The Malton Observer/Current

Malton Observer: February 28th, 2009

The Malton Observer would like to thank its sponsors:

• Michael Phelps - We solute you.

News at a Glance

Choppers McGee gets reflective

Sonny humbly voices his opinion

The Watchman's final chapter!

News at a Glance

• Mobius Returns to the Dulston Alliance - Hugs!
• Mall Tour Continues - Can no one stop them?
• Entire SE gets Promoted - Because we're awesome.
• Happy Valentine's Day! - Unless you're bitter and alone.
• Nicholas Risto Retires from Saints with 50,193 Bounty Points - Ballads are written on his grand exploits.
• BriAnna Blackmoor Replaces Kristi as DEM Chairwoman - How was this not in the last issue?
• The Watchman Leaves the Malton Observer - The editor's free time cries out in anguish.

The Marshal's Minutes

[Author's note: I no longer an instructor at Darby, and am now out in the field. Therefore, I doubt I will write much about Darby anymore (which gives me more to write about anyway). I also have changed my article name.]

I have been fighting the good fight against the zeds now for nearly 21 months. Quite a while in the Urban Dead world, or so it seems. Now, don't worry, I'm not announcing my retirement or anything of the like. It's just that sometimes I wonder why I keep doing it. Why do I keep coming back for more day after day after day? Is it for duty? Is it for the people I've come to know? I think it's a lot of things.

During my time in the MFD, I've been through quite a bit. Been through all the learning and guidance in the academy, through experience in the trenches right after graduation (in Ridleybank, no less), back to the academy as an Assistant and then Lead Instructor, and then back out to the field once again where I am now. I think my enjoyment comes out of helping those that are new to Malton and new to the MFD (and the DEM as a whole).

I regretfully resigned as Lead Instructor at Darby only a couple of months ago because I was needed in the field. However, my role really has not changed a lot, only that I don't have to explain policy to green cadets anymore and don't have to grade exams. However, it's interesting in that I am now in the position of some of my past firefighters in MFD command, and can kind of understand what role they played when I was fresh out of the academy until I become an Assistant Instructor.

I realize that a lot of this may seem like me rambling out a jumbled mess of an article, but I am very interested in how things change over time in my life. Someday I will no longer be a part of the DEM and no longer part of the battle going on in Malton, and will simply look back to now. I don't necessarily look forward to that time in the future, but I can accept that life goes on no matter what I want it to do.

Until next time,

--Choppers McGee

The Godfather Part II

We recently sat down with Sonny once again to talk about his feud with Garviel Loken and the latest PKer event to be led by DORIS. This is the first time Sonny Corleone has been featured in a sequel.

MO: In a recent interview with the Observer, Garviel Loken stated that all members of the Imperium hate and despise you. He went on to say that every new member is taught their version of the events surrounding the IMD coalition and their invasion of Gibsonton. What is your response to this indoctrination of recruits against you and all of your alts?

Sonny: First off their policy on killing all my characters is alt abuse. So they admit to cheating. What Canderous does is different than what Sonny does and is different than what Anthony does. They don't see the difference, they see the player behind it. This is also bad form on their part. The only time it is socially acceptable to hunt all alts of someone is if they zerg. Imperium is either not smart enough to realize this or they're dirty alt abusers. Them hating me doesn't mean much to me. I've been hated for doing less. If anything its funny how much they hate me because I've turned their relatively unknown group into the largest target out there for no reason other than because I can.

MO: Shortly after the interview went up, you tricked Garviel to publicly apologize for every minor offense committed against you so that the two of you might have a truce - a ruse that set Garviel up for an elaborate burn. Do you honestly have any problem with the Imperium, or do you just troll Loken because he's an easy target?

Sonny: Before I trolled and griefed the Imperium I know absolutely nothing about them. I didn't know much about Garviel except that he was a noob. I'd probably still give him crap for being a noob but because of the whole IMD event I give particular attention to him and the Imperium. And that whole ruse was planned. Garviel being so easy to make fun of doesn't help him. The guy tries to seriously argue that Norse mythology is real and how he sacrifices things to the "gods". Seriously...

MO: Moving away from the Imperium, you're currently mobilizing DORIS to attack the Anti-Zombie Squad and Dawn Patrol. Any particular reason?

Sonny: I had a beef with Eric Bessette, leader of AZS, a long while ago because of some noob thing he did that I no longer remember but then responded with some serious business trenchie response. Before I could organize anything against them I took a break from the game. Then a few days ago Revenant contacted me telling me that he's fighting the Dawn Patrol. I never heard of them but he told me they're allied with the AZS. That was enough for me to get back into the game and troll them. It's going to be harder to get people to fight the AZS because they're not epic fail roleplayers like the Imperium but are your typical trenchie noobs that everyone encounters. Maybe the fact that they support zergers and text rapists (Dawn Patrol) will help people sign up.

MO: So Dawn Patrol was known for harboring text rapists and zergers? Can you verify this?

Sonny: AnimeSucks has a full report on Dawn Patrol members, including their leader zerging. Another member is also in the DEM, they have yet to do anything about it.* When Amber spoke to the on their forums they said some of the most vulgar things anyone has every said in this game. I can't really repeat some of the stuff they've said but the AZS Must Die topic on brainstock has a lot of links to their cheating and vulgarity.

MO: You didn't wait to dedicate this DORIS event to a dead celebrity. Any chance you'll relate it to Michael Phelps' career?

Sonny: Funny story about the Michael Phelps thing, that picture was taken when he was partying at the University of South Carolina. So all of us here are talking about it even though we knew it was going on when he was here several months ago. But yeah, this event, like IMD, is not a DORIS holiday event. It's just a PKer event that DORIS will be involved in. When someone dies we will create an event to retake a suburb. Right now this is just to kill a group.

MO: You have a beef with Raharu. Would you mind explaining what happened?

Sonny: Raharu? My beef with her is simple. I don't believe text raping is bad at all. It's an annoyance that can easily be ignored. If it happens to you a lot by the same person then its sexual harassment. The way she goes on about text rapists is absurd. By making such a big deal out of this and comparing it to real rape you cheapen the severity of real rape. Rape is a horrible, horrible thing. But text on the internet is not the same thing. Even saying it is close to it insults the real victims of the crime. What's worse is that usually it isn't even roleplaying rape, its someone saying "F you you F'in dog. I'll beat the F'in crap out of you and make you cry." I couldn't believe it that trash talk is what they cry about. But my whole beef is that comparing cursing to real rape is like invoking Godwin's Law. The more you compare stupid things to Nazis the less of an impact the word Nazis has. Text rape is not rape and should not be considered even remotely similar. I don't condone it and I think its stupid and pointless but I do not for a second think text rape is as severe or as horrifying as a real rape is.

MO: You've led a lot of different groups - survivors,PKers, and zombies - throughout your time in Malton. Any advice for people starting up new groups?

Sonny: My advice? Listen to me. The biggest problem I see is that when offered advice, new leaders will get insulted and talk about how their 2 weeks in the game is more than my 4 years with this game. I've seen groups rise and fall. I've seen players go from exalted to disgraced. A group must have a theme and originality. That means don't be a kickass group of ex-special forces trying to kill all teh [sic] zombies. Also as leader you shouldn't try to make everything about you. Don't allow people to suck up to you because it just makes people resent you. You're not special because you created the group. I treat everyone in DORIS the same, like crap. I then get treated like crap too. However they all respect my ability to lead. But yeah, what I see a lot are members trying to butter up their leaders and outsiders look down on that. I won't name names but lets just say there's leaders of 404 and the RRF who get nothing but praise from their members but all outsiders think they're jokes and can't lead for squat. So the next time you're thinking of leading a survivor group or a zombie group just make sure you're not like them. One more thing, if your members are ever accused of something like cheating or other bad form activities don't defend them. If they're guilty, throw them to the dogs. Sure you may like them but it'll tarnish your record and ruin your trustworthiness. No one likes cheaters. A certain leader of a zombie group called the RRF, not naming names, refused to throw a certain female who led this subgroup called the Gore Corps to the dogs. Turned out she did cheat and continues to zerg, specifically against them. The leader now looks like a joke to the community for defending her and now has to fight her himself. Etc. etc.

--William Told

*Editor's note: Actions were taken in this instance. The member in question left the DEM until his alt issues were worked out. The concept of zerging was difficult to explain to him due to language barriers, but he no longer has any alt problems.

Quis Custodiet: The Watchman's Journal

I never thought I'd say this, but I'm actually enjoying taking it easy at this point. My real-life has been getting more demanding at times, so I haven't been as zealously pursuing PKers as before. For now, you can say I'm just going on a "sight-seeing" trip around Malton, but of course, when PKers show their faces in front of me, I'm still going to kill them.

I returned to the area where I aided in reconstruction efforts and it's not looking so good once again. I moved to some other suburbs afterwards but they weren't in any better shape. I did find PKers there, though, so that was all right. One I found hiding in a office building. The other, I found hiding in a ruined dark building. Now, which one do you think I chose to kill?

Being the determined lawman I am, or a "hard-ass" as a PKer might say, I killed them both. The first one was a relatively easy kill, even though I ended up wasting some of my ammo, and if I thought I wasted too much ammo taking down the first one, then the second one made me waste much more ammo, but in the end, I still got my man.

The day I claimed this PKer, I had already been spending some time patrolling the suburb, so I didn't have full AP when I took them down. I hadn't been claiming too many bounties recently, and seeing that this one was wounded, I decided that it shouldn't be too hard to kill them, so I moved in the for the kill. I almost managed to kill them, but then my AP ran out.

When this happened, I got worried. From past experience, I knew that by the time my AP recharged, this PKer would either run away, or they'd try to kill me. I waited, and later on in the day, I went to check on my target, and surely enough they did move, but all they did was leave the building, and they got attacked by a zombie, too. So all it took was one shot to kill them.

I stayed safe for a little while longer, but then, I found myself in a situation very similar to that of my previous kill. I was tired, and I decided I was going to rest in an empty dark building Unfortunately, a zombie managed to get in and seriously injure me, rendering me an easy kill for a passing PKer. Karma or just bad luck? Well, my readers, you can decide for yourselves.

--Watchman