St. Anastasius' Royal Guard

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Abbreviation: S.A.R.G.
Group Numbers: Over 9000 troops
Leadership: Council-Elect
Goals: Domination
Recruitment Policy: Visit our Talk Page
Contact: Radio Broadcast Frequency (26.64 Mhz)


We are the premiere Player Killing group in Urban Dead, and one of the few surviving groups that have played since Kevan created the game. Best known for appearing cyclically every two years, leaving a trail of wanton destruction on both sides, SARG (as it's come to be known) and their members believe that the disruption of survivor and zombie strategies are key to creating the chaos the city needs. In 2020, we are celebrating over 13 years of PK'ing, GK'ing and RK'ing and we couldn't be more proud. Welcome to the page, please take a seat and enjoy the ride.

Our Shanty, courtesy of the Godson arms gang C. 2007:

26.07 MHz: "As I walked out over Heytown fair, one misty morn" (5 hours and 5 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "early. I overheard the barhah call for the life of" (5 hours and 5 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "my Godson. Oh she won't perish to claw nor teeth," (5 hours and 5 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "But her 'cades lie ravished by a-plenty. Nestled" (5 hours and 5 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "in sweet Crakser triangle she weeps verily for her" (5 hours and 5 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "patrons. Oh my friends fall to zeds and alts, of" (5 hours and 4 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "zergs and griefers daily! With such malice in" (5 hours and 4 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "these mean streets we shall not loose our waaay." (5 hours and 4 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "Lament her loss, we shall not, we shall retake her" (5 hours and 4 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "surely! And get back to being drunk and in the" (5 hours and 4 minutes ago)
26.07 MHz: "morning, hurl-y. "


We're back baby. Special thanks to General Deaths View and S00P for keeping SARG in the fight from 2009-2013, through 2019 and again this year. Let it be known that Raines Hills is effectively a free-fire zone and any and all trespassers within our beloved Church or the neighboring squares will be shot and mutilated on sight. You have been warned.

  • For the rest of the old shit, like war stories or whatever, feel free to check out:
Our Archive


Juan Delomarchs arrived in Malton just months before the viral outbreak. Juan was a minister with connections to a shady Pharmaceutical company operating in the area, but his ongoing involvement with Necrotech was unclear. Delomarchs was attempting to clean up a public relations nightmare that NecroTech had created in an earlier incident, involving the loss of a highly dangerous neurotoxin. After the virus began to spread, Juan took aside four of his loyal bodyguards and started a violent militia to protect the neighboring church and adjacent streets, hoping for a quick rescue.

After months without rescue, and seemingly without hope, the newly dubbed 'St. Anastasius' Royal Guard' was born and sworn to protect the minister. Seeking to keep his seat in the pulpit in the throes of chaos, Juan ordered the guard to actively recruit members in any way necessary. The Guard's numbers swelled with desperate and increasingly violent men... and within a week, a member of the church by the name of Texas had broken off from the chain of command and formed a new right wing subsidiary of the guard. Tensions were at an all time high.

Three days after this new unit's formation, on April 4th, 2007, "war" was officially declared on the surrounding areas. In the days that followed, many generators and radios were destroyed. The carnage that ensued was dubbed "The Raines Hills War" by locals. During all of this, Juan Delomarchs cowered in the church whilst his crazed soldiers caused mayhem and destruction.

Order of Battle


Active engaged: ~50
Killed: ~50
Wounded: ~5
Active engaged: ~100
Killed: ~56
Wounded: Unknown
Active Engaged: 163
Killed: 100+
Wounded: 270
Civilian Deaths: 200+
See also Battle for the Holt Building
See also The Battle for Heytown

Notable Divisions

Circa 1861.
  • The St. Anastasius Royal Intelligence Agency - ACTIVE

The Royal Intelligence Agency is a subsidiary of the Guard that deals strictly with counter-intelligence. Many of our agents are deep undercover and will stay that way for the remainder of their UrbanDead Careers. The R.I.A. currently numbers less than 20. Engaged the Concerned Citizens, the Heathers and the Militant Order of Barhah in 2007, and again in mid-July of 2008.

Circa 2006.
  • The 1st Royal Infantry Division - ACTIVE

Formerly known as the 20th Infantry Division, this particular unit was involved in the first siege of Raines Hills, the Battle of Santlerville, and the execution of over 200 civilians during the Farbrother War. It's to be noted that the Terror Soldiers were a subsidiary of this unit.

Circa 2005-2009
  • The St. Anastasius 1st Royal Medical Batallion

The Medical Batallion is the base of our operations in enemy-held territory. They are the instrumentors of life and sometimes....unlife. The Medical Batallion is notable because they took part in the Battle for the Holt Building, inflicting the most casualties. The unit was disbanded sometime in 2008 after a series of mysterious circumstances.

A moron in 2007; One of the thousands that made up the majority of Malton.


Generators Destroyed:158

Barricades Knocked Down:118

Radios Destroyed:125

Morale crushed: Hundreds.

"Fucked and Chucked" enemies

Isabela Keys (October 15th)

BainBrain (October 15th)

Solid Arm (October 13th)

DJ Bubbles (May 25th)

Big breasts (May 25th)

Barney Magrew (May 25th)

Mcreery (May 25th)

Eat my shizz (May 25th)

Heather Gratuitous (May 26th)(x2)

misterdoodbob Channel 4 News Team (May 26th)

ColorBlue VGCSU (May 26th)

Tyoril (May 27th)

Skoorjbnhoj (May 27th)

WINGROVE (May 27th)

M60fly (May 31fst)

Xolix (June 5th)

freealan (June 6th)

Dawns Engima (June 14th)

Cambo81 (June 15th)

Ghost Halo Metal Fox (June 15th)

Stabbymcaxeforface (June 15th)

Hannibal Zane MFD (June 15th)

Kurt Wells Pwnt (June 15th)

Charley Cobbleton Armastead Librarians (June 15th)

Hunor (June 15th)

Kiva Grady (June 15th)

Liberal Pi (June 15th)

Hubdra (PDA) (June 15th)

Raynx (June 15th)

MartyB (June 16th)

JenJen (June 16th)

Ryuodo (June 16th)

Rhuster (June 16th)

Chompnchew (June 16th)

Tampopo (June 16th)

Chemille (June 16th)

Mechacon4 (June 16th)

CyberCrist (June 16th)

Van Dangerous (June 16th)

daslwen (June 16th)

Orzhov (June 16th)

Liandre (June 16th)

Petemadera (June 16th)

ReillytCS (June 16th)

Remora Nichiya BAR (June 16th)

Eric Brunnelman (Featherstone) (June 16th)

JbIso (June 16th)

ThEbLeAk14 (June 16th)

Charley Cobbleton (Again;BAR) (June 16th)

Madpilot (June 16th)

Kurt Wells (June 16th) (again)

Trailblazer (June 16th)

Deck Hastle (June 16th)

BadMonkeyJunkie (June 16th)

Phantom Dog (June 18th)

Damien Wells (June 18th)

Henery Zhang (June 19th) DEM

Melkathi (June 19th) DEM

RedWolfFang (June 21st) Metal Fox

Bono Landy (June 24th)

XabbysX (June 27th)

Officer Duncan (July 2nd)

Intelguy THEM (July 5th)

XZero09 THEM (July 6th)

T DOT THEM (July 7th)

Peter Doe THEM (July 7th)

Volker Krast (July 7th)

whitdemon (July 7th)

Master Fire Chief (July 7th)

Mad Midnight Reviver (July 7th)

Leon Unoriginal (July 9th)

Pvt Hale (July 10th)

LikeDUH (July 11th)

Natiliana (July 12th)

Watch and Ward (July 13th)

Sixth Maste (July 14th)

Rick Sunter (March 23rd 2018)

Alice Ticker (March 26th 2018)

Prof Q A Wagstaff (March 26th 2018)

averanged (March 26th 2018)

Terral (March 27th 2018)

David Banter (March 27th 2018)

Bottlecap112 (March 27th 2018)

Pierre Parker (March 27th 2018)

Prof Q A Wagstaff [again] (March 27th 2018)

DCI Sam Tyler (March 27th 2018)

C0RNH0LI0 (March 27th 2018)

Erick Vandarberg BAR (March 27th 2018)

Harold Crumbtooth BAR (March 27th 2018)

Ruben Kincaid (March 27th 2018)

Ambarishimmortal (March 27th 2018)

passy (March 28th 2018)

Dr Edward P Swartz (March 28th 2018)

Robert Bullimor (March 28th 2018)

Ranger Mark (March 28th 2018)

Daffy (March 28th 2018)

Top Sarge (March 28th 2018)

gvcci (March 28th 2018)

Hate Crime (March 29th 2018)

Ozmandius Prather Knights Templar (April 17, 2018)

Sesame Street Blues Knights Templar (April 18, 2018) Archie Wright Knights Templar (April 19, 2018)


Most likely you.

Policies We Support

DeathValley.jpg Scorched Earth
This User or Group supports the Scorched Earth Policy & acknowledges that all revive points must be razed and their inhabitants killed.