User:Chief Seagull/Haggaz: Difference between revisions
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[[Image:Haggis.jpg|thumb|right|Haggaz is best served with a garnish of brains (rot optional). It tastes even better if you can stop the local psycho from sticking a hunting knife into it.]] | |||
This Marzan take on the famous Scottish tradition is tasty, nourishing and easy to prepare. | This Marzan take on the famous Scottish tradition is tasty, nourishing and easy to prepare. | ||
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#Open the fresh human and <s>carefully</s> remove the stomach. Empty the contents and clean it thoroughly. | #Open the fresh human and <s>carefully</s> remove the stomach. Empty the contents and clean it thoroughly. | ||
#<s>Carefully</s> remove the heart, lungs and liver and <s>carefully</s> mince together (using your claws if a professional mincing machine is unavailable). | #<s>Carefully</s> remove the heart, lungs and liver and <s>carefully</s> mince together (using your claws if a professional mincing machine is unavailable). | ||
#Chop up the onions and brains and mix together. If you are unable to find any onions, use some dead flower bulbs from the nearest park. | #Chop up the onions and half of the brains and mix together. If you are unable to find any onions, use some dead flower bulbs from the nearest park. | ||
#Mix the heart, lungs, liver, brain and onions together with the stock. If you are unable to find any stock, just use blood. | #Mix the heart, lungs, liver, brain and onions together with the stock. If you are unable to find any stock, just use blood. | ||
#Season the mixture with salt and pepper. If you are unable to find any salt or pepper, | #Season the mixture with salt and pepper. If you are unable to find any salt or pepper, some ground-up rubble from a ruined building will do the trick. | ||
#Fill the stomach with the mixture. Press out any remaining air and close the stomach up. | #Fill the stomach with the mixture. Press out any remaining air and close the stomach up. | ||
#Now comes the tricky part - cooking the damn thing. If you've been fortunate enough to break into a powered hotel or mansion, you | #Now comes the tricky part - cooking the damn thing. If you've been fortunate enough to break into a powered hotel or mansion, you might be able to use an electric cooker to boil the stomach and filling for three hours. If you don't have access to an oven but you ''do'' have [[Memories of Life]], try to remember how to light a fire. | ||
#If you can't cook it, just eat it raw! | #If you can't cook it, just eat it raw! | ||
#Garnish with the remaining brains, if they haven't already been eaten. | |||
Revision as of 13:39, 28 December 2010
This Marzan take on the famous Scottish tradition is tasty, nourishing and easy to prepare.
Ingredients
- 1 Human (medium-large), from which you'll need the: -
- Stomach
- Heart
- Lungs
- Liver
- Brain
- 3 onions
- Oatmeal
- Salt and black pepper
- 150ml of stock / gravy
Directions
- Firstly, select a good quality human. It should be of a medium-to-large size, especially if you're preparing a meal for your horde or for some ferals who just happen to pass by. The many low-level newbies that are commonly found sleeping in the streets after getting barricaded out of their safehouses are ideal as these are much fresher and easier to obtain. The more experienced survivors are harder to come by, tend to have already been chewed over a few times and may have bullets and shotgun shells lodged in them, which invariably spoils their flavour.
- Open the fresh human and
carefullyremove the stomach. Empty the contents and clean it thoroughly. Carefullyremove the heart, lungs and liver andcarefullymince together (using your claws if a professional mincing machine is unavailable).- Chop up the onions and half of the brains and mix together. If you are unable to find any onions, use some dead flower bulbs from the nearest park.
- Mix the heart, lungs, liver, brain and onions together with the stock. If you are unable to find any stock, just use blood.
- Season the mixture with salt and pepper. If you are unable to find any salt or pepper, some ground-up rubble from a ruined building will do the trick.
- Fill the stomach with the mixture. Press out any remaining air and close the stomach up.
- Now comes the tricky part - cooking the damn thing. If you've been fortunate enough to break into a powered hotel or mansion, you might be able to use an electric cooker to boil the stomach and filling for three hours. If you don't have access to an oven but you do have Memories of Life, try to remember how to light a fire.
- If you can't cook it, just eat it raw!
- Garnish with the remaining brains, if they haven't already been eaten.
