User:Jerden

This is Jerden, the High Lord of Crowbank, leader of Jerden Rules Crowbank (JRC). I also play Dr Frank Franklin, who's a friendly Dual Nature Necrotech Scientist, who actually delivers vigilate justice to PKers when he's got the ammo and a good reason, and recently I created Old Barbara, a zombie granny ready to strike at the living. I recommend that you don't take anything I or any of my characters says seriously, as I certainly don't.

	Alt user
	This user has alts but DOESN'T Zerg.

	Fair Tactics Leader
	This group leader has ratified the Coalition for Fair Tactics Group Pledge.

	PKers are people too!
	This user or group acknowledges the fact that PKers play a legitimate role in a zombie apocalypse and that they are people too.

‎	Player Killer
	"One kills a man, one is an assassin; one kills millions, one is a conqueror; one kills everybody, one is a god." This user is a PKer and supports the act of Player Killing.

	Sacred Ground Policy Supporter
	This user or group supports the Sacred Ground Policy and acknowledges that all Cemeteries in the city of Malton are considered Revivification Points.

Jerden

Some call me Crazy. Egotistical. Sociopathic. Megalomanical. Delusional. Ridiculous. Moronic. Stupid, Pathetic, Useless. And others call me His Majesty. Not really that many, and I think they're laughing as they do so, but I am Jerden. And I say I rule Crowbank. That's right. Jerden Rules Crowbank. You will have heard of it, as I'm telling you about it now.

I don't really mind how people play the game, as long as they enjoy it. And I prefer to play Urban Dead by leading my group, helping those in need, talking with others, spay-painting propaganda, and also killing anyone who gets in my way, or anyone who deserves it, or anyone who's a bit too non-descript or anyone who's in the general area when I'm particually trigger happy:

	PK Count
	Jerden has PKed 75 people.

Some would say I take this far too seriously. I say that I just don't even take not taking things too seriously seriously. (Trust me, it makes sense in my head! A lot of weird things do.)

Why should I rule Crowbank? Better question - Why not? (Post your answers to my discussion page and I'll see if they're good enough to add below!)

Now, based on the number of people on this list, quite a few people who disagree with my claim to Crowbank. Or maybe they just don't like me killing random people, but my victims either started it first or were bland, non-descript and uninteresting, and thus deserving of some excitement.

Now, about me. I joined the military, but for some reason, none of my comrades liked me, which may explain why I was airdropped into Malton in May 2011. I decided to save this godforsaken city from the zombie apocalypse thing that everyone was worried about. Living dead? What the heck was all the fuss about?

My dream of single headedly destroying the undead menace was crushed very shortly by a zombie when it turned out I was rubbish at staying alive. I wandered Malton as a zombie for a long time, thinking profound thoughts like HARMAN HARMBARGARZ, until I got revived and tried my hand at PKing with only Basic Firearms Training and a Fire Axe. Stupid idea, but I had been a zombie for a long time so killing humans was all I knew.

I continued my unlife as a zombie for a while, gained XP and when I was next revived I took up PKing until I found myself in Crowbank with plenty of fire power. I then got to work making enemies. One day an idea struck me, a wonderful idea, and JRC began! I swore of violence in favor of peaceful speeches and graffiti, but I got bored. I like to think that I now add a little challenge, a bit of crazy fun and a lot of random violence to Urban Dead. Some would say I ruin the game, but they're just bitter pro-survivors who haven't realized the fun side of undeath. I do try to improve Crowbank, but you know how it is, you get bored of that, and that doesn't win you fame and loathing.

I should probably add that several people have, rather bizarrely suggested that I've taken a few to many headshots and gone a little nuts, but they're all jealous. And probably dead.

My References from friends, enemies, bystanders, walls, and that talking box I carry around with me:

• Wow. Jerden you Rule! -- A ZOMBIE ANT
• Jerden is everything right about Urban Dead. -- Ross Less Ness
• Either you really are just totally inept, from the feeble coat of arms with its awful Google Latin, to the mish-mash of rules and stream-of-consciousness ramblings, or the [the JRC] page is the work of a truly twisted genius. I'm going with the first theory. -- Mallrat ^{TSI TKS CTD}
• Jerden > TSI. Mallrat just feels threatened :D --RadicalWhig
• I would love to pay an homage to High Lord and Supreme Ruler of Crowbank, Jerden. --
• "I know that zed. ID 1919714. JRC are loose cannons." -- Charles Balfour
• "We are simply the collective will of all Crowbankers and friendly neighbours who do not wish to see Crowbank fall under the iron-heeled jackboot clownshoes of any self-proclaimed 'rulers'." -- The FLUCkers, complimenting my leadership.
• "Ah, hello there, Jerden! I've joined up with Squadron 1111. I hope we don't decide to try and clear you from Crowbank. I like the touch of insanity you give the place." -- Doctor Zomb
• "Jerden I've heard about you but never seen you, was starting to think you were a just a story to scare new players with." -- NordickWarrior
• "Don't mind me, Your Effervescence." -- Malodorous Monk
• "Hey Jerden -- I see lots of spray paint around calling for your head -- however, Luis Tully has told the VZW to leave you be, so I'll just tip my hat and say howdy. Take it easy and as a favor try not to kill VZW folks, fair enough?" -- Vincent Coccotti
• "Be careful, Jerden is here, and knowing all and seeing all means he's omniverous." -- Malodorous Monk
• "It's a strange smelly beast, the jerdanja" - graffiti in the Curtice Building.
• "Hey, cool it's Jerden" -- keepster33
• "I love the smell of Jerden in the morning." "Smells like menthol." -- Radio messages on 26.16 MHz.
• "I'm a big fan Jerden! Keep cracking us all up please." -- Seth Meyers
• "This Jerden is a psycho!" - some graffiti states the obvious in the Grinham Building.
• 26.16 MHz: "Hither comes Jeden the Crowbankian, perfect-haired, mad-eyed" "axe in hand, a reaver, a slayer, a ruler, with gigantic" "melancholies and gigantic mirth to tread the jeweled thrones" "of the Earth under his booted feet. To crush his enemies," "to see them driven before him and to hear their lamentations" "http://y2u.be/jtEkhtOZEhg" "when you see him that'd be great)"
• 26.16 MHz: "Jerden couldn't run clock radio, much less Crowbank"
• 26.16 MHz: "a somewhat polite douche" (don't we all aspire towards that state of being?)
• "Another PK'ing assclown cleansed by UDFark" - Bison Dele (Cleansed? I'm not a smear, I'm more like a damp patch that reappears every time you guys paint over it)
• 26.16 MHz: "Pay no attention to the schizo Jerden" "He and his tapeworm don't even rule the toilet" (LIES! The royal posterior is undisputed master of the bathroom!)
• "*wary* pleased to meet you umm your majesty? I was just passing through...lovely town you have here" -- Seraphina Saint
• "Now that I found you Mr Jerden, I'd like to apologize, sorry. You arent such a bad guy after all." -- Pistol Whipz
• "I'm a big fan Jerden! Keep cracking us all up please." -- Seth Meyers (He may be laughing at me, but at least he's not shooting at me!)
• "A certain malodorous monk told me that Jerden smells worse than he does ; )" -- Moah Lester
• "You are a poo poo head" -- Moose Hole

	Honor Among Thieves
	This user supports the Honor Among Thieves Policy.

	PKer
	Jerden is a PKer and is probably off killing some poor defenseless survivor.

	Trigger Happy
	This user has guns. Do not cross them.

Dr Frank Franklin

He was once a nerd. He liked it. He was safe and content, graduating university with a PHD in Necrology. He joined Necrotech (Who else?) and hoped his employers wouldn't end up causing a zombie apocalypse. Frank believes, I stress based purely on lab rumors and deductive reasoning (guesswork) that this whole thing was caused by scientists trying to create a drug that could cure death. The problem with the revivification drugs Frank was experimenting with before the apocalypse (on rodents) was that they never worked well on corpses for some reason. It is possible that the disease was caused in a well intentioned way to preserve the vital functions until the cure could be provided to the individual inflicted with the normally fatal affliction of death. Frank certainly didn't cause the outbreak, as he always followed Lab Safety Procedures, and sincerely hopes it was accidental, although when you see some of the weirdos apparently working for Necrotech these days.... Anyway, something happened, and Frank eventually decided that he couldn't ignore the problem any longer. He took to the streets and eventually found a home at The Pippard Building Necrotech Rot Revive Facility in South Blythville, although he does get bored and travel sometimes, often with fatal results, which brings out a less pleasant side of the Doctor...

	Dual Nature
	This user supports the Dual Nature Policy.

	Combat Reviver
	This user or group supports the strategy known as 'Combat Revival'.

	Fertilize the Land Policy
	This user or group believes in regaining NT buildings at any cost!

Old Barbara

AKA Arrh Barbarah. A new character, intended to be a grumpy old lady. I figured that there's not enough elderly people in this game, you know? Rose from the dead the first time in Farnworth Alley in New Arkham. She's irritated by the livings' stupid names and loud noise and general disrespect shown to the dead these days, and so wishes to help the living understand the challenges of the zombie lifestyle, by killing as many of them as she can. She tries to nurture the undead "young uns" by leaving plenty of infected corpses outside for them to gain experience on. She joined the Big Bash 4, and is now just sort of wandering around, following the groans and helping make Malton a deader, quieter place.