User talk:Ron Burgundy/archive

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Don't edit this page! This is an archive. If you want to leave a message for Ron Burgundy, go to my talk page, which is here!

The corleone family

dear mr.Burgundy u may not know it, but me and my team has been fighting besides you glourious army for awhile. We wish to ask you, if you would so kindely help us with our new campain. I was recently informed that, several small groups of surviors, were going to invade riddelybank on nov. 5th, 06. After much thought we have decided, in the new ridelybank, our"organization" will add territroy to our exapnding enterprise.If you will send, 100 troops we might stand a chance at winning. I will allow you to think about this and hope for your response. email me at,( sicerely vito the don


Good to know we've got the Malton Mob following us into Glorious Battle! Few, I'm sure, can fight like the Don. To business! Yes, I am familiar with the 5th of November plans and do so want to bring Swift and Hideous Death to our old foes from the first Siege of Caiger Mall. For the moment, however, I can't say I have any idea where the Channel 4 News Team will be in a few months' time and cannot, therefore, make any definite promises.

As for sending 100 men, well 100 is a nice number, but the stats page lists the Channel 4 News Team as having 36, at the moment. We've been more or less constantly growing and I assume our influence extends beyond our membership, but it's really impossible to estimate how many reporters will be on staff by then.

So get back to me when time draws near and, if Odin smiles upon us, many will die. --Ron Burgundy 18:48, 14 April 2006 (BST)

  • Well, I can't say conclusively, but from what I've heard, the Channel 4 News Team has the support of the Emerald Guard. There are various messages being painted on buildings around Dartside that the Emerald Guard has fallen, but I wouldn't believe it for a second. Do I smell a lead? *grins* -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 22:32, 25 April 2006 (BST)
  • With regards to events in Dartside, the RRF has rolled into South Blythville; last I heard, they had demolished the mall and were spreading out into the surrounding suburbs before moving onto another mall. The Emerald Guard is present in Dartside and Greenville to minimize the damage and provide support to the local survivors. And as for supporting the Channel 4 News Team... well... a little bird told me. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 22:50, 25 April 2006 (BST)

we're did you go? you left us, can you give cooridantes of were you left? ~~vito the don~~ I hate to tell you guys but I think Caz of the RRF runs the Emerald Guard. And like 1/2 their members are RRF alts. Sooo...--Mpaturet 05:01, 3 May 2006 (BST)

Oh really? I was told they wanted to help out. Maybe they're just an RRF/survivors on the weekend alternate group. Well, it's not important. Thanks for the heads up, though! I've moved on to low-key buildings around Ackland Mall and we're staying Classy down there! --Ron Burgundy 05:32, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Good sources tell me that less than a quarter of the Emerald Guard actually have RRF alts. I'm fairly certain that you can count on their non-RRF support unless explicitly ordered otherwise by Caz. -Wyn (talk!) 08:20, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Got it. I commented on their wiki page about hearing that they wanted to come down. Caz said I have very big ears and that's the last I heard from 'em. I don't expect they will show up, but we shall see! --Ron Burgundy 13:50, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Busy cleaning up Dartside and Greentown, especially considering the ferals following the RRF around. What a mess. -Wyn (talk!) 15:47, 3 May 2006 (BST)

Confusion Regarding Spam

Oh, I know it is a joke, and it isn't even a bad one (I like it) but that page is a public resource that needs to be concise and to the point (without POV embellishments that would make it flavorful). I hope you understand. By the way, I think what you are doing with this channel 4 news thing is great. --Matthew-Stewart 02:35, 4 Dec 2005 (GMT)

More Confusion Regarding my Being an Idiot


Ron, you already have a User page to describe yourself. Try to refrain from making pages about yourself outside your User page. -- Odd Starter talk | Mod 08:05, 7 Dec 2005 (GMT)


'tis Okay - we expect growing pains from new users. Just remember, that putting stuff on User talk pages means that the user you're trying to reach will get notified when you edit it. The User page is where people typically describe themselves and/or their characters, and they don't get the notification when people edit it. This is why we try not to fly off the handle - people gotta learn this stuff eventually. -- Odd Starter talk | Mod 08:13, 7 Dec 2005 (GMT)

Cell Phone Towers

Hey, I saw that the Channel Four News Team was in charge of the Caiger Mall cell phone towers. Just to let you know: both are out. Couldn't get a signal on either half of the mall. --TheTeeHeeMonster 22:03, 1 Feb 2006 (GMT)

Yeah, I hear ya. Girlfriend broke up with me twice in one week. Problem is we only made up after the first time. --TheTeeHeeMonster 19:18, 3 Feb 2006 (GMT)
Yeah, did it right during midterms, too. She could not have chosen a worse time. --TheTeeHeeMonster 19:29, 3 Feb 2006 (GMT)

Channel 4 News Team Member: Moved from the User Page

Mr. Burgundy, the Crippler, Chris Benoit, has no conch shells handy. He came from Montreal, Quebec, and conches just aren't as common up there as they are in, say, San Diego. However, he does have a cell phone. Provided that the towers are working, you could call the Rabid Wolverine, and help him join your mighty cause.

Confusion Regarding Groan: Moved from the User Page

Hey Ron. Yes I was the Sunnyside who spoke to you earlier. It's true that the zombies have to be inside to growl. However the zombie hoards are currently activly attacking buildings with the primary purpose being to growl. Perhapse they have not come by your offices in particular but if you ever find yourself outside you'll hear hundreds of growls a day from the buildings around Caiger attracting more ferals to the mall. The especially target the the resource buildings, but they'll go after any building in a pinch. That's why it's beleive the only way to stop the influx of zombies is to get people informed to either get into the mall or to head to the west where it's safe until they can get into the mall.

It would not hurt if they were also informed to stay classy. We could always do with more class.

And Again

As for where i got the information on the zombies targeting buildings, I had always suspected they would do it. It's what I would do if I was them. But if you want something more concrete than that, while I can't remember which thread it happened in a couple zombies came by The Mall in the UD forums and started talking about their growlmaggeddon or some such.

For a while it didn't work so well as Zombegeddon had actually cleared out many surrounding buildings so I though we we're good. However I got PKed a couple days ago and heard the hundreds upon hundreds of growls eminating around Malton letting me know that people had moved back in and the zombies were taking advantage of it.

For further evidence consider why else a strike team would breach a building and just growl until killed instead of killing some people.


Hey there. What can you tell me about Scinfaxi real quick? We've got him over in Crossman Grove PD. Ready to terminate but I wasn't clear on what's been going on, specifically. Random PKing? -- Amazing 23:45, 28 February 2006 (GMT)

Okay cool. He's been taken out by a fellow CDF member as I was out of AP. Hopefully he won't be revived too quickly. I was just curious what the deal was, his edits of the wiki page were so damning that it was pretty obvious he was evil -- but I was wondering about his affiliation. -- Amazing 01:49, 1 March 2006 (GMT)


Mr. Burundy,

I would like to offer the Channel 4 News Team an opportunity they might enjoy. In an effort to maintain positive public relations we (TheDunell Hills Police Department) would like to offer you and your people an exclusive, with full access, to cover the DHPD. In addition we will use our extensive communications network to relay your broadcast throuout the DMZ. I invite you to send one or more of your fine investigative reporters to our Communications Department to set you up an office. If you ever have need, we would also be happy to help you relocate your broadcast center to an office complex here in Dunell Hills.

Thank You for your time, and espescially for for your coverage of the events at Caigar. Conndraka 22:23, 5 March 2006 (GMT) 1st Commisioner

Welcome Back Ron. By Full Access, I mean Command Level access on our Forum, and access to any of our "information sources" that might be behind closed doors. We are having a problem with PR, so our best bet is full disclosure of appropriate measure. In addition, Personnel would be available for interview for investigative or puff pieces depending upon your need, as well as your own "Channel" on our Forums. Thanks for your time and interest. Conndraka 01:09, 14 March 2006 (GMT) 1st Commisioner DHPD


To you Ron,

Ok, so I think yesterday I shot you for like the seventh time. I'm sorry Ron, and I'm also sorry for the six times before that. I want to say that no you aren't pompus, and you're not a beardo. I just thought it was REALLY fun to specifically target someone as visible as you. I realize the error of my ways, as I've run into far bigger assholes and beardos in urbandead. From here on out, I won't attempt to harm or bother you in any way. If you want to keep me up as a Burgundy Killer on your list that's fine, as I really have only been killed twice (including the time you shot me) since I started targeting you. I've found an even more appealing target (and one that is actually justified) instead of giving you grief. Also, you have to admit it was pretty damn funny changing the Caiger Mall PK list. If you need any help, or want to pay me back for all those times I shot you, I'll make myself available. Thank you. - Scinfaxi

Reply, if you don't notice it on your usertalk thing

Cool beans, dude. Don't worry about my trying to get you back, or anything. Revenge is for God and children. Good luck hunting someone else and yes, having a Wes Mantooth was pretty entertaining. You stay Classy. --Ron Burgundy 20:19, 13 March 2006 (GMT)


Sorry. I acidently deleted something, and didn't know how to fix it... I feel like such a newb... 343 06:37, 19 March 2006 (GMT)

No Problem

These things happen. Stay Classy! --Ron Burgundy 07:01, 19 March 2006 (GMT)


I'm sorry still... Thanks for understanding Ron. Your really are the best News Anchor in Malton. 343 07:15, 19 March 2006 (GMT)


Chill? Make it out to be a conspiracy. Thats what pulls them in... hehehe Thanks. BTW, could I join somehow? Maybe as a cameraman? I promise not to mess with the teleprompters ever again. If not, just write me a message sometime, its always nice to hear the news... 343 05:00, 21 March 2006 (GMT)


1st Apr 2006 A break in at Caiger Mall has occured and it appears that everone has been bitten by vampires. So much for Mall Tour '06, now we have vampires who can mash through barracades. Fort yourselfs and carry around your garlic. Anyone with a vampire hunter skill "heartshot" can instantly kill a vampire, so save up XP for their next attack. April Fools everyone.

I saw that! April 1st is such a great holiday. --Ron Burgundy 19:44, 1 April 2006 (BST)


I noticed the problem with the general, and congrats. I hate him too... On a more serios note, I have some news to report. At St. Isidore's, I have been healing people, and I have seen an increase in not only break-ins, but also in major PKing. Wes Mantooth must be behind this. BUT ON A MORE SERIOUS NOTE!!! With my other character WAY off in the corner, in the Josephine General Hospital (Wykewood: 11,76), where the RRK is but a crawl away, and I mean that, I heard something. I REALLY heard SOMETHING I heard a helecopter thumping nearby. I didn't get a screenshot, BUT I SWEAR TO GOD, I heard a damn helecopter. In our skys! Ron, this is something BIG, even for a lowly camera person... 343 20:52, 16 April 2006 (BST)

I don't hate The General! I'm Ron Fuckin' Burgundy and I love everyone. In fact, I envy The General. I wish my real life were so easy that a joke on the Internet could ruin my day.

Anyhow, yeah, I heard a helicopter flying over me, too. I thought they stopped the air drops and maybe they did, as I found no box. Damn damn damn, I should have taken a screen shot! This'll go in The News, now that I know I'm not just crazy!

As for St. Isidore's, there's something on the Channel 4 News Team discussion about it, which you can read here[1] and here[2]. There's also a forum for CMS-Meta, talking about turning St. Izzy's into an open revive point, which is here[3].

Caiger Mall Survivors

Not sure if this is important or not, but your post for the Wes Mantooth's Hatchet Men was removed. I sometimes keep an eye on the Caiger Mall Survivors page after I noticed a PKer removed his own profile from the listing. Talk about cheeky. Anywho you might want to take a look and see what they did. --Mobius187 7:19 PM, Mar 20 2006 (EST)


Is there any way to contact you outside of the game? Talos 14:15, 23 March 2006 (GMT)


You can contact me through the wiki, if that counts as outside the game. Otherwise, feel free to email or IM me. I'm and ALeafOfAllColors on AIM. I know what you're thinking and that's right! In the real world, I fancy myself a Dead Head. --Ron Burgundy 22:00, 23 March 2006 (GMT)

Thank's Mr. Burgundy you're such a great guy *tips hat* Talos 14:10, 24 March 2006 (GMT)

Read or Die

Regarding the removal of the Barrville Crusade discussion: Please read my open letter here. --Wilson Webber 22:12, 4 April 2006 (BST)

Moved again!

Hello! i just stumbled upon you while looking trough wiki... I am Sinofdamnation from When you said "stay classy" i was sure who you were--Harbingerofdespair 13:35, 13 April 2006 (BST)

By the Beard of Zeus, who but Ron Burgundy? :D --Ron Burgundy 21:25, 13 April 2006 (BST)


i only hope you know that by not taking the work of other seriously they will most probably not take yours too. --hagnat tw 08:04, 16 April 2006 (BST)

I don't believe I've ever taken the wiki seriously. --Ron Burgundy 08:21, 16 April 2006 (BST)


Do not post delibrate stupidity on the suggestions page. This is your first warning.--The General W! Mod 08:07, 16 April 2006 (BST)

Someone read the suggestions page with less than the utmost sincerity?! Is nothing holy?! --Ron Burgundy 08:21, 16 April 2006 (BST)
Read. The. Rules. The suggestions page is not the place for humor or satire, if you wish to post humerous suggestions then post them on the humerous suggestions page. Sorry if i'm a bit harsh, but everyone is sick to death of "humerous" suggestions.--The General W! Mod 08:44, 16 April 2006 (BST)
Yes, I see that and it confuses me! I don't want to beat a dead horse our sound pretentious, but perhaps everyone's best friend, Epictetus, can help! "With regard to whatever objects either delight the mind, or contribute to use, or are tenderly beloved, remind yourself of what nature they are, beginning with the merest trifles: if you have a favorite cup, that it is but a cup of which you are fond, – for thus, if it is broken, you can bear it; if you embrace your child, or your wife, that you embrace a mortal, – and thus, if either of them dies, you can bear it." Stoicism may be a damn selfish philosophy, but he's got a point. There is perspective. Well, look at me, going on about nothing- and I'm not even drunk anymore! You stay Classy, The General. --Ron Burgundy 18:21, 16 April 2006 (BST)

As a protector of all things inane and semi-humorous, I feel obliged to draw your attention to this. From the Suggestions page:

*'''Humorous''' - If the removed Suggestion is eligible for Spamination,  but is deemed humourous, you '''must''':
*#List the number of '''Spam''' Votes received.
*#State that the ''Suggestion has been deemed humorous''.
*#'''Move''' the Suggestion to the Humorous Suggestions page.
*#'''Link''' to the Suggestion on the Humorous Suggestions page.
*#'''Sign the removal.'''
*#''Be Polite and make no additional comments.''

Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't this seem to suggest that the Suggestions page is, in fact, the place for Humorous suggestions to go? At least originally? Feel free to thank me later for busting out a Cochran on your behalf, Burgundy. --Undeadinator 23:24, 16 April 2006 (BST)

Thanks a bunch! May Odin smile on you and yours. I believe you're right and that had been my understanding originally. I mean, there are two types of humor, absurdity and satire. My suggestions were the former, but with all the reactionary nonsense on the suggestion page, you'd think the latter impossible. I think I'll point this out to the mods. We'll see if they really work for Wes Mantooth or if they've just let their hatred get the better of them! --Ron Burgundy 00:21, 17 April 2006 (BST)
Godspeed, Burgundy. May your sinister viking gods bring your enemies low and your Nielsens high! --Undeadinator 00:40, 17 April 2006 (BST)

Those rules are outdated as humerous suggestions are now no longer welcome on the front page. There was also a vote make suggesting humour/satire a bannable offence, i'm not sure what happened to it so i'm not going to ban you. Anyway, as I can see the rules are a bit confusing, official warning retracted. The unofficial warning remains thought, as I (and the majority of the suggestions page) am sick to death of "humerous" suggestins.--The General W! Mod 10:01, 17 April 2006 (BST)

But the fact remains that that is what the rules say at this time. You can't just say "Oh, I don't like these rules so I'm going to pretend they don't exist!". Don't like them? Put them up for change. --Cyberbob240CDF 10:04, 17 April 2006 (BST)

They were put up for change in that it was suggested that posting delibrate stupidity should be a bannable offense. I'm just going to dig up the vote now.--The General W! Mod 10:07, 17 April 2006 (BST)
The vote isn't the point. What do the rules say? Whether or not the vote was passed, the fact of the matter is that the rules weren't changed. Therefore you HAVE to follow them. --Cyberbob240CDF 10:20, 17 April 2006 (BST)
Following the vote, the rules should have been changed but they weren 't. Anyway, i've retracted the official warning so just leave it. I'll just content myself with spaminating them into oblivion (as per the rules).--The General W! Mod 10:42, 17 April 2006 (BST)
There was a vote to change the rules; the rules should have been changed; the rules were not changed; the rules remain as they are above. The humorous suggestion was in following with the rules above; the warning was unwarranted; the warning was retracted. All is well up to this point, but what is an "unofficial warning" against following a rule that "should have been changed"? What weight does it carry beyond saying I have agitated a moderator? Can I give an unofficial warning? Raise an unofficial question of misconduct? There is no warning- there is no unofficial warning- because I have not offended your rules, I have offended your will. If your "unofficial warning" is in the capacity of a moderator, you have misused your status and that is misconduct of the most unofficial nature. --Ron Burgundy 19:36, 17 April 2006 (BST)
Also, I'd like to direct people to the suggestions talk page[4] and will do the same there. --Ron Burgundy 19:36, 17 April 2006 (BST)
And Spaminating them and sending them into oblivion, might I add, is not "per the rules". Per the rules, you move it to Humorous Suggestions and link. --Undeadinator 20:27, 17 April 2006 (BST)
Indeed so! We should bring back the "Humorous" vote to prevent such misfortune in the future. --Ron Burgundy 21:16, 17 April 2006 (BST)

The "unofficial warning" is in my capacity as a user, it carries no further weight beyound saying that you have agitated me and several other users on the suggestions page. No action will be taken in moderation terms if you ignore the warning, think of it as friendly advice.--The General W! Mod 21:01, 17 April 2006 (BST)

Got it and I will! But I think you and several other users would do well to consider reacting to a few inconsequential lines of text as if they were nothing but a few inconsequential lines of text. That is, when I read something that agitates me, I assume it wasn't intended for me and continue on my way. That said, you stay Classy. --Ron Burgundy 21:16, 17 April 2006 (BST)

Hey Burgundy

You remember that page that you edited two seconds ago? Well so do I. This calls for new suits! --Undeadinator 05:06, 18 April 2006 (BST)

Indeed it does! To the suit store!! And thanks for the help, I'm glad I'm not the only one who is horrified by the deep and hateful seriousness on the wiki. --Ron Burgundy 05:15, 18 April 2006 (BST)
Yarrrr...but, in a smash-bang extravaganza of irony, I don't think that we have him beat anymore, as my cowardly change of vote makes it a 70% keep. Any ideas? --Undeadinator 05:21, 18 April 2006 (BST)
Wait... which page are we talking about? --Ron Burgundy 05:28, 18 April 2006 (BST)
The rule change Velkrin cites, in which I pointed out that he himself had counted the vote a failure. Perhaps I was correct, perhaps not. Check the Talk page where this is all going down for more details: there's a link to the relevant vote in my gloating in the midst of the argument. I don't suppose the glimmering bodice of perfection that is your hair gives you qualifications, as such? --Undeadinator 05:34, 18 April 2006 (BST)
This damned well better work. --Undeadinator 05:39, 18 April 2006 (BST)

Milk Was A Bad Choice

Noticed your patient comment on the YRC mainpage...I couldn't resist the chance to hyperlink this into your comment. Hope you don't mind. :) --MorthBabid 20:22, 19 April 2006 (BST)

Haha, I love it! --Ron Burgundy 21:08, 19 April 2006 (BST)


you forgot to sign one of your votes, I won't say which one... See if you can spot it under a minute!!--Vista W! 21:56, 20 April 2006 (BST)

Gah! My internet isn't that fast!! Hyperlink me? :D --Ron Burgundy 21:59, 20 April 2006 (BST)
Sorry, I misclicked, it was Beauxdeigh, you made the edit after him and signed it properly. My bad..--Vista W! 22:00, 20 April 2006 (BST)
Rock on, my man! Reckon it took me three.  :/ --Ron Burgundy 22:01, 20 April 2006 (BST)
Good enough for a win then, here's an imaginary prize--Vista W! 22:06, 20 April 2006 (BST)

You have the hook up

Dear Mr Burgundy, you seem like a man who knows many important people. I am trying to get onto someone, anyone from the Gingerbread Men. As is known, they are notoriously difficult to discover. It is involving some revive point clashes. perhaps you could give me a name I can talk to directly on thier discussion page. Thank you very much for any help you can give me. Say hello to the Octagon for me. Oh, and delete this entry if you need to when the purpose has been served. Rip purr 10:11, 21 April 2006 (BST)

Sorry, man, I don't know The Gingerbread Men. You could try asking at the RRF. I know the two groups have fought each other from time to time, so the RRF may have some information. Also, if you look at the Gingerbread Men wiki page's history, the only two people who have edited it since the editing sweep are G026r and Xoid. They were both minor edits, though, so the two may have just spotted spelling errors, or something. Good luck, though. --Ron Burgundy 19:43, 21 April 2006 (BST)
Thanks Ron. I put in the words to those you mentioned. Good thinking on the RRF. I should've thought of that! By the way, did you see 40 Year Old Virgin, and did you like it? I find Paul Rudd to be the Man. Cheers again, Rip purr 02:23, 22 April 2006 (BST)
I have not seen "40 Year Old Virgin"! I've been meaning to, though. Lately, I've been passing the time by getting drunk and watching Kung Fu movies. I highly recommend it, especially if you can find "Master of the Flying Guillotine"! --Ron Burgundy 04:40, 22 April 2006 (BST)
Master of the Flying Guillotine is classic. No offense intended to you, Ron, but I personally found it a comic achievement without parallel in the medium of film. The fight scene with Mr. Fantastic alone was worth the price of admission, to speak nothing of the bitter, bitter girl-tears.
Your Talk Page has become something of a second home to me, I feel. Perhaps I should arrange for the installment of a fouton and a mini-bar in the corner? --Undeadinator 05:41, 1 May 2006 (BST)
Haha! Do feel free. And yes, Master of the Flying Guillotine is my favorite movie of all times. I've actually begun worshiping several of the characters and I'll admit it, I cried when the Indian Fakir died.  :'( --Ron Burgundy 07:55, 1 May 2006 (BST)
Dubbed in a language other than English? Surely the movie would be ruined by this. 30% of what made it so classic was just the dubwork. Can you really imagine watching the fight-scenes without that nasally scream of "GENERIC ASIAN STEREOTYPE WINNAAAAAHHHHH! I couldn't bring myself to do it. Although I must say, the concept of a French version does have a certain masochistic charm to it.
As for this prequel you speak of, it is an undeniable fact that I must add it to my collection. Handicapped Asians walking to and fro upon the ceiling? That's what I call cinema. --Undeadinator 22:14, 1 May 2006 (BST)

ST. ISIDORE IS WATCHING YOU BURGUNDY! And I am quite seriously in a state of disbelief regarding this alleged "prequel". The very thought that there might be some kind of horrible Asian Jar-Jar Binks in the shadows, just waiting to jump out and completely fuck up the once-venerable franchise, is beyond my reckoning. Mesa da MASTAH of da flying gee-yo-tine! --Undeadinator 05:11, 2 May 2006 (BST)

Burn me a copy? Oh Ron, surely you are Odin's kindest angel. A Google search confirms that there is, indeed, a prequel...and that Jimmy Wang Yu is the most prodigious and wide-ranging cinematic genius since Orson Welles. And also that he walks on walls in the first one too. That's just ballin'. Could you provide me with a burned copy of either one, I would swear an oath of boundless loyalty and affection to the Channel 4 News Team. My e-mail is at And may the twisted remains of Wes Mantooth remain forever twisting in the nether. --Undeadinator 02:36, 3 May 2006 (BST)


Hey Ron. I don't know how easily you can contact your members but we could really use a doorzed for the towers since survivors can't open doors.

Sunnyside (neoncoax @ yahoo . com)

Hi there! I don't exactly have a means of contacting the Channel 4 News Team other than through the wiki (they're just so deeply undercover)! But, since you guys were as understanding about all this as you were, I can send one of my alts over there to keep things open for ya. Just tell me when you need it opened up and I'll get to it ASAP. It may take me some time to shamble on down there... my nearest abandoned alt is on the other side of the city and none have "memories of life." I guess [Furiour George] in Tollyton would be the best candidate, and I'm on my way. Thanks again for moving it to Yeandill Towers! :D --Ron Burgundy 19:54, 21 April 2006 (BST)

Some Vodka To You

I've got a couple of flats of Guinness, some vodka, and some Scotch sitting around here, just for the Channel 4 News Team! Love your work, and keep at it. Flying Spaghetti Monster knows that someone's gotta do it. -Wyndallin 15:25, 22 April 2006 (BST)

By the Gods, I am part of the Church of the FSM, too. May His Noodly Appendage touch us in Richmond Hills!
Kick some zombie ass. Just don't get any gore in your hair. That would be un-sexy. -Wyndallin 19:54, 22 April 2006 (BST)

Re: Amazing Banning

(This bit was actually meant for Ron) Unfortunatly, ignoring this one won't work particularly well. I was introduced to Amazing's caustic nature when I tried to fix something I thought was wrong. Even if you discount the innocent people who will eventually run into him, there will always be those who will continue replying to him, for whatever reason. --SirensT RR 15:34, 22 April 2006 (BST)

Apologies, Mia. Ron, you can find the rest of the conversation at Mia's talk page. CyberBob, Mia and I were having a conversation which Bob and I would be best served by moving. -Wyndallin 16:49, 22 April 2006 (BST)
Hah, don't worry about it. Can't talk about anything like this without making it big, right? And Mia, you're right, there will always be those who continue flame wars. That was sorta a secondary point in my argument. The point I really believe in was the Kantian one; don't change the rules to make vandalism mean "maliciousness and Amazing." --Ron Burgundy 19:57, 22 April 2006 (BST)
What about 'amazing maliciousness'? Oh, I'm so punny I fear that I'll keel over and die, bless my Irish heart. -Wyndallin 20:01, 22 April 2006 (BST)
"Amazing maliciousness" is "maliciousness from Amazing." It's against the rules because it's malicious, not because it's from Amazing. If Amazing is trying to pick a fight, he is vandalizing and you should enforce the rules. If Amazing is simply existing, he is not vandalizing, unless you sign the petition. --Ron Burgundy 20:24, 22 April 2006 (BST)
Because you're always classy, Ron, and I was making a horrible pun, it doesn't surprise me that you didn't pick up on it because how pedestrian it is. God, I'm tired. -Wyndallin 20:28, 22 April 2006 (BST)
Oh... oh, I get it! Yes, Amazing maliciousness is amazingly malicious! When in Rome! --Ron Burgundy 20:40, 22 April 2006 (BST)
You know, I do want to change the rules without somehow removing the right to troll at least a little. You know, something that kills people who troll a lot, and contribute next to nothing, like everyone's favorite 'Zing has. --SirensT RR 20:07, 22 April 2006 (BST)
If you want to change the rules, try writing up some sort of "good series of posts against bad series of posts" ratio so that when it's like 1:5, or something, you can bring the user to arbitration. Note that it's "series of posts," not "post" to protect people from a bunch of small edits about the same thing. I'm sure it's been suggested before, but I'd support it if it were suggested again, so long as it sticks to generalities (is something Amazing could support, were he so inclined). --Ron Burgundy 20:24, 22 April 2006 (BST)
Thanks for your input. I'll consider it. --SirensT RR 20:25, 22 April 2006 (BST)
Good luck with that, captin! --Ron Burgundy 20:40, 22 April 2006 (BST)

Harassment Policy

Cyberbob240 and I are working on a Harassment Policy. It's on either of our user pages, but the discussion seems to be happening on his talk page. Take a look at it, see what you think. Input is much appreciated at this stage. We're compiling a list of issues so we can modify it before it comes to a vote. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 19:38, 23 April 2006 (BST)

Cool beans and will do! I'll have to get back to you on it, though, as I'm stepping out at the moment. --Ron Burgundy 19:44, 23 April 2006 (BST)
Not a problem, and have a time. I'm sure you have some womanizing to do. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 19:48, 23 April 2006 (BST)

Template:StIsidore, from the Catholic Patron Saint of the Internet. I figured you might like to see him. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 18:45, 25 April 2006 (BST)

Glad you like him. I'm currently working three new boxes, on the suggestion of Brizth: one for dedicated survivors, one for dedicated zombies, and one for people who play as whatever they get turned into. Having trouble finding good images that aren't copyright or of questionable copyright status, though. Annoying -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 22:02, 25 April 2006 (BST)

Withy Motel

Ladayna, my other character, is sitting in the Withy Motel, sorta dazed and confused as to how he got there. Stupid combat rezzing. If you're interested, he can certainly meet up with you, alive or dead. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 18:22, 26 April 2006 (BST)

  • PS: The Withy Motel's in Richmond Hills. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 18:27, 26 April 2006 (BST)
C'mon down! It's a party and a half. We're mostly meeting up with ferals, at the moment. Nothing too tough. Right now, we're in the central part of the suburb and moving south! --Ron Burgundy 20:06, 26 April 2006 (BST)
Haha, I got sick of being a survivor (that's what my other character is for), and I jumped out the window. I won't munch on any reporters, though. My word of honour. -Wyndal (talk)-(W!)-(SGP) 21:19, 26 April 2006 (BST)

Broadcasting Live from the Dead

Hello Ron. I have made my way to Hovarcroft (quite an apt name eh?) but I am still as dead as before. If you know anyone that might be willing to hop over from the Mall to Moseley Police Department (2 east of Ackland Mall), and has a Syringe of Life, it would be greatly appreciated. Watch out, though, as this Moseisley PD is a hive of scum and villainy, but it may have the droids we're looking for. When I am revived, I will move along, move along and help you in your fight to displace the stormtroo..I mean, Zombies from the mall. Staying Classy, Tokakeke 04:28, 3 May 2006 (BST)

I'll pass the word along to my man with the revives! I'd do you myself, but I just spent my last AP barricading the Mall and getting eaten. --Ron Burgundy 04:31, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Searching the building, you find a link to Tokakeke's profile Tokakeke 04:36, 3 May 2006 (BST)

Caiger and Oxley

I'm Marty Banks and this is whats happening at Caiger, Tonight... Caiger is barely holding up against the organized Shacknews, TSO, and FU Zed Invaders. The zombies have just taken the last nearby source of revives, The Oxley Building in West Becktown. Marty Banks asks that any Channel Four News Team Members in the area redirect to Curle to retake Oxley at 7:00 PM Tonight. It shall be a glorious battle, hopefully worthy of Odin's love. -Stay Classy - --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 15:54, 6 November 2006 (UTC)

Happy Birthday

And a Glorious Hail to my brother in blood and honor. Conndrakamod T CFT 07:23, 22 October 2006 (BST)

Red Army Fraction

Hi there Mr Burgandy. The group calling themselves the Red Army Fraction claim that they were responsible for the for the "assassination of Corporate Media pig Ron Burgundy" on the 26th September. I'm trying to identify a few of their members, any chance you can remember who it was that attacked you? Officer Otep 17:17, 19 October 2006 (BST)

Yet Another New Template

This one slightly more useful. It's a small version for the NMC Template. --Paradox244 20:10, 1 August 2006 (BST)

This user or group is part of the New Malton Colossus.

New Template

Huzzah! While looking at the wonderful wiki page for the Yagoton Revivification Clinic the muses struck me with a most glorious idea! Behold!

C4NT Approved
C4NT heartily endorses this product and/or service.

This is for the pages of all the groups that C4NT approves of! Feel free to edit it for further classiness. --Paradox244 23:15, 27 July 2006 (BST)

Well I thought that they could add it if they wanted too declare their alligience. None the matter. Also, Bobtherock is still trying to level up. He won't be joining you in actual Glorious Battle until he can actually hit the blame zeds. No use in being a burden. He'll be there soon. Stay Classy! --Paradox244 17:28, 28 July 2006 (BST)

Big Bash

Hey me and my people (The Sun Orgnaization) are pulling out of Brooke Hills to Yagaton so im asking for your assistance to help defend Bale Mall against the Big Bash, im trying to rally as many groups together as i can to help defend the mall, message me back to tell me what you think or e-mail me at 13:04, 25 July 2006 (BST)

Pardon Me

There is an issue about a Vandal Banning that I want to bring to your attention. Specifically the case of ImperialRedDragon. Now, unless I am mistaken, the character here is also called ImperialRedDragon, and that character attributes himself with the group C4NT. Now I am not assured that these two accounts are the same person. However I am requesting that you contact said character and ask him that if it was him that was vandalizing the wiki how such an action is not allowed. --Karlsbad 06:08, 24 July 2006 (BST)

(Reposted from the User_talk:Karlsbad as according to the page's rules. --Kb)
I passed the word on to ImperialRedDragon. Hope he's not the same guy! That wouldn't be too Classy, would it? --Ron Burgundy 10:33, 24 July 2006 (BST)

News Needed

Hey Ron, I'm writing up the articles for next week's issue of the Mirror. I was wondering if you had any news for me on the state of channel 4, or the suburbs in your area... I'm kinda dry here and need some news to fill the paper...

Thanks for the update, sounds like a good story to publish... About the image, check the Channel 4 News Team Hotline You should check out the The Malton Mirror HQ page i've put up today, It's cool... I'd love if you guys did commentary on the wiki news radio about the issues in malton... My next publish is sunday or early monday... I've managed to get a scoop on something BIG out west here, but i have to wait before I can print it... Anyway, Thanks for the info, let me know if any other interesting tidbits float your way. See you in the Zombie Infested Filth, tell Brick to bring his trident for Maxwell Hammer... Hehehe!!

PS: I knew you guys were all seperate, I'm not that clueless, lol! --Marty Banks 01:45 AM, 16 July 2006 (EST)

Okay thanks, keep me posted... It's been kinda a slow news day out here... Lots of things are actually going on but I can't publish any of them... Just expect something big from DHPD soon... that's really all I can say... PS: about the pic, I've was a little too nosy this time, so i figured, if you ever need any image work done for the C4NT page just PM me at my page or more reliably use my contact channels listed on my wiki profile... -Stay Classy and have a Good Night! --MartyBanks 03:11, 30 July 2006 (BST)


yea i know the mall isnt looking so good. we did get the corner caded but the problem is that there are all ready so many inside. I dont Know what to do anymore Roftwood will always be our home but we dont really have the manpower to defend it anymore. Since we cant hold the Big Bash back any more i think well just try to rebuild what weve lost in this war. Just while im here I would like to form an Allegence with you Blazefire 09:18, 21 July 2006 (BST)

For the first time in VDO history we are leaving roftwood. Well be around for a few days to revive our members then were leaving for a safer suburb. let me know where you will be fighting next, we might just join you in glorious battle Blazefire 03:45, 22 July 2006 (BST)

wheres the news team now we could really use some help at giddings Blazefire 05:58, 27 July 2006 (BST)

Odin has blessed us. Roftwood is no longer a ghost town and we have a firm foothold in the area. Once weve cleaned up a bit and its safe to walk around outside I'll join you on a great crusade across malton to celebrate. PS the main troublemaker who was orginising the zeds in roftwood is now stuck to the side of our base with a pitchfork General Blazefire 11:16, 31 July 2006 (BST)

Thx Ron

I had made it and posted it to see if you guys liked it. The changes you made were awsome... Is it really the Malton Mirror, i better change mine then... I'll have more coming, and with actual articles... I'll probably post them on dev art with links from the Radio Free DHPD page and perhaps in the Channel 4 News Hotline... -Stay Classy and Infection Free -Marty Banks

sry ron

ron i didn't mean to put that pic on your regular page just on the disscusion page i went to change it, then my computer deided sry! bob8914

Master of the Flying Guillotine

Burn me a copy? Oh Ron, surely you are Odin's kindest angel. A Google search confirms that there is, indeed, a prequel...and that Jimmy Wang Yu is the most prodigious and wide-ranging cinematic genius since Orson Welles. And also that he walks on walls in the first one too. That's just ballin'. Could you provide me with a burned copy of either one, I would swear an oath of boundless loyalty and affection to the Channel 4 News Team. My e-mail is at And may the twisted remains of Wes Mantooth remain forever twisting in the nether. --Undeadinator 02:36, 3 May 2006 (BST)

It grabs me firmly, and in a rather sensitive region. That said, I am teh noobz at tech stuff: how do I download your sweet, delicious warez? --Undeadinator 03:06, 4 May 2006 (BST)

And now, I will teach you...the Technique of Jumping! Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, A,B, A, B, Start.

<3 Ron --Undeadinator 04:57, 6 May 2006 (BST)

Alas! While I managed to download that classic cinematic masterpiece, I am rendered unable by a strange technical difficulty to progress past roughly the ten minute mark. It simply crashes me to the desktop, throwing me into an agonizing fit of existential wonder: just how did that magnificent bastard LOSE HIS FUCKING ARM!?!? I shall stop by my local indy movie shop sometime during the week, that I might trade currency for the answer to this most diabolical of philosophical conundrums. --Undeadinator 02:22, 8 May 2006 (BST)

You've got to cut me in on this. I tried to find it after it was referenced in Kill Bill but I never could. I love 70s kung fu! --Zaruthustra-Mod 02:28, 8 May 2006 (BST)

太好了! I couldn't find them anywhere. I wish I could find the DVD and get it. --Zaruthustra-Mod 00:58, 10 May 2006 (BST)

You have ripped the precious hope of one-armed boxing from my womb, Burgundy, and now you wish to scorn me further by querying me about the pain? Thou art a wastly plumb. For real, though: either my comp or your link is a hideous noob, and I haven't yet had time to drop by my local chinasploitation video store. Fret not, Burgundy, for after finals I shall crush Jimmy Wang Yu with a hateful vengeance. Sorry for the delay. We'll be making in-jokes and crude innuendos about disabilities before you know it, don't worry. =)

--Undeadinator 21:48, 15 May 2006 (BST)

Alas that I have not yet found ample time to watch The One-Armed Boxer. My failure on this account has rendered my soul impure, and me eternally in the "Shit Book" of Jimmy Wang Yu's spirit wolf. In an effort to cleanse myself of this dishonor, I recently took advantage of an opportunity provided by my giggity cable service to watch Master of the Flying Guillotine...and I tell you, sir, that I have found in its sweet heart the key to infinite happiness.

For I have discovered the so-called "Rosetta Stone" of corny kung-fu movies in the wobbly bowels of this venerable film. The cornerstone to all ludicrous ass-beating is right there. It goes like this: the kung-fu abilities of any given character, and thus the emotional impact and spiritual depth of the movie, are directly proportional to the insanity of their gimmick. Let us take, for example, Bad Actress With Hideous Crone Hands and Professional Whore Who Pretends To Be A Monkey. At a glance, Monkey's animalistic characteristics, as well as his hella-rockin' haircut, would appear to give him the upper hand. I mean, c'mon: he's a guy who acts like a monkey. This fails to account, however, for the triple-header gimmick of his opponent, Crazed Chinese Whore With Claws. First, she is the daughter of a kung-fu master. That's worth a +5 to Baditude right there. Second, her face is vacuous and devoid of all human emotion; it is a well-regarded staple of the genre that shitty actors automatically get a +3 to sheer ass-kickery. Finally, she's a chick who knows how to fight. By writ of Odin himself, no mere mortal can defeat a chick who knows how to fight. Mathematically, it is easy to see why What Is Her Face is victorious over the ape-man.

Still not convinced? Let's take Foreign Guy Who Kicks Shit and That Stretchy Guy From Street Fighter II. Now, it is fairly obvious from a quick glance that Dhalsim--with the ability to stretch out his limbs to ridiculous lengths and choke Chinamen with them--has the more powerful gimmick. He is foreign, which is automatically a +12 to evilness, and he can stretch his limbs out real freaky like, which is at least a +7 to his ass-whupping potential. (And a +22 to his 70s' porn star stint, but that's aside the point.) He would appear to have a decided advantage over his foe. But consider: Feets McGee has a noticeable physical deformity on his shins, which provides him with a +3 bonus. Second, he has an exotic pre-fight ritual. Can you say multiplier? Finally, the coup d'grace, or whatever: he is disrespectful to his elders, and he spits in public. In Chinese culture, spitting in public is akin to raping the sister of the Emperor with a latex glove and gallon of formaldehyde. That ain't nothing to fuck with.

As for the Master himself, well, what can I say? Blind, aged beyond comprehension, eyebrows the size of fuzzy freight trains...that man is the complete package. The fact that he's a closet Nazi no doubt does wonders for his kung-fu abilities. I mean come on: he probably trained Himmler, and we all know what a master of the Crane Style ol' Heinrich was.

--Undeadinator 23:35, 21 May 2006 (BST)

I will grant you that the theory does, in certain places, have a few holes. Jimmy Wang Yu's upset defeat of Herr Guillotine certainly throws a big wrench in the works. However, I'm considering that Jimmy Wang Yu may have--by a cunning and insidious method--created for himself the greatest and, thus, most ass-kickingest gimmick of all. Consider: He wrote and directed a 70s' kung-fu flick that was morally and spiritually compelling. Like a modern day Orson Welles, he breaks all the boundaries and shatters all expectations. A guillotine-throwing, eyebrow-shuffling, axe-breathing badass kung-fu anti-Semite like the Master can't even hope to contend with somebody who is both literate and able to perform spinning kicks. --Undeadinator 05:53, 28 May 2006 (BST)

Broadcasting Live from the Dead

Hello Ron. I have made my way to Hovarcroft (quite an apt name eh?) but I am still as dead as before. If you know anyone that might be willing to hop over from the Mall to Moseley Police Department (2 east of Ackland Mall), and has a Syringe of Life, it would be greatly appreciated. Watch out, though, as this Moseisley PD is a hive of scum and villainy, but it may have the droids we're looking for. When I am revived, I will move along, move along and help you in your fight to displace the stormtroo..I mean, Zombies from the mall. Staying Classy, Tokakeke 04:28, 3 May 2006 (BST)

I'll pass the word along to my man with the revives! I'd do you myself, but I just spent my last AP barricading the Mall and getting eaten. --Ron Burgundy 04:31, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Searching the building, you find a link to Tokakeke's profile Tokakeke 04:36, 3 May 2006 (BST)

Emerald Guard

I hate to tell you guys but I think Caz of the RRF runs the Emerald Guard. And like 1/2 their members are RRF alts. Sooo...--Mpaturet 05:01, 3 May 2006 (BST)

Oh really? I was told they wanted to help out. Maybe they're just an RRF/survivors on the weekend alternate group. Well, it's not important. Thanks for the heads up, though! I've moved on to low-key buildings around Ackland Mall and we're staying Classy down there! --Ron Burgundy 05:32, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Good sources tell me that less than a quarter of the Emerald Guard actually have RRF alts. I'm fairly certain that you can count on their non-RRF support unless explicitly ordered otherwise by Caz. -Wyn (talk!) 08:20, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Got it. I commented on their wiki page about hearing that they wanted to come down. Caz said I have very big ears and that's the last I heard from 'em. I don't expect they will show up, but we shall see! --Ron Burgundy 13:50, 3 May 2006 (BST)
Busy cleaning up Dartside and Greentown, especially considering the ferals following the RRF around. What a mess. -Wyn (talk!) 15:47, 3 May 2006 (BST)

It's a trap!

Sorry dude... you were right... [5] :) --IQpierce 23:18, 5 May 2006 (BST)

I heard there was an attack at Caiger, but chalked it up to rumors, but I'd be a fool to ignore something twice! What's going on? --Ron Burgundy 20:19, 6 May 2006 (BST)


Thanks for the advice, sorry about the posting on your page- got a bit confused! Dog Deever.


I've noticed your work at creating templates for the Wiki and, being something of a n00b in the area of computer programming (except for writing an event or two in Europa Universalis II), I was wondering if you could make one for the Crimson Wolves. Nothing too fancy, just the logo and some text (I'll let you pick the textbox info and make suggestions if I think it can be improved).

I know you probably don't get too many requests for this sort of thing, and that you aren't exactly in the business of making templates for other users / groups, but I figured that it never hurts to ask :) --Specialist290 03:10, 12 May 2006 (BST)

Thanks for the template Ron :) --Specialist290 03:48, 14 May 2006 (BST)

C4NT Template

The black outline is really ugly. Could you make it that blue that is also on it? --Cyberbob240CDF - Arb - W! 09:57, 12 May 2006 (BST)

New template userbox..thing

Burgundy.JPG Ahhhhh!
This user or group makes Ron Burgundy angry.

Just a bit of fun. Tokakeke 03:04, 1 June 2006 (BST)

That's awesome! Now if only I could find someone who escapes my benevolence.  :) --Ron Burgundy 18:32, 2 June 2006 (BST)
How about Wes Mantooth? Tokakeke 03:49, 3 June 2006 (BST)
Yes! A fine idea! --Ron Burgundy 06:28, 3 June 2006 (BST)

Personal Request

Could I have an invite to the C4NT group in Nexus Wars? I would love to go into Glorious Battle along the illusterous Ron Burgundy! --Paradox244 00:11, 2 June 2006 (BST)

I don't know of the Channel 4 News Team on Nexus Wars. It could have been started by members of the Urban Dead team, but this is the first I've heard of it. Of course, feel free to join my Channel 4 News Team in Urban Dead!  :) --Ron Burgundy 18:32, 2 June 2006 (BST)
Gasp! That means that someone is impersonating you on Nexus Wars! How could such a thing happen! And I might do a stint with the C4NT if I can find the time, but right now I have obligations to the DHPD. But I still hope to follow you into Glorious Battle! --Paradox244 20:46, 2 June 2006 (BST)
I noticed that I think they're claiming to be Brick if memory serves...Which it almost never does...--Labine50 MHG|MalTel 03:23, 1 July 2006 (BST)

Acid War Templars

Hey Ron, it's only been a couple months since we first discussed opening operations in Havercroft, but now things are really about to get rolling. We have set up our main base in Edgecombe and a backup one in Roftwood. There are no zeds in this area to kill anymore. We have voted, and Havercroft is looking like a winner. Expect to see Acid War Templars residing in Auston Auto Repair shortly. --N dG 9:52, 4 June 2006 (BST)

I LOVE YOU(but it's only the beer talking...)

Your name, your group, and your sheer classiness are truely a wonder to behold and a shining example for all. By Great St Michael's Blade, you may be the best damn UD player I have ever had the pleasure of seeing.(It was a safe, acceptable, very heterosexual 'happy' pleasure, to be clear) Odin, Zeus, Jupiter, Rama, Buddha, Mohammad, and Jesus are pleased. Kindly remove this message once you've read it, or when I sober up, whichever is first.

Just wanted to say that, Ray

I love you, too! And don't worry about editing the wiki while wasted. I do it all the time! --Ron Burgundy 05:00, 8 June 2006 (BST)


Retaking Barrville

Hello illustrious Head Anchor/Battlemaster! I have begun C4NT's conquest of Barrville by setting up an outpost in a Necrotech Building at 40,43. Our numbers are small and face great risk from small zombie groups. I believe we must rush en masse like a sea of ravenous paparazzi to quickly stregthen our position as if we are wiped out it will be difficult to restablish our stronghold. If you approve of this battle plan will you spread the word that the Nix Building is the place to be? --Jon Pyre 00:27, 14 June 2006 (BST)

Ron, I read your message on Jon Pyre's talk page. Are you trying to achieve publicity of your intended operation, or avoid it? (I think you're trying to garner attention, but I'm not 100% certain. It just doesn't seem like a good idea to publicise a list of targets anymore than necessary. Not unless you want the RRF to catch on and eat ya.) –Xoid STFU! 05:16, 14 June 2006 (BST)

We're already there. Nix is a particularly good location since it has an adjacent Police Station and hospital 1se 1s from it. Once we have Nix, the PD, and the hospital I'm going to try to get people to take the two NTs diagonal from each other in the center of the suburb. I know there's a risk of giving away our position by promoting it too heavily but I probably wouldn't have been able to get as many people there as I have without shouting it out over the radio. I think what's important is quickly reaching that critical mass where we have a large enough crowd so somebody is checking the barricades every few minutes. I'd rather have the zombies know where I am but have a huge crowd of defenders than rely on stealth. --Jon Pyre 07:35, 14 June 2006 (BST)

Barrville Barricades

Ron, you really should do your research before making assumptions. While it is true that most of Barrville is unbarricaded, it is not true that there is no rhyme or reason to what barricades there are. There is also already a barricade plan in existence for the suburb, that those groups who were already operating there before your glorious arrival are working on. You might consider contacting the groups that were already active there before just stomping on things. --Gilant talk|DEM 02:39, 17 June 2006 (BST)

I softened the tone of your update a bit, but that's all I think needs changing for now. And we can debate the UBP some other time. My main point was, which I'm glad you don't have a problem with, is that you should work with other local groups in deciding what to declare should be barricaded how. There are a number of groups that have been working hard to start retaking Barrville for weeks already, and Axes High never left (well OK, there was a period of time they didn't sleep there much). Please come join the forum so you can take a look at what we have available for information there and contact some of the other groups already coordinating there. When you join PM me (Alex DeWitt) and I'll grant you access to the restricted area, where we can talk more freely. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Gilant (talkcontribs) .

Barricade strafes do not count as actual barricaded buildings. It has no defence for the suburb. Unless there are harmanz in those buildings to keep those barricades up then it is still dangerous for harmanz. An example would be Stickling Mall. No harmanz in it but everyday some idiot would barricade it up. Does that mean the Mall is safe? No. As for the exact numbers of zombies, it can be rounded up to 150 since it is a lot closer to it than 50. Think of it this way, say you're in a sport by age groups. You're of the lowest age of that group and you're up against a team only one year younger than the next group. Think they should be in the same group as you? Honestly Ron, you're changing it to Dangerous to piss people off and get a reaction. How about this? When you bring in 400 survivors to Barhahville and hold it for a month then I'll allow you to change it to any color. But until then there are still a lot of zombies, a lot of buildings opened, and a lot of people dying. Sonny Corleone WTF 03:26, 19 June 2006 (BST)

Yes I am. I'd say 3 out of the 4 buildings broken into are empty. Meaning there is no significant presense. Sonny Corleone WTF 12:20, 19 June 2006 (BST)
No. And technically I cannot tell you where I am. Sonny Corleone WTF 18:25, 19 June 2006 (BST)
Sonny, get a grip. We have extensive scouting reports on Barrville, as well as most of Malton. Barrville is dangerous, yes - I certainly wouldn't call it a safe suburb, not would I say it is survivor controlled. But until the recent horde that's on the Nix building showed up, there were a dozen suburbs with more zombies and fewer barricaded buildings in which to take shelter - in other words, that were more dangerous. We barricade lots of buildings, so that the people working here have options - if there were only ten buildings barricaded it wouldn't be terribly hard for you to find us, now would it! ;) Also keep in mind that while the general population in Barrville is lower than average, the average level of the survivors here is probably twice the mean. So I'd say that, ATM, you have no more right to claim control than we do; but the tide does seem to be swinging in our favor, at least for the past few days. --Gilant talk|DEM 14:40, 20 June 2006 (BST)

Ron, seriously, come join the forum and PM me. We'll try to get someone on your board as well. But there are things you need a rep on ours to get access to. --Gilant talk|DEM 14:40, 20 June 2006 (BST)

Reproduced from my Talk Page

  • Just in case you missed it... "RL stuff is understandable. I've had all sorts of RL problems before, so you're in good company :D" Cheers. --Specialist290 21:14, 23 June 2006 (BST)

Seen this?

Seems our favorite zombie and wikizen has got himself a promotion - it'll be interesting to see how this affects the group. Will he maintain the status quo, do something new and exciting or simply run the group into the ground until it's another DARIS/CoL that only lives on past glory? Regardless: newsworthy, no? --Major Grippy 11:55, 26 June 2006 (BST)


I was just given some real life bad news so I'll make this quick. Everytime I make a news update about Central Malton it is usually followed by a "barricades are extremely very awesomely omego heavily, 500 gajillion survivors, and 0 zombies." Now to prove shit like this wrong I got to drop what I'm doing to go take screenshots to prove that survivors are smoking fucking PCP. Now that's just fucking annoying. So now you know why I said that. The wiki is survivor biased because they can easily make up lies abotu numbers while zombies can't. Sonny Corleone WTF 05:15, 10 July 2006 (BST)

The 2nd Annual Malton Iditarod

My apologies Ron Burgundy, I was distracted by events occuring on a certain island inhabited by smelly pirates and their smelly pirate whores (the details can be found at: The Scurvy Crew of the Hell-born Strumpet ). I only recently saw your message concerning the possibility of a second Malton Iditarod dated during the Mall Tour. Speaking for myself and the Iditarod staff (basically me, my brother who has his own character, past Iditaroders, and interested parties who have approached us since) I can say with absolute confidence that we intend to hold a second Malton Iditarod. The Siege of Caiger Mall was, after all, a major victory for all of survivor-dom and possibly the most significant single battle in Malton history. It would be downright disrespectful if we didn't turn its anniversary and the celebratory Iditarod into an annual Malton-Wide holiday.

This fall is still a long way off, but we're already considering the logistics of event-planning and how to improve on the previous Iditarod. When we're finally ready to announce the Second Iditarod we'll need to reach a lot of people, and I can think of no one better suited than Ron Burgundy and the Channel 4 News Team to tell people what's happening. If it's logistically possible we might work out some kind of radio interview, or simply ask that you inform the public and let them decide like the street-savvy journalists you are. In any case, keep Malton classy, Ron Burgundy. -Tyler Whitney0

Got it! Keep me posted and I'll try and work things out with you guys when the time comes. --Ron Burgundy 02:30, 12 July 2006 (BST)


Spying on the Big Bash Ron? I'll have to say I'm more than a little disappointed, you were one of the really awesome survivors, in fact you revived me more than once back at Caiger I. But this? Not classy Mr Burgundy, not classy at all. --Outstanding 01:21, 12 July 2006 (BST)

Oh, don't worry, we're not spying. We're just keeping in touch with the people involved so as to better coordinate our mutual destruction. We don't have a man on the inside, or anything like that. By "diversity," I meant "zombie-correspondents." I guess I should change that so other people don't make the same mistake. Thanks for the heads up! So, I revived you a few times, eh? Were you the one with brain rot that I'd stick every couple of days? --Ron Burgundy 02:40, 12 July 2006 (BST)
Hmmm, I'll believe you this time ;-), although you do realise now, that I'll have to try and convince them all to turn round and smash Ackland since you won't be expecting it right? And no I wasn't a brainrotter, I was a defender, I'd get revived, say thanks if I seen you and then go back to barricading/cracking zombie skulls. --Outstanding 15:04, 12 July 2006 (BST)

Like I said, We can spy on you too!--DHRR10 16:38, 9 September 2006 (BST)

Revives for C4NT

I have an alt that was fighting with you in Havercroft, and I witnessed the fall of Ackland this morning. As a representive of the Secret Six, I would like to offer revives for all News Team members that fell in combat today...hell that goes for anyone in the New Malton Colossus. Said point will be two blocks East of the Nichols mall, Naylor Walk (61,53). I know that is a bit of a trip, but it seems that Nichols will be coming up shortly on the Big Bash hit list, so this will give you a chance to just continue the fight. --CYossarain 17:02, 15 July 2006 (GMT)

Thanks a bunch- and boy, do we have our share of casualties. We may be falling back to Nichols en masse. Yesterday, Ackland had 200ish survivors, today 70 remain. The rest are dead or scattered, so you'll have your hands full! Any idea how many revives you guys can provide? I don't think we're going to be able to make another stand at Nichols. We might be better off just trying to get our people back up and running and by then, Nichols will have already been passed over. --Ron Burgundy 20:04, 15 July 2006 (BST)
Its really up to you, we could use the numbers boost...and we can get 40ish revives done with in the next day. Let me know if you change your mind. I will still keep men on watch for that revive point. --CYossarain 19:52, 15 July 2006 (GMT)


Altough Odin's will may not be on your side lately, I feel inclined to pay my respects to you, Ron Burgundy. As a member of the RRF and The Big Bash that took part in both 1st and 2nd latest Ackland Mall sieges, one of the many that fumble the doors open at Nichols, and (with my alt) as a member of the Yagoton Revivification Clinic itself, where you are standing at this very moment, I can just feel there's much that many survivors could learn of an Anchorman such as you. In one of my adventures to help those in need at South Blythville, I had to get revived at Caiger (the closest, working revive point) and the negligence, the indiference that these survivors show for everything but their own land and property is not worthy of the fame of the mall they hold. But you are on of the few that deserve a place amongst heroes:

Lo there, do I see my father
Lo there do I see my mother and my sister and my brothers
Lo there I do see the line of my people back to the beginning
Lo they do call to me
they bid me to take my place among them
in the hallowed halls of Valhalla
where the brave shall live forever!

Regards. --Matthew Fahrenheit YRC | T | W! 21:50, 18 July 2006 (BST)


Please do not vandalize this wiki. If you continue this behaviour, you may be banned from editing the wiki. –Bob Hammero ModB'cratTA 03:02, 20 July 2006 (BST)

What are you talking about? --Ron Burgundy 07:17, 20 July 2006 (BST)
Rescinded. Please don't hate me. Classy FTW? –Bob Hammero ModB'cratTA 07:52, 20 July 2006 (BST)
No problem, dude.  :) --Ron Burgundy 08:48, 20 July 2006 (BST)

The Last Stand

Since the Big Bash mostly all the suberbs have been destroyed and ravaged even the Ackland Mall and Caiger Mall but one group of malls stand strong the southeast corner it be where we should have the final showdown or last stand of the surviors we should call it. So since everything has been ravaged in the other corners we at Gulsonside and the ever so popular Black Hunter Group invite you and your group to defend Gulsonside's mall. Please give us your answer at our discussion page or at my talk page we eagerly await your answer.--Coolo 09:12, 22 July 2006 (BST)


Aww...where's your sense of fun? The idea of survivor islands would be cool. I know it'll never happen but it's such a cool idea. If Land of the Dead didn't suck so much then it would have been cool. Actually...anything would be cool if it didn't suck. Point is, why shoot it down without even playing along for a bit? Sonny Corleone WTF 23:58, 24 July 2006 (BST)

Caiger Mall is bot/zerg/noob/PKer island. My PKer is there and I've already seen several zergs and a ton of PKing. And there's a mistake on your C4NT page. The CoL has nothing to do with my plan. They're the original Council that is back. The only thing changed is that they wil lnot defend Malls anymore but instead help evacuate people and clear up dangerous places for survivors to move into. Sonny Corleone WTF 00:27, 25 July 2006 (BST)
I'll let you in on a secret. We're trying to turn the city into a recreation of the Soviet Flag. We plan on allowing some suburbs in the NW go Yellow. Sonny Corleone WTF 01:41, 25 July 2006 (BST)
No. Smiley faces make me angry. Soviet Flag FTW. Judgewood is now Orange. That ruins our plan. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 19:13, 25 July 2006 (BST)
I'm not a Grateful Dead fan. I like the Soviet Flag. Yeah. Let's go with the Soviet Flag. Unless you have something against Soviets... Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 19:27, 25 July 2006 (BST)
That's your job. We can't make Red suburbs go to Yellow. Survivors do that. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 19:31, 25 July 2006 (BST)

Welcome to our Wiki

--Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 05:59, 27 July 2006 (BST)

Don't feel too flattered. I did it to everyone I saw that edited a page. You, the mods, some random people, etc. Pretty much everyone who was never welcomed was now welcomed. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 21:52, 27 July 2006 (BST)
So how long did it take you to make the template? Cause it took me a few seconds to paste the welcome template. I feel like my gift is inadequate. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 21:58, 27 July 2006 (BST)
Yeah...about the baby...It's freaking the shit out of me. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS CoL 22:50, 27 July 2006 (BST)


please consider making the pledge for you and your group--Gage 16:56, 29 July 2006 (BST)

Please lets. It's a good thing. --Paradox244 21:23, 29 July 2006 (BST)
I'm looking at it... doesn't seem like it prevents more than the game allows. That and a lot of the things are defined pretty loosely. Is there a strict definition somewhere or procedures and the like, or is this just based on good faith? --Ron Burgundy 21:48, 29 July 2006 (BST)

Danger Reports

I noticed your recent edits to Ketchelbank's danger level. Just a tip for in the future... If you modify the level first , then place the report. It will automaticaly flip the color right away on the page. I had an alt by ther the other day and other than the zoo itself, it did look pretty good. --Max Grivas JG,T,P! 22:21, 29 July 2006 (BST)

Sometime, Somewhere

No worries Ron, I've researched the C4NT thoroughly, and I'm aware that you ride into glorious battle, wherever it may be, and however dangerous it may be. So there's no problem that you won't be making your way over to Bale Mall. We've made a bold move back into Brooke Hills anyway now, in an attempt to reclaim our suburb, despite it being so vastly over run with the 'livingly challenged'. I know how hopeless it may seem to stand up to TBB, but so far we've rallied more than 400 survivors to the cause of fending off The Big Bash. I beleive another 100 and victory could be within our grasp. Good luck down in South Blythville and Marven Mall though Ron! Hope to work with you and your news crew some day though Mr.Burgendy, t'would be an honour. Give your precious Brick a hug from us here at The Sun Org. --Chopper 22:55, 29 July 2006 (BST)

If possible, that would be greatly appreciated Ron. Brooke Hills will be taken down to an Orange zone soon enough, but we could do with as much help as possible. At the moment, it is nothing more than an idea, but in a few months time we were thinking about moving southward to set up a new HQ in Pole Mall. So if by any chance you would be able to leave some help for us in Brooke Hills, we'd happily name the Suit store in Pole Mall after yourself ^.^ Being a Japanese orientated group, you know we'll only have the most stylish of suits available! Perhaps using Brian Fantana and his lengendary 'Sex Panther' scent could drive away a horde or two on it's own? --Chopper 20:23, 30 July 2006 (BST)

Suburb Control Conspiracy

I ain't trying to control the wiki. I have the Packers there and they're saying the suburb is dead. Especially the C4NT being at the Zoo. I love that the suburb page says you're at the Zoo but you're not. Why not say you're in South Blythville and operate from Yagoton? Maybe Dunell Hills from Dulston? Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 02:32, 30 July 2006 (BST)

It's too big. It'll stretch the page. But the Packers are one of the best strike teams in the RRF. I have sent the Brotherhood of the Shadow to Yagoton, they've found like 20 C4NT there. Shouldn't you update the Ketchelbank page syaing you're not in the Zoo? I can do it for you since lying on the wiki is wrong. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 03:08, 30 July 2006 (BST)
You've sent the Brotherhood of the Shadow to Yagoton? Seeing as The RRF have decided to back track a little to the SE, it'll be quite some time before they hit Bale Mall, so The Sun Org are moving back into Brooke Hills to reclaim the suburb. You've left a few members of the C4NT back in Yagoton Ron? By any chance would you fancy sending a small unit of reporters to give your fans here at The Sun Org a helping hand in taking back their 'burb? Just a handful of extra Survivors would make a difference to us Mr.Burgendy. --Chopper 11:36, 30 July 2006 (BST)
Don't worry. I got the Breakfast Club after your group ChopperReid. You see, planning on invading Ridleybank will get you killed. It's that simple. I couldn't give a fuck about Brooke Hills. The suburb sucks. But you and the Shrike wanted to invade because you all got killed. And remember the time that you all got killed in Brooke Hills? Brotherhood of the Shadow did it because of your members thought it was smart to attack a person that could sense that someone shot them that was a square to the east. Smart. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 16:04, 30 July 2006 (BST)
I'll see what I can do about bringing some attention to things in Brooke Hills. A lot of the News Team people are interested in heading down south- in fact, it was entirely their idea- so I'm not sure how many will hang around. I'll leave an alt up there by the name of "Furious George" and see if I can be of any use to you. Oh, and Sonny... I could have sworn that I once invaded Ridleybank and didn't die. Retreated to help out at Ackland, but survived Ridleybank pretty well.  :) --Ron Burgundy 18:15, 30 July 2006 (BST)
I found you in Havercroft. I would have killed you if I wasn't so interested in killing Major Grippy at the time. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 22:43, 30 July 2006 (BST)

Hmm, by all means Sonny, feel free to send the 'Brekfast Club' after us, but know two things beforehand... Firstly, it was The Shrike that wanted to invade Ridleybank, we discussed it over and over, but I made it blaintantly obvious and clear that attacking Ridleybank now would only result in a masacre, so without the aid of The Sun Org, it was called off. Secondly Sonny, just to right the wrong that you came out with, I do remember the time that 'the Junkyard' in Brooke Hills was raided, but don't be jumping to conclusions in saying 'we all got killed', because you never managed to finnish me, nor did you manage to maul each survivor in the building to death. So assuming that your Zombah' killed all of us would be rather childish. Guess you'll have to make sure you clean up properly next time? Anticipating your arrival Sonny... --Chopper 12:10, 2 August 2006 (BST)

I was in Peppardville at the time of the attack. Yeah. That's not Brooke Hills. And you told me that everyone died so I was taking your word for it. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 14:28, 2 August 2006 (BST)
Never been to Peppardville myself.. I told you that everyone died? I told you that aside from myself, you killed every member of The Sun that was residing in there. That Junkyard is actually the HQ to our allies, The Brooke Hills Dog Soldiers, and I'm pretty sure that you never managed to wipe all of them out. By all means, if you can show me where exactly I stated that you killed every last one of us in there then I'll have quite obviously been proven wrong, my mind can be hazy sometimes.. But I'm pretty sure I never said you killed all of us. Anyway Sonny, by all means you can give me the finger... But I'd quite like to know when Sonny Corleone himself will be stopping by in Brooke Hills or perhaps Yagoton? --Chopper 16:26, 2 August 2006 (BST)
You didn't say every last man died. You did everyone who stayed there died. Which is pretty much a given. Anyone who logs on and stays dies. Anyone who logs on and leaves lives. Yagoton won't be hit for some time now. We're going SE first since we do not want to backtrack. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 16:44, 2 August 2006 (BST)

Bureaucrat Promotions

Could you vote on mine? Pretty please? Cyberbob  Talk  10:00, 31 July 2006 (BST)


Thanks for pointing out that double vote. >_< I'll be more careful in the future. –Xoid STFU! 11:11, 7 August 2006 (BST)

Dear Ron Burgandy...

Dear Ron, I would really enjoy giving birth to a few of your Glorious Children. :D lol --Sabbit 02:21, 9 August 2006 (BST)

D Yay! I will try my best. I keep trying to get over to where you guys are, but I always end up dying. I'm working on it. lol. See you soon, hopefully. :) --Sabbit 02:44, 23 September 2006 (BST)

South Blythville

Yo, Ron. Has your group been to South Blythville yet? Cause the wiki pages says your group is there but last I heard a Packer killed you in Ackland and now your group is part of the Big Dash in Ridleybank. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 15:56, 10 August 2006 (BST)

No. And I do hope the Red Ridleybank stays Red Ridleybank. Because I've promised to be a happy camper as long as Greater Ridleybank isn't fucked with on the wiki. I don't care how barricade strafed it is. It being changed because of barricade strafes will make me really unhappy. Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 01:37, 11 August 2006 (BST)
Because people vandalize the wiki and they think "LOLZ Ridleybank green FTW *Caiger e-penis stroke*" It get's And you guys are welcome to stay in buildings in Ridleybank as long as you'd like. It's finding empty buildings that get's me. Claiming you're somewhere when you're not? Lying isn't very fun. I still think you and the Cannonball Crew should not put your group logo on the Groups column. You're only going to be there for a short time. You don't see Big Bash or the RRF putting their logo on Gulsonside, now do you? Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 02:10, 11 August 2006 (BST)
Why do you like making templates that stretch my page? Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS 05:58, 11 August 2006 (BST)

Special delivery for Mr. Burgundy...

Ron, I've always been impressed by your Class, but this latest Cunning Plan to hold the Great Zombie Homeland is inspired. I've come to Ridleybank with my mailbag stuffed with FAKs, fuel, and a few specialty items, and I'm trying to summon the rest of the Malton Postal Service to join the party. If we can help you in anyway, let us know. Ciao! --Bake Hayes 04:14, 22 August 2006 (BST)

Wow! A whole 5 people! The RRF gives up. A group of 5 people is no match for us! Sonny Corleone WTF RRF ASS DORIS Hunt! 04:39, 22 August 2006 (BST)
Geeze Sonny, do you have to take everyone down...Just give it a rest, alright...
My father, and my fathers father were both postman, and I'd rather have five good postal employees on my side than any army you care to name!PadreRomero 00:26, 24 August 2006 (BST)

A word please, Mr. Burgundy

Mr. Burgundy, we Crossmen have always counted Channel 4 NT as friends. I would like a word with you outside this venue. Is there a place we could talk? AIM or email? It would be much appreciated. Stay classy! --Zod Rhombus 02:59, 31 August 2006 (BST)

Vandal banning

It's not big deal. When you stay on the Wiki for a while you know who is prone to misbehave and who can't possibly act in bad faith. And about your Spanish: don't worry, my English isn't that good either.

Oh, BTW, stand up on Margery so we can revive you! You dropped your scotch on your way to death, but don't worry: there's plenty of classy pleople to take care of it, as long as you don't mind some sharing. --Matthew Fahrenheit YRCT+1 07:00, 1 September 2006 (BST)

"Thanks! :D --Ron Burgundy 06:35, 5 November 2006 (UTC)" don't thank me Ron I still want to eat your brains! --Zbmainiac 00:36, 7 November 2006 (UTC)


Words cannot express how much I love that you're referring to the Blackmore as the News Station. In Ridleybank of all places!! Awesome... Tyler Whitney0 02:43, 2 September 2006 (BST)

I've been waiting to use that one! I think I need to make it more official. Ron Burgundy 04:33, 2 September 2006 (BST)

NPOV, Ridleybank, and You

If you keep trying to turn the Ridleybank suburb page into a "pimp my clan" or survivor diary, I will bring it to the attention of the mods, i.e. vandal banning. And that's a pain in the ass neither one of us want, I'm sure. Leave it as an encyclopedic NPOV history, please. --Mookiemookie 17:23, 3 September 2006 (BST)

A member of Lebende Tote offers to buy Rahn Barganbah a scotch

Ron, we're a Horde that has moved away from the drama of Griggs Heights and offer you & the other groups in South Blythville a good game. I hear that you are in Reganbank at the moment and ask you to look for the Lil Redneck Boys. Their a good survivor group that we've played against in the past. As always, stay classy!--Balistic 20:42, 3 September 2006 (BST)

ahhh, well since your in Ridleybank....pop a cap in Sonny C. for us.  :) Hey, also.....I was thinking of popping in on your forum and saying hey to all of the C4NT but I don't want to look like i'm forum spying or any of your site secure enough so that a zombie can talk to your team on an outer board and not see any of your sensitive info for game strategery.--Balistic 21:52, 4 September 2006 (BST)



- I have gotten you twice so far.--Gage 18:30, 4 September 2006 (BST)

Wow, nice going! are you with us zombies? And FYI Ron, I know lots of you "guns" and I'm not Wes Mantooth. (But off the subject, the movie is very funny!)--DHRR10 16:34, 9 September 2006 (BST)

make that 3 times--Gage 23:57, 22 September 2006 (BST)

Will you fucking stop that?

You're spamming recent changes and wasting server space. –Xoid STFU! 07:05, 15 September 2006 (BST)

Request for Investigative Reporting

Ron, The DMZ and the surounding burbs have been blanketed with grafitti that paints the DHPD in a quite unflattering light. Seems some griefers have taken it upon themselves to paint the town with "Join DHPD or Die" "This Building for DHPD Only" and other tension building statements trying to create an issue between the DHPD and Other Survivor groups. Could you spread the "classy" word and if C4nt happens to hear anything let us know...

Conndrakamod T CFT 23:51, 20 September 2006 (BST)

Much thanks for the "News Coverage" seems to have helped the sitch a great deal. In Response I offerthis bit from the M.I.A. Looks like a major hit is planned by one group of PKers on the Bastion of the Royal Flush and another is planning a massive hit on "The Unconqured place..." much love Conndrakamod T CFT 23:34, 26 September 2006 (BST)
See the DHPD private board... Conndrakamod T CFT 02:37, 27 September 2006 (BST)
Check out Red Army Fraction Seems you have developed an International following. Conndrakamod T CFT 20:39, 3 October 2006 (BST)

Designated Trident Carrier

So, Ron, can I appoint myself the Designated Trident Carrier? Oh wait, I already did. Hope you don't mind. :) Squidward 10:18, 21 September 2006 (BST)

Thank You...

...for excepting my character DJSpinbad in the Channel 4 News Team. I really appreciate it. So I'm now awaiting your classy orders on what I should have him do. --Axe Hack 02:55, 22 September 2006 (BST)

Zod speaks!

I was wanting to express interest in the New Malton Colossus. CDF would like to be a part, yet right now we are low on members. We are actively recruiting, though. How many guys can we send to help? We have some disturbances around home, but I could spare a few guys. Let me know amd stay classy! --Zod Rhombus 07:54, 25 September 2006 (BST)


vouch = no more pking?--Gage 02:23, 28 September 2006 (BST)

Fine by me--Gage 02:34, 28 September 2006 (BST)

Thanks for the revive, but,

I'm a bit of a death cultist at the moment! :D And touring with the Bash when in my undead state. Sorry about the group tag - I forgot to change it, that's fixed now. So, just a clarification, I wouldn't want you to waste your needles to revive me under false pretenses. It's only fair that I waste the needles of those who don't know about my PKer status ;)

By the way, congratulations on what C4NT has done with Ridleybank since I left you guys. Holding a single small building for a month against hundreds of zombies is a huge accomplishment. Your reputation for Glorious Battle is undiminished! - Rheingold 06:48, 30 September 2006 (BST)


I took care of TheCure's vandalism of your page for you. Let me know if anything else needs taken care of. Conndrakamod T CFT 18:12, 30 September 2006 (BST)

Your Barricade Suggestion

I like it a lot, you can read what I wrote on the Sept. 28th page where it is. I make no implications, I just wanted to ask that you continue to fight for this suggestion in the unfortunate event that it doesn't go through. I am relieved to see a truly viable idea that could end or at least hamper all barricade bots. You stay classy Mr. Burgundy. --Kiltric 23:50, 2 October 2006 (BST)

Viva La Humanity

     I hope this message gets to you...

I'm Officer Mark Hazzyrd, part of Viva La Humanity, a group founded with the mission of reclaiming Malton from the dead heads and Rotten Rodneys that plauge our great city.

Sir, you can't go anywhere in Malton without hearing about the exploits of the Channel 4 News Team and frankly, we could use your help.

Due to the sensative nature of our current operations I cannot go into details of our movements, but it would be a major boon to consider you and your group as friends to Viva La Humanity. Any good word that you can put in for us would be appreciated. In return we can provide you and your men with any information on zed movement, troop numbers and any other pieces of intel that we can provide.

Stay Classy Ron Burgandy, and we'll do the same.

Officer Mark Hazzyrd Viva La Humanity


Man, I've been in Ridleybank a few days and haven't found any Scotch yet! What the hell is going on here?? HAHA! Even some Stella would be nice. Or maybe Flying Dog Old Scratch? When I get nibbled on in Blackmore I need something to dull the pain, classy brother. --Zod Rhombus 23:43, 12 October 2006 (BST)

Remember Blackmore

Damn that was an awesome stand there Ron. 20 yo Glenn Denning for all the Vets of Blackmore. Please advise your listeners that the DMZ welcomes any in need of revivals or R&R. We have a large number of NT people ready to help at any of 6 principle revive points. It may be a bit of a walk but once revived we are a little more survivor friendly while still having available targets once revived. As always we look forward to seeing you. Conndrakamod T CFT 17:09, 13 October 2006 (BST)

Glad to see you're keeping everybody's heads on a swivel. I was really disappointed by the intial reactions on the Blackmore forums. Then only thing worse than a defeat is defeatism. Luckily a reminder of exactly who we are and what it took for the zeds to bring us down seems to invigorated the lot of us. The RRF is spiritually bankrupt and their failure to expunge us, even with shameful death cultist tactics, proves it. They had to call in other hordes and ferals to do their fighting for them. Barhah isn't what it used to be. So! Now that we have a Thermopylae, and have won the Love of the Gods all we need is a Platea or a Gaugamela... Tyler Whitney0 03:18, 14 October 2006 (BST)

Sugestion IF you want to take the wind out of Shacknews assault on teh Mall, wait till they get there and then retake Blackmore en force. It would be like taking Paris while Napoleon was outside Stalingrad.Conndrakamod T CFT 23:17, 15 October 2006 (BST)

That Template You Wanted Help With?

It's fixed. Simple solution, no? Don't worry, forgetting a pipe or quote here and there happens to all of us from time to time. –Xoid STFU! 05:50, 15 October 2006 (BST)

Greetings Ron and the Valiant C4NT

    Recently I was able to make a short broadcast on the radio to everyone out there that was willing 
to listen...but I'm afraid I can't reach the amount of listeners that I would hope to.  The broadcast 
is recorded in the archives of the Survivor Diaries...would it be possible to beseach you and your 
team to send this out to the people?  I would be forever indebted to you and yours Ron.  

Stay Classy you Magnificent Bastard!!!—The preceding unsigned comment was added by Mark Hazzyrd (talkcontribs) at an unknown time.


You know I value your counsel in all things, but I'm not especially digging your call to immediately evacuate Ackland. My thought is we should be trying to impede the zed advances as much and as long as possible. Once they start building up a whole bunch of momentum we have hundreds of refugees moving from place to place, and then we're right back where we were in mid-July. Red suburb map, and revive queue's at Caiger and Yagoton a hundred people deep. If anything we should be using Ackland as a holding action so that the Blackmore veterans who are scattering far and wide have the opportunity to find their revives. Yeah, there is the threat of a blitzing horde taking the Mall in the first 48 hours of the siege, but simply pulling out is... a hard pill to swallow. Tyler Whitney0 00:30, 16 October 2006 (BST)

Shacknews is making their push on the NW corner right now, I barricaded up and tried to rouse the other corners to action. I've aped out so I don't know what the situation is like at the present. I figured you'd know who to tell for the counter-attack. Tyler Whitney0 02:06, 16 October 2006 (BST)

First order of business might be setting up another revive/rally point in case Ackland falls. Tyler Whitney0 02:32, 16 October 2006 (BST)

Thank you for the lovely snack. Missed your classy self Ron, hope to have a bite with you soon after we finish bargain hunting. XOXO Shacknews Zombie Horde.

PS: We admire your classy, classy brains.--FyunchClick 02:57, 16 October 2006 (BST)

Ron, I can only hope that snacking on your brains will be as satisfying as reading your news updates. You make this game 10x more fun to play. XOXO, another Shack Horde member. Axons Amok 03:13, 16 October 2006 (BST)

PS Stay classy -DanteSck 03:49, 16 October 2006 (BST)

Have faith. As after Thermopylae the hordes of Xerxes invaded Greece, and marched to Athens. And the Persians burned the fields and the buildings, and leveled the Acropolis in retribution for the Battle of Marathon and for Thermopylae where many Persians fell. But though many of the Athenians fell defending the temple to the death, many more escaped to safety. For the Athenians had many allies, and Thermopylae had inflamed the hearts of Greece. And though Athens fell Hellas was now a Nation. And you can quote me on that... Tyler Whitney0 03:53, 16 October 2006 (BST)

If you're likening the Persian hordes of Xerxes to our ShackHorde, and Greece to the humans defending Ackland Mall, there's a few things you need to recognize. At Thermopyle, the Greek army was vastly outnumbered by that of the Persians; at Ackland Mall, humans outnumber zombies 3-to-1. At Thermopyle, the Greeks cunningly chose their location to great advantage, thereby denying the Persians the advantage of massed forces; at Ackland, you present four separate fronts on which you must defend yourselves. And if you're trying to imply that Ackland Mall is something behind which all humans will eventually rally... well, I think the Battle of Blackmore was more epic than our current siege at Ackland Mall. And look how that turned out: cleared and ransacked a few hours after we had finished at Nichols Mall.
Poor analogies aside, our Horde really does think very highly of Ron's news updates. In fact, it's inspired a lot of Horde to try and learn how to read, instead of just ripping down barricades, opening doors and eating brains. DeathToSpam 04:54, 16 October 2006 (BST)

I wasn't suggesting a fall back to caigar. That was intended towards the fallen who either chose to ignore your advice or didn't have time to implement it. carcasses only. It's just that there are more survivors there with easy access to syringes that anywhere else in malton, thus letting us revive faster and not make people go across two suburbs to revive us. We have done it in previous Battle's for the Bear Pit and it would be completly temporary, and once it was done, glorious battle for would undoubtedly follow. vanis314 12:27, 16 October 2006 (BST)

The Blackmore has been pretty universally compared to Thermopylae. If you look back I was comparing Ackland to the burning of Athens that occured once the 300 spartans were defeated. Implying of course, that we should be putting on our own Salamis or a Platea. Both of which occured after Thermopylae as well. I'm just really digging how our half-assed historical analogy is continuing to relevent. And Ron, we don't need a Leonidas. We had plenty at the Blackmore. We need a Themistocles. As at Salamis, many council a full retreat, but Themistocles (through bribery, trickery, statecraft, and inspired military genius) created a massive Greek victory. Tyler Whitney0 13:00, 16 October 2006 (BST)

Thank you...

...for that revive you gave DJSpinbad. Now I feel like I owe you even more now...Here's a money tree as a token of my appreciation....and in-game...I'll be more productive for the wait and see.

Money tree.jpg Money Tree
Money Really Does Grow On Trees!

--Axe Hack 02:09, 17 October 2006 (BST)

Call to Arms

Ron, once again the zombie hordes are threatening our way of life. I may be but one man, and my organization may be quite small, but I want to make this official.

As of this moment, Viva La Humanity declares its full and total support to the Channel 4 News Team! I am currently on my way to Ackland to assist in the rescue/evacuation of the mall under siege there. My trusty shotgun Bubba is looking forward to giving "classy" lessons to the unwashed and non-pulsed members of Malton.

The broadcast I mentioned earlier is available upon our groups Wiki page. It may be crude as I was in the full heat of passion when I wrote it. It seems I've fallen into the bad books with your friend Wes Mantooth for adding my vocal support. Oh well. Him and his kind will know TRUE justice at the end of Posieden's Trident!—The preceding unsigned comment was added by Mark Hazzyrd (talkcontribs) .

Shacknews Strategy

Just wondering if you feel that combat revives would be effective against Shacknews? I know you mentioned they're young zombies, that means they probably haven't developed enough survivor skills do much damage? -- LJ 27

  • I think this is a smashingly good idea. Please to be spending syringes on Shacknews zombies. MisterPhoton 20:25, 23 October 2006 (BST)

Yes, actually, I think the combat revive is one of the best ways to get them. A "good candidate" for a combat revive is a low level zombie with no survivor skills who will end up dead again very quickly and at the cost of a lot of AP. This is Shacknews through and through. Of course, there are those who say it's an Unclassy tactic and that's worth something. There's also a good point to be made that it's a waste of a revive; you could have helped get another survivor on his feet and that's another way to defeat Shacknews. There are only so many of them and, since their strength comes in punching thorugh a defence again and again until there are no people left to defend, you might be able to at least reach a war of attrition with a really, really effective revive plan (one which revives as many as the zombies kill each day). Of course, that's damn near impossible.

Ultimately, I think the combat revive is the best option of the two, but that's only if you've got a large number of people doing it- enough to slow them down sufficiently. Since that's a near impossibility, the best option in the real world seems to be to accept what's coming and take it standing! Keep the revives for survivors so more people can do so! Make for more combatants and, therefore, a more Glorious Battle!

Stay Classy! --Ron Burgundy 06:58, 24 October 2006 (BST)

1st Shacknews Push on Caiger!!

Shacknews attacked at around 9:20 tonight. I dove into Latrobe with 49 ap. I barricaded to lightly, I shot zombies, I barricaded to lightly, I revived a fallen Bastard I recognized, I healed myself many many times (not to save my hide just to soak up claw slashes that would have gone to some poor sleeping Caigerite). I barricaded to lightly. I died...

When I checked fifteen minutes later another Bastard had revived me. I Healed myself, I went inside, Many bodies lay on the floor, I barricaded to lightly, I attracted more zombies, I barricaded to lightly, I ap'ed out and dove back into Caiger.

Sweet Ares, there's just something about this place that brings out the best in me... Hopefully the Caigers'll remember themselves. Tyler Whitney0 03:09, 24 October 2006 (BST)

Latrobe is clear again and total losses seem to be around the 30's. Hardly a serious dip when compared to the awesome revive potential Caiger Mall has demonstrated in the past (Kudos to you sir). The only trick might be setting up that rhythm again, and the right words from certain sources (hint) could do wonders for that. And if all else fails, we can always point the Caigerites towards Blackmore for revives and Payback. Tyler Whitney0 04:23, 24 October 2006 (BST)


Ron trying to get in touch with you, drop me a line on the DHPD secure channels

Jeff Oneil 17:16, 24 October 2006 (BST)

2nd Shacknews Push on Latrobe

Upwards of 70 zombies attacked around 8:20 tonight. At the start of the attack there were around 90 survivors in the building. Post-attack numbers are roughly 60 right now (close to where they were this time last night). It's likely that several survivors saw the attack occuring and dove into Caiger rather then risk death and add to the revive lines. It's also likely that several Caigerites rushed to Latrobe and then died while putting down all 70 zombies and rebarricading the building within an hour or two. In any case 30 dead seems a conservative estimate for the likely losses one might expect from an immediate Shacknews hit. That is, if the survivors have pre-warned reinforcements waiting to pounce as it appears there were tonight.

The good news is that during a run out to the revive points earlier today I saw only 3 zeds standing. One of those was a Shacknews decoy. On the ground were over 60 reviving bodies. The Caiger revivers are definitely backing up their well-earned reputation. Numbers within the mall havn't seemed to drop and the most populous corner has shown a substantial increase in the past week.

As for being in the middle of a Shacknews attack I have this to say: There's no way to put up the barricades fast enough to keep them out. Not unless you have an equal number of active people stacking cubicle walls on top of each other. The best bet I've seen is to try to soak up as many of their ap as possible. That means stacking the barricades higher and higher and forcing them to tear them down to open the way for their friends rather than chomping on your buddy's skull. They target the active players so healing yourself to temporarily boost the "meat shield" is also a valid plan. As more Caigerites log in and hear of the active attack they'll do the killing and dumping. The important thing is making sure that horde doesn't get down to the chewy center of that last survivor and tag the building ransacked.

Sorry if this is wicked verbose, just figured people would want a first hand account. I'll try to keep things brief from now on, and only drop you a line if something significant happens. Tyler Whitney0 03:37, 25 October 2006 (BST)

Zombie push on Latrobe repulsed yet again, losses similar to the earlier nights if only very slightly worse (conservative estimate yet again). Shacknews has still yet to taste the pungent bouquet of half-eaten brains and spent shotgun shells that is a major zombie breach into Caiger. They are still monstrously outnumbered and facing an enemy with an absoulutely terrifiying record of major victories. More of my half-assed historical comparisons are sure to come in the coming weeks. Tyler Whitney0 03:52, 26 October 2006 (BST)

Latrobe Overrun

Ron, I think Caiger may be in dire straights. Latrobe and Sweeney NTs have fallen, the Herman building might be gone as well. Without NTs we're sure to lose. The problem is nobody wants to risk staying in an NT when Caiger is safer, but without survivors inside they're quickly cleared, ransacked, and occupied. Better a few people die each day in NT breaches then the supply of syringes get shut. I'm hoping you can think of a way to convince a large number of people to take one of those three NTs by storm...and then stay there. --Jon Pyre 09:19, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

Sure the building was overrun but let's be realistic. When Latrobe fell there were barely half as many survivors inside as there were at the start of the siege. And even then the numbers inside were only a fraction of its usual garrison during a major siege (109 compared to the 200+ in past sieges). So Shacknews broke into a building with less than 60 survivors in it. Not so big a deal. They've done it many times before, and the revive queue's are still active. Talk to me again when survivor losses for a night break 100. The worst consequence is that this forces survivors to go farther (further? where are the grammarians?) afield to find their syringes. Again, if the hordes of Caigerites are encouraged it might work to our advantage. It would force Shacknews to split their attention between half a dozen necrotechs (keeping them from forming the massive concentrated attacks that have become their specialty). And every day they spend chasing down Necrotechs, and every strike group they leave behind to occupy them is that much less they can hit the swelling ranks of the CMS with. My last count put nearly 1200 survivors in the mall with Giap knows how many guerillas hiding in Darvall, Chudleyton, and Greater Becktown.

Anyway, here's hoping that the 5th keeps the RRF from reinforcing Shacknews and vice versa. Tyler Whitney0 21:57, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

Yeah, I heard about that and I've been thinking about sending the News Team to help out holding an NT specifically. I'd like to give it a bit more time to see how things play out. You know, to make sure we're needed. I'd hate to join a fight that's already got all the numbers on the survivor side. The Caigers wouldn't have to go very far for a working NT, but it is Caiger, so you never can tell. Anyway, I'm keeping a close eye on things and if they take a turn for the worse, we'll be around! At this rate, I think we'll probably end up dividing our forces to hit both Ridleybank and Caiger, keeping the former as skirmishes and the latter as support. Of course, I've got to see how the 5th of November thing turns out, too. --Ron Burgundy 06:32, 5 November 2006 (UTC)

Herro my classy friend

Helluva fight we put up my friend. Especially the charge on the fourth to clear blackmore out. Your hair looked perfect whilst killing those rotted bastards! Stay classy --dickhole guy

Alternate Revive Point

I see that a new revive point is needed for the dead defenders of Caiger Mall. Well, me and my small group have been maintaining a cemetery [13,23] west of The Loder Museum in central Chudleyton. Nearby is the NT Harraway Building for syringes. At the moment everything is all and well, powered and 'caded. I understand it is a fair distance from the mall, but it makes sense to have a major revive point some ways from the mall as to not attract a large zambah presence. What say you, Ron Burgundy??--Ducis DuxSlothTalk 03:33, 19 December 2006 (UTC)

Wiki templates

Ron, I need help, I want to make the ranger template one where you can go {{}} how do I do that?

Good Luck

Good luck with finals and, egad, Sartre. Have yerself a 16 year old Lagavulin after its over. (as the "aristrocrat of Islays", I believe it is up to your standards) - Zizanie13 05:31, 13 December 2006 (UTC)

DHPD Uppill Precinct

I'm cheif of Uppill, if you're going after Caiger, please contact me... we need to discuss how to go about this... and I need to be in on it, being that I gotta make sure Oxley is secure when we move in... you know why... PS: Sorry for being so blunt and I daresay [breath] 'unclassy' but I've been sitting in Dunell since caiger fell while my precinct is in the hands of those b****rd RRF zeds... they moved in to take us out and Caiger lost it's last and most reliable rev source... then the end came... --Marty Banks (aka. Mundane) <DHPD> 08:43, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

Ron 4 Mod

I nominated you for mod! you deserve it! If you want it post there, if not, thats cool, post there and say so, your pal--Dickholeguy 19:56, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

Yaknow, I understand your desire to step down from being a mod. Thats a lot of work and hassle you probably don't want or need. But would you perhaps accept an nomination to Bureaucrat? We've only got three of them, and only one active one...and I can't think of anyone who wouldn't be more worth the nomination. It'd at least keep the loveable Xoid on his toes....unless you actually are Xoid. ;) --MorthBabid 18:24, 4 December 2006 (UTC)
Ron never was a sysop, so he can't "step down" and he would have to be a sysop before he could be a 'crat so no, he can't be nominated for Bureaucrat.--Gage 18:26, 4 December 2006 (UTC)
Hm. That awkward cycle of life may be why we have so few 'Crats. But understood.--MorthBabid 17:58, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Your attention is requested

Please check your PM's on the DHPD Internal Communications board. DHPD-PRC FmrPFCBob 02:31, 13 November 2006 (UTC)

your last update on the blackmore battle might be a little too bright: last counnt i saw was 50 humans to 100+ zeds, gave a warm welcome to two of your buddies befor dragging them out to meet the family.--Zbmainiac 04:59, 22 November 2006 (UTC)


Thanks for the picture. I may have to put good use to it. Anyway, the RRF is running out of strike teams for the "Better Know a Strike Team" feature in the H&S. I was wondering if, in a couple of weeks or so, you were up to being interviewed for a modified feature, "Better Know an Enemy"? Barhah! -- Murray Jay 11:33 AM EST, 9 November 2006.

Thanks for getting back to me I sent you a PM on the RRF forums (you still have an active account, right?) -- -- Murray Jay 5:37 pm EST, 11 November 2006

Operation Backhand

We'll we're doing our part... We've kept roughly 300 from joining the Seige by keeping them focused on Cotty and the Precincts in West Beck and Molebank. Hows your Part of the Op? Conndrakamod TDHPD CFT 20:04, 9 November 2006 (UTC)

A bit o' misinformation for the Wiki crawlers don't you know...Conndrakamod TDHPD CFT 08:28, 11 November 2006 (UTC)

Caiger Mall Update

Well Ron, the unthinkable has happened. In a historic yet gruesome event Shacknews was succesful in taking and Ransacking the Northwest corner of Caiger Mall tonight. At last count over three hundred zombies filled the mall. The Bell has tolled for The Caigerites and Shacknews are the ringers. The rest of the mall will surely fall. Had they but listened to your advice and moved to reclaim Latrobe or Holloms things would be different. But Many Congratulations to the Shacknews group for doing what so many others could not.SniffleNose 12:29am 10 November 2006 (MST)

A 'Dear Ron Burgundy' Letter

Dear Ron Burgundy,

Looking at these dire times through the bottom of a bottle of Lagavulin and the haze of 6,000 now burning rubber trees, I need the calm reassurance of your perfect, non-offensive Midwestern American lack-of-accent to know how to feel about Shacknews' " The only thing unusual about Shacknews in that respect is that our external community is uniquely suited to perform synchronous operations in an asynchronous game. It's not much different than if a group of friends were communicating and coordinating using instant messages while playing, except that there are 100-150 of us acting at one time." hostile takeover of Caiger Mall. ( A direct quote from the crap hurricane I acidentally started on the Shack talk page...)

If an 'organized' defence can't withstand 1000 meta-gaming zeds, how can a mom-and-pop liquor store, the Malton Stained Glass and Hotdog Shop, or my local cinema? What is to be done? Is it now the lot of the survivor to wander about Malton like a lost New Yorker in the desert? I like being asynchronous! It was the best album never released by the Police. I'll just crack open another looted bottle of hooch and wait for your pearls of wisdom.

Sincerely, Ignatz 13:07, 10 November 2006 (UTC) p.s. Love your hair.

Guest Columns for the Channel 4 News Team

Why Caiger Mall Fell

I was planning on putting a link on the CMS page, but I thought you might do the same for the C4NT if you were so inclined. I've got big big big plans for the CMS in any case, and those'll be out in a short while.

What We Can Do About It! Tyler Whitney0 01:28, 11 November 2006 (UTC)

And excellent use of the verb "sack." I compliment you sir.

Blackmore Strategies

I've been thinking of ways to mobilize the brigade at Blackmore (where I have now joined the illustrious majority of C4NT). First we should obviously keep Blackmore as long as possible. But if we are being overwhelmed we shouldn't stay put and hope for the best. Caiger's demise taught me that hiding in your bunker doesn't work. I have a few ideas for your consideration:

1. Determine numerous fallback positions and endeavour to keep them clear. Ridleybank has an abundance of hospitals. I suggested designating these and the two police departments as our fallback positions. However we have to assume that this plan and any other plan will be known to zombies. So we'll randomize our attacks. Only focus on clearing and having a skeleton crew of defenders just to stave off ransacking whatever 3 resource buildings have the fewest zombies at any one time. If they break-in and occupy one heavily we'll immediately give it up and focus on the resource buildig they abandoned when they moved to the new one. Have scouts keep people in Blackmore regularly apparaised of which three hospitals have the lowest zombie population inside and out. If Blackmore is ever taken do the same thing, dividing most of our people among the hospitals and instructing them to surrender it and occupy another hospital as soon as a horde begins to build.

With any luck this strategy will not give us an escape route and a steady supply of FAKs but also pull zombie attention away from Blackmore and focus on killing the small groups in hospitals instead. Many hospital defenders will die but we'll be able to revive them all rapidly.

2. Prevent the overbarricading of entry points by moving our revive point inside St. Theo's church. Use Ransack to our advantage and instruct everyone to move in there and prevent it from being barricaded by Death Cultists while they wait for revives. If we ever revive everyone inside and it gets barricaded up have our zombie dead break down the church's barricades for us and wait outside the church as a secondary revive spot until they can get in.

3. Supply lines to distant NTs. Set up a task force to maintain control of at least one Necrotech in an adjacent suburb. We'd pick whichever area was most secure and relocate to another suburb's NT (leaving together, traveling together, and staging a joint assault to clear out any Z) as soon as zombies start to congregate outside in significant numbers. Keep the defenders in Ridleybank aware of which NT is being held at any given point by radio. Should Blackmore ever fall people will be able to travel back and forth, spending some AP on travel but keeping the revive lines open.

Keep up the good work!

Up until after, the fall of Caiger, lol, when did that happen? We were trying to save the northern area of Darvall when to our and Zod's dismay we came across little support from others [most survivors left]. We could not hold onto the very precious NT's either. Everyone we tried to hold, fell. So when the majority of us had taken zombie form it was decided that we shall aid you en masse. We have mostly regrouped and are in good spirits. Darvall Heights is calling us back, back to our homes, but some of us see other oppotunities elsewhere. Personally I would like to stay and see this battle to the end. You have my full and utter support in trying to hold Blackmore and startegic locations regarding the supply of Blackmore's defenders. We CDF are few in numbers but make up for it in Fierceness. If you need anything feel free to ask. Good friend, godspeed and good luck! --1 4 of CDF 07:45, 18 November 2006 (UTC)


I have been cleaning up the pages that relate to the different battles over Caiger Mall, and I need your help. There are two pages with history pertaining to the second battle of caiger mall. First, there is the Second Siege of Caiger Mall and then there is the Chronicle of the Second Siege of Caiger Mall. Having two pages to do one thing is just stupid in my opinion. I want to consolidate them. Either way, I will delete the second one. I am just wondering on which page the history is more accurate, because on the final page I want to include only the best information on the wiki. I wasn't there at the battle, so could you help me make the call? Leave what you think on my talk page. I am asking a few others who were involved their opinion too. Thanks.--Gage 05:31, 15 November 2006 (UTC)


Thought you'd like to know, we finally got a few Shacknews folks in Yagoton, but not a whole slew of them. Some are ferals, others are from a few local groups. They're fixating on Hospitals in the SW corner of Yagoton currently, rather than the YRC...but Shacknews has shown a penchant for softening up resources around their true target. I'll keep you posted. --MorthBabid 09:13, 16 November 2006 (UTC)

Just a quick update from yer ole Buddy SniffleNose, Bale Mall has joined the group of malls that the Shacknews Horde has taken. As of this writing there are less than 15 humans left in the mall. This Horde is on a Rampage. SniffleNose 18:21, 21 November 2006 (UTC)
Yes, and while we're slowly recovering, Southern Yagoton could use a wee bit of help. The YRC is struggling to re-assert itself and revive the fallen. --MorthBabid 08:50, 28 November 2006 (UTC)

An Unlikely Turn of Events

I know this is old hat, but the mall did fall. But can the zombies keep it? This won't be the first survivor siege on a location, but it will be the most humorous. - 343 U! 16:22, 21 November 2006 (UTC)

Today We Spell Redemption C-A-I-G-E-R

Let's get this show started. Be Ike to my DeGaulle. Regardless of all that rubbish and chest beating for the CMS the News Team and the NMC are the most motivated and mobile badasses in the game. You're America, not much can be done without you. So let's get this thing rolling. There are only 100+ zeds inside the mall. We've taken on worse in an afternoon with time left over to play stunning yaz flute solos. There are however hundreds more digging into in Greater Caiger. They're all going to collapse onto the mall the minute we step back inside. I'm telling the CMS to rally in Dunell Hills. It's wicked close and probably the most secure location in the region. Plus the flatfoots can watch our backs while we muster. As for taking back the mall I have two words: Necrotech Hopping. - Tyler Whitney0 02:10, 28 November 2006 (UTC)


Last I saw you; you were at the mall taking pictures with the newbies! Oh and Happy Holidays! --Virus002 03:16, 29 November 2006 (UTC)

The Progression of the Inevitable

I figure the most productive and dangerous thing we could do now is to set a date. Setting a fixed date can result in magnificent results as we saw in Ridley post-Nov. 5th. Several hundred survivors in an unfriendly area within a day. That's the advantage of setting a date for a major push.

The disadvantage is, of course, that the zeds see it too and organize against our machinations. In our case for Caiger I'd argue for it. Caiger lends itself towards trenchcoats and the philosophically uncomplex (sp?). We need those rookies who are willing to kill 4 zombies then sleep in a corner. We need them to clean out the mall for the more experienced and cautious (and effective) survivors. Anyway, once I have some bright ideas I'll share them either here or the nmc forums. Tyler Whitney0 04:31, 2 December 2006 (UTC)

This may be of interest to C4NT

This message was posted on my talk page, but it seems something that may be more right up C4NT's alley:

This message is sended to all LCD allies. Please check Survivor Security Zone. Thank you. Juan Rico 16:20, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

An impressive and far-reaching plan that could work, but won't be achieved overnight. If at all! Kudos to those attempting it, though. --MorthBabid 18:05, 4 December 2006 (UTC)


I'm seeing a little resistance from the CMS' old guard. It appears they're not big fans of my whole "organization" and "a plan" concepts. It's probably not especially malicious, they're just wanting to keep things in the forums. Except I'm not seeing much of anything being done in the forums... Anyway, I'm still telling those who've signed on to gather in Dunell Hills.

Politics aside, I've reorganized the CMS strike groups into The Darvalls, andThe Chudleys. Feel free to spread the word. What I figure we should be doing now is setting a date. The zed/survivor ratio is swinging in our favor so we should milk that while we can. The CMS'll be there at the head of the Forlorn hope. So I guess I'll see you in the food court. Tyler Whitney0 22:07, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Shacknews is at it again

Hiya Ron, it's yer pal Snifflenose again. The Shacknews horde is up to thier old tricks again in Shearbank. They just took over the Necrotech 1 north of Stickling Mall, The Whippey Building. In true Shacknews fashion they assaulted the building for just under two weeks and ransacked it last night with the aid of various ferals and a couple other groups (RFF GMT ect). One can only assume that Stickling is about to fall prey to the horror that is Shacknews. SniffleNose 19:42, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Update - So Stickling has fallen. As of 2:03 am EST the Horde ransacked the SW corner of Stickling mall. The PTT evacuated shortly thereafter and the mall is now home to hundreds of the foul Undead. Will no one stand against the juggernaut that is the Shacknews Horde? SniffleNose 16:04, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

I love a good fight

My quarrel with Agent White has gotten to ridiculous proportions. I just felt I had to share it with someone. I love this kid, I really do. It's looking like the CMS is going to become even more defunct then we all feared, despite everyone's best intentions. Tyler Whitney0 00:56, 9 December 2006 (UTC)

DUDE!! Excellent summation of Sartre! College is overrated anyway. You're better off picking a quiet corner of New England and spending a couple years reading a thousand books. Come to think of it, that's exactly what 90% of college is (minus the delicious alcohol and endless debates about the Zombie Apocalypse). Anyway, have faith. I know tons of people who've gotten vicious degrees with less of a sense of humor, or grasp for the English language than you've demonstrated. Go and kick some term papers' asses. Tyler Whitney0 07:55, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

Being and Nothingness

I have plenty of Faith in you Ron... I read it in about 5 hours in Highschool... and if Nothing else can give you most of what you need. Good Luck and Stay Classy. Conndrakamod TDHPD CFT 22:45, 10 December 2006 (UTC)

Dear Mr. Burgundy

The Malton Zookeepers would like to request the honor of an on-the-air interview with you during our upcoming telethon in support of recently proposed upgrades to the Zoo area. We are open to either an in-studio event or a satellite link, whichever is easier for you, and are willing to work around your schedule. Please leave a message on my discussion page, or leave us a note at our website so we can discuss the details. I'm looking forward to talking to you! --Lo Meng 08:34, 13 December 2006 (UTC)

Welcome Back

I was sort of comissioned to type up this by Peter Steele of the CMS leadership. It just might be the classiest thing I ever stole from a founding father. Not counting, John Adams' jade pimping cane, but I think the American Heritage Institute is still after me for that. Seriously, the whole thing smells of rich mahaugoney (sp?). I might revise it later, but if you think it's any good post a link like the last two articles. Tyler Whitney0 04:06, 20 December 2006 (UTC)

Mahogany - I'd correct your comment, but that'd bring the wrath of the mods down on me. --_Vic D'Amato__Dead vs Blue_ 04:07, 20 December 2006 (UTC)

Nice to see you back Ron. Stay Classy! :D --Specialist290 19:24, 27 January 2007 (UTC)

Copyright Drama

hey ron. Akule is trying to delete some images used by C4NT in his Copyright madness... take a look at the deletions page and you will see... --People's Commissar Hagnat [cloned] [mod] 14:40, 25 December 2006 (UTC)

Requesting Your Vote

Hi Ron! I'm trying to generate support for this suggestion. It's one of those "make PKing a little fairer" concepts and if you think it's aok it could sure use your keep vote. Thanks, and happy new year! --Jon Pyre 04:20, 2 January 2007 (UTC)

I guess we're allies now...

Oi, remeber me? I've stopped being a zombie, and have now joined DHPD. Friends?--DHRR10 18:46, 27 January 2007 (UTC)

Can't find "a single damn place" with enough Zombies to kill?

"I can't find a single damn place with enough Zombies to kill." Wow, I'm shocked Ron, I really am. I don't think you'll have that problem for much longer.--Xyu 12:29, 28 January 2007 (GMT)

Ron, if you're still looking there's some good action up around Bale. The mall just fell and was retaken last week. I'm sure if C4NT showed up in force it'd spark a hell of a battle. --Jon Pyre 06:02, 2 February 2007 (UTC)

Operation Desirable Aardwolf

(Put this bit here and on he Channel 4 News talk page to make sure it's seen.)

Dear Ron, Tovarisch, and company. You probably haven't met or heard of my group, the Aardwolf Rangers, but we fought side by side in Blackmore 2, and the recent Battle of Sticklinggrad. We can also take a goodly sum of credit for restoring Giddings Mall a mere 3 days after Mall Tour '07 ransacked it. I couldn't help but notice your cunning plan involves diving head first into the hell pit that is Yagoton, and I like it. We shall come, because Pitneybank no longer needs us. We may only be in the single digits as a group; but I think you're going to need as many people as you can to pull this off, so try and stop us. Good luck, and may your tridents burn eternally! Redwave 04:21, 16 March 2007 (UTC)

Some Form Of Classy Heading

Your classy recruitment ad was removed due to inactivity. --Cap'n Silly T/W/P/CAussieflag.JPG 08:38, 28 February 2007 (UTC)


(Reproduced from the C4NT talkpage, just to make sure you see it.)

I know everyone's probably tired of hearing about Caiger Mall, but I'd like to get some publicity for this. It's a fairly well thought-out plan (IMHO), and if it works I'm hoping to use its principles as a model for the other Malls as well. Stay Classy! :D --Specialist290 03:57, 10 February 2007 (UTC)

Actually, right now I'm in the same building as you are, but I wandered over to Stickling late last night. Considering every building I passed by in Darvall Heights had an open door (including the Herman Building, where I started out from), I'd say the fall was pretty total. --Specialist290 23:37, 10 February 2007 (UTC)


Hey Ron! You might know me, ol' Barbecue Barbecue, from the wiki. In any case, I understand from MorthBabid's talk page a lot of your folk are heading over to the YRC for revives just now. You might notice that, according to all reliable maps of Malton, my home of Shuttlebank is just to the west of Yagoton. And, let me tell you, we're in pretty rough shape due to a recent smackdown by the EF and other ferals. Mind you, there's not a lot of zombies in total, but without organized opposition (which is being worked on for future efforts), we've pretty much lost everything. If there's any way you and yours could see passing through South Shuttlebank on your next outing, just to deliver a hearty "hello" to the occupying forces, I can't tell you how much obliged we'd be. --Barbecue Barbecue 02:24, 24 February 2007 (UTC)


Ron, I've gotta disagree with your cunning plan. In my experience? Yagoton survives by good people working for the best of all that is Yagoton. Yes, we love the Whatmore Building...but we love being alive more. We can't put our love of the clinic ahead of the people we serve. The YRC isn't just a place, its an idea that has drawn an insane amount of love from Yagoton for...hell, as long as I've been in Malton. And we've got to take care of those people first. I'd suggest focusing our efforts instead upon the Style Building and Harkness Street revive point. It'll allow us to also work on securing Bale Mall to keep health and ammo flowing for those fighting the good fight. What say you? --MorthBabid 20:48, 14 March 2007 (UTC)

The James Earl Jones Awards

JEJ.jpg JEJ Nomination
Ron Burgundy has been nominated to win the Best Survivor Award.
JEJ.jpg JEJ Nomination
Ron Burgundy has been nominated to win the Best Male of Urban Dead Award.
JEJ.jpg JEJ Winner
Ron Burgundy has won the Best Survivor Award.


pay attention, i am trying to contact you, hard since you have no cell and theres no radio in whatmnore.--Darkmagic 02:18, 3 March 2007 (UTC)

Don't hassle the man too hardcore, Dark. Last I heard, Ron was having trouble of his own. But yeah, Yagoton IS taking a bit of a beating atm. If anyone could be spared from C4NT, it'd be appreciated. --MorthBabid 17:09, 4 July 2007 (BST)

Something Random!

Here, I made this for you:

Ron Comic.PNG

Hope you liked it!--Lachryma 06:59, 21 March 2007 (UTC)

Yes, things are bad...

Very bad, perhaps as bad as they've ever gotten. In times like these we need inspiring leadership, and just as importantly, inspiring mythos. The flag-raising on Iwo Jima, the commander of the AEF marching straight to the tomb and telling Paris "Lafayette nous avons ici!" For that purpose I present you with [THIS] to be used in whatever manner you deem best. Time to put some sand back in the survivors' trousers.

hey ron, i need some help...

i'v formed a, overcast organization, its like what the zeds did with on strike, but, not a severe, i need some help making it look classier, since i can't do that on wiki's... i'd also like you to join, the way the group works is that you are both a member and not a member, its liek signing a petition, this one to make the game actuly be balanced in a way that we get the good updates to. look for Viva la revolution--Darkmagic 00:03, 27 March 2007 (BST)

Ackland under attack again

I don't know the military term for it, but we need your help over here.--Cold Feet 03:42, 22 June 2007 (BST)

Rat for you!

Rat-ah-tat-tat.jpg Here, have a rat!
P02 Samuel has given Ron Burgundy a rat for being one helluva newscaster.

well, since i can't post on the NMC forums.. and this is the only way now, well, hm... where to begin?

how are you recently, havn't seen you much, your like a zed, lying down in wait lol.--Darkmagic 01:52, 1 September 2007 (BST)

Ron Burgundy

i have to ask you some stuff.--Darkmagic 17:54, 20 October 2007 (BST) 1: unban me from the forum, the proxies already banned from another user

2: where you been!!!

3: damn we needed you in the Battle Of Yagoton the 5 month battle where we fought back after a massive zed raid litterly shut the entire suburb down.

4: You think my groups page looks ok?--Darkmagic 14:23, 24 October 2007 (BST)

Ron Burgundy!

Glad to have you back. Name the field of battle, and there i will be to fight against ya. :D --People's Commissar Hagnat [cloned] [mod] 22:37, 24 October 2007 (BST)

Welcome back, Ron :D I've been on a little hiatus myself... --Specialist290 03:14, 29 October 2007 (UTC)

I'll see if I can make it if I don't have any of my alts already in the area. As far as the long view goes, of course, I probably won't be too involved in helping come up w/ Cunning Plans, though, since I'm still facing down the many-headed Hydra of Schoolwork in RL... I'll see what I can do to help, though. --Specialist290 03:40, 29 October 2007 (UTC)

--tomer 09:01am, 19 april 2008 (UTC)

the south is clearing

well ron its clearing out im advising people to move south me and 3 of my teamates are watching the hord from darvall hights if yall have any body thats out there that needs help in the area tell them to go to Wheelhouse Auto Repair [26, 23 theres only 5 of us alive out here also tell them we need guns and medical badly --tomer 09:01am, 22 april 2008 news 9

Hydra Defense

As someone who frequently gets PKd I thought you might be interested in a new anti-PKer idea I invented called the Hydra Defense. Let me know what you think of it, and if you like it I wouldn't mind help publicizing it. --Jon Pyre 17:27, 28 December 2007 (UTC)


On December 18, 07, RB is gunned down by an unaffiliated pk'er in Perryn armory whose only words are "Don't be here when I come back, scum."

bullgod interview

I had the good fortune of spotting Feral Undead founder bullgod near Fort Perryn and he agreed to an interview shortly before dying and infecting me. It's here if you would like to read or add it to any list of C4NT reports somewhere. And thanks for your help outside the fort! GrabAzz grabbed mine and pulled me out onto the street, and I was so dazed I couldn't act for several hours while various people attacked and healed me. --Jon Pyre 23:25, 9 December 2007 (UTC)

So I did make a big post...

And then my router broke, and now it's gone like a slippery silly putty ball down a dogs throat. The gist of it was I led the Aardwolf Rangers into battle alongside the NMC for the entire time you were gone, and that it was the charismatic and hilarious depictions of C4NT and its battles that led us all to play in the first place. Now that we're gone you come roaring back into town like one of the four horsemen.

Anyway, Pegton has lots of Zombies to kill, and you look to be shopping for targets at the moment. Redwave 02:17, 14 November 2007 (UTC)

Welcome Back!

I look forward to hunting you like an animal. --ZaruthustraMod 06:31, 8 November 2007 (UTC)

True to my word I am now upon you Burgundy. I thought it classy to warn you before hand so you could make peace with Odin or any other such arrangement. Here was the late night promo broadcast on channel 4 if you missed it.

"Greetings channel 4 listeners. When other networks were airing dead static or "Evacuation Procedure Broadcasts" KVWN 4 Malton continued to provide the finest in emergency frequency news and entertainment. In keeping with this tradition of excellence (and due to flagging ratings and the mysterious cut off of our script airdrops) we are proud to announce Malton's newest hit show, "Anchor Manhunt: The Death of Ron Burgundy". Parolled sociopath, cult leader, and work release prisoner Zaruthustra will be stalking our very own emmy award winning anchor Ron Burgundy through the streets . There'll be action, drama, and probably a few cheap shots with a sharpened pool cue. So tune in for daily updates at 4 AM GMT. Thats KVWN Malton, 27.04 on your radio dial!" --ZaruthustraMod 10:16, 30 November 2007 (UTC)

Word, from your Socialist homies

As an awesome person (of distinguishable excellence), I assume that you are a Socialist/Communist and actively work to cause the downfall of the bourgeois. As a fellow member of the proletariat, I suggest we both grow lengthy beards and spread the word of equality throughout Malton. I would be honored to have you by my side, lecturing young Marxists and keeping the zombie capitalists at bay. Contact me if you are interested. Madmonkey24Talk CPM User ProfileMadmonkeyavatar-1.jpg 22:05, 11 November 2007 (UTC)

Greetings, Hero

Hi Ron, I noticed you lying around in Stanbury Village. I don't know what your plans are for the future, but this Sunday the 9th some members in my group, the Allied Travellers Organisation is having a party at Kersley Mansion, which is not so far from where I spotted you. Perhaps you would like to come? There will be about 8 or 9 people going, all admirers of your classy self. We would be very excited to have you arrive, so excited perhaps we would *message deleted for censorship*

Whether you are interested in coming or not, is there a chance our survivor group may be able to become proud allies of the C4NT? We love you guys... Maybe in time you will love us. Kind regards, DanceDanceRevolution 09:21, 5 December 2007 (UTC)

Oh my, you are such a charmer Ron! I want to wish your fantastic team some good luck in the next Glorious Battle, you may just find us standing tall just alongside you one day. Stay classy, Mr Burgundy! DanceDanceRevolution 02:18, 6 December 2007 (UTC)

From Azzface

How come, Ron? You a hot target for pk'ers? Why's that? You're a nice trenchie!

"I am Rohn Burguhndy AKA supertrenchie." —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Azface (talkcontribs) at an unknown time.


You don't fit the description. You have a sense of humor. Trenchies don't. But you're close.

Anyways, just leaving this message to tell you that I killed you. You were alone in a building, I bought the cades down and ate you. I also added you to my contacts list. Hi! BoboTalkClown 18:33, 21 January 2008 (UTC)


Suggestions created entirely for the purpose of satire, insult, or comedy are considered vandalism and treated appropriately by sysops. If you want to post a joke suggestion put it on the Humorous Page. You are being warned for violating suggestions rule 10. Please dont do it again. The humourous page is there for a reason. --The Grimch U! E! WAT! 13:12, 6 February 2008 (UTC)

I have been championing your cause there Ron - should you decide it might be fun to weigh in.--Squid Boy 15:26, 7 February 2008 (UTC)

The Forum is down!

hey jackhole.... whats the dilly? and this is a bad time for our forum to poop out on us. look into it.----SexualharrisonStarofdavid2.png Boobs.gif 13:44, 25 February 2008 (UTC)

What harrison said, I've had to set up a temporary forum for the Rangers. What happened to the NMC boards?--Lord Wulfgar 19:34, 25 February 2008 (UTC)
Also Ron if the NMC boards have to stay down for an extended period of time we could use the backup forum here I created. It was made as a backup for the Rangers but it could be changed for the entire NMC and of course you and Padre would be admins over the board. Just a thought in case you didn't feel like recreating another new forum entirely, that one is there if you want to use it. Although I'm really hoping our old forum can be restored.--Lord Wulfgar 06:18, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
Ron thanks to Karek the forum may be back up soon, apparently it's some kind of error that the proboards staff are looking into. See Karek's comment on Padre's talk page for more details.--Lord Wulfgar 04:54, 27 February 2008 (UTC)

We Seek Your Help in Glorious Battle!

Greetings Mr. Burgundy! I am the commander of a survivor group known as Phoenix Security Services. We have about 50 active members, and recently recaptured Caiger Mall with the help of the DHPD. We killed alot of zombies, though none of them with a trident. The zombies are massing outside though, and we may not hold much longer without some help. Would it be possible to get some assistance from you guys? We are down to our last scotch, and I fear my men may lose heart. Can you help us in glorious battle Mr. Burgundy?--Dr Doom86 03:42, 27 February 2008 (UTC)

No worries! I was away for awhile too. We all get killed in Caiger Mall, but we looked damn good doing it. We're reviving and regrouping right now, then we'll be ready to fight hordes of zombies again. I tried to register on your guys forum but it was down. Is it back up yet? We would be more than happy to fight alongside the news team-most of our members are attractive enough to be on camera.--Dr Doom86Phoenix2.gif T PSS 19:09, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
Hey Ron. We cant make it to Roftwood at the moment, but perhaps when our current mission is completed we'll link up with you guys. I'll register on your forum and let you know what were up to in a more secure conversation. You can register on ours as well if you want!--Dr Doom86Phoenix2.gif T PSS 10:07, 28 March 2008 (UTC)