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Group 0 Changing Hands
For the past months, Group 0 has been led fearlessly by resident brain enthusiast Droggog. His campaign led to memorable sieges on Tynte Mall, St Matthew's Cathedral, and many other (formerly) well defended Police Departments and Nerotech offices. Under his command, he led group 0 to new level of feasting and dismemberment; prosperous times for the RRF
However, as of earlier this week, the fearless leader stepped down from his comfortable position to pursue other matters close to the horde, leaving his former capo, Deathbymoshpit, who is actually superhero Reed Richards (A.K.A. Mr. Fantastic) of the Fantastic Four, in charge of running the ever-growing horde.
“This is a great experience, I’m glad I finally have the chance to…..brrrraaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnssss….sorry…force of habit. I’m glad I finally have the chance to lead a formidable section of the horde”, says the newly appointed leader. He promptly lead Group 0 during the ransacking of both Blackmore and Nichols.
When asked about his commitment to the Malton Herald and Sun, Richards replied, “This will only help my journalism. I now have ample opportunity to head where the stories are. ‘Join the RRF! Meet lots of interesting people…and eat them’ couldn’t apply better to this situation. As we move away from home, I’ll be able to interview our brethren fighting far from home, and have the opportunity to take photographic evidence of our horde's continued prevalence in Malton.”
With the aid of a superhero at the helm, the future for Group 0 can only be full of bloodbaths, raids, and a good barhah for all. All devoted Group 0 followers are advised to watch thier forum thread closely for updates, objectives, and parties.
Editorial: November 5th
Ah, November 5th. When the harmanz will determinedly attack the zombah homeland. The zombah homeland so dutifully kept as such by the RRF. The same RRF that the harmanz love to disparage and discount.
Apparently the RRF is so weak that the harmanz are planning on sending barricade strafers and zombie trojan horses into our home more than two weeks in advance. The RRF is so weak that one week before the 5th, the C4NT and BBB are planning on coming in from the south and west; the PTT is planning on coming in from the north and the CDF is planning on coming in from the east. We know if we were facing a weak, washed-up joke of a zombie group that we’d send four of the five largest survivor groups in Malton after them.
We also know that if we had all that support, we’d bitch like hell if the RRF called in some help of their own. Heaven forfend that Malton’s zombahz show the slightest bit of Barhah and unite to liberate the harmanity of anyone dumb enough to invade the homeland.
We suppose its part of the innate harman inferiority complex. They lock themselves up all day, desperately barricading their own little prisons. Then they wake up the next morning to find that it was useless because we greeted them overnight and made them one of our own. Oh sure, the meatbags might use their precious resources to knock us down. But all we have to do is stand up to regain our full zombah glory. They have to wait in line, sitting uselessly until their precious harmanity is restored.
The RRF is resigned to having a massive target upon our back because we dare to have our own home, we dare to defend it and we dare to defeat the harmanz every time they intrude. One wonders if the RRF is a washed-up joke of an organization what that makes the harmanz we regularly eject from Ridleybank.
Regardless, we welcome all harman interlopers for the fifth. You may not realize it now, but a good dose of Barhah does wonders to one’s corpse – which is how all of you will end up. C4NT: We shall introduce you to true class. BBB: We’ll be waiting for you at Blackmore. PTT: All your brain are belong to us. CDF: It’s nice of you to finally leave Giddings for the greener, rotted pastures of Ridleybank.
We’ll be waiting.
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Better Know an Enemy:The Malton Rangers
Ahh, nothing like the feeling of the RRF completely pwning an enemy. And guess who gets pwned by the RRF more frequently than anyone else? That's right. It's part two of our ongoing series, Better Know an Enemy.
The Malton Rangers: the fightin' Rangers! Recently suffering defeats at the hands of the RRF at Blackmore I, Blomfield Grove PD, Blackmore II, Nichols Mall and Shackbank, this team keeps rushing back into the breech against the RRF and always ends up running away defeated. So who leads this distinguished group? Well, it's none other than our good friend, Dickhole Guy who was recently promoted to this spot. We recently had a chance to sit down with Mr. Guy in Shackbank. Here's what he had to say.
What you giving that special zombie in your life this upcoming Barhahmas season?
MH&S: Congratulations on the promotion. What are your goals for the Malton Rangers?
DHG: Goals would probably have to be getting numbers up. The guys I have now are supurb fighters and are well co-ordinated. The only reason I got promoted was because of them. They are always there when I need them I'd name them individually, but they know who they are. So, back to the question, I'd say goals are to keep recruiting, get the power rangers (the new subgroup) up and running, and get a wiki template that doesn't suck.
MH&S: How do you respond to the critics who say you haven't won a major battle since you became leader of the Rangers?
DHG: I'd ask them to look at the serrell building in yagoton. This morning there were 30 zeds inside, now its caded and powered with 15 or so rangers inside.
MH&S: Quite the major victory.
MH&S: Do you support Jane Harman's bid to become Chair of the House Intelligence Committee?
DHG: Yeah. 4 years of republican leadership has gutted the intellegence community, and they are probably worse off now than before 9/11.
MH&S: It's good to see harmanz sticking together for once. Too bad Pelosi gave the spot to known zombie sympathizer Sylvestre Reyes.
MH&S: You seemed kind of stunned after Blackmore and Nichols fell within 24 hours of each other. Did the rapid fall come as a surprise to you?
DHG: Yeah it did. I couldn't believe it. I thought the BBB had taken a lesson from the mistakes of caiger, when help is needed, send help. I think the fort implementation was the nail in the coffin for blackmore II though, as within minutes of its announcement we lost 30 defenders.
MH&S: Ron Burgundy has perfect hair. What do you have going for you?
DHG: Yeshamesh, My name a Deekhole guy, I like a you, I like a sex, its niiice.
MH&S: So Ron obviously has much more going for him. Final question... Jorm: Great forum admin or greatest forum admin?
DHG: ...greatest...
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