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Editor Danny Lee Staff Writers -Miss Elainious -Victor Vandregas -Jay Gorman -Anne Tardew -Shrimper TFN Engineer -Private Mendoza Top News The Fortress-wide Chain kill is finished. 139 kills (New Record). Duration of 95 hours 48 minutes (New Record). 49 challengers (New Record). To sum it up, a New Record! The Battle of Barhapolis ends The value of Cheese is now 1.567 Brains An Anaconda wins 2008 Vigilance Challenge by surviving for over 200 days A Special Thanks to Our Sponsors File:Kilt.jpg New Job Openings The New Kids on The Block are looking for someone with an Age-Reverser, a machine that adjusts vocal chords for singing purposes and is also skilled in choreography. Due to their new album, they would like to not look like old people that can have shadowed dance-doubles and have to lip-sync.	Fortress News An Official Message from the Editor. Ruinator departs from TFN. I am sad to announce that Ruinator is leaving the TFN staff, to take command of Team Excalibur. Victor Vandregas will now take over as full-time writer for Team Cold Cell. Good Luck on taking up the sword, Ruinator! Team Anaconda For Ancient news of days gone by, see Anaconda Archive Operation: Fort Peril Date: May 8-June 8, 2008. Written by Miss Elainious on June 17, 2008 The Fortress received a distress call from our allies, BMC (British Military Corps) that Whtteniside and Fort Perryn were in imminent danger from an advancing combined horde of the RRF and DvEM. Further intelligence revealed that MoA and FU were also closing in on the fort. Anaconda restocked and set out from their recent mission in the NE to defend Fortress one and hopefully get some delicious BMC pies, alas before the team could get into place after its long journey, the Fort had fallen. Undaunted, Anaconda instead decided to swing in behind the path of the horde and repair the considerable damage left in the wake of its south easterly advance with plans to retake Fort Perryn as a grand finale. The team worked through the suburbs of Scarletwood and Danversbank with allies such as Garnis Border Patrol. Buildings were cleared, repaired and caded, locals were healed and revived and our progress marked by steady status changes on the map. In the interim Anaconda kept a close eye on F1, waiting for the right time to liberating from the undead masses still occupying it. We moved forward into Whitteniside and with local allies such as BMC, soon had the suburb in good order except for the jewel in the crown, Fort Perryn. With Whittenside rapidly coming back to life thanks to repair and revival efforts by Anaconda and our allies, we turned our attention to F1. Short forays into the Fort showed that although zed numbers had dropped there was still considerable resistance present. Anaconda called for reinforcements and Teams Cold Cell and Dark Watch rapidly responded, both eager to do battle and reclaim Fortress 1. The three teams gathered supplies in preparation for a long siege and planned their attack carefully with allies The Cannonball Crew (CBC), Fort Perryn Defence Force (FPDF), BMC and Creedy Defence Force(CDF). June 1 proved to be an amazing day as all the hard work and planning came together for a successful joint RT strike with The Fortress (Teams Anaconda / Cold Cell / Dark Watch) and our respected allies CC , FPDF & CDF. The end result of the initial strike was 24 zeds killed with these bodies plus several others unceremoniously dumped outside the gates of the fort. Every building was repaired within the fort, 3 essential buildings powered and barricade levels for each building, as well as the gatehouse, at barricade plan levels. Over 30 people took part in the phenomenal RT strike, coordinating via chat room, others coming in later for backup assistance, evicting zeds, healing, maintaining cades. When the gates went to EHB at midnight GMT, 33 people were in the gatehouse holding the fort while other occupied various internal buildings and over 27 zeds had been evicted. This was an unprecedented event and the level of cooperation and goodwill shown during this strike should be an example to all survivor groups in Malton. Anaconda and the other Fortress teams remained at Fort Perryn for another week, wanting to see the fort and our allies through the first VSB day following Perryn’s rebuilding and into the next. The week was a test of vigilance for all, with frequent break-ins and barricade attacks the norm. Wednesday proved to be a challenge as the horde numbers outside the gates swelled before the barricades were lowered to VSB. However this was no match for vigilant Fortress members and allies, all attempts by the zeds to reclaim Perryn were effectively repelled. When the gates were locked at EHB that night we all breathed a sigh of relief, we had withstood the first test and now even more survivors had swelled the ranks of fort defenders. Unfortunately the barricade lowering had also added griefers, breathing zeds and Pkers to the occupants within the walls of F1. Despite these minor annoyances and the occasional pathetic and uncoordinated zed attempt to infiltrate Perryn, Anaconda held strong with team-mates, friends and allies for the week, leaving as planned when the cades returned to VSB on June 8 to prepare for the 2008 mass chainkill event. Special thanks and congratulations to our friends in Cold Cell, Dark Watch and allies CBC, FPDF, BMC & CDF. A final thank you to Mad Dog Murro, an officer and a gentleman, it was a pleasure working with you. Operation: Northern Lights Operation Date: April 16 – May 6, 2008. Written by Miss Elainious on June 17, 2008 Northern Malton had been flattened by the hordes, specifically The Dead whose soul objective was to destroy all life in Malton. The northern half of Malton had become one giant red zone and The Dead had turned their hungry eyes to the south. Their southern hordes have not been as successful and they have begun to move some of their numbers south to reinforce the southern hordes. As they sent numbers south and the RRF returned to their home in Ridleybank, Anaconda bypassed them and moved northward and into the northeast to restore life and light. It was a long trip, requiring that the team stop at a couple of locations along the journey, the first stop was Roachtown. Anaconda had intended only to stay the night, but we found unexpected hospitality in the form of a very friendly survivor group, the Roach Klips. To repay their kind hospitality Anaconda stayed a few days, repairing local resource buildings, establishing a free-running lane to Stickling Mall, and recovering the mall. Unfortunately the Eastonwood Ferals began a siege in the mall just as Anaconda was preparing to move on, but repairing and lighting the mall even for a short time gave some opportunity for locals to restock on supplies and a new alliance was forged for The Fortress. Anaconda proceeded to Santlerville where the team intended only to spend the night en route to the final destination of Dulston, they had been warned to watch for a known zerger in the area by the Dribbling Beavers. All was quiet initially, but in the dead of night a suspicious character slipped into the building. The drowsing Conda’s were suspicious and those suspicions were well founded when the team found themselves under attack by the very zerger the Beavers had warned of. Seven Condas were felled by morning. Anaconda organized efficiently and all members were revived and healed in short order. We appreciated the hospitality and intelligence provided by our new friends the Dribbling Beaver and reciprocated by sharing all information they gathered during the zerg attack with the Beavers. Anaconda also thanks PrepH for facilitating this communication. A new alliance was formed with the Beavers after this episode and the team is pleased to see that Dark Watch’s PrepH has taken on the role of Ambassador with our new friends. In the final leg of our journey we reached our last destination, Dulston. Here we met the Dultson Alliance, a multi group alliance who’s member’s have a vested interest in the far northeast of Malton. We worked with the alliance to repair buildings and revive fallen survivors in Dulston and surrounding area. Dark Watch joined Anaconda to assist in retaking the mall and surrounding resource buildings. A highlight of this was a 15 person RT with members of both teams and led by Officer Duncan in Anaconda’s new program encouraging all team members to develop and run mini-ops. This OP was a huge success with a whopping 8 buildings cleared repaired and/or barricaded. Anaconda received news that a horde was coming our way. We had worked too hard and our allies were depending on us, so we bid farewell to our friends in Dark Watch as they moved out to start their mission, and we bunkered down and prepared to take a stand. Analyzing the available data we surmised that Whitlock NT would be the likely first target. Staying vigilant the team was the first to note the cades begin to drop, sounding the alarm and trying to rebuild the cades, Miss Elainious was PKed for her trouble. A swift revive by Tommy Crowbar put her back in the NT within minutes to terminate the PKer who had turned his guns on Tommy, as Miss E fought with the PKer Dedun fought of the attempts of a second spy to take out the NT’s genny and other team members kept the cades up with the other survivors , many of whom were our allies from the Dultson Alliance. By the end of the night The Dead had been beaten and slunk off with their tails between their legs after receiving an unexpected spanking by a hearty group of brave survivors. Anaconda left Dulston fully restored with new friends and a new alliance for The Fortress, the Dulston Alliance. Some Stats: Zeds Killed = 45 Buildings Repaired = 45 Buildings barricaded = 124 Survivors healed = 84 Generators installed = 12 Generators refuelled = 10 Survivors revived = 31 Casualties = 13 New Alliances = 3 Team Battlehawk For Ancient news of days gone by, see Battlehawk Archive Operation Vacation Written by Jay Gorman, August 15, 2008 As is well known, the Hawks are a happy-go-lucky bunch of friends that enjoy nothing more than responsibly and vigilantly protecting the suburbs of Malton. However, they work to the strict motto of “Work Hard- play 10 times harder. Give them half a chance once a situation has been dealt with, and the beer will be out, the salmon will be in hand, and the fish fights will break out. Commander Clint was a bit downbeat after the last Operation. There weren’t any fireworks or explosive ending. It kinda just….finished. Bring on Operation Vacation. We set off to reclaim the NT’s, take back our dear, dear Nichol’s Mall from the undead, and have an absolute blast in the process. We battled the Zeds and our beer-filled bodies for nearly a month, from May 13th to June 10th. This is an account of our Operation. Have you ever killed a Zed with a Hockey stick??? Commander Clintstone led the Battlehawks to Nichols Mall, finding it under attack by the horde. We attempted to clear the Zeds, using Vere Cinema as our main fall back location. Cecil fell early, but went out in style, killing one Zed with a Ski Pole!! Azula showed her class, killing notorious Lord Moloch with a Fencing Foil!! We congratulated Temp when he arrived, as he had successfully attained the assassin ABA on another high class Zed, Murray Jay Suskind. I continued my duties as the Medic Grizzly, healing and reviving my friends and fellow team members. I always hated Cricket, but that didn’t stop me from a Cricket Bat kill!! We needed to fight against the horde of standing Zeds, and coinciding PKer’s, who were knocking at the Cinema Door! We reclaimed the Went Building, as we all sang Piano Man by Billy Joel…didn’t we?? Azula kept us all updated on its condition, with a vigilant eye. We battled hard to retain it, but the horde rose in number. We battled hard, holding it. By May 24th we had successfully reclaimed Went NT and all 4 corners of Nichol’s Mall. The Hawks were on fire!! Commander Clint kept all of us motivated with some true words of inspiration. We are the Hawks!!!!! After the eventual fall of Went we spent time reviving, and turned our focus to the Greenhow NT. We retained our fall house Vere Cinema, and throughout this time secured and retained Greenhow. The pathway between safety house and NT was secured at all time through the hard work of the Hawks. But what’s this??? We have company. No other than our fellow CT, Excalibur, who were carrying out their own Operation in the vicinity of Vere Cinema. This was going to be even more fun, as it was the first Operation where I had worked with another CT. We continued to reclaim and lose Nichols so much that we were all tired of reporting each breach, but we kept going, coz that’s what we do!!! Our Op was coming to an end. We kept killing with every sporting good we could find, enjoying the Zed blood splattering over our clothes. Sure that is what sport is all about!! Greenhow was in survivors hands and The Mall was currently in top shape. We all got dressed up and had a Fashion Show. Zuton looked beautiful, as did all the females of the CT’s, but she just had that something special!!! We got word that there was going to be a mass chain kill with all CT’s linking up again. For now, the Hawks had finished here, but will return in time!!! Team Cold Cell For Ancient news of days gone by, see Cold Cell Archive Operation Firestorm Written by Victor Vandregas, August 14, 2008 Never, in all your years of playing Urban Dead, will you see a level of highly efficient coordination and indomitable power to match that displayed by Anaconda, Cold Cell and Dark Watch when we headed out to Fort Perryn with one objective on our minds - to take back the Fort with an epic triple-team assault. We’d been taking it easy in Blesley for a few days when Commander SubforM laid our plans. The first step was to run scouting missions across Pennville and the North-East area of Whittenside. This reconnaissance was vital; obtaining the necessary intelligence would allow us to gauge the zombie presence around Perryn and determine the best route into the area. When we had mapped out the suburb, we moved in, recading as many empty buildings as possible before retreating to the safety of the Mall. This process was repeated over a couple of days to monitor the zeds’ activities and ensure our survival among such a large horde. Once we’d gained a foothold in Pennville, we secured a number of safehouses and set up shop. This suburb would be the spearhead from which we would launch further raids on our target. We made sure our turf in Pennville was firmly under our control, then swept into Whittenside from the North-East, executing a pincer movement alongside Team Anaconda to secure our beachheads in the stricken suburb. We took and held predetermined safe houses, preparing ourselves for the next - and definitely biggest - phase of Operation Firestorm: The attack on Fort Perryn. Now is a good time to mention that we in The Fortress had a little help from our friends; namely the Cannonball Crew and the BMC. Our Ambassadors made sure these allies were on the same page. We set up conversations with whatever instant messaging systems we had. We psyched ourselves up for the monumental task ahead. At 20:00 hours on the 22nd May 2008... The first wave struck. The plan was beautiful in its simplicity; reclaim the Gatehouse, the cades of which the Cannonball Crew would maintain, then cleanse the Fort of the undead infestation. We were a phalanx; not even hordes of this size stood a chance against our combined might as we swept through the Fort like a flood, all but annihilating the zed presence. Within thirty minutes we were finished; with just a handful of zeds still standing and only the Armoury still ruined, the second wave would have an easy job mopping up. An hour later, the second wave moved in. In less than twenty minutes, the Armoury was back in business and the remaining zeds had been forcefully evicted. The easy part was over. Now came the hard part - holding the Fort against the massive horde outside. Soon enough, the retaliation began. The zeds struck out with a string of small break-ins, but they were (relatively) easily repulsed. After a day or so, the order came through for Anaconda to move out of the Fort and turn their attention to the local NecroTech buildings - because as one might expect, an organised horde would aim to cut off the supply of syringes. Needless to say, the Condas weren’t gonna let that happen. The break-ins came thicker and faster, with more and more zeds getting in. We managed to stay on top of the situation, but with zed reinforcements sure to arrive in great numbers, and a few zed spies wreaking havoc within the Fort’s walls, the whole scenario looked rather bleak. But that was all about to change. We received very welcome news that Team Dark Watch were en route, and other survivor groups were being summoned to the Fort. The game was most definitely on. A number of us headed to the thankfully operational Joachim Mall to restock. When the 27th came around, SubforM announced a plan that might win us this battle. He’d been conversing with other combat team CO’s and the leaders of other survivor groups about implementing a “drawbridge” approach to defending the Gatehouse. In the past, the Fort Perryn Defence Force had successfully held the Fort for over two weeks - against a Feral Undead horde numbering at least 150 - using this method. The idea is that the cades are held at EHB until a group of survivors needs to get in, at which time the cades are dropped to VSB. Once they’re inside, the cades are immediately brought back up to EHB. It requires considerable coordination from all involved, but it works like a charm. By this time, the defences had been breached and the Fort had fallen once again, with at least 30 zeds inside at any one time. Needless to say, this had us miffed - but, in a way, we had to thank the z-bags. Wanna know why? Because they gave us an excuse to plan the biggest RTS in the history of Malton. Having optimised their inventories at Joachim (kudos to Tommy Crowbar for his ingenious restocking philosophy), the combat teams made their way back down into Whittenside. Constant recon runs into the Fort kept us on the ball with regard to zed numbers and building conditions. The CO’s had been conversing with our allies and the timing for our planned attack was leaning towards Sunday. The plan was to go in, guns blazing, and completely clean house. At midnight on Sunday, the Gatehouse cades would be raised to EHB and the Fort would be completely locked down; no survivors in or out. We organised ourselves, rallied the participants, and at 5PM GMT on Sunday, we descended upon the Fort like Death himself, slaying every zed that stood in our way. The result was incredible; 27 zeds, several bodies and all but one ruined building before, no zeds, no DB’s, 3 lit buildings and cades as they should be after. Over 30 survivors took part in the attack; a truly unprecedented assault that should serve as an example for survivors all across Malton. This, my friends, is how it should be done. But, as one would expect, we weren’t out of the woods yet. There were 63 DB’s and 11 standing zeds outside, with almost 7 hours still to go before the big lockdown. Previous intel had led us to believe that the Feral Undead and the RRF had moved North to Fort Creedy, but they had since heard of our retake of Perryn and were talking of heading back down to crash the party. At midnight, as planned, the Fort was locked down - and immediately the break-ins began. However, with 30+ Fortress members keeping a steel-wall vigil over the cades, every break-in was quickly quelled and the cades bumped right back up. A few extra Fortress members - namely Warlord and CouponBaller towards the start of the lockdown - managed to squeeze in during the zed break-ins. Clever guys. For the most part, it was a matter of battling with the active zeds to keep the cades up. While they relentlessly attacked from outside, we worked frantically on the inside to keep the cades healthy. Despite the dangerous situation, there was no shortage of comedy as BlackOps1337 kept us all giggling with a whole new, vegetable-esque take on the Mudkip craze. By now, even the greens of Boot Camp were partying with us. Drill Sergeant Officer Duncan had brought the newbies along to help us keep the Fort firmly under survivor control, but after several days, he felt it was time for BC to bow out; the Fort was holding, with all break-ins deal with swiftly and the Gatehouse cades generally kept high. After a few more days, Team Anaconda left the Fort for pastures new, as per orders from Miss Elainious. They were soon followed by Cold Cell and Dark Watch as we moved out to prepare for our next operation. To say we were proud of ourselves would be a massive understatement. We’d held Fort Perryn against a sizeable horde for over a week. Every break-in was handled swiftly, and we were so well-equipped and well-coordinated that when a generator was destroyed, it was replaced and fuelled up in seconds. Operation: Firestorm stands as a true testament to the unparalleled skill, dedication and efficiency of The Fortress. Stay Vigilant! Crowbank - Operation: My Life with the Chain Kill Kult This article was written 11 March 2008 This article was written by Victor Vandregas Aside from "Santa Felt My Presents", I've never seen such an awesome name for an operation. And what an operation it was... The aim of a Chain Kill is to keep the chain going for as long as possible, with at least one recorded kill per hour. To date, the greatest Chain Kill acheived by a single Combat Squad was Team Battlehawk's assault on the Brennand Building, a NecroTech facility in Shore Hills. The chain lasted over 20 hours and was only brought to a halt when the 7-man team had slain all 25 attacking zombies. Needless to say, it set one hell of an example. My Life with the Chain Kill Kult was Team Cold Cell's attempt to surpass the Battlehawks' stellar performance in Shore Hills. As per the rules, the Chain Kill can only take place in a single target building; in our case, Burt Square Police Department in Crowbank. Our team consisted of 9 challengers: Ruinator, temporary Commander of the Cell, SubforM, who had stepped back into the ranks for this op, Max Dusseldorf, Sub's Lieutenant, Fishel, the Cell's legendary Havoc Knight, Amano Jaku, a seasoned veteran of the squad, Ulecqeldroma, a talented Battalion Ranger, Daishii, a Campaign Master of incredible skill, and finally myself and Mjrahabim, the not-so-new newbies out to claim our first ABA. It should be noted that another recruit, Beasty92, had been grounded for God knows how long, but has made a stylish return to active duty within the squad. He could not take part in the Chain Kill, and as such was not allowed to contribute to the Chain itself, but the support he gave us through healing our injured, helping to secure other buildings and generally Staying Vigilant was invaluable. The newly reinstated SubforM rewarded Beasty's hard work with a long overdue promotion to Engament Squaddie. Our original target had been elsewhere, but when I headed out to the predetermined HQ to find it - and almost every other building in the vicinity - ruined, I fell back to Crowbank. Using this information, Ruinator announced a new, spur-of-the-moment target; Burt Square PD. Being ruined, with a mob of zeds inside, and less than 5 AP from our HQ in Crowbank, it was the ideal spot for the Chain Kill to take place. And so the preparations began; the challengers dug into the suburb, helping the cause through healing and cading, all the while saving their huge amounts of ammo for the Chain Kill. Having had the challengers post in the preparation thread with times at which they would be available, Ruinator drew up a (relatively) flexible schedule. Once we were all ready, we got into position. At 17:00 GMT on Friday 7th March, the Chain Kill officially began. Ruinator was up first, claiming the first two kills before falling back due to low AP. Amano took the next kill, but not without a fight; he was attacked by a zed while claiming his kill. The two teamed up to grab the next kill at 20:00. Amano moved in again for another kill, again suffering a few injuries. The next kill, at 21:00, was handled by Max Dusseldorf. Fishel popped his head in and slew the next zed in just 5 AP. Max's turn again; he grabbed yet another kill. MJ moved in next, securing her first kill. Yours truly followed up with the next kill - my only kill of the Chain, since I was low on ammo and had to go to bed immediately after dropping my zed. Our dear CO SubforM handled the next kill. He, too, felt the sting of the active zambahz within the PD. About two pages of worried discussion later, Ulecqeldroma made his impression upon the zombie scum with his first kill of the Chain. MJ popped in again and claimed an easy kill; apparently, her second victim was below 10 HP. Fishel scored another kill; he seemed to be randomly turning up and laying the smackdown on some unfortunate zed before vanishing again. This was swiftly followed by a third kill from MJ, who had the AP and ammo for a fourth. She tried to claim said fourth kill, but was unlucky in terms of target and hit chances; she kept missing with her shots and the zed she was attacking was one of the annoying majority with Bodybuilding and a flak jacket. She fell back to a safe building, well and truly out of the Chain. Fortunately for her, Ulec picked up where she left off and slew the zed she had weakened, just in time to keep the Chain going. Ulec claimed yet another easy kill; a 12 HP zed whom Fishel's attacks had missed ten times in a row. Daishii made his contribution soon after. Sub stepped in, claiming a second kill and reducing another zed to 2 HP. Amano took the next kill and noted something which had us worried for a moment. The PD was running out of standing zeds. If no more would enter the building, the Chain was at risk of being broken. Nonetheless, we'd made the fifteen kills required for our Chain ABA. Ruinator attempted to keep the Chain going, but was 8 minutes too late, and thus the Chain was broken. I tried to slay a zed in the Leggetter Motel to celebrate, but just as I brought it below 15 HP, it became active and started attacking me. I was forced to retreat and wait to be healed. How's that for bad luck? Ruinator delcared the Chain Kill a success and officially handed command of Team Cold Cell back to SubforM, who promtly promoted Beasty92 for his outstanding work while we challengers put on the Chain ABA badge for which we'd worked so hard. We may not have surpassed Team Battlehawk, but we had a damn good shot at it, and of that we are all proud. This incredible Chain Kill is just one of many demonstrations of the determination, organization and brutal efficiency of the most powerful squad of survivors in all of Malton: Team Cold Cell. Stay Vigilant! Team Dark Watch No stories yet, but stay tuned! Older articles will be found in The Dark Watch Archive Around the Tavern A Malton Recession? By Private Mendoza, June 05, 2008 The latest news I've been hearing from around the bar, in dark alleys, and during the increasing random muggings (Please stop!) is this rumor of how Malton is in an economic recession. After much research, and numerous Post-Apocalyptic Government funded-studies, the accusations are seemingly true, and the main causes have been released. Historic depletions of weapon reservoirs, the influx of cheap illegal Dead labor, Urban Dying, lack of safe-working conditions, sup-prime mortgages, shoddy barricade contractors, and PKer terrorism are just a few of the problems being blamed. The problem is obvious in the hardest hit pockets of survivors as the value of Cheese has been weakened by inflation while the Barhah Union currency, Brains, is rising in value. Consequently, generator prices are up, barricade materials are hard to find in the less-populated parts of the city, weapons cost twice as much as in the BU, and even the usually well-off zombie-stripper industry is suffering. The Urban Dying crisis is a major factor. Of course Bullets are the most effective way to dispatch a zombie, but the urban supply is dwindling and AP cost is up. The eco(nomy)-minded survivor might want to convert to renewable resources, such as axes and knives, but they are still riddled with major problems like low accuracy, and low damage. The recession doesn't seem to be showing any signs of slowing, so start saving that hard-earned Cheese. Hopefully our city’s leadership can come up with some sort of plan to combat the crisis. Breaking News An old bank statement recieved from an inside source sheds light on secret love affair so well concealed it took over 20 bottles of Guiness to coax it out! Want to know the parties involved? Click: http://img389.imageshack.us/img389/1843/revelationbi9.jpg Out of Gossips? No!!!!! Seriously. We're working on it. While you are waiting for some fresh dirt, why don't you read the Gossips Archieve?