In a pitcher, mix:
3 parts sacramental wine (red is preferred)
2 parts brandy
1 part lighter fluid
a dollop of O'Keefe's Working Hands cream
Stir until the cream is evenly distributed through the pitcher
Strain through a cassock and serve in a wine goblet
Plastic lime garnish is optional
Though it seems extraneous, the Working Hands cream is vital.
Our numerous trials at the Burch have shown that without it your urine and sweat will burn for days afterward.
WARNING: Do not smoke within 72 hours of mixing, drinking, or seeing a Confessional.
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