User:Two Headed Sex Beast/recruit

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Barhah.com IRC Mibbit Open buildings The Constables Gore Corps Join us!
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The Ridleybank Resistance Front wants you! Are you a lonely zambah, wandering aimlessly through the streets of Malton, tired of bashing cades by yourself and hardly reaching the nammah bra!nz inside? Are you a harman, bored with the inane bickering of your fellow breathers, as they argue for days over who put what on which danger map report? Then join us, the RRF. We want to give you the fun you're searching for!

We are one of the largest, most storied, and successful hordes in the entire city, and have been for literally years. We have been eating bra!nz, zmazh!ng barnz and having a huge blast while doing it since September 2005. We extend a warm hand (in spirit, our actual hands are room-temperature) of welcome to those who wish to escape the Serious Business of other groups, and have a laugh while still being deadly in the field of combat.

Old player with tons of skills? You are most welcome to bring your experience to us. New player without even Ankle Grab? We will feed you until you burst - babahz are one of our special joys to raise, a feeling shared horde-wide. If you like to free-wheel, you can join the main horde, the Department of Homeland Security, and rampage about. Like the coordinated action of strike teams? We have four to choose from at various times of day - Auxunit 10, The Constables, and Team America. Can't quite give up on the ammo and oxygen? The Gore Corps, THE death cultists of Malton, belong to us, and will put your firearm addiction to good use.

And foremost, the Front is a family. We look out for each other in a way many harmanz, and even some zambahz, still have yet to learn. Our leader is Papa in more than just name, and those in command are always approachable with any problems or questions you may have. For as much as you would give to the horde, the horde would give to you. Plus the total lack of pants and the kicking of Serious Business right in the fish-and-chips. We want to have fun, and we want you to have it too. Come and play!


SHOUT OUT TO User:MHSstaff for the layout and design of this recruitment advert, all I did was improve and update the links, and add the strike time table, fuck yeah.