Club Simpson

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Club Simpson
Mallrat The Spanish Inquisition TSI The Kilt Store TKS Clubbed to Death CTD 07:16, 23 January 2023 (UTC)
Club Simpson

Osmondville [80, 73]

the Menhennet Museum
Malcolm Avenue Vawer Walk Police Department
Blesley Mall
Club Simpson Hagger Square
Blesley Mall
Mechel Grove Godolphin Drive

Basic Info:

  • Clubs are Dark buildings.
  • The usual internal description of a Club reads as follows:
    "…in the near-darkness of the main dancefloor."
  • When powered by a portable generator, the internal description changes to the following:
    "Coloured spotlights highlight an empty stage, and distorted music echoes over the speakers."
  • Clubs can be barricaded normally.

Club Simpson


An imposing concrete building surrounded by railings.

Guest DJ Rolf Harris whips the mob into a beat-induced frenzy


Welcome to Club Simpson!

Formerly a headquarters of UD Fark ("Cozy and warm, Club Simpson is a haven for drunken Farkers everywhere"), Club Simpson was taken over by bpm-craving zombies for several weeks in early 2009, despite repeated attempts by Blesley Mall occupants to oust them. Club Zedson's sister club, Club Wadman (aka Zedman) in Gulsonside, was the original Z-Club disco, offering hip beats and hip bones to undead ravers from across Malton.

Barricade Policy

This building should be barricaded at Very Strongly Barricaded per the Osmondville Barricade Plan

Old Policy

Current barricade policy is DWO/EHB, depending on whether the ravers inside are undead or alive (or 80s popsters, 'Dead or Alive').

Current Status

February 16, 2012

Outside You are standing outside Club Simpson, an imposing concrete building surrounded by railings. The building's doors have been left wide open, and you can see that the interior of the building has been ruined.

Thick snow covers the ground, with footprints entering from the north-east, west and south-west, and leaving to the north-east, east, west and north-west. A collapsed snowbank shows where someone has fallen from the building.

Somebody has spraypainted Property of Clubbed to Death. onto a wall.


You are inside Club Simpson, in the near-darkness of the main dancefloor. The building has fallen into ruin, and with the lights out, you can hardly see anything. The doors to the street have been left wide open.

--Zex Suik 01:14, 16 February 2012 (UTC)

VHB, powered - 12:00, 18 May 2008 (EDST)