UDWiki talk:Open Discussion/Akule vs. The Grimch

Chewbacca Defense

Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, Chef's attorney would certainly want you to believe that his client wrote "Stinky Britches" ten years ago. And they make a good case. Hell, I almost felt pity myself! But, ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!

Why would a Wookiee, an eight-foot tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of two-foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I'm a lawyer defending a major record company, and I'm talkin' about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you're in that jury room deliberatin' and conjugatin' the Emancipation Proclamation, [approaches and softens] does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.

The solution

Grim admits to being a cranky old man, Akule stops trying to be a lawyer, and I get both of their souls. Grim is still allowed to do what ever is within the rights of a normal user (which he was already doing, but who cares, Akule is always right, and we're always wrong), and Akule can still leave a handy little note on peoples talk pages when he spots them uploading copyrighted images. Chewbacca has to go to Kashyyyk, I have to be made ruler of the universe, and everyone gets pie.

Sound like a fair enough deal? If not, who cares?-- dǝǝɥs oʇ ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 11:12, 10 September 2007 (BST)

Im only 22. If i get labelled Cranky Old Man, i want the title Dirty Old Man as well. I can leer and make sexual innuendo just as well as the old timers. --The Grimch ^U! 11:26, 10 September 2007 (BST)

Fair enough. You are a Cranky, Dirty old man. Now what we need is Akule's agreement, which it won't matter if he disagrees or not, because what I say goes.-- dǝǝɥs oʇ ɯɐds: sʎɐʍ1ɐ! 12:17, 10 September 2007 (BST)