The Laughing Dead


Har Har Har!

Meet the Gang!

We are all just so happy to see you!

HahtDahg!

Braht

Nahm

Dahg (Retired)

Clahrn (Retired)

Zhef (Retired)

Happah (Retired)

Znaggar (Retired)

How we all met

Outside of a needle house, some of the zombies in a mob started standing towards the back. They did not fit in with the big, serious zombies so much because, well, they seemed kind of dull - bang bang bang sway - that's all they ever did.

Also, some of them were mean to the young ones.

A couple of the zombies at the back started to tell jokes to the little ones and help them with the food, who kept hiding their tasty bodies inside the buildings.

That was very selfish of the food.

Food is meant to be played with. Food should be fun.

Now, the little ones are growing big and strong. They can play Hide and Seek with the food too! Everyone enjoys the games! Even the food - you can tell because they dance around and make all kinds of noises before they fall down.

It makes us laugh.

"Generators are evil, they make lies. I think that's what's wrong with smeggie. He's in it with the generators"
"Ooh! Liberry tour! {bounce bounce bounce] {nose falls off} {sticks nose back on} {bouncing a bit more gingerly}"

The Food

Many Yesterdays Ago - We said thank you to the food of Shore Hills, for being warm and squirty and filling our stomachs with your salty goodness! The time had come to leave, but only because we had found new friends! The UndeadFER were our new playmates. They liked playing with food too, so we all went to Pashenton where we got to eat some Panda! And drink vodka!

Several Yesterdays Ago - Some people said we were naughty. Some people (might) have said we were Gods. We said we are Zombies. Put all together, and what have you got? That's right! The Naughty Zombie Gods!!!!! With our Russian friends, the Naughty Zombie Gods we roamed the town and sampled cuisine from many, many fine establishments.

Some Yesterdays Ago - Some of us went to this big bash some other zombies were having and had a big dinner party! Some of us decided to become more political and protest the Lifeist ways of The Big Prick.

A Few Yesterdays Ago - Only Haht Dahg remained, roaming in search of food, even becoming the owner of a cinema at one time!

But Now - Braht has come home! And a nice new zambah lady has come too! She likes books very much and so we are going to the book houses so she can bite all of you bad people making too much noise and looking at pron on the Necronet. (But if you give her a fez, she might let you off with a warning.)

"Nothing more humiliating than having Clown make up smudged over your corpse... Then again, Mustard might top that..." "Yeah, he had quite a bit of clown make up smeared over him... ...Kinky!"
Jonh Rubin said "Fuckers..."

How We Play

We like to have fun, eat, and laugh.

Sometimes though, some food will stick us with a needle and then that strange thing happens where your chest goes up and down and your heart feels funny and thumps a lot.

We can only think that the food wants to play games with us!

So we play games with the food, even though we get very hungry and lonely for our friends. We play Tag, and Tennis, and Hide and Seek, and Hey, I Got a New Shiny Toy That Makes a LOT of Noise!

"This is like an Easter Egg hunt, it is - you look in all the hiding places, find the treats, peel the wrappers off and pop them in your mouth! I wish the food came in foil, not skin, it would be so much more colorful!"
"I will go and see if the food has returned to the needle house. It is sort of like a noodle house. In both cases, it is acceptable to make slurping noises to show how much you enjoy the food."

But!

We never, ever, play with the food so hard that it dies. We never kill when we are revived. That's not fair.

We may play rough with some things, like generators and barricades - light hurts our eyes and we want our friends to come inside and play.

But if we are alive - we won't kill you.

We will just let our hungry friends do it.

"There was, like, this funny guy, he was totally outside, sleeping on a park bench, and, so, like, I asked him if he'd like to be my date, you know?

I know, RIGHT?

He didn't say anything so I like took some bites out of him. You know? He was totally delicious. For a, like, nondescripto. You know?"

"I understand that two of our little baby zombies have been revived! It is so sad! How will they eat? I hope they take care. It is very scary in there with all of the lights and the live people. You should turn the lights off. Dark is better.

Dark makes me giggle.

*hee*"

So...

If you see us around, just remember.

We just want to be your friends and have you for dinner!

"I cried and beat my fists on the door until one fell off. I do not even wish to go to their stupid party any longer."
"I was inside Brennard! It was lovely. I will admit though, I sampled like a candy box. A frothy bite of petrovich z, a bite of Muzhlan. Did I mention that my mouth now tastes all funny? I am back outside now, sleeping off a happy day. But I am always happy. ALWAYS."

With love,

The Laughing Dead

"Romul has gone to one of my very favourite places! the Fih Bank! If I can get in, once I've eaten, I can look over the accounts... The new food is in the other favourite place, I like Stroud, not just because it's a bank, but because Anita is often there! And I love Anita."
"Some person popped out and went and stood in front of the needle house. I, like, totally took some bites of him, coz, like you know? I know! You know? And then he, like, totally DNA extracted me and stood there. I got weirded out and went to stay with Henteman! Coz, like ewww. weird! Hoomans are krreeee-peeee!"