CRASH

CRASH
Abbreviation:	CRASH
Group Numbers:	10+
Leadership:	AlphaGun2, Die Endegner
Goals:	To roam free
Recruitment Policy:	CRASH coordinates via MSN and Yahoo. Only users of these services may join.
Contact:	thedarkride2003@yahoo.com.

CRASH began long before the outbreak in Malton. AlphaGun2 and his faithful sidekick Endegner created this group as their own private strike force dedicated to striking down anyone they didn't like. The term CRASH stood for "Community Resources Against Shit Heads" and took the community of Yagoton by the balls and induced fear among the citizens. If CRASH didn't like you, you would be promptly shaved, beaten, and gangraped before finally being executed. CRASH's reign became threatened when a group of a UFO chasing hippies began to populate within Yagoton. Chasing bright lights in the sky, shadows in the street, and attacking blue and red trucks, these dumbos began to irritate CRASH with their inane behavior. Shortly after the dubbed "UFO Hunters" appeared, CRASH sprang into action and began waging war against them. Shortly after, CRASH became bored with destroying the odd group of nerds, and soon left Yagoton in search of fresh blood to spill. Once in Peppardville, CRASH engaged in many epic battles against a variety of dumbos including a corrupt goverment known as The Knights of the Roundtable. Led by Pyrohazard and other social outcasts with boners for authority, these were the most avid opposers of CRASH. Soon after, CRASH once again became bored, and sought out new battles. Moving to Pitneybank, CRASH became inactive. CRASH had lost intrest in bloodshed, and soon began living normal lives. Endegner became a law abiding Lumberjack, who enjoyed quarrels with his family and shaving his head. AlphaGun2, became a drug dealer and a lover of animals. Their worlds soon came crashing down when the outbreak occured in all of Malton. With no trees to cut, Endegner no longer had a source of income, and stooped to stealing, mugging, and other such thuggery and tomfoolery. AlphaGun2, seperated from his animals, drugs, and Super Nintendo, went insane from the loss of his once stable enviroment. Soon, the two teamed up once again and joined a viscious group known as the Pumpkin Pedophiles. Intent on causing as much havoc and destruction as possible, the duo fit in nicely with their newfound friends.

Defection

Eventually, AlphaGun2 became fed up with Lezick of the PP and began considering an attack against them, feeling Lezick wasn't giving him the mad propz he deserved. After 5 seconds of thought, AlphaGun2 waged war on the PP and shook the very foundations that Pitneybank was laid on. With zombies invading the suberb, AlphaGun2 focused only on the destruction of the Pumpkin Pedophiles, and with his old friend Endegner, AlphaGun2 brought back CRASH and charged into battle with the PP.

Fagnarok: The end of the world

Fagnarok had begun. Citizens of Malton were convinced the end of the world was near. Zombies had taken Fort Creedy and Pitneybank itself was in flames as Survivors struggled to drive back the zombie menace. Murderers were slaughtering people left and right, and a terrible war between the PP and CRASH had everyone convinced the world was facing it's final days. Pumpkin Pedophiles were cocky, feeling CRASH was no threat to them, but they quickly discovered CRASH was unlike any force they had ever encountered. CRASH hunted them down ruthlessly, attacking them at every turn. PP realized they were in for a real battle. CRASH claimed their first victory against the PP one night during a full moon. CRASH quickly found PP by following the putrid stench of semen that the chronic masturbaters of the Pumpkin Pedophiles leave behind and opened fire on their safehouse. Having taken down the bulk of PP's forces there, they continued the hunt. Eventually, they found FISHFASE, a rookie member of PP and butchered him like a baby pig. Having widdled down the Pumpkin Pedophiles to only 2 members, CRASH began their final battle. Leaving their forces behind them, AlphaGun2 and Endegner marched towards the PP's HQ located in Spracklingbank for a clash with Lezick and Neo Nazi. After a brief moment of silence, the 4 legendary trouble makers opened fire. Endegner and Neo Nazi quickly fell during the battle, leaving only Lezick and AlphaGun2 in an ironic twist of fate.

Truce

Thw two battled for hours. AlphaGun2 lacked the fire power of Lezick, while Lezick lacked the cunning strategic mind of Alpha. With AlphaGun2 beginning to lose intrest and tire of the battle(Feeling it was unnatural for such powerful creatures to be fighting amonst one another) , and Lezick beginning to fear defeat, the two began to question whether or not it was worth it. Soon, Alpha made Lezick an offer.

"Earth and Water." he said.

Lezick, puzzzled by this riddle responded "Earth and Water? You come all the way from Pitneybank...For Earth and Water?!"

AlphaGun2 then explained in a less crytic and homofaggotry tone.

"Join CRASH or die. It is that simple."

Lezick pondered this for a moment. Soon realizing that he would gain much more from accepting an alliance with CRASH rather than a war, he agreed.

Alliance

Rather than disband CRASH and work solely for the PP, Lezick felt it would be best if CRASH remained an independant group and instead worked with the Pumpkin Pedophiles as allies. This would avoid future leadership clashes (supposedly), dick wagging contests, and other such disputes.

Betrayed

PP betrayed CRASH once again. Lezick and Neo Nazi decided to leave the area, and being cowards, also decided to betray CRASH before they left. They opened fire on all CRASH members, injuring them all and then fled as far as their legs could carry them. PP consider this a victory and will not think twice about bragging about it to all they meet. However AlphaGun2 saw this for what it was: A cowardly attack by people who cannot bear to face the might of CRASH.

CRASH Archived Battles

CRAPP: Community Resources Against Pumpkin Pedophiles

The now infamous battle that revived CRASH. This was an important victory for CRASH as it laid the foundation for which it sits on today. Like with most wars, the defeated joined ranks with the victor, and CRASH and PP are now allied forces that look after each other.

CRABB: Community Resources Against Big Bash

CRASH may be notorious for harming, but in this case CRASH had began to take notice of the Big Bash and it's advance against Giddings and Morrish. The PP embraced a zombie victory against Morrish and Creedy, while CRASH did not. This marked the first time since their alliance that CRASH and PP had differing views on a situation. As a result, PP went one way and CRASH went another. CRASH began killing zombies and aiding the survivors, while Pumpkin Pedophiles chose to kill survivors and aid the zombies. Despite differing objectives the two armies never stepped on each others toes and no conflicts arose. For both CRASH and PP however the campaign resulted in failure. PP Leader Neo Nazi found himself constantly being killed by wannabe heroes while CRASH became distracted with other events. Soon, CRASH as well came under fire by uknown people, possibly PKers. AlphaGun2 was taken down among various other CRASH and PP members and soon CRASH faced total destruction. With CRASH and PP reeling from assaults and running low on supplies, CRABB ended in failure.

CRASHED

Facing extinction, CRASH was struggling to repair itself after a large string of PK attacks. CRASHED was a successful operation, and now all CRASH members are alive and kicking. Pity goes to all their enemies!

Operation CRASH: Community Resources Against Super Heroes

CRASH was fed up with wannabe heroes who kept killing Pumpkin Pedophile and CRASH members and decided to target these groups specifically. Attacking many groups, Operation CRASH was a great success. Eventually, the major targets had fled, leaving only minor targets that CRASH had minimal interest in. With zombies ruining buildings daily, and CRASH members beginning to die at their hands, Operation CRASH was considered a success and put away in favor of waging war on the zombies next and aiding Giddings.

CRACK: Community Resources Against Cowards and Kire

This one didn't last long. The cowards inside Giddings all ran, leaving it ripe for zombie picking. CRASH only made one attack, attacking what few survivors remained. Only one attack was made against Kire in this mission as well. The mission wasn't much of a success

Current Missions

CRAPP2: Community Resources Against Pumpkin Pedophiles

CRAPP2 mission was put into play when the cowardly Pumpkin Pedophiles decided to shake their tiny e-penises at CRASH and betray them in a cowardly fashion; opening fire on all CRASH team members in the same hideout CRASH allowed the PP to stay in. Rest assured, the PP won't have a PeePee to wave anymore once CRASH is through with them, as Lezick has soon learned. All other missions have been put on halt as the PP and CRASH are once again enemies.

CRAMMD: Community Resources Against MDD

After a month of randomly killing MDD members, a select few MDD soldiers made a counter attack, killing 3 CRASH members. Now, CRASH and MDD are enemies. MDD has large numbers, but CRASH has many warriors.

CRAM: Community Resources Against Meatheads

A strange green fellow attacked CRASH one night, angered that CRASH had assassinated him. CRASH has now decided to slaughter all Meathead members. What few there are anyway.

Rumors

When a legendary force like CRASH arises, there are bound to be rumors. This is a section dedicated to addressing these rumors.

Pumpkin Pedophiles in Disguise

This is the the most common rumor and it makes no fuckin' sense whatsoever. For one thing, why would PP ever go to such lengths? Would PP really take the time to make 10 accounts and make an entire wiki for the fake group? More so, there have been screenshots of CRASH and PP fighting. In the screenshot you will see the man himself: AlphaGun2 along with Endgegner killing PP member Fido14. The other 2 dead bodies are Neo Nazi and Lezick. Also CRASH and PP rarely work together. The first instance of the two groups working together would be Operation CRASH, and the two groups have become enemies once again so this rumor is debunked further.

Pumpkin Pedophile Zergers

The 2nd most common rumor. How exactly people came to this conclusion is uknown, since PP and CRASH rarely work together. The fact of course is that these are 2 seperate groups entirely. CRASH in fact began as enemies of the PP and only after a cooridinated assault did the they make peace and become allies. CRASH are NOT Zergers. People only think CRASH are Zergers because for one thing they're fucking retarded, but mostly because CRASH leads coordinated assaults. CRASH is a small but very tight group of people who almost always work together and strike at the same time unless the option isn't available. Teamwork is so uncommon on UD, that people automatically assume that a group of people working together are actually the same person using multiple accounts. Tis a sad fact but true.

PP and CRASH are now enemies and likely shall remain that way for an eternity. The idea of them being zergers for the PP is further debunked by this fact as well.

Zombie Spies and Trenchcoaters

People on UD spend more time making blind accusations than they do actually doing what they intend to do. Such as defending a Mall. One such accusation is this one. Trenchcoater no doubt came from an offer CRASH made Giddings. CRASH merely offered to assist Giddings, and within minutes there came a swarm of ingrates riding upon their high horses on the radio screaming "WE DONT NEED NOR WANT THE AID OF PKING SCUM!!!" at the top of their little tiny lungs. To this CRASH replied that they would help speed up the downfall of Giddings. Now people think CRASH are trenchcoaters.

No one is sure where exactly "Zombie spies" came from, and as a result that issue cannot be addressed, however it can be said that CRASH are not Zombie Spies. We have conflicts with the zombies just like everyone else. Why would we aid them? In the case of Giddings CRASH is less "aiding" the zombies and more like extracting some random revenge upon the uptight inhabitants of Giddings.

Annihilated by PP

This is a false rumor started by the PP. CRASH allowed the Pedophiles to stay with them in a safehouse, which was not unusual. They one day attacked suddenly while CRASH was asleep. However, annihilated is a bold term to use, as all 8 CRASH members were not only up on the same day, but made a counter attack against Lezick as an official declaration of war.

In fact, it may be worth noting that all 4 members of the PP were all dead, while CRASH had already fully recovered and had began gathering ammo for the coming war.

[1] [2] [3] [4]

They also executed an innocent bystander named Sephiroth the Assassin, under the mistaken impression he was in CRASH.

[5]

Leadership

AlphaGun2

AlphaGun2 Born inside a chickenhouse, Alpha has a natural love for animals. A love he expresses every night to them. Despite several occassions where he was dropped on his head by his mother, and struck upon by his father, Alpha is quite intelligent. However, at the age of 6, he was caught "loving" one of the chickens in the chickenhouse, and he was chased away from his home by his father, whom was carrying his shotgun. Alpha never forgot the fear he felt that night, or the sorrow that followed the seperation of his beloved animals. As a result of this traumatic moment, Alpha has become a tad bit insane. He found companionship in his new friend: The Nintendo Entertainment System and he quickly forgot his beloved animal friends. As he matured, he later acquired a dog named Peabody, whom rekindled Alphas love for animals. Alpha enjoyed his new life with Peabody and obscure video games that no one has ever played. He acquired income through Drugs, he surrounded himself with video games and animals, and things were looking good for Mr. AlphaGun2. Despite his obesity, heart problems, and daily struggles to get out of the bed ill made for his weight, AlphaGun2 was content. However disaster struck when the outbreak occured. During the confusion, Alpha was seperated from his animals and he was forced to leave his home. When he later returned, he found his home ransacked, his PS2 and other games had been stolen, and his animals were no where to be found. Cursing the Gods and humanity, Alpha went to arms and waged war on all living creatures of Malton. Zombie and Survivor alike. His wrath will not end until he is once again alongside his only friends.

Alpha's brutality earned him the attention of the PP, who understood Alpha's anger at losing his most cherished friends. Neo Nazi informed Alpha of their noble plight, and Alpha felt that he was finally among his own kind. Misunderstood warriors who were exiled from Society simply for loving someone. Taking up his trusty shotgun, Alpha joined the PP and vowed to rid Malton of it's plauge, find his old friends, and begin a new life with the PP and the children of Malton!

The redneck of the group, AlphaGun2 is prone to random ranting about obscure video games that no one ever plays. This obese hick is known to have heart problems and cannot survive without his Xanax due to the beatings he received in childhood. These factors combine to make him an unstable person and he won't think twice about killing you or himself. AlphaGun2's goal is to free Malton of its plague: Human life. Never turn your back to this angry nerdy hick because he will surely anally rape you the moment you do so. As a note, AlphaGun2 is difficulty to control, and very unpredictable.

Currently, AlphaGun2 has allied himself with a new friend named Die Endgegner, and the two are on a warpath in Malton. AlphaGun2 is someone no one wants to be on the bad side of, and now that he has paired himself with a similar sociopath, Malton may very well be facing it's final days.

AlphaGun2 is also very animal-like. His constant exposure to animals has left him with animal instincts. Rage driven and fiercly territorial, Alpha often marks his territory, warning those that pass through that they are on his property. Should this warning be ignored, the person will find themselves quickly set upon by the vicious wrath of AlphaGun2. Should you ever find yourself in his territory, your best bet is to quickly leave the building. Should you remain or perhaps assault/kill Alpha or any of his allies while they sleep, you will be subjected to sodomization. Stepping inside the property of AlphaGun2 and causing trouble is about as intelligent as wacking a beehive and calling the Queen a whore.

Die Endgegner

Die Endgegner

A German Immigrant with an obsession with rape and bunny outfits. Often spotted violently raping helpless women of recently murdered husbands and sometimes the deceased bodies of his victims themselves(depending on the level of abuse his victims have bestowed upon their child). An abused orphan during childhood, he has a grotesque hatred for child abusers and neglectful parents, and will kill anyone he suspects to fit into this category, and even rape them out of spite if he's got a woody that won't go away. Usually dressed in his trade mark, old torn and dirty bunny outfit that was given to him as a "gift" by his alcoholic step father, He cover's his battered and deform face with a cracked bunny mask that has the word "welp" carved into it. Was recruited into the Pumpkin Pedophiles after a one Alphagun2 witnessed him murder 4 abusive parents, and rape 7 neglectful mother's before setting them ablaze and then jerking off into their ashes when they finally perished into the dark pits of hell, but now has left the PP to form CRASH with Alphagun2.

Sharing similar insanity akin to Alpha's, the two were a natural pair for senseless murder. A modern-day Malton version of Bonnie and Clyde. Nothing struck fear into the hearts of survivors quite like the sight of a 6'6 fat bearded hick in a black sweatsuit and a german in a pink bunny suit wearing a "welp" mask. The two terrorize Malton, randomly killing anyone they see. Although their primary interest is the 25th Police Regiment and similar survivor groups, their random killing also strikes zombies and fellow murderers as well.

The End

After a period of destruction, killing, and good fun, CRASH was eventually disbanded.

AlphaGun2

After making an attack on USAI, slaughtering a huge number of them, they retreated to a nearby building for shelter. Rather than issue orders to move to a safer location, AlphaGun2 realized he was tired of everything. He was tired of running, killing, and everything else related to Malton. AlphaGun2 then took his own life.

Die Endgenger

Upon realizing the life of his long time companion had been snuffed out by his own gun, En also took his own life. Putting the stress of Malton life behind him.

CRASH

CRASH itself died along with it's 2 leaders. Will CRASH ever rise again? Unlikely. The CRASH Legacy belonged to En and Alpha, and with their demise the CRASH Legacy must follow. Perhaps in the future this will change. Perhaps a new generation will take the CRASH name once again and fight for the glory of CRASH. The future for CRASH is uncertain.

Rebirth

Recent reports have been circulating that a fat hillbilly strongly resembling AlphaGun2 has been spotted in the vicinity of Tollyton. Could the ancient warrior somehow still be alive? Has he risen from the ashes? Or is it merely an impersonator carrying on the CRASH tradition? The truth may never be known.

‎	Player Killer
	"One kills a man, one is an assassin; one kills millions, one is a conqueror; one kills everybody, one is a god." This user is a PKer and supports the act of Player Killing.

	Silent Night Slaughter
	Ho!Ho!Ho!Ho!Ho! This user or group caroled and celebrated with the residents of Fort Creedy on Christmas Eve in December 2007!!!

	Fascists
	This user or group hates fascists and will do everything in their power to feed them to the zombies.