User:Jay dark one/Hamsters on a bed of nails show
U.D. Radio's most un-famous talk show station since the quarantine with humorous and occasionally real news. each few days a new show will be added in script format from your host Bleexal.
SHOW 1
Bleexal: Welcome to the very first episode of...THE HAMSTERS ON A BED OF NAILS SHOW!!!!!!!!!!! I'm your host Bleexal. Now before we start the show let's go to Jay with the survivor report.
Jay: Well there are still some.
Bleexal: That's good now the zombie report with Michael.
Michael: Me eat your brains.
Bleexal: Sounds good too bad you're restrained.
Michael: *Growl*.
Bleexal: Ha ha ha now for our first guest, jay bring him out.
Jay: We don't have a guest.
- silence*
Bleexal: No seriously bring out the guest.
Jay: We really don't have one.
Bleexal: Well then who am i going to interview?
Jay: I dunno.
Bleexal: Wait I'll interview you.
Jay: Wha...
Bleexal: So survivor Jay what do you do for fun in Malton?
Jay: Well there isn't really much time for fun when every day is a struggle to stay alive.
Bleexal: Alright what about the zombies?
Jay (cautiously): What about the zombies?
Bleexal: What's your relationship with them?
Jay: Well they try to eat me and i blow their heads off?
Bleexal(skeptical voice): That's all?
Jay (confused): Yeah why...
Bleexal: Well it's just...
Jay: Wait are you implying that i-
Bleexal: Well that's our show folks see you tomorrow.
Jay: No wait this isn't over what were you-
- transmission ended*
Show 2
Bleexal: Welcome back everyone Michael isn't here today on account of he was feeling "well" (whispered: get the joke or die) so we have a stand in today i would like to present Mr.Eatyourbrains with the zombie report.
Mr.eatyourbrains: Mrh?
Bleexal: um okay (Jay where'd you find this guy?)
Jay: (Me? I thought you hired him)
Bleexal: ok wait just a second.
Mr.eatyourbrains: Mrh?
- headshot*
Bleexal: problem solved. Now for the survivor report.
Jay: well a recent poll shows that the most edible human is BarricadeBot:14930484 which has been eaten a total of 172 times in less than 4 days good job taking one for the team BarricadeBot:14930484.
Bleexal: yes hat's off to BarricadeBot:1337... Or whatever it was... Anyways in more important and incredibly less boring news than jay's-
Jay: HEY!!
Bleexal: -another recent poll shows that apparently being shot hurts here with us to talk more about this momentous discovery is tonights guest Bill head of the now non existant MRA (Malton Rifle Association.) Hello Bill welcome to the show.
Bill: Thanks Bleexal glad to be here.
Bleexal: so in your professional opinion is this momentous discovery accurate no pun intended?
Bill: well as head of the former MRA and a long time PKer I can safely say that bullets do in fact hurt.
Bleexal: can you give us an example?
Bill: of course thought you'd never ask!
- gunshot*
- sounds of fighting and gunshots*
5 minutes later
Jay: well as bleexal just had his head blown off I guess the show is over for today um see ya tomorrow or as soon as bleexal gets revived goodnight.\
- transmission ended*
(disclaimer: this page should be considered a parody of radio talk shows and will be heavy with U.D. and zombie related jokes if you lack a sense of humor go away any editing done without a given reason in the talk page will be considered rude and i will take immediate action EG. crying or much more likely the severing of one or more of your limbs)