StarCake Faction/Zombie Fight 101

Hand-to-hand Combat With Zombies

In order to give you a better idea of the instruction SCF recruits undergo at HQ, we will be presenting excerpts from some of the required training manuals. One of the most important texts to a new recruit is "Hand-to-Hand Combat With Zombies," by Bin-Tao Pan. In the book, Mr. Pan adapts and simplifies martial arts techniques for those likely to be fighting the undead. This excerpt offers a condensed introduction to zombie-fighting, along with a basic, but effective, self-defense move: the Swipe and Strike.

The Five Pillars of Zombie-Fighting

• Never underestimate the zombie

Zombies are not mindless hunters. They are swifter and craftier than one might expect. A lone zombie can burst out of hiding and take a chunk out of you in the blink of an eye.

• Never engage a zombie if you can avoid it

Though zombies are surprisingly quick in confined spaces, they are not swift runners. Engage the zombie only when you are trapped, and escape is not an option.

• Focus on the task; keep fear out of your head

No one, no matter what their powers of description, can fully prepare you for your first encounter with a zombie. Their grotesque appearance and smell, along with the inhuman noises they emit, can induce a level of fear and terror that precludes rational response and causes one to freeze. You must not react to the zombie's appearance. Focus instead on delivering a combination of offensive and defensive strikes that will buy you enough time to escape.

• Do not allow the zombie to get a grip on you

Once a zombie wraps you in its powerful grip, your prospects for survival are minimal. Therefore, your first priority must be deflecting away the zombie's hands.

• Seek medical attention after any encounter

Always have trained medical personnel examine you as soon as possible after any encounter, even if no wounds are visible. The zombie virus can enter your body through the smallest opening in your skin, be it a scraped knuckle or a nicked elbow.

The Swipe and Strike

If a zombie has you cornered, or bursts out at you before you have a chance to run, the swipe and strike is your best bet for escape. The Swipe and Strike is decisive, easily delivered, and by focusing the strike on the nose, it can impair the zombie's most reliable means of locating prey.

Fighting Off a Group of Zombies

Since the majority of zombie encounters involve groups of zombies, it is advisable to stockpile a variety of moves to fight them off. The Mantis is a simple three-step move that is effective and easy to learn. Although the Mantis involves three distinct parts, with practice the three parts will flow together as one.

The Mantis