UTC)

I noticed your dead body one move from mine this morning. You wouldn't be zerging to find me would you? Uncanny how close you were able to come in one day!--Sarah Silverman 15:41, 19 December 2007 (UTC)
No, friends + forum > than zerg. I'm not supposed to tell you this, it's on the non-hidden section on our forum anyways, but we literally have the entire SW on the hunt for you. I got PKed, I think (he gave no reason). Might have been a bounty, meh. --  AHLGTG 18:31, 19 December 2007 (UTC)
I'm flattered. Well, you can just wait at Tikhon General and we'll come to you soon enough!  :)--Sarah Silverman 18:36, 19 December 2007 (UTC)
(marks another day off the calendar) Maybe... this year? - elbert gray 22:26, 1 February 2008 (UTC)

To Dragon Fang: Your leader isn't taking a break either from zerging or from the game. Lookee here from recent activity at the Cheeke building (three moves from St. Alexander's):

  1. Rika Nonaka killed Falcon Talon. (10 hours and 40 minutes ago)
  2. Rika Nonaka said "Falcon Talon is a PKing asshole. Don't revive him." (10 hours and 38 minutes ago)

Such language and such zerging! It almost makes me want to forget killing at Tikhon Medical and head back up to see Zoomy! But NO! Tikhon General Hospital here I come! Working on a coordinated LNTVC strike! FEAR US Doctors McDreamy!!--Sarah Silverman 16:21, 19 December 2007 (UTC)

I walked in on that. In retrospect i should have done something. If Rika's still there (doubt it) I'll empty my guns on her. I'm staying with the valks but Izumi's non-stop *they are zerging* when she herself does it is pissing me off.--Dragon fang 19:55, 19 December 2007 (UTC)

My mistake. I don't hate PKing or anything, I have one of my very own. You could call Target Zombie a killjoy, I suppose. --  AHLGTG 00:10, 5 January 2008 (UTC)

Still not like me? --  AHLGTG 21:41, 17 January 2008 (UTC)

What do you mean? I'd execute you same as you'd kill me in the game, and Tikhon is up next after the Writer's Strike, but you personally? I have no beef with you!--Sarah Silverman 21:47, 17 January 2008 (UTC)
Oh it was just that comment on my talk page. Good luck with Tikhon, though I must admit you're quite outnumbered. --  AHLGTG 21:52, 17 January 2008 (UTC)
Your talk page? I didn't put anything on your talk page? Unless you are that cold sweat guy who's taken an in-game issue with TZH to arby?--Sarah Silverman 21:55, 17 January 2008 (UTC)
No, I'm A Helpful Little Gnome, not the cold sweat guy. The comment has long since been archived, I think. --  AHLGTG 22:02, 17 January 2008 (UTC)

Left a request on ya group page--Dragon fang 05:21, 27 February 2008 (UTC)

Colbert has balls for doing his work while a shit load of zeds are trying ta kill him. Still want ya guys ta come back. once the zeds leave its gonna get dull again.--Dragon fang 05:47, 9 March 2008 (UTC)
I do have one thing, and that's balls. I always enjoy having an audience while I work, and the zeds seemed like a nice change from the typical crowd of sleepers. Although, they were a little bitey, I kept right at my work. --Stephen Colbert DFA 14:51, 10 March 2008 (UTC)

My Gift to you

Check the bottom of the page!

Oh,and have fun telling the Psyops about this.... The procedding has been brought to you by Chill at 22:48, 17 November 2007 (UTC).


I just really wish he'd remove that stuff. It's really unneeded.-- dǝǝɥs ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 17:26, 18 November 2007 (UTC)


Wow. So there I was, in Roftwood for the most part, then Pitneybank, happily collecting bounties, slowly getting pushed northwestward by an alt & said alt's group, & I eventually run across An enormous baby!! I said to myself, "Like, omfg! Wtf is LNTVC doing wayyyyyy up here!??!?!" Nobody answered. So I killed the baby. I then hung around for most of the next day, assuming that even you people wouldn't leave that baby in a weird 'burb all by it's lonesome, & what do I find? YOU! YAY! But where's Stephen? Anyhow, it was nice seeing you again! Have fun w/ whatever it is that you're up to! --Manteiv 03:40, 24 November 2007 (GMT)

Dear Sarah

Dear Sarah,

I'm concerned. You see, just the other day, I was told where you were and realized that I was near-by. Oh what joy I felt when I realized that I could come say hello to you. I traveled across a suburb to reach you and when I finally got there you were asleep! Boy how angry was I! In my upset and angry state I killed you. Anyway, I was told that my name now appeared on your wiki page under the list of people who you have killed. At first, I was delighted to see my name in the sixty-seventh slot, oh how famous was I now! But that was before I realized that you haven't killed me! Not even once. So what is my name doing on the list?

Sincerely, Confused reader.--Chase G 00:48, 29 December 2007 (UTC)

Oh, my bad then - I have a 'system' for keeping track of who I've killed, and it got a little discombobulated with the craze of all my traveling around, the holidays and what-not. I must have been about to kill you? YOu killed me? Something? You were definitely added in such a way as I MEANT to kill you if you say I didn't actually. Of course I will take your word for it, and move your name to the top of my own "Must Visit Soon" list. Kindly provide your most recent location for me, and I'll be glad to come fix this issue. In the meantime, sincere thanks for pointing out my error. I hope there are no others! They would be few if there are.--Sarah Silverman 00:53, 29 December 2007 (UTC)
I understand how things can get carried away from time to time. Keep that sixty-seventh slot open for me! I-I've grown kind of fond of it. We'll be seeing each other very soon I'm sure.-- Chase G 01:04, 29 December 2007 (UTC)
Well, I've figured out what went wrong now. It was you who killed me on my way to the Silent Night Slaughter. I added you to my contacts thinking, "Oh I'll get that guy after I head home from this little PK'er outing I'm on." I just was too busy at the time for petty vendettas. Sadly I didn't change the color to my "Get this guy later color" and I mistook you for a victim when I was sifting through all my holiday killing. Thank goodness for iWitness! It tells one so much! There, clear as day is your PK of me - I suppose you would call it a 'bounty' yet you hunted and killed a human nonetheless which makes us more alike than not - it also tells me you're buddies with that whole Tikhon medical crowd that needs a bit of attention from us, and that you frequently hang out in buildings with the zerger Rikia Nonaka/ Izumi Orimoto. So now I've judged you by the company you keep, and I'm all the more motivated, and know where to look! Yay! Kiss kiss Chase!--Sarah Silverman 13:00, 29 December 2007 (UTC)
Oh and double thanks Chase! You made me go back through all my iWitness accounts - I'm so bad at remembering - there were a bunch of kills I hadn't given myself credit for! Just 10 kills from 100!!! And my RG bounty is still at 2! LOL - what a useless tool that is!! Kiss kiss!--Sarah Silverman 17:15, 29 December 2007 (UTC)
Haha! Sorry Sarah, I don't keep up with the wiki that much but the recent historic nominations caught my attention while I was coming on here to look over some things and the LNTVC was on the page! Anyway, Long story short, I came back here to see how you were doing. Boy oh boy but you've been busy lately. All over the map--killing and slaughtering the innocent all the while. Ahh good times... I wouldn't exactly call my killing of you a bounty. It was more of a PK I suppose. Just a whim really! I'm sure you know all about those. So we could be considered more alike than not, but not too much alike. Honestly, I've been considering whether or not I should try out this PKing path. I think I might be fun! I will admit that I did camp out down near those Tikhon guys but calling us "buddies" is a bit of a stretch. I was further away from that zerger girl than you give me credit for! I hope you'll reconsider judging me by this company that I don't keep. But I'm not trying to unmotivate you. I'm sure one of these days you'll catch up with me and boy will that be a spectacular day for me!
Yours truly, from your biggest fan,--Chase G 01:14, 5 February 2008 (UTC)
Let me know if you are looking to become a PK'er. We've got a casting couch that won't hurt a bit.--Sarah Silverman 19:45, 14 February 2008 (UTC)
You know what, I think I'll take you up on that. If you're serious, that is. I've never had a PK character. It could be fun.--Chase G 20:59, 14 February 2008 (UTC)
I signed up with Chase G, but I have a different character if you'd rather I use someone else. He's currently lvl. 2 but he'll grow fast.--Chase G 23:27, 15 February 2008 (UTC)
Chase - so sorry! I'll go look at that board. I've been fucking Matt Damon, and I've just come up for air.--Sarah Silverman 22:30, 7 March 2008 (UTC)

Miss Silverman

Miss Silverman,

Sorry for killing you last November. You see, I do my best to persuade celebrities and other undesirables to leave Malton. In my experience, the celebrities stuck in Malton still act like prima donnas: expecting special treatment, carrying on, whining about the plight of misunderstood zombies, et cetera. In general, I've found the local celebrities just as bothersome as these ridiculous local militias.

At the time I was unaware of your many wonderful contributions to post-Quarantine Malton. I only knew you as the "Raving Bitch" in The Way of the Gun and as a guest star from the awful Star Trek: Voyager. I salute your efforts and your body of work since being trapped in Malton. Had I known your value to the city, I would have moved along.

As you are a heavily-armed sociopath, I do not intend to search for you. But if our paths cross again, I shall raise a toast.


Celebrity Hunter 14:19, 10 January 2008 (UTC)

Well Celebrity Hunter your courtesy knows no bounds! Of course of the two of us here, I am the one who has dined on the high-velocity lead sandwich. Well, I guess I have to walk the honor among thieves policy as I've talked it... so no worries. Death is so temporary in Malton anyway, isn't it? As one interested in the affairs of Celebrities, I hope you'll support the Writer's Strike by punching a member of Team Zombie Hardcore in the face whenever you see one. Actually - they have several celebrities among their number as well - many from the former Nixon administration. Do look them up, will you? Kiss kiss!--Sarah Silverman 22:20, 10 January 2008 (UTC)

Yes, the Team Zombie Hardcore. A partner of yours, I believe, made me aware of those wretched vulgarians. You Americans use the term, "tools" for such people, I think? I kindly showed two of them my disapproval some days ago. Sadly, the celebrity members of their militia were nowhere to be seen when I first paid them a visit and when I came by again, they were ransacked, zombified, and I think shellshocked by somebody's rendition of "The Sounds of Silence". I hear that Katie Holmes was spotted at Caiger Mall so I will be heading northwards and thus, through TZH territory very soon. I'll give them your kindest regards.--Celebrity Hunter 14:06, 11 January 2008 (UTC)

I apologize again, Miss Silverman. You asked me to punch a member of that vulgar and foul-mouthed militia in the face. I shot their leader dead and was so excited to bag both a celebrity and a useless NED, that I completely forgot to punch him. I guess I'll have to go back and get him again. Regards, --Celebrity Hunter 14:46, 25 January 2008 (UTC)


If you'll look... I admitted I had no authority over in-game... and it was a RECOMMENDATION, not a ruling.  Nalikill  TALK  E!  W!  M!  USAI  23:30, 17 January 2008 (UTC)

Nali, it was a joke. Much like taking an in-game feud to wiki arbitration is a joke. I can't believe you're even indulging this nonsense. I'm going to mock this relentlessly, as it is well deserving. This provides endless material for the writer's strike.--Sarah Silverman 23:36, 17 January 2008 (UTC)
Hey thanks for the backing on the wiki arbitration Sarah haha! Never thought we would get help from you guys. Seriously though, if you could be more aggressive, and emphasize more how you guys follow the "honor among thieves" policy... you know, making the fact that you are hunting us MORE evidence that we aren't a "hostile group" haha! BALLS TO THE WHALLS! --Dhavid Grohl 23:58, 17 January 2008 (UTC)
Honestly Dhave, we started this because you guys seemed like you'd be easy to annoy and vocal in your response - and boy have you come through!! We even brought Papa Nixon out of retirement!!! I gotta post his kill of me later... So, I really can't speak any further to the intentions of TZH. To do that would be to legitimize the kangaroo court. I will repeat as often as is appropriate that this bit has no place on the wiki.--Sarah Silverman 00:23, 18 January 2008 (UTC)
i would also like to pile on and thank you for being fair to us. i might even feel bad if i find you and take revenge for my previous death (number 104), but probably not Scotw 00:06, 18 January 2008 (UTC)
Scot! Did my killing you incite you to join TZH? As I recall, you weren't a member before I killed you. Did I make a beautiful marriage between you and Dhave's minions?--Sarah Silverman 00:13, 18 January 2008 (UTC)
i have been a member of TZH since april or may, my duties include being the administrator/creator of our forum. it is funny you say that because you posted this for me before/after my death
You say "Scot - until Team Zombie Hardcore stops representing the fat cats at the movie and TV studios, the Writer's Strike will continue. It's time to return to the negotiating table - the people want their entertainment. Take this message to your superiors..." Scotw 00:26, 18 January 2008 (UTC)
Huh, I guess I was wrong. Didn't mean anything by it. I honestly thought I was killing an innocent when I got you. Whew! I'm glad I got a true believer instead! Praise Paulie Walnuts or whomever it is you thank!! Kiss kiss!--Sarah Silverman 00:29, 18 January 2008 (UTC)

Writers strike

Sarah, my dear Sarah, I'll be perfectly blunt. We at the BBC have run out of fresh stories, and I'd like to know if your writers strike is still on?--Normal PhobicC 16:31, 20 February 2008 (UTC)

It's not - we won a negotiated agreement. Honestly, everyone started to jump on the "grief TZH" bandwagon (Red Rum, The Philosophe Knights, and others...) that TZH scurried into hidey holes so widespread that it stopped being fun. They should change their group slogan to "Balls to the HILLS!" - we had a great time with them though. I still think Alexander Karellin should be their new leader.
As for things worthy of reporting - well, we started to take on Tikhon Medical for malpractice on our various plastic surgeries, but that fizzled a bit. They didn't really fight back, and we got busy (again, the whole Matt Damon and me fucking him thing). We're working on a new campaign - I'll share it with you when it comes together, and see if that interests you. --Sarah Silverman 22:30, 7 March 2008 (UTC)
That's be great, thanks for taking the time to respond--Normal PhobicC 11:15, 15 March 2008 (UTC)


Miss Silverman,

Would you care to comment on the recent proof of some most disturbing behaviour on your part?

-- Iscariot 00:10, 28 February 2008 (UTC)

hahahaha, nice black tie by the way, makes you look even more like a man --Scotw 00:22, 28 February 2008 (UTC)

Sorry!! - I've been active in the game but unable to stop by here recently. Fucking Matt Damon has been taking all my time. What was that link?--Sarah Silverman 22:26, 7 March 2008 (UTC)
Bloody Youtube! It was a copy of your own confession. - Iscariot 22:37, 7 March 2008 (UTC)

Re: Your shit

Your personal shit goes in your own userspace and it has been moved. If you remove the link or change the link from your ... page to link to that instead, ill happily delete the old page away. --The Grimch U! E! 17:15, 21 July 2008 (BST)

Huh, I'm working on a new page for my main page in the background - I'm sure you could see it. Not sure what I messed up - but sorry. Plan is to put it all up on the main page of my user page when I've got it pretty. Sorry Grimmy - can you explain what I did wrong in more pedestrian terminology?--Sarah Silverman 17:18, 21 July 2008 (BST)
I just moved it to the main user page so I don't make any more mistakes like that. Feel free to delete/clean up any messes I made. Sorry to make work for you - again if you explain what I did, I'll never to it again, you handsome devil you! Kiss kiss!--Sarah Silverman 17:21, 21 July 2008 (BST)

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