Dr. Schwan’s Essentials
Dr. Schwan’s Essentials
Dr. Schwan’s Essentials is a new product line developed by Whittenside’s own Dr. Albert Schwan. The Essentials contains products for dashing danger seekers, radiant ransackers, and scientists in the know. Dr. Schwan is even rumored to be working on practical products for the walking dead. Based in Whittenside’s historic Colglough Building, Dr. Schwan launched his product line in February 2010 with the release of his patented Zombie Repellent Hair Tonic and plans to follow it up with more product releases later in the year.
Current Product Line
Dr. Schwan’s Zombie Repellent Hair Tonic
Dr. Schwan’s Zombie Repellant Hair Tonic takes advantage of new breakthroughs in olfactory-microbiology, in particular the study of zombie pheromones. On his recent journeys through Malton, Dr. Schwan discovered that there is more to the rancid smell of an ordinary member of the undead hoard than rancid meat. I fact, there is something quite unique about the smell of a zombie. Further, he observed that zombies, for the most part, seem to hoard together, often traveling long distances to bash down a barricade en-masse. He became curious and set out to find out why. After numerous tests, Dr. Schwan discovered that zombies—though they are biologically dead—secrete a pheromone that attracts other zombies. By isolating and genetically modifying the gland responsible, he was able to create a pheromone that did exactly the opposite. As pleasant smelling as its attracting counterpart is foul, this pheromone repels zombies nonviolently. Thus was Dr. Schwan’s Zombie Repellent Hair Tonic born, allowing scientists to go about their work, military to do their duty, and civilians to continue being civil with a decreased chance of unwanted zombie attention.
To order and use Dr. Schwan’s Zombie Repellent Hair Tonic simply copy the code for the following tag to your user page
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Dr. Schwan's Essentials |
| This user proudly wears Dr. Schwan's patented Zombie Repellent Hair Tonic. |
Dr. Schwan’s Own Pre-Mortem Wrinkle Solution
All Necrotech employees are familiar with the peculiar way that the flesh of a zombie will quiver as the contents of the Necrotech syringe begin their slow molecular work. To Dr. Schwan this had always been a fascinating display of the inherent elasticity of the human biology. The commercial application of this process did not occur to him until, while performing a field revive on an older female survivor, he noticed that this noted biological perturbation caused the wrinkles in the zombified flesh of the woman smooth noticeably before the moment of revivification. If he could but isolate this effect, he could not only improve the features of his customers but reverse the damage that repeated zombification causes to the complexion. After repeated tests with sub-dermal applications performed on his own person, Dr. Schwan came across a solution that, while it did not have any effect on living tissue, remained dormant in the surfacet issue for up to 24 hours. With the assistance of a couple of research zombies, he eventually, discovered that it was possible to preventatively treat small portions of the anatomy to receive a partial revivification at the point of death. The face being the most marketable of the affected areas, The DR’s Own Pre-Mortem Wrinkle Solution was the obvious result.
To order and use Dr. Schwan’s Own Pre-Mortem Wrinkle Solution simply copy the code for the following tag to your user page
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Dr. Schwan's Essentials |
| This user discretely benifts from Dr.Schwan's Pre-Mortem Wrinkle Solution. |
Dr. Schwan Brand Optical Paralytic
To order and use Dr. Schwan Brand Optical Paralytic simply copy the code for the following tag to your user page
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Dr. Schwan's Essentials |
| Is this user out of AP? You will never know thanks to Dr. Schwan Brand Optical Paralytic Eyedrops. |
Bag-Man Schwan’s Nabra!nzbarg Bra!nz
Having observed the effect of revivification fluid on human tissue, Dr. Schwan began to wonder about its potential on other dead specimens. During his travels he had come across squirrels, tigers, an own and a few other creatures who seemed to respond identically to the solution experiencing full revivification. As an experiment at Miscotonic U, he had even tried a predecessor to the Necrotech solution on a severed limb, with violent and unpredicted results that lead to the hospitalization of two lab assistants. Presumably because of the solutions built in imperative to reconstruct cerebral tissue first, the arm developed a brain-like growth near the wrist, the removal of which proved to b the only method for terminating the experiment. Post experiment vivisection revealed the tumor to be capable of sending out base motor impulses through rudimentary synapses but incapable of any degree of conscious thought or malice, making its action truly mysterious. In his recent attempts to follow up on this research and push the limits of revivification fluid application, the doctor attempted—under carefully controlled conditions—to apply the solution to an amalgamated lump of bean curd and spam. The result: the lump of matter formed itself into a near perfect human brain with only a slight color variation from the genuine article. Attempts at transplantation proved that the brain did not have the capacity to stimulate a body or to reason as electrical activity was only very minimal and will was altogether absent. Prepared to call the experiment a failure, Dr. Schwanhad just heaved the remnants into a bin, when a zombie incursion into the facility allowed two zombies to gain access to his lab. Set to defend himself, Dr. Schwan watched in amazement as the zombies cried BRA!NZ and began to devour his test materials. Revivifying both zombies, the doctor quickly began work on what would eventually become BAG-MAN SCHWAN’S NABRA!NZBARG BRA!NZ.
To order and use BAG-MAN SCHWAN’S NABRA!NZBARG BRA!NZ simply copy the code for the following tag to your user page
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Dr. Schwan's Essentials |
| BAG-MAN SCHWAN’S NABRA!NZBARG BRA!NZ. HARMANZ AHM HRANS NAH BARG Z!NGZ. |
