View source for Ghetto Cow

{{HistoricalGroup}}

{{Groupbox|
group_name=Ghetto Cow|
group_image=[[Image:zcow.jpg|The cow is watching...]]‎|
group_abbrev=GC|
group_membership=40...a fething lot o' people!|
group_leaders=[[User:Lachryma|Lachryma]]||
group_goals=Have fun, get some rats, wander around.|
group_recruit=Whoever's in our building/suburb/city/planet is welcome to join.  We prefer new players, cuz they're cooler.|
group_contact=Say something on our talk page.  Or not.}}
A group of survivors who realize that '''unorganized resistance is no resistance at all'''.  They ended their reign of glory in the [[Stickling Mall]] area, fighting [[LUE]] and looking for rats in the pet shop. They were a rather motley group, yet they were proud of their zombie hunting/survivor healing ways.  They also had a thing about [[wikipedia:Scotch whisky|scotch]] and [[wikipedia:Rat|rats]], though not necessarily together.

{{TOCleft}}

==No More Rats==
'''<font color=red>With Lachryma finally catching a flight out of Malton, this group o' organized survivors is finally wandering off/apart.  But they ended everything on a decent note, cuz being eaten by [[LUE]] is about as great as one can get.  And motivating some Shearbank sheep to wake up and do something is pretty amazing too.  After around 10 months of walking around Malton looking for big sieges and even bigger stashes of scotch, it's all over.  Some would say that's sad.  Feth, we think that's sad.  But it's about time.  So, GC members, move on with your lives already!</font>'''


== You need a needle, kid? ==
Revive requests for you and your rat are '''[[Ghetto Cow/Revival Clinic|welcome here]]'''!


==Modern Technology==
Ha!  We got on the [[NMC]]'s ultra-classy [http://c4nt.proboards104.com/index.cgi forum!]  Can't touch this!

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==War On Sheep==
[[Image:Bsfa98.JPG|thumb|right|A Ghetto Cow member kicks off the War on Sheep]]
Look, sheep are filthy, lazy, dumb herd animals that often resemble filthy, lazy, dumb herd survivors who end up killing the rest of us by their moronic actions.  In light of that, we here at Ghetto Cow declare a War on Sheep, similar to the USA's War on Drugs (but we are gonna win this one).  Survivors will stop acting like boring sheep and start being organized!  Or so we hope.

We'll have further updates in the near future!

'''Update: Check out the [[Necrotech Security Zones]] page!  It's an excellent idea for real survivors to use!'''

'''Update: It has come to our attention that [[Dulston]] is sheep-central.  Combat-reviving is rampant, people are acting dumb, and [[User:Zombie slay3r/Sir Isaac Newton|one zombie]] (after being stuck with a needle) is quoted as saying, "I look forward to having rack of lamb for dinner in Dulston".  That's just sad.  They need some zombie hordes tearing up their precious sheep-y suburb to teach them how to live!'''

'''Template!'''
{{Waronsheep}}

Made by the expert template crafter known as [[User:Zombie slay3r|Zombie Slay3r]], this template is lovely!  

If you wanna use it, put '''<nowiki>{{Waronsheep}}</nowiki>''' on your page!

'''And look, we got posters too!  Made by [[User:Specialist290|Specialist290]] no less!'''

[[Image:Sheepposter.JPG|250px|left]][[Image:Knowledgepowerit2.jpg|250px|right]]


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==Tactics==
This be how we roll, fool.  Duh.
=== Large Siege Tactics ===
So you're hanging out in...some building under siege, ignoring the hundreds of zombies outside, and suddenly you hear a banging on your barricades!  Before you react, several zombies smash past the 'cades and into your refuge!  What do you do?

*A. Shoot the pusbags in the face!
*B. Run like hell to another building!
*C. Casually walk past the zombies and out the door!

Well, all of those options are wrong.  If you're awake and the dead break in, you must, before anything else, '''barricade'''!  A couple of zombies is no big deal, but the huge horde outside is, and by blocking them, you save yourself AND all the survivors in the building.  Once the 'cades are back up, then you'll want to heal any critically injured people (including yourself), THEN you can start shooting.  After you kill one zombie, ''immediately'' dump the body or it might get back up.  Then kill the rest of the slimy dead fools.

'''Summary: During a large siege, deal with zombie break-ins like so: BARRICADE, HEAL, KILL, DUMP BODY, rinse, and repeat.''' 

This will save lives in any large siege!

=== River Tactics ===
Members feeling like having fun hang out in the hot spots of [[Malton]] (right now that would be the [[Ridleybank]] area).

{{SRiverTactics}}

Also, the idea of River Tactics, or melting around a zombie horde, is supported by us.  Why hold territory if the zombies just want your flesh?

This also applied to the [[Blackmore Building]], so since it got fethed there, we hit the road to piss off the zombies.  No brains here, what now, zed?  What now?!


== Look what we got! ==

[[Image:GC-shield-sm.png|left]]

{| style="float: right"
|style="background: white"|{{GCmanifesto}}
|}

<center>

=== Our Coat of Arms ===

A lovely, dedicated member of ours (a certain [[User:Ev933n|robot artist]]) made us a shield/coat of arms thingy!  Aren't you impressed?

We can use this coat of arms at our semi-annual jousting tournament!

=== Manifesto ===

'nuff said.

</center>

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<center>
=== Templates ===
</center>

{| style="float: left"
|style="background: white"|One of our talented [[User:Zombie slay3r|members]] made us a '''template'''!
<br>
{{GC}}
<br>
If you want this work of art, just slap <nowiki>{{GC}}</nowiki> on your page!
|}

{| style="float: right"
|style="background: white"|[[User:Ev933n|One]] of our not-so-talented-as-[[User:Zombie slay3r|some]] made us ''another''.
<br>
{{GC2}}
<br>
'''Usage:''' To use, type <nowiki>{{GC2}}</nowiki>.
|}

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----
<center>''In order to see all of Ghetto Cow's templates, [http://wiki.urbandead.com/index.php/Category:Ghetto_Cow_Templates click here]</center>
----


== Why we play Urban Dead ==
*'''[[User: Lachryma| Lachryma]]''''s story, edited to remove her accent:  

:Today (12/28), a few hours before I hit max AP, I logged in. To my horror, 15 zeds had broken in to Latrobe and were wiping the place with blood. I promptly ran to Caiger...Then I realized I could stop a few deaths, so I ran back to Latrobe and started healing people. After getting about 5 survivors back on their feet, the zeds noticed me. 

:After seeing that I was being eviscerated, I fled to Caiger to regroup. I had '''1 HP'''! After healing myself up to 51 HP and grabbing some medkits, I went back to Latrobe. Now there was 19 zombies and even more hurt people. I could only heal a couple before getting attacked again (being active moves you to the bottom of the list of people). This time I was infected too. After repeating my patented move of running to the mall and healing, I returned to heal one last guy before limping to the mall with 20 HP. Whew, that was fun!

*'''[[User:Dag00| Dag00]]''''s reason:

:'''Zombies'''.  They're cool.

*'''[[User:Zombie slay3r|Zombie slay3r]]''''s reason to play:

:I play because it is fun and the community is awesome!  And if you don't play you'll be nuked from orbit!  Twice!!

*'''[[User:Skitchipoo|Skitchipoo]]''''s reason:

:Two words: Bruce Campbell.... One more word: Boomstick.

*'''[[User:Ev933n|Ev933n]]''''s reason:

:I gotta agree with everyone else here. Awesome community. Zombies. Adrenaline rush. Boomstick. I mean, where else do you get to battle undead hordes and then potentially join them?

*'''[[User:Cap'n Silly|Cap'n Silly]]''''s reason, edited to make sense:

:I have too much free time.

*'''[[User:Specialist290|Specialist290]]''''s reasons:

:Introduced to the game by a few friends who played, and despite a short break I've been addicted ever since. I also like shooting things.

*'''[[User:Tanith|Jamm26er]]''''s reason:

:HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!   ''Note: The rest of GC is vaguely disturbed by that laugh...''

*'''[[User:Mazu|Mazu]]''''s reason:

:when i cant be outside wasting my time i need somthing to do but art and crafts arent my thing. So here i am wasting my time with people that i dont ever know in real life can you think of a better way to spent a bad day :)

*'''[[User:Che13|Che13]]''''s reason:

:well, you can be a terrified survivor one day, and a freaking Zombie the next, enjoying both the adrenaline of the prey, and the satisfaction of the hunter

*'''[[User:Bubacxo|Bubacxo]]''''s reason:

:I work nights at the local electric company, and I use whatever distractions necessary to keep awake/aware when it's 2am or so & there are no calls, no web orders left... you get the idea. besides, I think this game is a slice of fried gold, as they say.

*'''[[User:Suicidalangel|Suicidalangel]]''''s reason:

:I do a lot of writing (non-published, so no, you won't find anything of mine in a store. Maybe someday though...) and UD helps me sort through the ideas I already have, gives me ideas for the next part in a book, or helps me cool down after a pretty strenuous spree of writing. That and it's fun as hell. I mean if you don't like killing a Zmob!e/Harman, then there is something really, really wrong with you.

*'''[[User:Broken dreams|Broken dreams]]''''s reason:

:Cause... I get to shoot dead things?

*'''[[User:Tosca| Tosca]]''''s reason:

:Well. It beats working at McDonald's.

*'''[[User:Dalzyio Redavilla| Dalzyio Redavilla]]''''s reason:

:The NecroTech cafeteria serves baked ziti. Oh, and those syringes are reeeallly shiiiny.

*'''[[User:Someguy5031| Someguy5031]]''''s reason:

:Because waiting 24 hours to be fully rested gives me enough free time to play other not as good zombie games.

== Leadership ==
[[Image:Agitplakat.jpg|left|thumb|300px|Lachryma (left) and Dag00 at the [[Blackmore Building]].]]
[[User:Dag00| Dag00]] and [[User: Lachryma| Lachryma]] lead Ghetto Cow with strength of personality and bribes of scotch.  They also try to lead from the front, such as when they were the first members of Ghetto Cow in Ridleybank. Sometimes, however, they get a bit delayed, such as that incident at the Laimbeer Building---death can do that, you know! But they did make it eventually! 

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==Wishlist==
[[Image:407px-Ussr0486.jpg|right|thumb|260px|A member of Ghetto Cow drinks scotch out of his helmet]]
#We wish we had killed more zombies in [[Ridleybank]].  Oh well.
#We wish we were on the [http://urbandead.com/stats.html stats page]!  Hey, '''we got our wish'''!  Scotch for everyone!
#We wish we had some rats.  They could carry ammo!
#We wish we could put spiky things in barricades, because...um...that would look cool!
#We wish the zombies would stop swaying around and do something with their lives!  Like build a mall or take up painting!  They are a burden on society and we are tired of supporting them with Welfare Brains and bullets for their diet!
#We wish the [[Mall Tour '07]] would just give up and go home.  It's our JC Penney's, dammit, and they can't have it!
#We wish we had ''25'' members!  Can you even imagine the awesomeness of that?!  Hey, '''we got our wish'''! Rats for everyone!
#We wish we had more rats, as we're low on 'em after the Mall Tour ate a bunch of the poor little guys...
#We wish some of our inactive members would wake up and do something.  Like...um...show up to one of our operations!  That's not too much to ask, right?
#We wish we had 40 members!  Think it can happen?
#We wish we had more wishes, but we aren't greedy...sorta...

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== Members ==
Okay, this section is awe inspiring!  Yeah, you heard right: 'Awe inspiring'!
#[[User: Lachryma| Lachryma]] - The Czarina. Is in charge of healing, saying hi to other groups, and recruiting 
#[[User:Ethelred IV|Ethelred IV]] - A fanatic who trekked halfway across [[Malton]] to find us.
#[[User:Skitchipoo|Skitchipoo]] - Retired fireman looking for work as male dancer/stripper. Still have jacket, boots, hat, and axe. Will wear all or none. Contact immediately.
#[[User:Ev933n|Ev933n]] - A self-described 'Civilian Drunkard Holy Man'...who likes rats.  We find the best people, don't we?
#[[User:Cap'n Silly|Cap'n Silly]] - An insane person who once ate a squid...and washed it down with some scotch!
#[[User:Cow0160girl|Cow0160girl]] - She was dumb enough to join up with the military, but smart enough to be assigned to medic training.  She notices you looking, points at her medic cross, and blows you a kiss.  She loves Ghetto Cow almost as much as she loves her rat.
#Mr Franklin (aka [[User:Angryjohnny|AngryJohnny]]) - A high-baller in the business world. If you cross his stock exchange, '''watch out'''! (Secretly desires to be the next super hero.)
#[[User:Nibiletz|Nibiletz]] - A German-loving, scotch-less (that's why he joined us!) person who stopped being a [[DHPD|cop]] and started being cool! (''Note: Apparently he likes this desciption.'')
#[[User:Lonewolf17a|Lonewolf17a]] - Likes to be called Wolf. High clearance military enlistee, and viciously pro-human.
#[[User:Mazu|Mazu]] - Well, as far as we can tell he's the decent type, with a penchant for going outside...which is dangerous...  (Mazu says: ''Yeah I'll go with that sounds good enough'')
#[[User:Bubacxo|Bubacxo]] - Nocturnal American Weirdo. Has been on FAK duty for too long, and joined the Cows for some good humor & action... Whichever comes first.
#[[User:Andre Aloisius|Andre Aloisius]] - Dedicated to making all things a little funkier. Except zombies. They're pretty funky already.
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=789694 Richard Leaper] (aka [[User:Aguyuno|Aguyuno]]) - A NT employee who keeps on getting lost due to Lachryma's brilliant incomprehensible plan.
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=420828 ASGs] (aka [[User:Hlfranklin|Hlfranklin]]) - Yet another brilliant military mind. This guy comes prepared!
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=749493 JAK Gladney] (aka [[User:Murray Jay Suskind|Murray Jay Suskind]]) - A former Barhah-addict who was converted with creative use of rats and a kiwi.
#[[User:Lizii|Lizii]] - A young newbish survivor trying to fight her way through Malton
#[[User:Vista|Vista]] - Former bureaucrat and thus [[WCDZ|Evil]] personified. Devilishly handsome, his coffee is to kill for. Vista is highly recommended by 9 out of 10 doctors. Ask yours if he is right for you.
#[[User:ClydeFrog|ClydeFrog]] - Terrified survivor, highly skilled at getting stuck outside heavily barricaded buildings with little to no AP.  Also known as "C-Frog", his rapper name.
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=595155 Dr'Lector] (aka [[User:Moctezuma|Moctezuma]]) - An Aztec warrior that wandered into Malton to find Cortez and kill him over and over again.  Theme song is [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hQgCJGNspI People of the Sun]
#[http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=674812 Dertodesengel32] (aka [[User:Suicidalangel|Suicidalangel]]) - An angel who is so depressed that he/she/it has descended amongst us mortals to cry.  Oh, and to kill zombies.
#[http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=624927 assasin9854] - This poor, poor man is utterly trapped in the 50's.  Commie Lachryma scares him, zombies seem natural to him (conformity...yeah), and he longs for a car with fins.
#[http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=896412 Broken Dreams] (aka...[[User:Broken dreams|Broken dreams]]) - A vaguely disturbed guy who wears a gas mask <s>for no bloody reason.</s>cause he can.  Good thing he likes rats.
#[[User:Bunkhumper|Bunkhumper]] - A porn camera man, or so he claims.  All we know is that he often seems to be lining up angles and such on Skitch and occasionally Lachryma when she has a whip.
#[[User:Two Kings|Two Kings]] - He always appears to be tipsy and constantly bragging about how good he is at pool.  One would think pool is a bad game to play in Malton, but we're not experts.
#[[User:Tosca|Tosca]] - She's an observer. You know, just kinda kicking back and watching the rest of us kill stuff.  But if she's told to do something, she seems a touch maniacal.  Or something.
#[[User:Dalzyio Redavilla|Dalzyio Redavilla]] - Insane?  Check.  Likes plant food?  Check.  Cool guy?  Damn straight.
#[[User:Someguy5031| Someguy5031]] - Medic that thinks saving lives comes second to shooting zombies in the face.
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=927289 Artouis Francis] - A young Frenchman with a history of violence and murder.  Or are we saying that just to mess with you?
#[[User:Fight for life|Fight for life]] - A nice enough bloke who keeps going on about 'fighting for his life', as if he needed to in Malton...
#[[User:rainmaekr|rainmaekr]] - One crazy S.O.B. that would build barricades with explosives if we let him.  He also likes long walks in [[Ridleybank]] and cold, hard cash.
#[[User:Quagmister|Firequag]] - A very quiet fireman who finally couldn't take it anymore and demanded to be put on this list.
#:::: {{c|red|'''''The Crimson Wolves'''''}} ([[Ghetto Cow/Crimson Wolves|link]])
#:
#[[User:Specialist290|Specialist290]] - "Zombism ''is'' a disease, but a curable one. Take two Headshots and see me in the morning if you still have any problems."
#[[User:Che13|Che13]] - An Argentinian who says 'che' all the fething time...or something like that.  His English is perfect though.
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=462726 IceJedi5] (aka [[User:1337p5yc0|1337p5yc0]]) - A military scout left behind because he accidentally thought the word "zombie" was Greek for "party". So far he has not seen any parties, just a bunch of dead people.  He joined us cuz of "The Beatles, Rock and Specialist290 said so."
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=368542 Private Someone] (aka [[User:The Omega|The Omega]]) - Some insane person we found in a dark ally.  He's dressed very classy though, and the rats seemed to like him, so we decided to keep him.
#[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=318583 Bluemofia] (aka [[User:Bluemofia|Bluemofia]]) - Describes himself as a "zombie hunter Stalin".  Little else is known of him...ooo, be afraid!
#[[User:Zombie slay3r|Zombie slay3r]] - Former leader of ZAF, and a welcome addition to Ghetto Cow!
#:
#:::: Those below are '''Missing In Action'''
#:
#[[User: Ichoglan | Icho]] - Decent success at killing zombies--when not one of them, that is...
#[[User:BuckyCatt| BuckyCatt]] - Violent chap.  Luckily, he hates zombies
#[[User:Dag00| Dag00]] - Shooting stuff that groans and...um...protecting the rest of us!
#Jamm26er (aka [[User:Tanith| Tanith]]) - Scouts around, hurls cheap insults.
#[[User:Yiddish| Yiddish]] If it groans, he shoots it.  
#::::'''Members Who Wandered Off'''
#:
#[[User:Xensyria|Xensyria]] - <strike>A low-level military enlistee with a gun who is helping fight the good fight against PKers and Zedheads.</strike>  He couldn't keep up with us, and decided to stay at [[Caiger Mall]].  We are high-speed, low-drag!
#[http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=844286 M1592D] (aka [surprise!] [[User:M1592D|M1592D]]) - <s>A steam-powered firefighter who, ironically, does not use his awesome mechanical strength except to dispense medkits.  Or something.</s> He was all like, "I'm supposed to love rats?  Ewww!" so we left him on the side of road.  Bye!
#Dux Alleius (aka [[User: Dux Ducis|Dux Ducis]]) - <s>A poor, underfed rabbit hunter who somehow is employed by NecroTech...don't ask.</s>  He kept crying and moaning about some Zone he was supposed to be protecting, so we loaded him up with scotch and sent him on his merry way.  After taking all his kiwis, of course.

<br>

<center>And that's it.  We need more people!!</center>

<center>[[Talk:Ghetto Cow/Disclaimer|... our disclaimer ...]]</center>


==Oooh! An even newer Travel Journal!==
Sit down and have a beer! Regale us with your tales of [[Ridleybank]]! And order some mozzarella sticks!

===June 19th, 2007===
*[An excerpt from the book '''''Finally, Somebody Who Loves Me For My Brains: The Story of a Disillusioned Stripper'''''] I wake up to find my new medical droid, BJ4U, screeching about a distress call from [[User:Lachryma|Lach]] about going to [[Moggridge_Place_Police_Department|Moggridge PD]]. That trashcan-looking droid gets annoying sometimes but damn can it FAK people up! As I was leaving, several zeds tore the barricades down and started to come in. I found as many inflated balloons as I could and rebarricaded the doors until I blacked out. Darkness. I dreamed about the past... a time when people actually wrote in this Travel Journal. And then I dreamt about ninjas... --[[User:Skitchipoo|Skitchipoo]] 09:12, 19 June 2007 (BST)
*[Lachryma is looking through a collection of sunglasses in [[Moggridge_Place_Police_Department|Moggridge Place PD]]] ''Look at horrible zombie scratch on shades!  Is so annoying!  Anyway, I leave safety of Blackmore place to come to less safe PD.  See room there?'' [She points at a donut-break room]  ''That is where famous [[RRF]] is born.  Or at least that is what tour book says.'' [She holds up a ratty collection of RRF propaganda]  ''And so now I keep zombies out and wish for medkits!  Is good life in this PD!''
*[ A passage taken from a book that was stolen by a stalker that was stolen by a hooker that was stolen by a priest that was stolen by [[User:God|God]] that was stolen from the original writer] I followed the Good Czarina'a call for help to go to [[Moggridge_Place_Police_Department|Moggridge Place PD]] only to find that the place is infested. After making a bet with Che and Spec, and winning the bet, I was killed. I then stood up and shambled to the RP, only to find someone caded the church. After waiting a few hours I was revived, and yet again mauled by Zombies. Only this time it was in the "Safety" of the Blackmoar Building. After again getting a revive at the church, which was again caded, I decided to go to Adelberts hospital to get some FAKs, so I could start to seriously FAK around. As soon as I get there, I was PK'ed. I wonder how many more times I can die in one day?


== The Lovely Past Events of Ghetto Cow ==
We slapped that old stuff on another page, since it's, well, old, but if you really, really want to read of our valiant, scotch-soaked, rat-eating exploits in Ridleybank, click '''[[Ghetto Cow/Ridleybank|here]]'''!

And if you care about what we did in the Caiger area (we were there twice!), click '''[[Ghetto Cow/Caiger|here]]'''!

Also, we did cool stuff in [[Shearbank]], which is talked about '''[[Ghetto_Cow/Shearbank|here]]'''!

Moving along, we had fun in [[Yagoton]], and we even remembered enough of it to talk about it '''[[Ghetto Cow/Yagoton|here]]'''!

Still want to hear more? Check out our '''[[Ghetto_Cow/Molebank|activities]]''' in [[Molebank]]!


== Allies ==
*Due to randomly finding them on the wiki, we now love '''[[AlQilya]]''', a very lovely group based in [[Gulsonside]], a suburb said to have palm trees and pristine beaches.  And we can confirm that, as we've been to Gulsonside!
**An [[AlQilya]] member, [[User:Jon D'oh|Jon D&#39;oh]], has an awesome diary on his page.  You should check it out!
[[Image:Teamworkaf3.jpg|right|250px]]
*Again, we randomly found a cool group on the wiki, and so we are now allied with the '''[[Knights of the Rose]]''', a group based in the far away suburb of [[Dulston]].

*A group by the name of '''[[Ragnarok]]''' ''randomly found us'' on the wiki, and we think they are decent types, even if they shoot zombies with paintballs.  No, they're cool and we like them.

*We must be slacking in randomly browsing the wiki, as ''another'' group found us!  Anyway, the '''[[Malton Girl Scouts]]''' are slightly insane yet happy people who are hanging out in Caiger Mall.  And they have cookies!  Therefore they are allies due to our brilliant logic.

*Yep, we must be getting lazy, for the third group in a row has randomly found us on the wiki.  Wow!  Anyway, the '''[[Knights Templar]]''' are a worthy ally, and they got armour.  That's pretty impressive!

*'''[[Sons of Liberty|The Sons of Liberty]]''' first came to our attention when they got in a wiki-fight with the Knights Templar.  After [[User: Lachryma| Lachryma]] settled the dispute, they convinced us to be allies, as they seem like honorable types.

*'''[[Die Angriff-Maschine]]''', a group we randomly found on the wiki, are a new and fresh gang on the scene, and their small size is made up with their peerless coordination!  We wish them the best of luck!

*'''[[M(A)F]]''' - These guys (yes, we found them rather randomly) are a good bunch, even if they do have problems with authority and all that...anyway, they are cool!

*'''[[Ridleybank ZKers]]''' are a group that shambles about, gnawing on their fellow zombies.  That's awesome in itself, yet they also attract rats with their rotting flesh!  Isn't that great?!

*'''[[Aardwolf Rangers]]''' are a valiant group of warriors who use their flaming weaponry to fend off the zombie hordes.  Well, that's what they told us, anyway...

*'''[[Grayside Demons]]''' - A group that may be more insane than us.  Maybe.  Anyway, they seem nice enough, and we did meet their leader randomly, so that's a good sign!  Also, we've caught them saying 'feth', another good sign!

*'''[[Umbrella Corporation]]''' - Some like-minded survivors (in that they help people and some of them wander around) who seem aight to us.  And we met them randomly on a forum!  Yessss!


== Our Filthy Enemies ==
[[Image:Z-GC.jpg|right|thumb|170px|If it groans, shoot it]]
===PKers===
Well, we have issues with a few random [[PK]]ers, hence this section.
*This dirty son of a squid,[http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=155270 Tyr 316,] killed [[User:Cap'n Silly|Cap'n Silly]] for no reason. 
*In addition, [[User:Sgt Milton|Sgt Milton]] killed [[User:Zombie slay3r|Zombie slay3r]], and this Milton guy was alive! Freaking PKers. Anyway, if you happen to see Sgt Milton, put some lead into him, for Zombie Slay3r's sake. Or give him some zombie blood mixed with scotch. Your choice.
:[http://img297.imageshack.us/my.php?image=sgtmiltonrevengemj9.jpg REVENGE!!!]  --[[Image:ZombieSlay3rSig.png]]<sup>[[User talk:Zombie slay3r|T]]</sup> 01:26, 10 April 2007 (BST)
*[[User:Ozzel|Ozzel89 and his alts]] are self-proclaimed PKers. He killed [[User:Skitchipoo|Skitchipoo]] and has killed countless others. Watch out! He seems like a nice guy though...
*[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=642461 Suburban Ed] PKed Ev933n for being naked. I shit you not. Is the C4NT a group of PKers?

===Brain Rotters===
Members: If you see any [[brain rot|brain rotted]] zombies at your local revive point, add 'em to this list and then get them out of our hair by way of shooting them.

*[http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=120694 zommo] - A known brainless zombie in the Caiger Area.
*[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=315194 Jano] - Just one I stumbled onto. This one really is rotted. And hanging out in our STACK!
*[http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=17587 Tour] - hanging out outside the church.
*don't revivify [http://www.urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=63408 maxime].. he actually *is* following us.

===Zombies===
*Some would say we hate zombies, but we're cool with them.  We just to like make sure there's plenty of lead in their diet.  A bullet a day keeps the...uh, maggots away!


== Why a cow? ==
Why a [[trenchcoat]]?  Seriously, our name comes from an old joke from the group of friends that founded this group.  So there.
=== Something random ===
We found '''[[Coat of Arms|this]]''' on the wiki, and we find it rather funny.  Do you?


==Ghetto Cow Mailing List ==
[http://games.groups.yahoo.com/group/ghetto_cow http://games.groups.yahoo.com/group/ghetto_cow]
This lovely thing (once you join) facilitates communication en-masse in the group. It seems passive enough to not be annoying like Jehovah's Witnesses, but active enough to facilitate "important" messages getting to group members.  We are so subtle, aren't we?


== Funniest Moments in Ghetto Cow's History ==
*The time [[User:Dag00| Dag00]] attacked zombies so hard he passed out, and lay in the street before getting the strength to crawl to safety after a few hours.  True story!
*The time [[User: Lachryma| Lachryma]] thought closing doors would stop Zombie 2.0: Guaranteed To Open All Doors! 
*When [[User:Tanith| Jamm26er]] decided to take on a zombie horde with a flare gun and his fists.  It almost worked!
*The time [[User:BuckyCatt| BuckyCatt]] demanded to be Ghetto Cow's leader, after being in the game and the group for 5 minutes.
*The time [[User:Tanith| Jamm26er]] told us he would "go find the zombies", since he was a Scout...
*The time [[User: Lachryma| Lachryma]] randomly picked the Laimbeer Building as a rendezvous point for the group, and then it turned out to be full of zombies in a completely infested area.   
*When [[User:BuckyCatt| BuckyCatt]] and [[User:Ichoglan|Ichoglan]] claimed they needed the [[Shopping]] skill before they could come down to [[Ridleybank]], a notoriously bad place to shop.  The GC members present in [[Ridleybank]] were unimpressed. 
*The time the '''entire flaming group''' agreed to ditch [[Caiger Mall]] and come down to [[Gulsonside]]...then only 3 of us left, and the rest helped reclaim Caiger.  Lucky fools.
*When [[User:Zombie slay3r|Zombie slay3r]] ranted about how zombies always attacked him first, almost like they knew his name and didn't like it...
*The time [[User:Ev933n|Ev933n]] killed a zombie in Latrobe.  We thought he'd never leave the open bar, but apparently the hapless zed broke his scotch bottle.  It got, understandably, ugly real fast.  We are now considering moving the open bar outside, just to see if Ev933n will kill all the zombies.
*Once, Penelope, one of [[User:Cap'n_Silly|the Cap]]'s pet squids, ate half of his cheese hoard. He cried for weeks! ''The validity of this story is currently under heavy investigation by PETA.''
*The day [[User:Specialist290|Specialist290]] discovered that he [[Great_Radio_Messages#The_Sincerest_Form_of_Flattery|was not alone]]. He was later able to identify the [[User:GrownUpSurvivor|person responsible]], who was quite flattered at the attention. ''Explanation: Specialist290 changes Beatles lyrics into Urban Deadified songs.''
*The time [[User:Cap'n_Silly|Cap'n Silly]] tried to help our new member, [[User:Che13|Che]], by reviving him...then he got eaten by a random zombie.  [[User:Lachryma|Lachryma]] decided to come to the rescue, but a giant neon message in the sky read 'You have hit your IP limit.  Come back tomorrow...'  Luckily, 'tomorrow' was in British time, so 10 minutes later Lachryma tracked down Che and gave him some Soviet medicine!  And then she revived Cap'n Silly too!
*The time [[User:Specialist290|Specialist290]] invented the art of feng shui barricading; because you know that in a zombie apocalypse you'll want the most artistic barricades protecting you.
*The time [[User:Nibiletz|Nibiletz]] said: "The Survivors <nowiki>[</nowiki>at [[Caiger Mall|Caiger]]<nowiki>]</nowiki> are pissing me off with their nonchalant attitude, can I give them cat urine and tell 'em it's booze?", summing up the mood of many GC members.
*The time [[User:Ev933n|Ev933n]] lost his trusty plastic compass and got lost on the way to [[Stickling Mall]], despite the big feth signs everywhere.  In his own words: "''OMFG! NEWBZORZ!''"
*Apparently our newest member, [[User:Mazu|Mazu]], feels that we don't need his help at Whippey...so he sent his zombie alt to kill us and his survivor alt wandered off!  Our own members are trying to eat us!
*The time we tried to open up a tanning salon in [[Ridleybank|the 'bank]] and 30 zombie showed up out of nowhere, which was far too many for our 2 tanning beds.
*The time that [[User:Specialist290|Specialist290]] discovered that the "Random Beatle Fan" at Nichols Mall was also the same guy who had Headshot him at a revive point earlier that day. However, Spec was willing to talk it out, and after finding out it was due to a misunderstanding, instead of killing and dumping him he decided to forgive him "in the spirit of John Lennon."
:*And now [[User:Specialist290|Spec]] has managed to recruit the guy! :) He should be on to add his name to the list shortly.
*The time [[User:Lachryma|Lachryma]] claimed she got [[User:Murray Jay Suskind|Murray Jay Suskind]]'s alt to join GC because of her "alluring kiwis"...and it took a while for her to realize how wrong that sounded...
*The time [[User:Cap'n Silly|Cap'n Silly]] violated the laws of nature by piling his pack rats with so much junk that there was no way they could move...but they did!
*The time [[User:Vista|Vista]] was so overcome with his own evilness that he did an impressive Scottish charge (complete with "FREEEEEEEEEEDOM!") an entire day before the rest of group could ''even'' think of charging.  So yeah, it looked cool, but it didn't do anything.  Good luck next time!
*The time [http://urbandead.com/profile.cgi?id=840714 this slimy RRF bastard] killed [[User:Lachryma|Lachryma]] in cold blood with a pistol...and then she stood up and ate him.  Ha, a survivor-zombie got back at a zombie-survivor!
*The time [[User:Suicidalangel|Suicidalangel]] claimed that "If a chihuahua comes near me, I'm killing it. Period."  Obviously he had a run in with a zombie chihuahua in his childhood...or something...
*The time [[User:Lachryma|Lachryma]] tried to take on 20-something zombies with 6 bullets, [[User:1337p5yc0|Icejedi5]], and [[User:Suicidalangel|Suicidalangel]].  It almost worked.  [http://iwrecords.urbandead.info/08-01-07_2100hrs_PUBLIC/IN_45-16_Wantmore_2_fd7-1b9-e58.html Proof].


== Random Propaganda ==
We had lots of posters, but this next one was better then all of them...

===[[Channel 4 News Team]]===
So classy:

[[Image:GLORIOUSBATTLE.jpg|300px]]


== Graffiti...so very useful! ==
If you want to advertise our beautiful, fun-filled group in Urban Dead, grab a spray can and slap up:
*"[http://tinyurl.com/22l9pl tinyurl.com/22l9pl]-Ghetto Cow has scotch!"  ''Note: The tinyurl thing links to this page.  Thanks, [[User:Ev933n|Ev933n]]!''
*"Ghetto Cow rules!  Check the wiki."
*"We got an open bar!-Ghetto Cow"
*"Ghetto Cow - rocking Latrobe since 2006!"
*"Tripping on 'shrooms?  Join Ghetto Cow!"
*"Do you wish you were a rat? Join Ghetto Cow!"
*"Want a belly dance?  Join Ghetto Cow!"
*Or make up something witty that's under 50 characters and mentions us in a good way!


== Why should I join Ghetto Cow? ==

[[Image:Want_poster.jpg|right|thumb|200px|By order of the supreme Czarina.]]

[[Image:Onecopypc5.jpg|left|200px]]

We work together.  You'll always know you have a place to fall back to, some medkits waiting for you, and some armed-to-the-teeth-people to help you deal with big clumps of zombies.


If you play UD, you're part of a big community.  If you read this wiki, you're part of a slightly smaller community.  And if join Ghetto Cow, you're part of an even smaller community!  See, it's logical.


Group effort is so much more effective.  One person can't do everything.  It took a group to make the nuclear bomb, a group started the civil rights movement, and a group made the zombie virus (as far as we know).


We have '''rats''' ''AND'' '''scotch'''!  No one can beat that!

<br clear="all" />

== Showing our support! ==


{{Caiger}}


{| cellpadding=0 style="background-color:white; border:solid black 5px; margin: 0 2em 0 2em" width=275
|-
| rowspan=2 | [[Image:Blackmore Bastard Brigade.JPG|100px]] || style="background:black; color:red; font-size: 120%" align="center" | '''Blackmore Bastard'''
|-
| align="center"  style="font-size: 90%; color:black" | The RRF has had to lay siege to its own NecroTech and this group sent the [[Blackmore Bastard Brigade|Bastards]] inside some reinforcements.
''11/5/06 - 11/22/06 ''
|}


{{5th of NovemberSmall}} 

{{AlQilya Template}}


{{PenelopeSearch}}


{{SacredGroundPolicy}}


{{Colossus}}



[[Category:Survivor Groups]]
[[Category:Ghetto Cow]]