Malton Crowd Control
NOTE: This page was originally a parody of the Malton Uprising. Recently however, somebody who is clearly not Securss on yet another forum alt, has totally changed that page. The main editor of this page apologizes for the new discrepancy between the two pages, and would like to assure you all that this will be changed as soon as he stops laughing enough to get some work done.
Vindication
The DEM Crowd-Control division has recently caught wind of certain plans to "Liberate" the populace from our "iron-fisted rule" and "seal-clubbing ways". But that's a lie! In fact, Comrade Kristi of the Dead has decreed that things have never been better for Maltonians than they are right now, which is great. If you see any DEM Officers beating, killing, or otherwise disabling members of the so-called "Malton Uprising", they likely broke one of the following DEM laws.
- Insulting a DEM officer or our glorious leader Comrade Kristi of the Dead.
- Anti-civil actions.
- Conspiracy to commit anti-civil actions.
- Conspiracy to conspire to commit anti-civil actions.
- Making eye contact with DEM officers.
- Failure to read, watch, or listen to only DEM-Approved media.
- Failure to attend weekly beating sessions.
Therefore, do not look at the DEM officers or the so-called "Freefom fighters", rather just ignore it, walk 1 block away, and sing a song about how great the DEM is! Failure to do so will result in a beating.
Day of Freedom
Today
The DEM works hard to protect your freedom from Fascist rule every day!
Instructions
On the above date, all who wish to partake in the beautiful spread of DEM Authority should do their very best to be a good citizen! Tips on doing so listed below.
- Loving DEM members!
- Spraying over anti-DEM sprays!
- Spraying Pro-DEM sprays!
- DEM speeches! Lots of them!! (radio, voice)
- Healing DEM!
- Reviving them!
- Anything else that is Pro-DEM!
Remember, our glorious leader Comrade Kristi of the Dead has decreed that all populace of Malton will love the DEM or be beaten.
Pieces of Reason
Youtube video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU
The DEM is just awesome, you don't need a reason!
