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Ah, hello there. I didn't see you come in. No, there's nobody else in this safehouse, just me. I guess you can say I've made it home over the last few days. I apologize, I don't have a generator or fuel, but there's a little fire burning in the old trash can over here. Come over and warm yourself.

How's that? Better?

Name's Vandr, by the way. What's yours?

You look cold, stranger. The fire not enough? I've got a coat if you'd like it. No? You sure? Well, all right then.

What's that? My eye? Oh, I lost it, 'bout three years back. Well, I guess I shouldn't say I lost it. Zombie took it, back when Nichols Mall fell for what must've been the umpteenth time. Killed me too, actually, but them Necrotechs brought me back. Guess they can't do nothing for my eye, though. Does it bother you? You can't really see it if I wear my fedora and pull the brim down low... There. How's that? Better?


Heh, it's a long story. I was a firefighter back before the Outbreak. I still have my axe, see? Like a keepsake, though shotguns are more effective. But anyway. I remember when folks started getting infected, and people started getting torn apart in the streets. I tried to light out for the country. Figured less people meant less zombies. But no, they locked the city down. Quarantine. Left us here to fight for our lives, fight against the dead themselves.

We started putting barricades together, making safehouses, or holing up in malls. I was there at Caiger--the first time, I mean--when we finally threw the zombie hordes back. I served in other malls too, served in Nichols, and Dowdney, and others. I spent a hellish couple of months keeping one step ahead of the Mall Tour. I remember crying when I realized I had spent a whole year under quarantine: and then one year become two...

The old gray gallows-god.

Then something strange happened. You might think me crazy for this, but I've been killed and revived many times--bless those scientists--and the time I lost my eye was different. I remember dying. And I remember someone came to me after I died. An old man, with a long spear and two ravens sitting on his shoulder. He told me many things, things I don't rightly understand. Things about death, and old gods, and wisdom. I really wish I could remember everything he said.

And then, well, I was revived. And I knew what I had to do.

I started small. I saw a survivor out on the street with a pistol in each hand, hunting for zombies. I said hello, tipped my hat to him, waited until he had passed. I remember how easily my axe tore through his rib cage, little bones popping like balsa wood. He hardly made a sound.

Sometimes I would wait until I was alone in a safehouse with someone. Sometimes I'd use my axe, and sometimes a gun would be quicker. Sometimes I'd make it look like an accident, and sometimes I would claim that they had tried to kill me. Whatever I needed to do.

Don't look so frightened, stranger. Sit back down.

It's a sacrifice, see? A sacrifice of life. The old gray gallows-god, he will fight on our side, if only we will sacrifice to him. With every survivor I throw to the zombies, he will grow stronger. I will grow stronger.

No, don't bother. I locked the doors as soon as you came in.

The gods must be appeased.

Awards, Affiliations, and all that Jazz

Cemetery stones 2.jpg PK Count
Vandr has PKed 233 people.
WPKUsmall.jpg WPKU
The latest news. The hottest music. The exclusive "interviews" you've been waiting for. This user is a broadcaster for WPKU. WPKU: Because PKers need entertainment too!

(For a complete kill list, see User:Vandr/Kills)

MinisterofMisInformation.jpg Ministry of Information
"Lying is forbidden in Iraq. President Saddam Hussein will tolerate nothing but truthfulness as he is a man of great honor and integrity. Everyone is encouraged to speak freely of the truths evidenced in their eyes and hearts."

--Minister al-Sahaf

MMA03.JPG Malton Murder Award Winner
This User or Group came first in their category for a Maltie, as announced to the good citizens of Ackland!
Smartlydressed.jpg Red Rum
Smartly dressed in a dark red tie and wearing a monocle, this user is the epitome of taste, class, and lighthearted homicide, for this user is a member of Red Rum.
Killer.jpg Player Killer
"One kills a man, one is an assassin; one kills millions, one is a conqueror; one kills everybody, one is a god."

This user is a PKer and supports the act of Player Killing.

Ranchsign2.jpg Red Ranch
This fella worked as a wrangler at the Red Ranch, Malton's first indoor shootin' range for PKers. Centrally located in sunny Ridleybank, the Red Ranch caters to your target practice needs!
RadioSurvivorUncleZeddie.JPG Radio Survivor Hunter
This user writes down the clues, follows the trail, and listens to every Radio Survivor broadcast multiple times, because this user is driven by the question...

Who is Uncle Zeddie?

TommyGun2.jpg Tommy Gun
This user gasped in horror on Nov 1 2007, when Eugenie de Franval used the Tommy Gun.
Templar.jpg Siege of Jerusalem
This user slaughtered infidels in a holy cause, when the knights and soldiers of the First Crusade took Caiger Mall Jerusalem
Dkg2.jpg Martial Law
This DK13 member fought to maintain a zombie-spy free zone in SIERRA HOTEL ALPHA KG50, when this user took part in the Operation: 100% Success Rate
Scour.jpg Scour the Earth Actor
This actor played as a Bounty Hunter in the hit blockbuster Scour the Earth, for an action-packed flick full of Trenchcoater-killing goodness
Undercoverbadge2.jpg P.A.N.C.A.K.E. Officer
This user will neither confirm or deny that he/she is actually a PKer in P.A.N.C.A.K.E., a PK group that was formerly the DEM's covert PKer infiltration branch.
Mad Hatter.jpg Dork Farces
"Welcome to my tea party!" "I read Nietzsche and look at Renaissance art!
Award: Sharpshooter
Award: Kill on Sight
Award: 100 Kills
Award: Double Threat
Award: Mall Rat