Mayor of Malton/2010

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Revision as of 12:00, 3 June 2010 by Imthatguy (talk | contribs) (Small words for stupid people)
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The Mayoral Election of 2010

Malton has always had a rich and colourful history. In 1912, a Great Fire swept the city. In 2005, the city was over-run by zombies. But in 2007, the city chose to elect a new mayor to preside over the madness. That mayor was Murbulskond. For a time, Murbulskond ruled justly and impartially as Mayor. However, such a time of peace is over. And now, in their darkest hour, the people of Malton have decided to elect a new mayor. And so begins the Mayoral race of 2010...


Candidates

The Major Parties

The Zombiecratic Party (Incumbent)

Example Candidate

Example Statement.

The Humanative Party

Misanthropy

A bullet in every face. A knife in every back. A pinata in every building. If elected, I shall rule through fear, and with an iron fist. Justice will be swift and brutal. Generators will be a thing of the past, and barricades shall serve only as weapons of oppression. I shall reach out diplomatically to our zombie opponents, and hand-in-hand, we shall reach a new future of nightmare desolation. Mankind under my rule shall be obliterated, outlawed, and possibly sued. A vote for Misanthropy, is a vote for misanthropy.
Thank you. We're coming to get you, Barbara 17:53, 2 June 2010 (BST)

The Minor Parties

The Example Party

Yonnua Koponen

Running Mate: Mr Suggestor

Running Mate (With Corporeal Form): Umbrella-White.pngThadeous OakleyUmbrella-White.png

Ladies and Gentlemen, do you ever feel like the parties are just bland statements? No? Well then, how would you like to support a party so bland that it is simply the "Example Party". If elected as mayor, Yonnua Koponen would conduct full and absolute Mime Searches to arrest any renegade mimes. Donkeys would become the new patron animal of Malton, and would be filled in to every orifice. Yes, even THAT orifice. Also, all orphans would be given unto the void to fill it with victory and win. If you want to help in our new movement, please sign up at our recruitment counter. Also pudding. And how many other candidates can say that? Pudding. Just think about that for a moment.

Think Pudding. Think Koponen.

--Yonnua Koponen Talk ! Contribs 19:25, 2 June 2010 (BST)

The Maltonian Separatist Party

Oidar

Survivors, zombies, murderers, donkeys, comrades - Today is the day that things change. Today is the day we become what we should have become a long time ago. Today, we become free!

For too long, Malton have been left at the mercy of those who no longer care. The Glorious City has for years been the subjects of an unjust master and a feral pack of clowns. No longer! Malton has been abandoned by its liege. What help have we received? How long was it since the last crate of supplies was dropped? Have the UK, the EU or the UN done even the slightest to help us? No! We have been left alone in the dirt, shunned and stopped from entering a world which no longer wants us around. We deserve better than this!

We must do something about this - Nobody else will! Therefore, I will if elected proclaim Malton an independent, sovereign state - Free of outside oppression and hostile influence. We shall from then and into eternity be known as the Democratic People's Republic of Malton, led by myself. There will be no relations with other states, there will be no representatives in the UN or EU, there will be no foreign embassies on the soil of the Glorious City - It shall be we who blocks of the outside world, not the other way around.

For the Glorious City, for freedom, for the motherland and the Dear Leader. Oidar 11:57, 3 June 2010 (BST)

The Great Blob Party

|The Chilean Blob

Running Mate: Dr summeroff

"He's already been a savior, a god, a judge and a jury...why not add Mayor to his vast array of titles? Who better than the gelatinous master to rule over Malton's diverse population base?" The great Chilean Blob of 2003, the great gelatinious master rules the sea. But this is not enough! He wants to look after youtr lives directly, he wants to hold you all in his embrace.

The Great Blob will hold the tide and stop the great flood from destroying our beloved city, he will protect you, the people of Malton from the other great creatures of the sea who wish nothing more than to devaour your souls.

The good Doctor Summeroff will be here to make sure that every will of the Great One is put in place, he will be the great One's voice and it's hand.

Voting for the Great One will ensure the protection of this city. --Michalesonbadge.pngTCAPD(╯°□°)╯ ┻━┻ 12:55, 3 June 2010 (BST)


The Green Peace Party

Some Asshole Named Imthatguy

Help me do absolutely nothing. Well... maybe the legalization of weed--Weed.jpgArthur DentWeed.jpg BIN LADEN IS DEAD!!!!! 12:59, 3 June 2010 (BST)