PEZ United
| PEZ United | |
| |
| Abbreviation: | PEZ U. |
| Group Numbers: | 9 Members |
| Leadership: | KamikazeRomantic |
| Goals: | Help Defend S. Blythville, expand to other subs, drink Boxed Wine, have a good time. |
| Recruitment Policy: | Ask. |
| Contact: | We'll call you |
Started in October (this being LAST October, that is, the one in 2006, before the current one, which would be 2007...possibly. [Note to Editor: update as necessary, check fact checking the facts based on the timeline for figuring out our timeline)), PEZ United (People Executing Zombies) is a new (Editor's Note: Now currently OLD) group of survivors in Blythville (North and South).
Their HQ is The Honeyfield Motel, in Northern South Blythville (yeah, that makes sense-ish). Most Guests are welcome, check the list posted at The empty main office, . those who are black listed are asked to not take any room keys from the aforementioned unguarded main office (we really should get somebody on that...)
Members are advised that the Official Revive Point for PEZ United is Slocombe Street, just NW of The HoneyField. For Private Members Only, Civs should report to Gee Avenue, still. We try to pick help with the revives there too, when our Territory is NOT IN THE FUCKING RED!....Errr...Orange...I guess we are getting some work done...not used to saying that....
P.E.Z....W.T.F?
Yeah We Know. But It's a Long Loved, Cherished Name Embedded with Soccer Heritage...and it's PEZ!
We Are the only group on UrbanDead to be officially Sponsored by BRAZEN Paper Towels! Brazen paper Towels - it's No Pansy!
We are followers of The Zombie Survival Guide (World War Z = Urban Dead from Malton?) and YDKJ Products.
Currently researching such guides as: How to Survive a Robot Invasion, How to Survive a Horror Movie & A field Guide to the Apocalypse (by Meghann Marco, which was capable of making you feel more secure, yet even more scared...great combo). You don't know with that Kevan, the next update could be HUGE!
A Tale of Triumph, Adversity, But Mainly Just Boredom and Laziness
The Bio of the Group, members, and the characters they play as, coming soon, next time I run out of AP and have nothing better to do with my time.
News/Updates
March 12th, 2009: Well, what a difference a year makes....or a year and a 1/4. Christ. everything always goes to hell when you take your eyes off of it. What is that phrase, a watched pot never spoils? I don't know any people that stare at Plants that much to know if that's true or not, but what IS TRUE is that we are BACK. And back in a big way...ish. It would look big to some people, probably very small people. Really we don't have a lot of members here, though With [Sandrak] & [flatliner] going above and beyond tenants of The Honeyfield Motel, they are figureheads of this group as much as anyone. Together we're going to take south blythville down a peg!...errr...in a good sense. Like, anti-zombie sense. Or just have a good time, I don't know, fuck it, who's got the hot tub and the jukebox going?
Dec. 1st: Well, beyond looking through The Honeyfield looking for the old Christmas Decorations (which you'd think would be easy considering the building is pretty much just wood chips & garbage, with all the important stuff stacked on the barricade...which includes all the guns...though that probably doesn't help the 'cades all too much...), nothing has been going on. The place is secure, the zombies are staked out neatly on the road... We've been trying to form our own indoor Cricket League...which is hard when you know nothing of cricket... and those little undead bastards keep getting into the walls...
- shrug
Nov. 27th: Well, it's been about 2 weeks since our 1 year anniversery of taking over [The Honeyfield Motel]. I AM STILL BUZZED. I swear guys...I think those 3 Wal Mart Cosmopolitans hit me really hard. I Keep seeing double when I go out to kill Zombies... though the zombies are usually wearing different clothes... so maybe there are just that many more zombies...
Then again, probably not because The 2nd Big Bash totally wimped out! I don't know, Our HQ Never got broken into, thanks to the Loyalty of most members and some nice guests (Who were all allowed to leave with as many plastic card keys that they could shove down their pants). The mall was barely down long. Nice try Zombies, you give about as much effort as Democrats! Whoops...the Colbert in me came out...
Well, if you Zombahs ever get the balls to come back...we'll be waiting.
Literally. right now, there's not much to do. Few Zombies, and frankly the team has just been stocking up, helping out to clean up the area, and certain members have spread out more PEZ Propaganda. Though there has been some amusing messages sprayed around as well...
Well, keep fightin the good fight...and by good fight I mean, keep kicking rotting undead corpses in the head until they die.
- Cheers
Nov. 14th: Our Pez heroes are going about the motions in preparation for the next big zombie hit. Mike and Jonny are making runs down to the Mudford PD in an attempt to make it lutable. Also to just barricade it and leave it empty, so that the moronic zomboes waste their precious AP. Leaving them asleep in the streets and ripe for the shotgunning. Dieter has stocked up on a solid handful of revivification syringes. Ready for team revives AND combat revives. Its time to bolster the human resistance. A good amount of PEZ members have decided not to abandon the Honeyfield and will go down with the ship if need be. Boys, we salute you. And good luck.
Nov. 11th: Today is November 11th, tomorrow shall be the 12th, don't forget to turn your calendars back one month.
- Note to Self - Add new update here.*
Way to get 2,041 page hits guys!
I'm going to go lie back down...it's been 4 days since our anniversary of The Honeyfield Take Over...I'm still feeling hung over...and where are my pants?
And I'm still bleading...I keep using these "Healing Bullets" The Preacher gave me (well, he seemed like a preacher, he was in an alley wearing a large overcoat and no pants...sounds like most preachers these days...)...You know, know matter how many of them I use, I don't feel any better...
Nov. 7th: The Rout brothers and good ol' Jonny Rockets completed their Mudford Plaza Police department quest. All zombies inhabiting the area were succesfully executed and barricades were raised. Along the way, several civilians were saved while they were slumbering in the streets. It's a zombie invasion people, sleeping in the streets was dangerous enough when it was we only had to worry about humans. Don't be a complete moron, sleep indoors (This was a PSA, Pez Service Anouncement).
Now with an ammo supply location, the boys are going to start to load up for the PEZ United response to the Big Bash. Dec. 12th is coming. What does that mean? OH YES. Our 2nd instalment of that yearly romp through the streets, looking for walking carcass to rekill. ZOMBIE SLAUGHTER DAY. Zo Zombies, put your baby corpses away, they will not be spared. And if you pray to God for help, which we suggest you do, ask for him in person. Jesus wont do. This is no place for kids.
After reloading has been completed, which could take a while for some members.. cough cough Mike cough. The contingent plans to regroup at the Honeyfield, drink some wine, be badasses, then go to the mall for some shopping. To shop for carnage and undead destruction. And just to make sure everything is going well down in that part of the world. Its not easy policing the city on our own..
Mike also had thoughts of creating a unified Blythville defense force. Zombies will be a lot harder pressed to face us, if we worked in unison instead of random survivors trying to get by. But this vein will be explored more thoroughly in the days to come. We will keep you posted true believers!
Nov. 5th: Ok, so I said the stats would be starting up again...Well...they will...soonish...I just kina got sidetracked, and since I’ve been the only one editing this thing for a while (Carver?)...It’s gotten kicked to the dust...We will get stats back up. I just got to set a date for everyone to actually start counting kills! Tomorrow?
...ahhh damn I have plans that day...
Wednesday too...That’s the 1 year Aniversery of Our Take Over of The Honeyfield, a righteous time indeed. Plenty of booze to be served that day. The drunk stories we shall tell...and cause...Party for everyone!
So that day is booked....
I’m sure we’ll get around to it...
Probably.
Maybe.
I don’t know...
But everything’s been going well. One of our members got revived 3 minutes after getting to an RP. Unfortunately, Our team didn’t record who that person was...but many thanks go out to him. Speaking of which, Ballack, leader of our PEZ bravo team in Chanclewood would like the directly thank Allison Wolf and those of the Malton Emergency Medical Service...Unit... And by Thanking directly...I mean he told me how you guys healed him a bunch of times during his sprees up there... I’m curious how come he gets hurt So Much...but I guess it is not my problem, if Mr. Ballack is fine, well and Shiving...well, all’s good with me.
...We Need you Ballack. Don’t die on us! Your leadership up there seems...kamikaze. You are probably more capable of that name than I. But I guess that’s why you’re cool like that. And you are bringing up our rookies pretty well...if only they’d play more. I’m looking at YOU (You being the player I’m referring to).
I know I should say something due to it being the November 5th...but god damn I hate V for Vendetta...fuck what an awful movie...No zombies, shotguns to the face...Pass.
So Keep Surviving and Killing! We will discuss the Party of November 7th soon...probably November 7th And/Or 8th.
And Allison Wolf & your people, feel free to stay in any of our find Motel Establishments, we will try to keep you safe. Feel free to take a Wine Box or 2! And all the Soap you can scrub with...but not that much. Be warned of any lotion found in our bathrooms that cause the bathtub to become bubbly...due to our importing of bath products from Chernobyl. Not only is it poisonous, but many of the aforementioned bubbles are actual living organisms...
...And it smells like garbage.
Anyways, have fun!
Oct. 30th: South Blythville is now Orange. WE DID IT!!! Well, not without, well, everyone's help... And North Blythville did go into the yellow...it's like a god damn scale, Move action in one zone, lose force in the other...You know, looks like getting hit in the face 63 times by a seesaw as a kid is finally paying off....
Congrats I suppose. and this page now has over 1660 hits! That is way too much for a page like this....
Considering tomorrow is Halloween, all members are advised to find safe shelter to survive the whole day. Watch for Zombie trick-or-treaters! Those bastards don't want the candy!
...and how can you not want candy?...They truly are pure Evil.
of Note, that all guests at any of our fine Motels are free to take a free $20 PEZ United Pez Dispenser. Warning: Despite look, PEZ United Pez Dispensers do not dispense Awesomeness, kick-ass, shivs or actual PEZ United members, unless by "Awesomeness, kick-ass, shivs or actual PEZ United members".....you mean candy....and by Candy, you mean Anthrax & wine. But don't worry, it may not dispense "Awesomeness, kick-ass, shivs or actual PEZ United members" BUT It is Made BY PEZ United Members, USING pure 100% Colombian "Awesomeness & Kick-ass".
...and may also be used as a Shiv.
Oct. 25th: Well, life is starting to come back to us. We need some FAKs, but we'll be fine. Thanks to those who revived us at Shallet Crescent.
Does anyone realize it's past our 1 year Anniversary? Double-Fucking-Score. If only there was some wine around.
We're getting some new recruits too. I can't wait to train them up. PEZ is coming back big. Watch the Fuck out Zombahs! Your heads shall be busted in soon. And not with the sharp side. We're going to Blunt the fuck out of you.
Oct. 24th: Ouch. Just...ouch. Mrh? Some of us are alright, we will rebuild. let us all bow our heads for the Honeyfield...all that wine...not getting drunk...I tried to save it....I tried....I saved as much as I could. AP? to hell with the barricades! Might not have been the wisest choice....
Oct. 21st: Well, PEZ united is far from full strength, and the going has been tough.
Anyways, there are 5 of us here left, and we will try and help protect this city from going into an even darker shade of red (Purple?)....or at least get drunk enough off Wine to forget all this shit that's been going down. First plan is to just protect the area around The Honeyfield, which means the PD, FD & Hospi...D...beside us. The mall for now is almost a lost cause, with such a small strike force. But we are willing to collaborate with all Survivor groups. We're all wine drinkers here...right?
So Let's get on it! Get those who form The 2nd Big Bash...and...well...you know...bash'em.
FYI: Over 1,500 Hits to this Page! Good Job Everybody, even when we weren't here you just couldn't stop!
And the Zombie kill count comes back after the Nightfall of Halloween.
I do have another account up in Chancelwood, starting a small PEZ united tactical Squardron up at The Cheatle Hotel. Our Hotel home away from Home.
Speaking of such, Our new Hotel location in North Blythville is The Kelland Motel. Just incase the Honeyfield goes up in Zombie-inspired Flames....We all know how flammable that Wal-Mart Wine is.....
Oct. 10th: We return! And by We, I mean... well 5 people. maybe more, we shall see.
Jan. 7th (4:46am): PEZ hit the 100 zombie kill mark. Karver87 continues to fight off the zombie threat, and drink the crap ass wine.
Dec. 25th: Mike and Jonny lower the PEZ United flag to half mast and ask all standing members to support and remember our fallen allies. Hopefully we will see you soon men; there is a way back for you.
Dec. 13th (4:24pm): UPDATE At Appox. 12:30am Our place was slightly attacked. There was one Zombie, who took a bite out of everybody...apparently was just taking a sample. The Zombie went by the profile name BlackPussy...which is appropriate...well, not the black part. Sandradk, a PEZ United Hero, went and smashed it's face in. FAKs will be arriving for the unimportant members tomorrow. Also, a person by the name of Deathlicious (Nimpho?). While Sandra fought off the zombie scum and washed the blood off herself, This Deathlicious went into her room and destroyed our Genny! What was the purpose we ask? In-Game-Wise, was there any real reason to destroy it? Lose our all important search rate for Wine...wtf? The loss of the all important jukebox and hottub is starting to rot the mines of the PEZ United, more so than the Wal-Mart Wine usually does. Revenge will be sweet.
Dec. 13th (11:24am): It's morning, and PEZ United is pretty out of it. after the massive party that was ZSD (though pronounced Zesty), most of the members are incapacitated. Of note:
KamikazeRomantic (the leader), was thrown off the top floor of The HoneyField, after saying that he was a "Golden God" (he had just been watching Almost Famous), and that he could make it into the pool from there. THe other members, who knew that the pool was 200 ft away, indoors, AND on the OTHER side of the Motel, just pushed him off. He was ok, aside from the weather vane that punctured his flesh. They also put all his weapons in the Newspaper box, thus forcing him to pay 75 cents to get them back.
After a sugar/wine infused Rage-fest killed his way to level 20, coincidentally on his 20th birthday.
Karver87 well, well we really aren't allowed to say what happened to him, but lets just say, he's going to be needing a LOT of BRAZEN! The ***************** involved in the incident will probably need some as well.
Rufus22, undeserving of BRAZEN, because he used the garden shed to soften his fall. Claiming he could do better, he jumped and landed all the way onto an old Oldsmobile. His neck will never be the same...He needed to be revived by MixMastaCombo. MixMastaCombo then tried to revive a rock.
LoneGunmanV1, seeing this, called Rufus22 a pussy, because he used a car to soften his fall. Jumping, he was the one who finally made it to the ground...He's still there.
Flatliner, seeing this, went inside. He stole the Generator to hook it up to the Jukebox he has in SaD (Shotguns At Dawn) room. Claiming he was like 'a Rhinestone-cowboy' He proceeded to try and fit himself into the minibar.
Sandradk, after seeing Flatliner with his head in the Minibar, made sure he was breathing...and then stole the Generator for herself. In her room, with Pie and candles, she hooked the Genny to the hottub in her room, she never left. Unfortunately, she couldn't stop singing "Like A Rhinestone Cowboy"...Attempts to think of better music were unsuccessful.
Oh, and Mr Tab got really drunk.
What else? Well, Rufus22 really did need a revive, thus destroying our no member revives streak...We're 1 kill away from 80, and we've received 700 hits, and this is the longest update so far.
Dec. 12th: declares today: Official Zombie Slaughter Day. Sponsored by Brazen and PEZ. Killed a zombie and made a mess? Reach for Brazen! Killed a zombie and worked up an appetitte for little rectangular candies? Have some PEZ! Now go out and kill, kill, kill. Anything you see! If you see you ex-girlfriend, shiv her in the eye! If you see your zombie ex-girlfriends, shiv her even more! Now go and celebrate this, the most cherished of holidays. ZOMBIE SLAUGHTER DAY!
This just In..., having relationship problems/issues?...could it just be because of his Birthday today? More reports later... Also, 670 Hits now, we are really getting some attention!
Dec. 11th: Well, North Blythville is Green! We DID IT!! WOOOOO! Nice work guys, and girls *cough*Sandradk*cough*. It took us a month and a half after we arrived, but it's happened. Of course, we didn't do it alone, not even close. TZH, Olney, Drifters, they did a lot, but we shot enough Zombies to cover our part. Tonight we Party! *Cues Fall Out Boys "This ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race"* Everyone, we shall get our boxed wine and rejoice, for today is truly a day to celebrate! Shivs for all! Actually we need those... Soap for all! Actually, we need that too....Gravel for all! $2/each.
What's next? Well, nothing yet. This place just turned green, we can't let our guard down or get cocky...Well, we were already cocky...But this ain't over, now we are right beside a 'Very Dangerous' Area, and they'll be wanting to come down and get us. So for now, we reload, regroup and relax for a little. Wait for them to come. If they don't, we expand further. Probably Greentown or Lockettside, turn the whole south green! Merry Fucking Christmas you Zombie Bastards!
What else? Well, we passed 600 profile views, which ain't bad. Mr Tab got his first kill, which considering he chose to start as a scout, is amazing. Known for stabbing/Shiv-ing a guy a couple of times then fleeing, finally he has a whole kill to his name, and one well deserved. I have also decided to really describe the HoneyField Motel, namely, to actually assign my members rooms, and to get a map of the building, mainly for entertainment purposes only. This will be coming soon, once more time becomes available.
Dec. 10th: Well 1 day goes by, 75 more hits to this Wiki! Mmmmm...can you feel that?...*inhales*...that...that, is Popularity...*exhales*...and it's fucking awesome. Guess we're too damn good/funny or everyone else is really fucking bored....I guess they don't have anything better to do, god knows killing zombies and saving Malton gets fucking old...fast....just kidding, when is splitting a zombies head open not fun?
Dec. 9th: Added The Allies page, because there was really nothing else to do, since I Couldn't Say that we have killed 10 more Zombies...because we haven't! Come on people, get moving, there's only half a day left and we're 2 kills short...don't make me stop the Wiki! I'll turn this Wiki around so fast! I'm disappointed...really I am...Sure, some of you need ammo, well you have determination and rive, use that as Fucking Ammo!...Sure it may not kill as fast...or at all...but it's the thought that counts, and you better be thinking about total Zombie Destruction! Make me Edit this entry to say we scored another 10 kills...I'll wait here while you do it *Fold Arms*
Well, since no one seems to be doing anything, how are we going to stay funded? The only reason we've survived thus far is by pick-pocketing zombies and giving their organs to the hospitals, saying that they're from human corpses (well, they are, just...you know...undead, rotting, human corpses...) But without that, how will we survive? Our Motel? Ha! With all the Wine we give/drink, I don't think we ever collect any money anyways, we just threaten to Shiv people. Stabing, a very good way to attract repeat business!
I've decided to resort to advertising. See how bad our situation is? But speaking of bad situations, did you know that in Conneticut, there are towns that have lights on only 1 side of the street? Places, where they only get their asphalt paved every COUPLE of YEARS! Their tap water? Not Imported! Well, we here at NAMBLA (North American Members for the Bettering of Local Areas), we want to change all that...for only 924 cents a day, the price of a cheap coffee maker, you can help change to town. You drink coffee don't you? Well why can't you give it up you self-absorbed prick? And after the additional $12.24/day for taxes and to pay our bills, that's a little over $400/month. Please, this town use to be supported by paper towel factories (including our much beloved BRAZEN! brand) and Cracker Factories, but the Cracker Factories have dissolved. Literally, they always used TOO much Salt. And now, we turn to you, so please, call 1-800-4-NAMBLA, today. Cheap Mexicans and Teens Desperate for Money Are Standing By (literally too, we don't give them chairs)...
...And in other news, It's been 2 whole weeks since we put this Wiki up. Woo 2 Weeks! And already 500 Hits! Thanks Everybody! ...Phew...we made it to 60 kills. Sure it happened at 1:30am...in LA it would still be Dec. 9th...Way to go Team!...ya bunch of slackers.
Dec. 7th: We have passed 50 ZOMBIE KILLS Since Nov. 26th (12 days ago). As per the growing trend, 11 more zombies have been killed in 2 days. These kills are dedicated to the brave zombies who stood by and let us put hot lead right through the chest and face, Thanks Zombahs! We light a garbage fire in your name...and also to cook us some dinner, since we're all hungry...am I right guys? Where the fuck is the food in this place? Can 10 men live on Wine alone? Also of note, our guest Sandradk, despite being a woman in a motel full of 10 desperate Zombie killers full of boxed wine, no incidents occured. Thanks Sandradk, hope you enjoyed the stay.
Dec. 5th:(Con't) In a hung over (well, as hung over as you can get on boxed Wal-Mart Wine, it's more of a dizzy 'I've been poisioned and am about to die' type) stuppor, Dieter looked slightly like a zombie. And Jonny Rockets, the "stupid bitch" (according to Leeroy), attacked him with his shiv. After much screaming and yelling, everything calmed down and things went back to normal. Also, the entire group shared a group hug....except Dieter, nobody wanted to touch him, he was a little too bloody...eww...
Dec. 5th: What the Fuck guys...40 Zombie kills! We're killing 10 zombies every 2 days...lets keep it that way! Teach those fucking Zombies to step on our turf. Zombies should heed our past warnings. Actually, we need the XP, so stay the fuck here! Hands where I can see them...or stubs...whatever that thing is just raise it....so we can drop you...though not literally, we don't really want to touch any of you...
Dec. 4th: To celebrate the recent sucess of PEZ United, Dieter drank too many bottles of wine and was invigorated.
Dec. 3rd: Business is picking up. 2 Days and 10 Zombie Kills later, the Total has reached 30! Good Job with the ass-handings guys!
Dec. 1st: Christmas is coming, in celebration the team achieved a total of 20 zombie kills since the 26th of November.
Nov. 29th: Revives are complete, supplies have been searched for and found. Zombies have been warned, we're going to fucking shiv you in the goddamn neck...and if you don't have a neck anymore...the spine...maybe in the ribs "Steve Irwin Style"! There will be much joy, shared over boxed Wine.
Nov. 28th: NEWS/UPDATE/NEWS: Updates/News/Updates Section now in the stylish 'descending dates' (New News Is first/new) Format.
Nov. 26th: The last 2 members from Malton approach the Honeyfield Motel, Zombified. Their revives will wait until those injured in the onslaught have recovered. The desire for revenge grows.
Nov. 25th: The PEZ Base of command has been attacked, brutally injuring 4 of it's members. No deaths from the inital attack, though is mauled after patroling the surrounding area. Work begins on repairs and revenge. , injured and limping kills 4 zombies in retribution, the Adrenaline from the loss of blood flowing through him. "Boxed Wine Heals all Wounds".
Nov. 24th: The PEZ United war chant "Pat-Squi-Ttow-Ximelez" is created through much drunken rambling from too much boxed wine, while meaning gibberish, it is cherished and shall strike fear in those who oppose the PEZ people.
Nov. 23rd: Flag is created based on the pixeled version from Winning Eleven (Sans Rifle & Sickle), NOTE: PEZ United does not in any way follow the beliefs of the Communist party...It merely likes the flag of the Soviet Union.
Nov. 16th: Xp grows, Members become stronger, cockier.
Nov. 10th: Key plan is to build up Xp, the group overall is too weak to really do damage, much less try and protect the suburb.
Nov. 8th: More members are introduced to UrbanDead, their characters start coming from the map. Some as far as yagoton.
Nov. 7th: The Honeyfield Motel is found empty, extremely barricaded, and full of wine (boxed...*sigh*)...Morale is increased until the discovery of the boxed wine. Decision to party and get drunk is declined, due to the amount of embarrassment that comes with drinking boxed wine. The group is unfamilliar with the brand "Wal-Mart"...believed to be French.
Nov. 6th: After a few members had acquired Free Running, a plan is set out to find a new base, somewhere close to the Mall, and other important buildings.
Nov. 3rd: Group decides PEZ United as group name after their favorite soccer team (in Winning Eleven). The People Executing Zombies part was not initially part of the soccer team recruitement policy.
Oct. 31st: Halloween fog causes little trouble for the group, Xp gain is low, as well as candy intake. PEZ is not readily available...*sigh*...
Oct. 27th: After the death of two of the founding members in Holy's Church, base is moved to Gotch PD.
Oct. 25th: A Decision is made between the group members to meet in Blythville, the closest green/safe square in malton, in relation to most of the characters. Meeting point is St. Holy's Church.
Oct. 22nd: Group is introduced to UrbanDead through member Mike.
Members
KamikazeRomantic: The Leader. Just a man with the plan and some fighting skills as well. Unfortunately, his accound has been disabled. He still leads, but through his protege, KamikazeQuiksilver. May god have mercy on him.
KamikazeQuiksilver: The Rebirth of Kamikaze. Or was it long-forgotten blood brother? Bizzaro World KamikazeRomantic? Well, it doesn't matter. Because he's got a fury the likes of which Mr. Romantic never had. His passion causes his axe swings to create blood-fused masterpieces on the ground. Thanks for the paint Zombies.
Mike: The man who started it all, introduced the rest to UrbanDead.com. The weapons expert, was the first to purchase all the weapon skills (sans Knife...honestly, who the hell needs the knife? [EDITOR's NOTE: Mike does not hate the Shiv. The Shiv is Awesome. IN Fact he DOES Have the Shiv Skill.]). Tries to convince the others the power behind the gun.
Dieter Routliffe: Mike's immature brother. Focuses on the axe, because 'Blades don't need reloading'. Was introducted into the group because of his possesion of the Zombie Survival Guide...and we were that desperate for new members. Is starting to prove his worth.
Karver 87: We don't talk about him much. Is a little disconnected from the group. Doesn't care for zombie waiting to be revived, if it can't put together words in a meaningful manner, its brains will be carved out. Doesn't believe in "An eye for an Eye" but "Two eyes for an eye". He kept PEZ United alive the longest. He made sure fear was still out there. A True Hero...despite the madness.
Ballack: The leader of PEZ United Bravo (or PeZub...actually, PEZ united is just fine...). That's right, It's Michael Ballack. That Shiv-loving Mother Fucker we've loved & Worshipped for so long, now leading our own Renegade Squadron up in ChancelWood! We wish he was closer to our home, but some one that Balls-to-the-Walls needs to go his own way. So we've given him 2 rookies as back-up. Try to Keep Up Boys.
MrShiv: A "pet" project from one of the jokesters (WHO SHOULD BE TRYING TO SAVE BLYTHVILLE INSTEAD). He's leading our Zombie devision, ZEP United (Zombies Executing People) in JensenTown. A Crazed psycopath, he is trying to be a 1-man...err...zombie army. Good luck with that, don't get near us...you're dripping...it's gross. We're not sending him any members...why would we betray our Surivior brethren? We won't! have fun killing our partners...try to get the strong ones, it makes us look better.
The other members, while equally important, are less important. Speaking of Which...
Former Members: These are the guys we lost to the great disable-ment of late 2006. These guys wre working together, but the IP address killed them. Their horror stories are further below. We miss these guys.
Bitchy Q: Another powerhouse fighter, nothing too special, just a guy with an Axe. His name is from...well...it's a long story, one not worth discussing, though maybe after a couple boxes of wine. Has started practice with his pistol...likes it. Is trying to increase his Zombie kill Tally.
MixMastaCombo: The group's main healer, the best scientist, worst fighter. Usually has enough work on his hands because of the carelessness of other members. Dreams of the day he'll have more than a 10% chance to hit things.
KamikazeRomantic's Address to the People of Malton
Hello, this is Kamikaze Romantic, the former Leader of PEZ United. Former, because Kevan killed a bunch of the PEZ accounts, since most of us use the same IP address. It’s because we play at Concordia University, where most of us live. I know, we could fight it, but what proof to we have? Frankly, with the Christmas break, not much of the group really cared, and this is just another nail in the coffin for them. Me? Well, I was devoted to this game, and loved it so. But with only a few players left, I don’t feel as interested either. I spent so much time, and now it seems almost a waste. Still, I want to come back, maybe this a sign I love this game too much... Figures, finally a game where a bunch of my friends could play, without needing to have a good computer, without having to pay cash, hell they only needed to play for about 10 minutes a day (and even that was hard for some of them). Sure, it could be hard on them, since only 3 of us could really play a day, and I usually went first at 9am, while the others slept…. Still, more important than anything was the fact that the game was just FUN. Who doesn’t like killing zombies? Or running a run-down Motel filled with Wine? What about jumping off the building?
It was a good time. I know we didn’t really get to know anybody, but I guess it’s too late for that. Case you were wondering, I, KamikazeRomantic, am a 19 year old honors student, and a wannabe writer…as you may have been able to tell from our Wiki. Yeah I wrote most of it, and it was a hell of a time, rivaling that of actually playing UrbanDead. If anything, this game at least proved my desire to become a writer.
Am I angry? Well, yeah, a bit, but it was bound to happen. I just wish we could have had a longer run. We were here for 53 days, had PEZ United and The HoneyField Motel for only 37. We got over 100 kills, at least though we only started counting Nov.26th, so there was probably about 150 if we’re lucky…and Fuck were we lucky. The Wiki was up since the 26th of November. We got 800 hits, though 200 were from members, I edited it 120+ times. I was going to edit myself out of the Wiki, pretend I never happened, but it’s too hard. Too much effort has gone into it, I can’t just disappear.
I want to thank Sandra & Flatliner, who both were just trying to have a good time with us. They were certainly into it as much as I was and they were great. I’m sorry I had to leave you two, I never wanted to, but I guess you’ll have to find some other people to party with. There was also Joshua Mlodizanowski, who Rufus22 had been talking to for a long time. I hope his new found group does well. Should PEZ United disband, I hope that the rest of you can continue to run The HoneyField, enjoying it’s boxed Wal-Mart Wine, and plethora of Shivs. She’s been a good home. She STILL is. If I could, I’d raise the PEZ Flag on the Motel Flag Pole forever. *Salutes The Smoking Squirrels*
But what Next? Well, there’s still 5 of my friends in Urban Dead. Will they continue, I don’t know, it’s a little doubtful but my luck goes out to them. Is this the end for PEZ United, well maybe, but our short run shall be remembered as an amusing group who loved to party. And Who knows, PEZ United may one day return……
And me? Maybe I’ll come back, depends on what life has in the cards. Right now, I have 5 weeks sans (Without) work, sans school, so I guess I’ll enjoy them. What will I do…I don’t know, maybe I’ll go outside…. So Again, I raise my Wal-Mart Boxed Wine with my right hand, my Shiv with my left, and toast to you. Those who read, or helped, or simply stood your zombified body up so we could shoot you in the face….it was you guys that made this game fun….that, and the whole shooting people in the face part….Thanks Harmanz! Thanks Zombahs! I wish you all my luck, and hope you keep yourselves well, and our city safe. The members of PEZ United leave the rest to you.
- Cheers*
Man, That’s fucking terrible wine…..ttow.
Oh…but what about the characters huh? I guess you’re right; we can’t just leave them to disappear completely…that doesn’t make much sense. Well, with Bitchy Q(my brother *shudder*, he never wanted me to say that…oh well) Rufus22’s help, here you go:
Mr Tab, The scout of the group, who claimed to be from the family who created Tab Soda, although he worked for the Army, We could only assume that he wasn’t really rich. Actually, we were wrong, he was part of the TAB soda family. To prove that he was part owner of a company who makes a soda so vile it makes you want to blow your brains out, he drank some. Well, he didn’t kill himself, but the taste was so horrible that it rotten his brain much more than the skill Brain Rot ever could. After foaming at the mouth, and starting to leak blood from…well…everywhere….the rest of the group threw him into the basement of the HoneyField, where he remains, as a retarded Zombie….a Tabbie. It’s not so bad, we just feed him and he’s stays calm. At least now he doesn’t talk so god damn much.
LoneGunmanV1, a utility player, who did a little bit of everything…including Cocaine. Mixed with the Wal-Mart Wine, the concoction made him invincible….or so he thought. Realizing the Lone part of his name, decided to break from the group. Saying his goodbyes, he walked all the way to the border, with a backpack that included enough wine, coke, clips & Dieter’s Zombie Survival Guide. At the border, he took out an M4, and did his best Tony Montana impression. Soldiers who stood in the way were gunned down, Land Mines too. The fences and barbed wire was passed using his Wire cutters (Finally coming in handy!). The napalm trenches were easily crossed using the will of god and the crucifix. He had made it to safety, and after commandeering an army jeep, drove to Ogunquit Maine, (a favorite vacation/party spot for most of the players). He watched the tides come in and out nightly, thinking about his friends back in Malton, wishing they were ok. He gave up fighting, but he was still prepared, should the Malton Virus ever break out further…
Rufus22, who had jumped off The HoneyField and landed onto a parked 1970s Oldsmobile, never recovered. Despite the revive from MixMastaCombo, he really couldn’t think straight anymore. He became paranoid, trusting nobody but his shotgun and Ax…Well, one night, his Shotgun turned on him too. The members of PEZ were too late to help him. The blood was everywhere, and for that, they never opened room 22 again. It was renamed the Rufus Room in memorial. The service was nice, everyone was in their best attire, which wasn’t that great, given the limited amount of choices left in Malton. The tears were plentiful, well, for most people, Leeroy still considered him a jerk, but was at least quasi-respectful. You see Rufus, who was in charge of supplies, never gave Leeroy any extra towels, which was hard on Leeroy, though no one’s ever asked why. Leeroy remained angry the entire time, yet now he tried to make amends. He was determined to apologize to Rufus, even if his head was in a million pieces on the wall. Leeroy went inside, but never apologized to Rufus. It turns out, he was gone, the window broken, and the room empty of all personal items. There was blood on the wall…a lot of it… a note, and some of LoneGunman’s Coke. It contained 4022 characters, but was just a mess of random numbers and letters. The group still hasn’t figured it out, but continue to try to find out what really happened to their poor psychotic and paranoid friend.
MixMastaCombo, distraught by Rufus22’s actions, was the only one that vowed to find him. He felt responsible for what happened to Rufus, because it was his revive that woke him up. Sure, it’s unlikely that it had anything to do with MMC’s actions, but he refused to listen. He was the healer of the group, it was his sole purpose, yet he failed to do right. Ashamed, he wore a paper bag over his head, which was pretty weird, given his tendency to wear a cowboy hat. He prepared to leave as well, talking as many syringes as he possibly could. No weapons, aside from a Pistol with 2 shots left, which was bad planning, to say the least. Given his only 30% chance to hit with a pistol, I guess there really wasn’t much he could do. He left, promising that he’d find Rufus. The first nights weren’t so bad, he knew how to free run, so he could usually be seen front flipping from building to building. Still going through the core of Malton, things got rougher. SO many zombies, everywhere that it was hard for him to do anything. He needed to be with the zombies, to examine them in the hopes of finding the one zombie that looked like Rufus. He was bitten multiple times, becoming infected. Diseased, tired and bleeding, he knew he had not much longer to live. But he still had not finished what he wanted to do. So, in a showing of absolute genius, he jabbed a syringe into his neck, yet didn’t push the serum into his body. With a tangling needle out of his neck, he continued, until finally succumbing to his injuries. With his last breath, he forced himself to fall forwards, thus landing on the needle, the pressure of the body injecting the serum into his body. The next day, he woke up, completely fine, though surprised. Using this special technique, MMC was invincible, every time he fell, we would get back up. He realized the great power the zombies had, and had even wondered if that’s what Rufus had wanted. He’s never gotten help from anybody, since most of the time they just pass his corpse on the ground. No one’s realized the power by the self-inflicted syringe. Perhaps this is why he truly deserves the title of Mix MASTA Combo.
Bitchy Q was the last one to leave. He said that there was a purpose to why, but he didn’t know what it was yet. He knew that this team was dwindling, yet told me that I would be able to take care of things without him (I’m sure he lied), so he hoped he could help others. He was a self-described high-level caretaker, good at his job, though he pretty much just shot Zombies. He said his goodbyes to me, and me alone, wanting to leave the group in secrecy, feared that he might want to stay. Despite my offers of Wine, he still left, though a couple of boxes of wine went with him. Walked for what seemed like for ages, killing when he needed to, sleeping when he needed to. The journey ended in Shearbank, at a car park. There was a girl on the top of the car park, screaming like hell itself had opened. Bitchy ran up all 9 floors, but was too late. The screaming had stopped when they ripped her head in half (vertically). He had never seen such a disgusting site, despite all the death and destruction that he had already witnessed in Malton. This was by far the worst. Her body was laced in blood, her last remaining artifact, the crucifix, had not helped her. Enraged, he began to attack the +50 zombie mob furiously. Had been prepared, going through 20 shotgun rounds and over 12 pistol clips, yet they kept coming. He was beginning to lose his ammo reserves. Suddenly, he discovered the boxes of Wal-Mart wine left in the pack. He threw them at the mob, shooting them and watching as the resulting explosion leveled the field. (Now, let me make something clear, this explosion did not result because of the alcohol content in the wine, it would never create such a large explosive. What WOULD, is the cheap chemicals that Wal Mart substituted into the boxed wine in order to give it that fresh, right off the chemically sprayed vine taste. Yum!) But more started to come up the floors, and those that had fallen had already begun to rise again. Exits blocked, he took an Axe to the mob. It was apparent that he would not survive, but it only strengthen his resolve. Laughing maniacally, zombies were shred to bits, to the point that they could not rise. The axe broke, and Bitchy resorted to a lead pipe, which did virtually nothing. He decided to make a new way out, and jumped into one of the abandoned cars. He cut the cables and attempted to get it to start, but the old Corolla refused to start. Suddenly, a masked figure appeared in the front, lifting the hood and tinkering with the engine. A Zombie attempted to attack this figure, but it was dispatched by a huge punch to the chest. The zombie had been sent over the side, resulting from the force of the never before seen attack. Suddenly, the hood slammed down and the figure disappeared. Bitchy started the engine, amazed. He took the last 3-pack of Wal-Mart Wine (In handy, kid friendly juice box size), and proceeded to down one of them, thanking his former allies of PEZ. In a scene reminiscent of Thelma & Louise, but without the Lesbianism, he drove through the massive crowd. The car smashed through the wall…barely…and hit the ground head on. Bitchy should have been dead, but the wine had given him the 1 extra HP he needed to survive, although not enough to let his legs walk again. The engine had crushed half of him, and he was allowed to wait until the Zombies came to rip him open. And ‘came’ they did. Most just outright jumped off the roof, since they had free running anyways. Close to death, Bitchy took out what he had left, a Flare Gun, 2 juice size boxes of Wine and his PEZ Shiv. He took one of the boxes for himself, to keep his mind off the pain. With the knife he stabbed at the back seat, determined to find the gas tank. He was close, but not close enough as the zombies began to break into the car. In desperation, Bitchy through the last box of wine at back seat, as close to the gas tank as he could guess. He shot the box with the flare, at such range that it was a guaranteed hit. The blast could be felt as far away as Harvercroft.
I, KamikazeRomantic, had witnessed everything that had happened to PEZ United. It was painful, to say the least, depressing to see this happen to half my team with very little that I could do. Was I really a leader? How could I be, I didn’t stop any of it. I had considered taking the coward’s way out, but how would that help either. I would have been proving my own point. And seeing as how I was able to fall from a motel room on to a garden shed, IMPALE myself on a weather vane, only to get up and walk away, made me think that I probably wouldn’t be able to kill myself anyways. But I knew I couldn’t lead, I didn’t WANT to lead. I wished I could help out, do something, become a martyr for my team, in the hopes of getting them back, but it would never happen. I was forced out, by my own foolishness and the higher powers that be. So I stopped trying, this was somebody else’s fight now. I gave the keys to Mike, the PEZ Flag and officially told him to do the duties that I was not capable of doing. Then I proceeded to do something not normally done by me, nothing. I went to the HoneyField’s head Office building, kicked my feet up on the desk, and relaxed. I feed Tabbie from time-to-time, look outside while others fight off zombies, or party…or both. I listen to the jukebox, and for the first time really understand the meaning behind some of the songs. I’m actually writing the Malton memoirs, created mainly by stories from those who have passed by. So don’t be worried if you don’t see me, I’m just down there, drinking Wal-Mart Wine, and making sure everything’s ok. Who knows, I might even decide to take up arms again, but it depends on a lot of things, like learning to become a better leader. Though now, despite considering myself a failure, and never accomplishing what I wanted, I was free…I was happy.
So, there you have it, the story of half of PEZ United. I know, it’s not what you wanted or expected. You probably wanted us to party more, stick around longer, continue to be funny until our group took over…well…at least 3 suburbs. Alas, it was not to be. I’m sorry. Maybe we’ll return, but nothing can be sure. If you need me, contact me. Just remember us for the guys that made you laugh, the lighthearted drinkers & partiers of Malton…wand when we needed to, we kicked the shit out of zombies too. Thanks for everyone who helped or read this. It was a pleasure. Just keep strong, stay fighting, and remember the one group, which was for a time, PEZ United.
Again, Cheers. Kamikaze Romantic
….At least I can stop drinking this terrible excuse for wine.…
When the days all feel the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
And I will shine on, for everyone
JET – SHINE ON
Statistics
2007 Edition! (From October 31st - January 11th)
Zombie's Butchered: 133 [KamikazeQuiksilver: 69 Ballack: 21 Mike: 14 LordOfTab: 7 Jonny: 6 Leeroy: 5 Dieter: 3 PT: 3 OwlenNolan: 3 SuY: 2 (Way to go Rookies!)]
Zombies we have stabbed in the neck with a needle...and thus Revived: Dieter: 5 Ballack: 6
Member Revives: Mike, Dieter, Leeroy and Jonny were all revived by a good samaritan after the Big-Bash blew them apart.
Page Visits: 950+ hits in less than a Month!
Deaths/Revived: 7 (Tab...c'mon... great now we got to search North Bylthville for your hopefully upright corpse...alright, let's go...)
Stongest Member: Mike, lvl. 22...but he's KICKING ASS. Mrh? and he could be Level 37 if he used it on Zombah Stuff.
Top Scorer for PEZ United (WE9/PS2 - 6th Season): Tyler #22 - 54 goals, 33 games.
Biggest Joke: The Zombies trying to kill us. No Question here.
Deadliest member: Mike who has created his own personal martial art. A blend of pistols to the knees, shotties to the chest. And exa to the face.
Top Scorer for PEZ United (WE9/PS2): Tyler #22 - 32 goals, 18 games.
Zombiest Member/Victim: Jonny Rockets
Hoarder (Most Items): Mike, He's got enough ammo to put Sarah Connor to shame... but his corpse can't use them...Seriously, somebody go revived the guy...
Most Useful: Any and all who help us get revived and barricaded.
Most Flammable: None...(C'mon, It's been a god damn year, Add Fire to UrbanDead alrighty!!)
Most wanted new recruit: Scientist...badly, need more revivers.
Fists of Fury: RoboFish....wait...wrong game.
2006 Stats
Revives: 2-Dieter
Member Revives: 1, MixMastaCombo revived Rufus22
Zombies Slaughtered (started Nov.26th): 107 (25-Mike, 17-KamikazeRomantic, 14-Bitchy Q, 28-Karver87) 9-Dieter, 4-Leeroy, 3-Jonny, 3-Rufus22, 2-LoneGunmanV1, 2-Mr Tab(Way To Go Tabby!)
Strongest Member: Mike, lvl. 22.... Though Sandradk is lvl 27.
Biggest Joke: SexyIguana (seriously, even on our team...wtf?)
Deadliest member: Mike, 23 Kills.
Top Scorer for PEZ United (WE9/PS2): Tyler #22 - 32 goals, 18 games.
Zombiest Member/Victim: Jonny Rockets
Hoarder (Most Items):TIE: Mr. Tab (Max Inventory) & SexyIguana (yeah cause he doesn't do fuckall).
Most Useful: MixMastaCombo (Revives & Barricades...Thanks!)
Most Flammable: None...(C'mon, Add Fire to UrbanDead!)
Most wanted new recruit: Scientist...badly, need more revivers.
Fists of Fury: 7Knives...punch, punch.
Member who has brought the most sexy back: Karver87 [Editor's Note: Wtf?]
Current Projects
RETAKE BLYTHVILLE!
It's time we Reclaim this suburb, the fight is early and a quick attack may be enough to pull this place out of the Orange! We must attack Swift, Strong & .... a..... sternly? Kill those Zombahs!
Soon, they will come back, and we will be there to stop them. Otherwise, we Expand!
As Always, we are trying to gain as much xp as possible in order to become super-awesome!
And that way, there's less Zombies roaming about, thus making it easier for everybody in Blythville to do whatever the hell they want...provided it's legal...then again do laws really apply when there isn't anyone around to enforce them? Sure most of the people in this place are Cops or firefighters...but a lot of them are just trying to fend for themselves...but I digress...so no laws...Hmmm...I gotta find a few things now...*leaves the rest up to imagination/Stoned Visions*.
The HF HQ...or is that HQ HF...or HFOMGWTFBBQ?...Wait, it's HF HQ.
Our HQ, and specifically where everyone is, even if that will never be shown in-game. Why am I doing this? Bored. Shouldn't this be in The Honeyfield Motel page? Maybe, but only when it's done...besides, it's not important enough info to put there. And if it stays here it'll be hidden, awesome, and hopefully won't become a self-absorbed jerk.
An old shot of The Honeyfield Motel, before we gave it an over-haul.
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The Honeyfield Motel Last status update Dec 2020 |
The Lobby/Office for The Honeyfield Motel
The Kelland Motel, our home away from home in North Blythville.
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The Kelland Motel |
The Cheatle Motel, our home in Chancelwood. Free Runners Welcome. Those of PEZ United without it stay next door at:
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The Cheatle Motel EHB, dark. AndyMatthews (talk) 11:31, 19 October 2024 (UTC)
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The Bucknall Motel. Sorry the room is shitty. You forgot your club card...didn't you?
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The Bucknall Motel VHB, dark. AndyMatthews (talk) 02:58, 20 October 2024 (UTC)
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People Worth Mentioning in the Hopes of Getting a Free Gift Basket
These are the few, the proud, the Mari....oh, sorry I was just looking at this flyer for the Marines. Actually, these people are just those who've done something for us, or were simply nice enough to say Hi and spend some time with PEZ Gang. Apparently, Smoking Squrielles and Unlimited Quantities of Boxed Wal-Mart Wine make Everyone Us really appealing....doesn't make much sense does it? Anyways, these are the people who make our little hotel feel a little more like...well, a hotel...but one filled with some sort of love/friendly/abusive Family type relationship.
Sandradk - 'Honorary Member'. This player's been nice enough to get us fuel, kill zombies, and actually talked! A Great sport, even if she couldn't get those Zombie Steaks she wanted to get (Which Bitchy Q pointed out, is like Cannibalism, except we're choosing the grossest, tainted meat we can. Let's hear it for Grade J Quality Meat!). Sure, she didn't get any boxed wine when she looked for it (We keep it hidden in the Soda Machines....Damn It!), she did find 2 Shivs, which we believe is awesome...for you know our beliefs on Shivs (See below). For that, we will not charge her for stealing 2 of our shivs. As an Honorary Member she can get a revive at our point (Slocombe Street), our fighting assistance, and all the mini bottles of shampoo she can drink...which we hope is not that many...
Flatliner, and his crew Shotguns At Dawn - 'Welcomed Guests'. They've helped S. Blythville long before we got here, and were willing to say hello. While we haven't been able to party over Wine yet, we are sure that if they party as hard as they kill, well it'll be like Spring Break! (Word of Advice, Don't take your clothes off...certain people, who shall remain nameless, get very stab-y/Shiv-y/Knife-y, at the sight of nudity...and one always wanted to practice being a Rabbi before he got here...*crosses legs*...)
The guys over at Team Zombie Hardcore...well we haven't really talked yet *looks away shy-ly*, we have advised all our group members to add their PK list to our Contacts, in the hopes of finding these PK-ing bastards. Do we really need to meet TZH before we call them an Ally? Hell no, look how fucking Awesome and Hardcore they are...if we are half as hardcore, we would totally show it off. Here's to some work in the future guys!
And to you, the person reading this, for showing you have good taste and a sense of humour! Your welcome into our Motel for as long as you want, just don't steal the fucking towels! We have had to bolt the remote to the nightstand because of some of you, and even though the TVs don't work anymore, it's still the thought that counts...and teaches you the lesson.
Well, here's to you guys *holds up Boxed Wine* We, at PEZ United, salute you. All of those mentioned, shall get their sheets replaced every morning, and their floors swept. Unlike the others, where we close the door and make a bunch of "Sweep, Sweep" sounds...and you don't want to know what sheets the non-loved people get...*shudder*....Anyways, Cheers!
Recruitment Policy
Want to join the Awesome people above? Want to have your own Motel room to do whatever you want?...*Shudder*...Well, almost anything, no more Zombie Corpse fucking! E-Mail UrbanDead player Rufus22 at rufus00722@hotmail.com he will swift through all the occational listings and bring it up with the higher-ups.
The Other Policies
We believe in the Sacred Ground Policy, stating that Cemetaries shall be revive points.
We are against Random Revives, know who you revive before you do! Don't help PKers!
We are against the International Dibs Protocal proclaiming that the word Dibs shall be used to claim possesion...can't we just let the guns do the talking?
We believe in the Phish Protocal (People Hearing Interesting Songs and ... and ... Ham.) Listen to Canadian bands like STabilo & Tomi Swick. Yeah that's right, we're Canadian, you want to fucking fight about it? It's december, it's cold, and I could use something to warm me up...*gestures with hands*
We are very against the Let Zombies be Zombies act. If you want to stay a zombie, thats too bad. Humans want to stay human but Zombies kill them anyways. That's life.. err... the game. Any Zombie supporting the Let Zombies be Zombies act should not have the right to kill humans. Therefore redering the game "Humans and Zombies Living Together in Happiness Land." Which blows.. liek the wind.
We are against PKing/GKing/Rking...cause...yeah...Any people caught performing such acts in our motel shall be executed horribly & swiftly..ish...So do yourself a favor and jump out the window before we throw your stupid lifeless POS corpse from it.
We believe that all Knives should be renamed "shivs". Any of those who disaggress shall be shot...or shived, if there's enough AP.
We Support the Sting Ray's right to carry Shivs.
Random Stuff
We will Shiv you like Steve Irwin. (Note to Steve: You should have punctured through his ribcage first, with your barb/shiv...puncture or be punctured Stevy.)
PHear the Call "Pat-Squi-Tttow-Ximelex" For that is the "porc"lamentation/pro-clam-tion/proclamation that your death is near....
We Love you Steve...you warned us all about the dangers of stupid Sting Rays
You know who likes the Wii? Terrorists...and Communists. Do you love our Country? Remember WiiTard or WiiJects shall be shived on sight.
Steve Irwin liked the Wii, and look what happened to him. Do you want to wind up bleeding to death in Salt Water?
We believe in being unbiased to all consoles, but, just like are members, while they are all equally important, some, are less important.
PEZ United <3s Ballack (#13) and his deadly jeep of death. He opened our eyes to the power of the Shiv, before/as he tried to stab us.
The Top Ten Slogans for Wal-Mart's Boxed Wine, from David Letterman:
10. "When Kmart Wine Just Won't Do"
9. "I Can't Believe It's Not Wine"
8. "Show Your Friends How Little You Care"
7. "Kills Germs on Contact"
6. "Recommended by 4 Out of 5 Drifters!"
5. "Crack Open a Can Today!"
4. "Fresh From the Vineyards of Aisle 6"
3. "Here's to Making Bail!"
2. "Feeling Down After Being Thrown Out by Britney?"
1. "Goes Great With a 20-Dollar Hooker"
Mmmmmm Tasty, *raises box again*
- Cheers Mates
