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Important Notice
As this is the UBCS' paper, expect inside jokes.
STOP THE PRESSES!
- DITPS Declares War On UBCS!
- Haliman: "The Dead are rising!"
- Everyone Else: "Take your damn pills old man!"
- FOXHOUND Admits Paper Is Awesome.
- Metfan admitted Thursday that Containin' Weekly was "A little more awesome than FOXHOUND."
- Haliman took this as an insult.
- Umbrella NOT A Fake.
- Umbrella head Thadeous Oakley G. was to make an appearance Friday. Someone DID step up to the podium. However, it was clearly Haliman in a suit and with sunglasses.
- This proves scientists theories that Haliman and Thadeous are the same person.
- Raven Asks For Promotion!
- Raven87 asked for a promotion this week. He wished for his title to change from "UBCS 1337 Spammer" to "Supreme Overlord of Spam." Haliman said if he spammed more he would change it.
- The UBCS officially disbanded that day due to the forums an heroing.
Meet an Ally
This week: FOXHOUND!
The butt of all our jokes. All jokes aside though, they suck they were invaluable helping us in Gibsonton a while back when we first moved to Santlerville. Keep up the good work and don't get butthurt!
Awards
- Most Patience'
- Deathwire and Metfan - For getting made fun of every week so far and not retaliating.
- Least Patience
- Deathwire and Metfan - For continuously asking when the next issue of Containin' Weekly will come out.
- Fail Of The Week
- Deathwire and Metfan - For not realizing Containin' WEEKLY comes out every WEEK.
You Know You're A UBCS Member When...
...You're 20 feet tall.
...You make jokes about Meth.
...You help Haliman cross the street
...You spam EVERYTHING to oblivion.
From the senile old man's office
No new additions this week. Expect a delay, or less of these issues now, as I have called it a day and strung up the boots. That's right, I'm retired. It's been a pleasure serving with my fellow UBCS members, and great to make all of you people laugh.
Sincerely,
Senile Old Man
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